Should I get that she fell for me?

Why would she want to evoke my jealousy if not?

I was jealous wasn't I ?

Am I in love and why is this different from loving Cynthia?

Seeing a man leaving my house late, saying that my wife is quite a catch and whistling rudely made my blood boil. I could not let him pass by without throwing a punch or two, or even three...I would have never allowed him to walk away with just a blue-eye but Alexa saved him. I was furious at her for meddling in.

Yes I, myself, have cheated on Alexa numerously and know that our "plan" allows her to act freely but the nearness of any guy to her has been turning me wild, lately. In mere months, I became possessive of her and if I remember right it did not settle right in me how Luca held her, the first time I met him. Back then, I passed my feelings as mere annoyance yet now I know fully that they weren't. Call me a Hippocrate but I refuse to see her being with another guy. Blame it on me being an only rotten,selfish child but I grew up sharing nothing and getting everything so I turned possessive: No one used to play with my toys without asking. No one shared the love of my parents with me. No one could lead the popular group but me...I was the center of my world.

Yet when it comes to Alexa, I am never a first choice. I am not even her second or third...Her heroes are always present; Luca is there and Jake also has joined the club. Her solo priority is Austin and she made it very clear that he is the apple her eye. I , in her world, am just another friend, an acquaintance, one from her entourage... Dear god, I am jealous from a baby, a mere eight-months old!

What are you doing to me Alexa?

Letting my head finally rest on the small pillow , I sighed loudly. She left an hour ago when Austin cried for her. The image of her blushing is now engraved in my mind. Her small reactions made my body heat up and get very excited. I wanted to bring her down and place her on my lap. I wanted to claim her lips again and maybe even make love to her...Was I allowed though?

Trying to clear my mind so I can sleep, I started to count stars, sheep whatever it took so I won't imagine her laying her naked next to me, with her feet entangled with mine...Dammit my brain is truly that of a horny teenage-boy. Finally resulting to cursing my damned imagination and giving myself lessons on how I should be a gentleman I finally fell asleep.

My dreams were very colorful that night to say the least and I would have wished to never wake up but the smell of bacon and eggs got my stomach roaring in hunger.

Last night, I promised myself to become Alexa's husband for real or at least get something started with her. My body awake or asleep accorded with my descion and I rushed to the shower to take care of something before getting caught by Alexa. I don't want our day to start awkwardly because I know for sure that my coming actions will startle her enough

Walking in out in only shorts, I joined her in the kitchen. With her back to me while cooking and singing along with Sinatra, she have totally missed me. My eyes drifted studying all of her; her messy bun of dark hair, her long blue-shirt that she used as a nightgown, her long legs and bare feet.How did I never acknowledge her is beyond me. As she walked to the near fridge. I silently walked close to her and enveloped her in a tight hug and dear god how this feels different from any lustful encounter I had before. Regardless of how tense she became, my head just rested on her shoulder and I waited for her to react.

"Good morning" I hushed at her

"Blaze?" she finally questioned sounding shocked. Her left hand came in contact with my hands trying to untangle them from her waist but I did not allow her"

"Yeah?" I questioned light pulling her closer to me and the warmth radiating from her got me to remember all my dreams of her.

"What are you doing?" she asked in a hush as I hid my head in her neck inhaling as much of her scent as possible.

"Becoming your husband." I confessed and the spatula in her hand fell off to the floor

"Are you drunk?" she questioned yet again trying to release herself from my hold but I firmly kept on holding her.

"Do I sound drunk to you?" I mumbled while a small laugh escaped my lips; her stubborn brain will never accept my sudden moves, I already accepted so.

"As matter of fact you do. Calling me pretty is one thing but playing my husband is another." she insisted while turning around to face me. Her face was inches away from me and her little gasp of surprise made me smirk. My presence does effect her whether she admits it or not. Her cheek turned redder by the second as I took in every small freckle of hers, her plump lips, her dark eyes and few escaped stubborn curls.

"I am not playing" I corrected eyeing her seriously hoping that she would get my message

"I cannot smell any alcohol in your breaths.What game are you playing, Blaze?" she angrily now asked while her shaking hands tried to push my chest away from her.

"I told you I am not playing." I warned getting a bit frustrated

"Yeah , sure. Now let me go I need to get Austin's bottle ready before waking him up." she ordered her eyes turning a shade darker if possible and her hands becoming more brutal in their pushing

"Let the kid sleep. We could enjoy one-hour alone." I ordered back

"If you are willing to babysit him by nighttime then I would let him sleep more. Also, you and I have no need to spend time alone. The last time I remember I asked you to keep me away from your games and bets.I am tired of all of that Blaze." she now warned and I could see tears filling her eyes

"No games, no bets anymore Lexi." I promised shocking not just her but myself also because I sounded so assuring , so truthful and my heart skipped a beat as she gazed at my blue-eyes searching for some explanation in them.

