My dm's and tags have been blown up ever since I released my new song. And I was happy it was getting attention that fast, it had just dropped a few hours ago and it already has a million streams on a lot of platforms.

But with all of those dm's and tags, I couldn't respond to all of them, and also since I was on a plane back to my home state, Florida.

It was kinda refreshing to go back, but also made me extremely nervous.

I don't know what Florida holds for me, or what waits to get me when I land.

I don't even know if I'm going to see my parents at all, given Sarah is only sixteen she can't possibly live alone or even stay somewhere that's not under my family's roof. Since they were always strict about staying places that weren't home, it would be surprising if she even had a room with a door still on its hinges ever since I got kicked out.

I bet they were even curious if Sarah herself was also a raging homosexual like her disappointment of a sister.

Maybe even threatened her with some messed up bible verses.

Because even though they didn't do it to me, doesn't mean they didn't do it to her. Especially since they thought I was straight for so long.

—

I reached the airport and my stomach was doing backflips. I couldn't even begin to imagine what my sister looked like, let alone sounded like. She could be a totally different person by now!

I know I talked to her a little bit when I moved around. But after that we didn't really have anything to say to each other, which is surprising since we always talked when I was back home. But, she's different now, and I sure as hell know I've changed.

I wait near the entrance as she said she was going to pick me up. That seemed easy enough for me.

—

I'm just sitting here. I've been here for maybe twenty minutes now and it feels like forever!

"Y/n?"

I turn my head to see a tall, purple haired, girl as she smiled bright and had a backpack over her shoulder.

"Yes?"

I say back to her. Was this my sister? Woah.

"It's nice to finally see you, dork."

Yup, this was Sarah alright.

"It's nice to see you too,"

We embrace in a hug after all of these years. I wouldn't say YEARS, but it felt like it for sure.

Sarah was just so different looking. I wasn't hating or anything, it was just a complete change.

"I see you've got a new style."

I snicker to myself as I see her striped socks.

"I can say the same thing about you."

We smile at each other for a moment before Sarah says,

"Ready to go back home? The assholes are gone."

Once I heard that our parents weren't home I instantly agreed to going that second.

—

"Home sweet misery."

Sarah says to me once we get out of our lift from the airport.

"It's a lot older then I remember it."

I comment as I open the front door that was now more squeaky then before.

This place is more rundown and I could tell that it wasn't so taken care of after I got kicked. I guess I really did pull this shit of a house together.

"Oh! I gotta show you our rooms."

Sarah led me up the stairs that are so nostalgic to me as I was being dragged around. Which now feels like a normal thing for people to do to me now.

"Your room wasn't really touched once you left. But if you wanna take anything, go ahead. It's yours anyway."

Sarah says as she opens my door to show me my old room.

It had little to nothing in it. Just some band posters up, as well as a few pillows on my bed. Nothing really was left behind. But I can still remember my room like it was just yesterday that I was sitting in it.

"Nostalgic, right?"

Sarah let out a laugh as she joked with me while we walk into my room, Sarah leading the way as she points to random stuff and says how she remembers it.

"I didn't come in here much. It felt like I was invading your privacy still."

She lets out a laugh again as she takes a seat on my bed.

I look around once more. It was so familiar, yet it looked like my parents tried to forget about it.

"How are they?"

I asked Sarah as I sat down with her on my old bed, that was still squeaking might I add.

"Mom and dad? They're okay. I guess."

Sarah sighs as she goes into thinking, possibly recalling times she shared with them.

"They didn't speak much to me after. I mean, they still asked the occasional, "how are you?" but it, uhm, it never goes anywhere."

I put my hand on her back as she looks away from me.

"I'm sorry,"

"Why are you sorry y/n?"

Sarah asks me.

"I just didn't know. I should be here for you, and they treat you like shit."

I admit my faults to her as she just smiles at me.

"Y/n, I'm okay. I don't need them to entertain my life. Me not being gay doesn't mean shit to them, and that just proves they're bad at raising kids."

We share a small laugh as mine was more bitter then hers.

That whole conversation put me into a whole lot of questions.

Should I take Sarah with me when I leave? Should I let her stay here? Change names and identities? Maybe move to Canada after the name change?

No clue on what I should do.

"I know what you're thinking. And no, I don't need rescuing. I'm fine for now anyways."

Sarah was one of the few people that could really read me like a book. Since we

are siblings it just made sense for Sarah to be able to read me so well.

And she did it flawlessly every time.

"I'm correct. Aren't I?" Sarah says as she teases me.

"Of course you are. But are you sure?"

I ask her as she looks off, thinking just like me. I really didn't want to see her go down because our parents treat her so bad.

"I am. I have my ways when I sneak out, you don't need to worry about me."

Sarah smiles at me, and I can't help but to smile back.

It feels like old times, and I really wanted to tell her everything. Because I know that writing my feelings on a piece of paper doesn't change a thing.

"The gears stop working up there or something?"

Sarah says as she laughs at me.

"Can I tell you something serious? Like, very serious."

Sarah looks at me and nods, waiting for me to go on with what I'm supposed to be saying to her.

"So, you know Billie right?"

I ask. Sarah chuckles and looks down, only to say,

"Of course I do. What about her?"

"Well, when me and her talked the first time it didn't just stop. I don't know if mom or even dad told you why they kicked me out. But, it was because of her. I went to go see her and go to this party. A lot happened during that time, and I even lost a friend because of this."

I take a deep breath to collect my thoughts, to piece them together.

"But literally ever since then it's been an off and on friendship and relationship. And seeing you was kinda a way to get away from her. I do music, we're both in the industry, and I love it, but honestly with her my life can be a lot to deal with."

Sarah listened to all of this while having a blank face.

"So, you never told me this because?"

"Because it all happened so fast. And I know you knew about our open friendship and even the rumors but, it was a come and go experience and it was just so fast that I didn't even have time to tell you."

I put my hand on Sarah's and look over to her.

"Sarah, if I could go back and tell you when it was all going on, I would. But I can't."

Sarah lets out a sigh and makes eye contact with me.

"Then what are gonna do when you go back? Do you still like her?"

"I do still like her. But it's just so weird now, and I don't even know how to approach it."

Sarah looks off in the distance, processing everything.

"Then why don't you just give it a break for now? Focus on you,"

"I've been trying. It doesn't work out too well."

"Excuses!"

Sarah yells.

"Seriously try y/n! When was the last time you ever tried that?"

Nervously looking around my old room, I try to make up an excuse as to why I haven't been focusing on myself. I never thought to just take a break for my own good, because it all seems well until it doesn't. And then I'm stuck in the middle of things during that time.

"Okay, you got me. But I didn't have time!"

No matter if I was looking at her or not I know for a fact she was rolling her eyes at me.

Sarah gets up off of the bed and stands in front of me, her lips turning to make a smile.

"Y/n. Just relax. And if I were you, I wouldn't give Billie the time of day. Fuck her!"

Sarah's motivational speech's come to a holt as her eyes go wide.

"Not like that!"

She adds on, now with a big smile and slightly pink cheeks at her misunderstanding.

I shake my head at her then nod as I understood her the first time, before she had to ruin it for herself.

—

I bet a lot of people are gonna be mad that I left for months. But corona got me messed up and also high school started up so now I'm MORE messed up! But I hope everything is well. I promise you I'll be actually posting soon since I realize how much fun I had here. Make sure that you know that I won't be on this account much, but I'm not gone forever :)

–💚