........💕💕

Something to think about.....💭

I stare at the file for what feels like hours, and then i remember him going berserk the other day, because i listened to Stephanie talk about his past.

I didn't go snooping around or asking questions, she offered that information to me willingly, perhaps even without any ill intent, but he still got so mad at me that he scolded me, at this parents house.

And yet, he went behind my back to do this!

How can he be such a hypocrite, and even worse, invade my privacy to such a level.

He lied to me.

Why would he investigate me like i was some kind of criminal and pretend like he is hearing everything for the first time when i share things with him?

What kind of person does that?

I stand up and look at the file again, leaving it open on top of his desk, i walk out of the office.

He didn't just have information about me, but everyone around me. How did he even manage to gather such personal information?

How long has he had it?

And what does he plan to do with it all?

I walk into the bedroom and sit down, not knowing what to think, or do.

I think about mom and our conversation this morning and wonder if maybe she was right to show concern over our relationship now, despite her unreserved support last night at dinner.

'Eight? That is quite an age difference you have. Your father was only four years older than me, and sometimes, it felt like a lot' she chuckles, but i know she is serious.

'Yeah, but it doesn't really feel like alot when we are together' i respond defensively.

Honestly, i have never really thought it was a source of concern. Infact, i always thought, in terms of maturity, Angelo and i were evenly matched.

Plus i kind of love our age difference.

'You couldn't possibly, not when your relationship is still new, the physical attraction is high, and you are both just basically floating in the clouds with no grip on reality.

But eventually, the dust settles, and it catches up that you are in two different places in life. You clearly have opposing backgrounds and style of life and probably want different things at the moment...and after last night's incident, i must admit, i am a little concerned about the environment you are in" she says over breakfast.

She stops talking when she sees the pained look on my face.

"Arie, i am not trying to discourage you, i just want you to be careful and really think about what you are doing and getting yourself into. Think about what you want and how you picture your future and if he is the type of man that fits in your vision......

And i am not saying it can't work, just that you will need to make alot of sacrifices to overcome the obvious differences and challenges.

But lf this is really what you want, then i will support you and will wish you both the very best' she adds, taking my hand.

It's something to think about and it's making my headache worse.

I sneeze, feeling like my head will just fall off my shoulders at this point.

I think i really caught a cold last night, as Luke predicted. I was hoping i was just tired from all the adrenaline rush and late night moving, but despite spending most of the day in bed resting, i am only feeling worse.

Maybe a hot shower will help.

I don't have anymore clothes here after i packed up all my stuff the other day.

So i walk to Angelo's closet in search of something that will fit me, considering our size difference.

I am neither short or small per se, but Angelo makes me feel and look both next to him.

I focus on his casual clothes, looking for something comfortable to wear for the night while my clothes dry out for tomorrow morning. I will need to go back to my apartment before going to work.

I start easy, picking out a pair of socks. After going through a few things, i decide all his sweats and shorts are big for me at the waist but i keeping looking until i find some compression tights for men, which he probably wears when working out. These look tight enough, and will probably work.

That's another thing that was on my bucket list, watching Angelo work out, and joining him. I imagine he does it alot because he has the body to show for it.

Focus!

I grab a tshirt and sweater and walkout satisfactied with my choices.

I take a long hot shower and dress up quickly, the whole time trying to decide what i will do or say to Angelo when i see him.

I feel betrayed and hurt.

And honestly, just plain confused. I feel like i bit off alot more than i can chew and it's starting to really scare me now.

I make myself comfortable on the bed, no longer feeling hungry from anticipating his return.

I flip through the channels and find a tv news coverage about last nights incident.

Watching and listening to the reporter and eye witness testimonies, i start to feel very anxious, this could have ended up really really badly. It could have easily been Angelo that got hurt.

I picture him lying on the side walk with a bullet through his heart and shift uncomfortably on the bed, i would die if that ever happened.

And so now i feel conflicted between my anger towards him and fear of loosing the only man i have ever loved.

Turns out, i don't have to wait any more for his arrival because few minutes later, i hear movement in the house.

He is home.

*

After passing through the office briefly, then my parent's house and finally the Denning residence to check up on Max who was released from the hospital this morning and also to meet with his father, i can put behind me the most difficult part of the day.

I finally get to go home, even though i have one more thing to conclude before i am free for the night.

