《Guardians of Terraria》Episode 12.2 - It Can Talk?!
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"I believe the screams came from the Dungeon," the Wizard said.
"You're certain?" Meg asked, to which the Wizard nodded.
William looked to the Dryad and Witch Doctor, who also seemed to be slowly nodding. They had all gathered in one of the huts in the Jungle Village to discuss the screams.
"This might mean the Cultists are back there," he said. "Or even... Robyn."
"We did destroy the mechanical Cthulhu parts before," Meg pointed out.
"Robyn said to me that they didn't need the Mechanic anymore," William added. "Which tells me they have something else planned. And we don't know what. So, we should go investigate." He wanted to feel confident, but his heart was pounding from trepidation. Last time he'd tried to chase down Robyn, he'd almost gotten digested by a plant.
Sid nodded in agreement. "It's about time we take the fight to them."
"I sense that you are going to face a big battle if you go there," the Wizard said. "I shall accompany you."
"As will I," the Witch Doctor said. "That cold, dark dungeon can always use a bit more life."
"And me," a new voice said.
William turned to the hut entrance to see James the Clothier walking in, red hat firmly on his head, and a determination in his eyes.
"Are you sure?" Sid asked. "What if you... lose control and turn into Skeletron again?"
"All I want is to see those who cursed me dead," James said. "I'll never lose control."
"And if he does, I'll be there! Yarr!"
That was Red Beard the Pirate, who walked in and stood alongside the Clothier.
"The more the merrier," Sid said.
"So be it," the Wizard said. "We leave at dawn tomorrow."
***
Sid emerged from the pylon in a spray of sparks, entering the Desert Village. He walked up to a house that was covered with contraptions and machines, and knocked on the door.
Opening the door was a woman in green overalls and a black hat. She was Whitney the Steampunker, a new citizen that had moved in the day after the Mechanical Bosses had been destroyed.
"Evening."
"You said you had something to show us?" Sid asked.
"Yes," Whitney replied as she led Sid inside. "When I got here I heard about how Kayla had died. She was... my cousin." She paused, sounding solemn, then turned towards a black-suited form sitting against the wall.
"Mrunok left me the Cyborg she'd been working on, and I felt like she would have wanted to see it finished. In some ways, it's all that's left of her."
Sid nodded slowly.
"Let me just flick this switch..." she reached somewhere on the Cyborg's torso, and a second later blue lights began switching on across its arms and on its chest.
"Oh," a sudden voice emanated from the Cyborg. Standing up, Sid could see it appeared to be a mix of man and machine, with only his hands, mouth, and forehead exposed. He began looking all around, including at the wall behind him. "Where is everyone?"
"Oops. Forgot to plug in his visual sensors." The Steampunker reached down, picked up a disc-like object, and inserted it into the centre of the Cyborg's face. It glowed bright blue.
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"Oh, hello. I am Omicron, the Cyborg. I am designed as a provider of explosive munitions. How may I serve you?"
"Show me what you've got," Sid said.
Omicron suddenly ran forward, almost knocking Sid over, and straight out through the door, knocking it from its hinges. Once outside Sid watched as he fired a rocket at a nearby Possessed Armour, blowing it up in one shot. He then fired at a Demon Eye in the sky, also exploding it to bits. He then shot at a colourfully-dressed zombie standing in front of one of the other houses.
KABOOM!
The Dye Trader stumbled outside, an alarmed look on his face. "You blew up my dyed mannequin!"
"Error 62: Not a zombie," the Cyborg said robotically.
"Well, I approve of your destructive power," Sid said. "What do you sell?"
He opened up the Cyborg's interface, and was pleased to find he sold rockets – Rocket III's to be exact, which seemed to be a far more powerful variety than the Rocket I's that had dropped from Plantera. He bought nearly a thousand.
He also checked the Steampunker's shop inventory, and discovered she was selling a Jetpack.
Strapping it on, he said, "This'll be way cooler than those stupid Pixie Wings."
"I heard y'all are going on a big trip to the Dungeon tomorrow," Whitney said. "The Cyborg will need world experience in order to fit in and develop. How about you take him with you?"
"That, ma'am, sounds like a great idea," Sid said.
***
The next morning they all set off from the Hallowed Village. The Snow Village was much closer to the Dungeon, but it had largely been abandoned ever since the Mechanic and Goblin Tinkerer had moved out. The Demolitionist, who had then been the only other inhabitant, had opted to move back to the Forest Village.
And, of course, there was the house William had built for Robyn. He could still see it high up in the distance through the fog. He remembered all the memories of Robyn associated with the Snow Village – she had picked out its spot, and he had built the house for her as a way of saying thank you.
Though, he knew now that perhaps hadn't been the only reason.
He had crafted Turtle Armour from Chlorophyte mined in the jungle and some Turtle Shells that had dropped from the Giant Tortoises, which gave him the endurance of such an animal, but he still felt horribly vulnerable to thoughts of her.
He looked to the citizens that were accompanying them. The Pirate and Cyborg were bringing up the rear, a parrot sitting on Red Beard's shoulder. The two of them appeared to be engaged in conversation.
"I heard how ye have cannons for arms, laddie," Red Beard said, "Ye'd make a fine addition to any crew on the high seas."
"Liquid water may be hazardous to my internal wiring," the Cyborg said.
"Aye, but ye can still stay pretty dry onboard."
"Awk! Pretty dry!" the parrot squawked, hopping from the Pirate's shoulder onto Omicron's.
"Arr, it appears he likes you!" Red Beard pulled out a bottle of rum. "Have ye tried drinking yet?"
