I stand there in total shock. I know for a fact my mouth is wide open.

"You brought me up here," I say as I twirl my finger around in the air, "for a picnic?"

He nods his head as he sits down and grabs things out of his bag, "I even brought us food," he says.

"Are we staying here all night?" I ask as I sit down in front of him.

"Mhm."

He grabs out two red solo cups and pours apple juice in them.

I give him a weird look and he frowns, "they didn't have anything else at the market," he says.

I hold back a chuckle as I sip on the juice. More snacks like crackers, chocolate, and other food is emptied from the bag onto the blanket.

"I want to know everything about you," Carter says to me as he opens a box of Cheez-Its, "problems, good things, bad things."

I pause my sipping, "why?"

"Because," he says, "there's more to you than what you tell me and I think it's bull shit."

I roll my eyes at him. The small light on the building reflects off his face and I make out a smile on his face.

"Oh yeah?" I tease, "I didn't think you'd want to know so badly."

"You'd be surprised on the things I'd like to know about you."

He puts some chips into his mouth, some dust getting on his lips and making me slightly smile. "Let's start with your past. Tell me about it."

I contemplate leaving his ass up here to freeze but then I realize how much effort he's put in for me. How badly he truly wants to know me, and I decide to let it all out.

For the first time with any person, I'll tell him everything.

Why? I can't answer that. I just feel like I should.

"Okay," I start, "I grew up in a smaller town in Colorado with a single mother and myself. I've never known my dad, never even seen what he looks like. My mother refuses to talk about him, even to this day."

He stays silent as he surveys me. Those blue eyes stuck on my face as I continue.

"My mom got knocked up at 18, had me, and did part time college courses for nursing when I was little. Since she worked in the med field, I barley ever saw her. We never had that good of a relationship."

He cocks his head to the side, "what do you mean?"

"She treated me like shit my entire teenage years," I confess as I take a sip of my juice, "It was always being nice one second and making my life hell another. I could never win with her."

Carter nods his head in understanding.

"I grew to become closed off and rude," I pause, finding the words difficult to form, "because that's how I was treated. I never had a voice in my home. Never had an opinion."

He stops completely and when I look up, his eyes are sad. Sad in a way where he finally connects the dots.

I chug the rest of my juice in hopes of it washing away my stupidness of telling him these things.

"What about you?" I ask him, attempting to change the subject, "why do you smoke?"

He chuckle, "I told you. It's therapy. And I don't smoke anymore."

"What?" I say in surprise.

"Yeah," he says, "It's hard but I've stopped."

"Because?"

"Reasons," he says with a smirk. "Other than that, my favorite color is black. Incase you ever need to know."

I grab a piece of cheese and throw it at him.

"Okay. What about your past?" I ask him.

He takes a deep breath before picking at some fruit with his finger.

"Well, I grew up going to private schools, yacht summer trips and private cabin Christmases," he confesses.

My eyes widen in shock. He said so many things in less than 10 seconds.

"But life was never," he pauses, looking at the sky and taking a moment to form the words, "easy."

I sit there completely still.

"My life was good when I was little, but when my mom died, things changed. I was 10. She was on her way home from somewhere and a car crashed into hers. The only thing I remember from her funeral was my dad. He didn't cry."

My heart drops at his honesty. I have no clue what to comprehend.

"From them on, life got worse. My dad remarried and I grew up," he says. His voice gets noticeably quieter before he talks again, "her name is Charlotte. She's a gold-digging bitch who didn't want anything to do with my family except our money."

I take a deep breath, the cold air burning my throat. He crosses his legs and inhales a deep breath before looking at me.

I thought my life was bad. And it was. But his... his was so much more complicated.

I never would've suspected someone like him going through things like this. It didn't even seem real.

"You seem so open talking about it, especially to me," I say

"Because I want you to know," he says softly, "I trust you. A lot."

"But why?"

This feels like a dream. All of it. The talking, al of the honesty.

I've never been so vulnerable with someone.

"Amanda," he says as blue eyes stare into mine "stop hesitating. I know you want to tell me things too," he states.

I pause for a moment and he doesn't push me. It takes me a moment to come to the realization of what he has said, what I have said, and why I am saying anything at all.