"Make yourselves comfortable, i will be down in a minute" I say to the guys, as i make my way upstairs to the bedroom where i know i will find Marianne.

She is lying in bed, her eyes on the tv screen when i walk in. I turn my head to see what she is watching as i walk to her and frown when i see yesterday's incident.

"Hi" I say, sitting on the edge of the bed and kissing her forehead, which i find to be warm.

"Hai yourself' She replies.

"Still feeling bad?" i ask, feeling her body temperature with my hand.

"I think i caught a cold last night" she murmurs hoarsely.

"You see, you shouldn't have come. Now look what has happened" i rebuke her.

"Don't start. I already know i shouldn't have been out too many times last night." she leans back into the pillow with a fustrated sigh.

"Too many times? You went out again after i asked you to go home?"

"No!" she denies quickly, losing color on her face all of a sudden.

"What did you mean then?" I hope she wasn't out and about with Luke at that hour.

"Nothing, just forget it" she avoids my eyes completely, and it gets me even more curious.

He is beginning to be a problem now.

"Marianne?"

"Just let it go!" She sudennly looks at me defiantly.

I sigh, getting off the bed, i unbutton my shirt and pull it out of my pants, taking it off.

"I need to discuss a couple of things with some guys downstairs, it won't take long" i say, walking into the closet.

I change into more comfortable pants and reappear with a tshirt in my hand. I put it on while her eyes stay glued to the tv.

"Stop watching that." i say.

She doesn't reply.

I go to her and sit on the edge of the bed next to her.

"What's wrong?" i ask, capping her cheek. She doesn't seem like herself.

She stares at me with big blue eyes.

"Just thinking" she says faintly.

"About what?"

"Everything..." she murmurs, looking me dead in the eye this time.

The way she says it makes me uneasy, but i will have to pursue this conversation later, after the guys leave.

"Ok. I have some people i want you to meet downstairs. You are going to have a driver from now on" i say.

"A driver? When did WE decide that?" she snaps, emphasising the 'we' to drive her point.

"Today" i say flatly. This decision is not up for negotiation whether she likes it or not.

"I don't need a driver Angelo"

"Marianne, i can't take you to work all the time......"

"You don't need to and i don't expect you to either. I can figure it out, i always have" she snaps.

"So you expect me to just sit back as you 'figure it out'? That makes sense to you?" i equally snap.

I get the whole independent thing she thinks she has got going on, but she over does it and it annoys me, that's not how relationships work.

"I can takecare of myself, i have been doing it for the past five years..so you need to chill" she slurs.

"I get it, and i respect that, but letting someone else care for you doesn't mean you are weak, or make you weak. I am your boyfriend Marianne, doesn't it make sense for me to takecare of you?" i ask calmly, noticing how this conversation is escalating fast.

She doesn't respond but looks away intently at the TV again.

"I have people waiting downstairs. I would appreciate it if you could come down just for a minute so you can meet them." i say, standing up.

I walk out of the room, leaving her still evidently angry.

I wonder what has put her in such a foul mood? We talked on the phone earlier and she couldn't wait for me to get back.

I knew she wouldn't like the idea of having a driver, but i didn't expect that, what ever that was.

With the recent happening, even i have had to succumb to the idea of having security full time. Growing up, because of my father's work and position in society, my siblings and i all had full time security, i hated it.

Somewhere in my twenties i decided to do away with it, except during some profesional engagements and special occasions.

But after last night, I have my whole family on my back over it again. Nick too. And honestly, the thought of having someone to come home too, someone that cares for me makes me want to be a little bit more serious about my own safety.

I get down and talk to the guys over the last few details of our new arrangement.

A few minutes later, Marianne joins us, thankfully.

"Hey.....This is Sam Lamari and Elijah Turner, Sam, Elijah......this is Marianne Wright" i say, squeezing her to my side.

I have known Sam, who is in his mid forties, since i was seventeen years old when he started working for my family. I trust him and know he is really good at his job.

Elijah who i have only known for a couple of years, is in his late twenties but equally good at his job.

Both are professional private security and will be with Marianne more for her safety, than a means to ease her movement.

She, as usual is polite and sweet as they exchange greetings, no sign of the little argument we just had upstairs.

Claire was different, if we differed, the whole world should know it!

"Sam and Elijah will alternate to drive you around. I will give you their contact information which you will need to memorise" i elbow her playfully.