"I will need to build myself a taste mechanism," Omicron replied. His eye scanned over the party and landed on Merlyn the Wizard.
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"Error. Merlyn the Wizard's functions cannot be scientifically analysed. Neural functions overloaded. Translation: I hate this."
"Yer a funny one, laddie. What was that fine Steampunkin' lassie worried about, anyways? Yer already a fine human to me!"
"It appears I appreciate you saying that," Omicron said.
"Awk! Appreciate!" the parrot squawked.
Omicron stopped suddenly mid-stride.
"He pooped."
"I just realised something," Sid said as he walked up beside William.
"Yes?"
"Remember those keys we found? The ones that said they were cursed by a powerful jungle creature?"
William remembered. And based on the fact that they had just slain a powerful jungle creature, he knew where this was going.
"They're no longer cursed!" Sid exclaimed. "They both say they unlock a chest in the Dungeon."
"Nice," William said. "Good to know we've got that to look forward to, I guess."
"Wait," he heard Meg say at the front of the group. "There's something near the Dungeon."
The Dungeon rested at the top of a hill, appearing as harrowing as ever, but next to it, looking like it was a short distance behind, was...
"A giant mushroom?" William said. "What is that doing on the surface?"
"Looks like one of those glowing blue mushrooms," the Clothier said, looking strangely spry.
"I wonder if that's what the screaming was all about," Sid said.
"It's an abomination to nature," the Witch Doctor said. "It can't be anything else."
He continued to be on edge as they scaled the hill. The Dungeon looked to be as empty as ever, though that said nothing for what went on inside.
The glowing mushroom, on the other hand, appeared to be growing tall out of a patch of glowing blue grass in front of a forested area. Several others, not quite as tall but still sizeable, also dotted the area. William had seen a few caverns filled with blue grass and glowing mushrooms like these, but never any on the surface, and this biome certainly hadn't been here last time they'd come to the Dungeon.
There was also what appeared to be a small hut, built out of blocks of white fungi.
"This is the most delicious biome I have ever seen," James said, licking his lips.
"You guys stay back," William said. "Sid and I will investigate that hut."
He stepped into the glowing mushroom biome, his feet crunching on the fungi-encrusted mycelium. He walked up to a mushroomy door and tentatively knocked.
It swung open, revealing a lanky, white humanoid. Its skin was creamy like a mushroom's, and the only facial features it had were two blue eyes and that its head expanded out into a blue mushroom cap.
"Welcome to my humble abode," it said. "I must warn you that there is not much room."
William and Sid just stared at him, not sure what to say. The mushroom man had the label 'Porcini: 250/250'.
"Um... hi, I guess," William said. "How did you get here?"
"Oh, I've lived here my whole life. Two days! Just chilling in the nice, damp rain and snow next to that big blue building over there." Porcini pointed a spindly finger at the Dungeon. "I don't get visitors often – in fact, you two are the second lot of visitors to ever come here."
"Second?" William blurted. "Who was the first?"
"A wonderful young lady with fascinating red eyes," Porcini said. "I could stare at them all day. She even bought an Autohammer from me."
"A what?" William reached forward, opening up the mushroom's shop inventory. Sure enough, there was an item named the Autohammer. He didn't have nearly enough money to buy one, as they came in at almost a whole platinum, but its label read that it converted Chlorophyte Bars into Shroomite Bars.
Sid must've read the same thing, as he said, "Robyn must've used that to make a lot of Shroomite Bars. I'll have to ask the Guide what they're used for, but if I had to guess, she probably made some sort of armour out of them."
"Yeah," William said. He took a step backwards. "Nice talking to you."
"Good day, my friends!" the mushroom man said, waving at them with both hands.
Upon returning to the others Meg said, "The sun is going down. I'd say we head into the Dungeon, but the citizens are tired after walking all day for so long. We're going to set up camp for the night."
William nodded. "Alright. Probably won't hurt to keep an eye on the Dungeon during that time too."
***
Sid awoke from a sudden scream.
One that was then equally suddenly silenced.
He sat up, noticing the door at the mushroom man's house was ajar. The scream sounded like it had come from there!
He jumped up and ran forward, then slowed to a sneaky, quiet pace as he approached the door. He began to hear voices.
"Fury fills my being as abominations sprout from tainted Earth. The Truffle must be removed from this world!" The Witch Doctor.
"Hey, remember our agreement. I get half, you get half." That was the Clothier's British accent. "I've never seen anything so delicious in my life, can't believe I'm losing half of it to you. I mean, way I see it, if I eat it, it will be 'removed from this world', as you put it. What did you want it for again?"
"I wish to throw it in a pot and stew it until there is nothing left!"
Sid had heard enough. He burst inside and found the mushroom man tied to a chair, a gag across where a human's mouth would be (except it had no distinctive mouth).
"What are you doing?" he asked.
James and Zop'a stared at him.
"Busted," the Clothier said.
"Don't eat him, dudes!" Sid said. "He's just trying to live."
James suddenly roared. Before Sid could react, he had expanded outwards, smashing through the walls and ceiling of the mushroom man's hut, and morphed back into Skeletron.
He took some steps backwards, prepared to run back and get the Wizard for another incantation. But at that moment, Skeletron seemed to turn stiff, and just as quickly morphed back downwards into James.
"Whew. Sorry about that," he said. "I won't eat him."
Sid sighed in relief, glad to see he seemed to be mastering his control over Skeletron.
He could only hope that James would keep control when they entered the Dungeon tomorrow.
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