But I stop hesitating and tell him some truths.

"I'm guarded. I push people away. Especially those who care about me and I don't mean to."

His hair blows slightly in the wind, "not me. You won't push me away."

"Who says I won't?"

"I do," he says.

I pause again and we share a moment of just looking at one another. It isn't until now I feel that he truly understands me and that he's willing to understand me further.

"I won't allow you to push me away," Carter says, his rings shimmering in the moonlight.

I stay silent as he scoots closer to me where I sit. We both face the city. The lights of the sky scrapers bright with the rushing of taxis below us.

It's breathtaking to look at the city from up here. But it's really cold.

"Mandy," Carter says my name and for once I don't mind it.

"Yes?"

"You are the most complicated and incredible woman I've ever met."

I look at him. His face calm and naturally beautiful. I don't feel offended. In fact I feel honored that he understands what I am.

He continues as the visible breath leaves his mouth, "but that is what makes you beautiful."

He looks at me and I don't look away. I'm terrified to.

His eyes move from mine to my lips and suddenly, my body warms up.

Carter doesn't make a move though. He sits exactly where he is, surveying me.

I move closer to him, slowly. He stays still as I do.

"Mandy," he whispers, our lips inches apart. I can feel his warmth breath on my mouth and my body swarms with tingles.

"Yes?" I attempt to say but it comes out as more of a moan. I don't even recognize my voice.

"There's a problem," he whispers back. I close my eyes and stay where I am. I don't want to move away, not now.

"And that is?" I whisper back.

"If I kissed you," he whispers to me, slowly and seductively, "I don't think I'd be able to stop."

I feel a throbbing between my legs at his words but I push myself to stay where I am.

"Is that really a bad thing?" I ask.

"Yes," his voice grows deeper with desire.

I move away from him and open the distance between us. It takes a second for my body to cool down.

He does something to be I can't explain. My body goes against me.

"One day," Carter says to me as he looks at the view, "I will kiss you. And you'll enjoy it."

I scoff and roll my eyes.

You had the chance buddy.

"I'm tired," I say. He flips his wrist and looks at his watch, "it's only 2 am," he says.

"You expected me to stay out here all night?" I ask.

"Well yeah," he shrugs, "plus, your place is closed."

I shut my eyes in realization. I left at midnight and midnight is when they close on Sunday nights.

"Where the hell am I gonna stay then?" I ask. My voice raises in panic.

"You can stay at my place?" He suggests. I slit my eyes at him, "yeah right."

"Yes," Carter says as he looks at me, "this is my building."

My eyes widen, "this!" I point my finger to the ground, "this is your building?"

He nods his head, his blue eyes filled with amusement.

"Oh my god," I say as I slap my hand to my forehead. "I'm not staying with you."

"Where else are you going to stay, darling?"

I give him an annoyed look, "stop calling me that."

He puts his hands up in defense as always.

"Fine. I'll stay at your place, but not in the same room," I say.

I already have a reaction to his body the way I do. The last thing I fucking need is us being in the same room, let alone the same mattress.

No.

"Let's go then, m'lady," he says as he gets up.

"Not that either."

"It's either that or darling. You choose."

I roll my eyes with a sigh and help him pick up the snacks.

———————————

Carters apartment is gorgeous.

The windows are wider than anything I've ever seen, showing the city at its finest.

There is simplistic furniture in black and grey scattered in the apartment. The couch I will be sleeping on looks like a giant pillow.

"Here we are," he says as drops his keys on the very large white granite kitchen counter.

"I-" I say, speechless, "wow."

"I know right."

I look around. I feel almost too filthy to even be in here.

"My room is over there," Carter points to a doorway to the left of the living room. "The bathroom is to the right," he points opposite of his bedroom doorway.

"And if your still hungry," he turns around, "i'm sure you'll find your way."

Yeah. The kitchen is massive.

"Okay," I say.

I make my way over to the living room and place my stuff down gently. I'm scared I'll break something so expensive I'll go in debt.

He starts walking to his bedroom while removing his watch.

"Carter," I say. He turns around, his kind blue eyes meeting mine.

"Thank you."

He smiles at me, walks inside, and quietly closes his door.