It had been three weeks since I'd arrived at the Avenger's tower. My new room was on a different floor, and across from Bucky's room. He was on a mission, and I hadn't met him yet. I knew about his personality, but not about his past, or who he was.

Steve told me that it wasn't his place to tell me, and that Bucky would tell me if he wanted to.

I found that fair.

We were all currently hanging out on the common floor. I was leaning against the wall next to Steve.

"Have any nightmares?" Steve asked me quietly.

Steve was practically a brother to me now. He was always making sure that I was okay and comfortable.

"Yeah," I sighed.

*

I was sixteen years old. I was sitting in the living room with my parents reading a book. My mother was knitting, and my father was reading the newspaper. We all jumped at the sound of our door being smashed to smithereens.

"Stay here," my father said, grabbing a gun.

From our place in the living room, my mother and I couldn't see the front door. The sound of gunshots reached our ears and we both placed our hands over our ears.

"Get behind the couch!" my mother told me over the sound.

I ran and hid behind it as my mother grabbed her own gun. I pressed my body to the floor so that I could see underneath the couch. My mother leaned against the wall next to the opening. The noises stopped and I held my breath. A man entered the room and my mother acted, but the man was quicker. My mother outstretched her arms, ready to shoot. The man grabbed the gun, ripping it out of her hands. He flipped it around and filled her body with bullet holes.

Tears began streaming down my face. I listened as the man walked around my living room slowly. All he had to do was look behind the couch and he would find me.

The sound of more footsteps filled my ears.

"Well done, Soldier," a man said.

I shook as I hid, the tears flowing uncontrollably now.

"Sir, you might want to look at this," another voice said.

There was shuffling and scraping. I tried to control my breathing.

"They have a child?" the man who praised the 'soldier' said.

"She's in here," a deep voice growled.

I gulped quietly and closed my eyes.

"Where?" the man said.

I opened my eyes again. Footsteps walked towards my hiding spot. The couch rose from its place in front of me. I looked up to see a man wearing a black mask and black goggles. He was holding my couch above his head with a metal arm.

"You're the daughter of the l/n's?" one of the men asked.

I turned to look at him, my whole body shaking.

"Keep her," the original man said. "We might use her."

The soldier put my couch down and grabbed me with the metal arm.

That was the first time I met the Winter Soldier.

*

"Do you want to tell me about it?" Steve asked.

I shook my head. Steve nodded, understanding that it was hard for me to talk about these things. He knew that talking about my past was something I still had trouble with.

The elevator doors opened and there was an outburst of cheers.

"Bucky!"

I turned to face the person I had heard so much about. He had been enslaved by Hydra, just like me. I hoped that maybe I would be able to talk to him about my past, because he would understand. But when my eyes focused on him, there were only two emotions that I felt.

Fear, and anger.

Anger, for what he had done to me. Fear, that he may do it again.

The Winter Soldier's eyes met mine. They were filled with life and light now, unlike how they had been at Hydra.

Anger stirred deep in my gut. A rage, fuelled by the sight in front of me. A bubbling anger that was threatening to spill. And I let it.

I aimed the feeling at the soldier. He flew back and crashed into the wall, pushed by an invisible force. There were outbursts of concern, but I was already moving. The soldier had just gotten back to his feet when I slammed into him and tackled him to the ground. I straddled him and rained punch after punch down on his face. I might have been screaming; I might have been crying. I might have been making no sound at all.

A pair of arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me up. I struggled against them, but they held tight, so I fought harder. I smashed my elbow into their arms. I broke free and ran at the Winter Soldier again. This time, he was ready. I punched at his face and he dodged. He reached for me with his metal arm, but I kicked it away. He met all of my attacks, and I met his. I knew his fighting style, and he knew mine.

He had trained me, after all.

I managed to tackle him to the floor again. He flipped me over and pinned my thighs with his knees. It hurt a bit, but it was nothing compared to what he'd done to me before.

"Y/n! Are you crazy?" Steve yelled.

"You killed them!" I screamed at the Winter Soldier. "You killed them!"

The soldier's face crumpled in despair. I struggled against him, but it was no use.

"What the hell is going on?" Natasha asked.

"Do you even remember them?" I asked him. "Do you?"

"I remember all of them," he said sadly.

Tears were streaming down my face, but I still glared at him.

"Y/n, we need to talk," Steve said sternly. "And I swear, if you hit my friend again, I will knock you out."

I wanted to tell him that I'd like to see him try, but I just stayed silent instead. Bucky cautiously let me free. I stood up and stalked past him, following Steve down the hall. He turned into another room with a smaller lounge. He sat in a chair and I sat across from him.

"What was that about?" Steve asked.

"You didn't tell me that Bucky was the Winter Soldier," I said flatly.

"Because it wasn't for me to –"

"You could have warned me, Steve," I said angrily. "Want to know what my memory-nightmare was about? It was about him murdering my parents, and then kidnapping me!"

"I didn't know," Steve said apologetically. "But you should know, it wasn't him. Hydra brainwashed him. If you could give him a chance –"

"No," I said.

Steve sighed.

"Y/n, please be reasonable –"

"I am being reasonable!" I said. "What if Red Skull came back and we told you to give him a chance? What would you do?"

"Red Skull killed hundreds of people," Steve growled.

"And the Winter Soldier hasn't?" I retorted.

"The Winter Soldier and Bucky are two different people," Steve said.

I shook my head and leaned back in my chair.

"If we go back out there, are you going to try and kill my friend?" Steve asked.

"Maybe," I mumbled.

Steve glared at me and I sighed.

"No," I muttered.

"Good. Let's go then," he said.

We both stood up and walked back to the lounge room. Bucky and Bruce were gone, and there was a blood stain on the carpet.

"What was that all about?" Tony asked.

"I hate him," I said, before Steve could say anything.

"Y/n," Steve warned.

"You just asked if I was going to kill him," I said.

Everyone was staring at me, so I took a deep breath.

"He killed my parents," I said.

People began to look at me sympathetically.

"Was that you, before?" Wanda asked suddenly. "Did you use telekinesis?"

"I... uh... maybe?" I said, thinking about it. "I was... really angry, and I directed it at him and then he flew against the wall. But – but it can't be possible!"

"You broke out of my arms, too," Steve said. "Are you sure you're not a super soldier?"