"Why so suddenly?" She doubted endlessly

"Why not so suddenly? Why does it matter when and how? Why can't I just want my wife?" I roared at her now fully angered . My hands finally gave her an escape as I walked a step back allowing her to eye me up and down and for some forsaken reason blush deeply.

" You are not dressed." she finally commented her looking down her feet. It is moments like this, that make me go wild for her.

"You just noticed?" I teased feeling my anger washing away

"I was entrapped and confused. I got caught up." she defended back not looking my way at all and I nearly laughed again seeing how cute she can be.

"I should always get you entrapped to see you blush." I teased more and she huffed reluctantly looking up and quickly gazing at my eyes and only my eyes.

"Why are you being sappy, blaze? " she seriously asked her eyes shooting daggers at me

"Because I want you babe. If my previous actions weren't telling, I will utter it slowly to you: I...Want...You." I slowly spoke to her and I saw panic and a slight fading happiness crossing her eyes.

"Why?" she asked for the twentieth time in ten minutes making me grumble in frustration

"Because you are simply my wife, mine and mine only. Because I have every right to hold you and kiss you senseless. Because I am lawfully meant to be by your side and make you laugh, smile and blush. I want you because you are simply affecting my heart, body and mind. I dream of you, god dammit. I have never been this desperate for a girl but here I am pleading, begging you and answering your endless doubts." I explained to her, finally walking the step that separated us and met her face to face again

"I am not your type. You laughed at me the first time we talked." she firmly bit back

"I didn't laugh at you as a person. I laughed at your plan. But I admit that for a long time I was blind, stupid call it whatever that pleases you." I adamantly echoed at her

"And why should I believe that you are not blind or stupid anymore? Why should I let you hold me and declare me as your wife truly, when in a month or even less you would get bored of me and go haunt for some model. Blaze, let us be friends only. I have wild dreams that will never settle with your world. We already went through this talk and it is for both our benefits..." she repeated that annoying speech and one tear escaped drawing its silent trail on her hot reddening cheek.

"What if I let you buy your cats and dogs? What if we in the right time get you pregnant. I am changing Alexa. You cannot give up on me when you started it all. I care for you way more than I care for any being. I am learning to love my son because you love him. Princess, I am seeing the world through your eyes now...It is less lustful and more calming and way simpler. I like it now. I am not supposed to play dirty with strangers or buy nonsensically pricey gifts to win bets. All, I want to do is wake up by you...Lexi I never said this to anyone not even Cynthia but I want you deeply and need you greatly." I confessed once again gathering her in my arms and to my utter surprise she just stood there totally silent.

"What if I am not ready for you? What if I want to breathe? Blaze , I like you a lot but lately our lives have been an insane mess. I feel like I brought doom upon your group as convinced Eric to ask Nina then got close to Chris. You treated him badly because of me. Austin , you could have gone living without knowing him but for some selfish reason I adopted him, unknowingly. You could have still been playing games and winning bets. I killed your fun and made your family fall in love with your unwanted baby. I am like plague to you." she talked back letting her tears finally fall "I also am fearful of letting you in. What if my heart ends up broken. You can easily find comfort else where but if I let my wall down I will never be able to stand strong again." she completed connecting her watery eyes with mine

"I don't just like you a lot lexi, I think I fell for you deeply." I finally spoke my true feelings to her as my hands cupped her face and I saw anticipation in her eyes and I too wanted to kiss her senseless but I only dried her tears. Then, leaned down and kissed her forehead for few moments. I want her fully but since her heart is still torn I would never force myself on her. " I will do whatever to prove it to you. I promise you that you will end up trusting me and falling too. Just promise me that it won't take you long. It is taking all myself control not to kiss you senseless now. Don't take too long princess."

"You don't have to go out of your way to earn my trust..." she shyly hushed diverting her eyes away from mine and allowed her head to rest on my naked chest. Every contact with her made my body heat up in an insane kind of way but for her I would ignore it for now.

"I will do whatever it takes." I promised holding her in my arms for five more minutes. We just stood there not willing to move as Sinatra continued to sing " Strangers in the night".

"Blaze, I real need to waken up Aussie and get his breakfast ready." she whined a bit shifting in my hold and I allowed her to move away

"I will awake him. You get the bottle ready." I informed and her mouth gaped at me

"You don't have to do so. Your not obliged to care for him or to help me out. I can handle him myself." she promised

"I am also his father. I need to start caring for him." I refused and walked to her room leaving her to overthink all again.