"Ok, i think that's it for the night" i conclude.

"Sure, but what about the camera angles you talked about?" Sam asks.

"Oh yeah...this way" I say, leading the group to my office.

I want to change some of the angles of the surveillance cameras in my apartment now that Mary will be living here, and make it abit more private.

I get first access to the security footage before it gets to my part-time security guys incase i want to delete or alter anypart of the footage. But now, i just want to change certain camera positions.

I move to my desk to open my desktop computer where i can control the angles and zoom in on the shots of the surveillance.

I find on my desk, next to the computer, an open file among the other documents spread out on the desk.

But something catches my eye, it has several pictures of Marianne at what looks like different ages spread out.

This must be the file from Kyan.

But what is it doing out here.

I look up and Marianne is watching me. I feel my heart beat out of my chest.

Shit!

She saw it.

"You know what? Lets takecare of this tomorrow, it's already quite late and might take a while." i say, dismissing the guys.

They say their goodbyes and leave me alone with Marianne.

Well, i guess this explains her mood.

I shake my head abit, standing up straight.

"It's not what it looks like" i start.

"No? Then tell me what it is?" she utters hoarsely.

I hesitate, trying to form the right words in my head.

"Do you want to know what it's looks like to me? What i think? Because i think you are a hypocrite, a lying, manipulative, controlling....." she spits angrily, her face getting even more red with fury.

"Enough, stop! I get it, but i promise you, i didn't open this file. I have never looked at it" i say walking towards her.

"That is really funny, and hard to believe Angelo, then why is it there?"

"I asked for it" i admit.

"Right, then you just decided to put it away without looking at it... I mean yeah, that makes a lot of sense." she snickers.

"It's the truth. I received it the day we had lunch. I had it in my hand when you called that day, but decided i didn't need to look at it because i wanted to get to know you the right way." i explain truthfully.

"You had someone investigate, not just me, but my family and friends, pried into personal information, you had no right to do that, whether you looked at it or not, you crossed a line Angelo" she grumbles.

"You are right, that is not really my place, but it is what it is. I need to know about the people i let into my life and personal space, it's what i have always done for my own protection"

She is not the first, I do it with everyone i want to do business with or when i seriously want to date someone.

She looks at me surprised and irritated.

"And to think the way you acted the other day with Stephanie...."

"I know, i overreacted, but i apologized to you for it already" i maintain.

"Well ok. Then i guess that makes everything alright." she says sarcastically, and turns away.

"What do you want me to say? It's done already, but i swear to you, i didn't look through it." i follow her.

"Marianne!" i turn her around when she starts to walk up the stairs.

"I said Ok..... What else do you want me to do? applaud you" she snaps.

"Believe me..i want you to believe me"

"Fine, i do" she says sardonically.

"Then will you stop being so fucking mad at me already?" i sigh.

"Geez, Angelo, You want to control and manage everything, including my feelings, honestly, you are asking for alot" she laments.

"Cut me some slack will you. I am trying my best here." i start to feel annoyed.

"I am trying too, but all this stuff going on.. It's a lot and i don't know how to deal with it...."

"What are you trying to say?"

"It's just alot of changes you expect from me" she says quietly.

"I am making changes too. I had rules and routines that i followed for years. But i am making adjustments, because i want to be with you, because you are worth every change i make. I'ld do anything for you" i say truthfully.

She stares at me, and i feel her resolve begin to break as she makes a choice.

I don't touch her even though i want to, we just stare at each other, as she tries to judge my sincerity.

"Ok" she whispers finally.

"Ok what?"

"I believe you. I'll trust you..and i want to be with you too" she says, her voice breaking off at the end.

I nod.

"When did you last eat?" i ask.

Since she is not feeling well, she needs to make sure she is eating well atleast.

"I am not really hungry" she sighs.

I take that as " a long time ago"

"That's not what i asked." i say, walking to the kitchen.

She follows and sits down by the kitchen counter and sneezes.

Shit! She is really sick, i counted on spending some 'quality' time with her tonight, but in her state, i guess i am not getting some tonight.

What do you make for a person with a cold to make them feel better? i scan through the fridge, and then the pantry.

"There is still plenty of food that Mario made this morning." She says, watching me.

"Am i not supposed to make you a soup or something" i ask seriously and she giggles.

A short little chuckle that makes me stop and look at her. I haven't heard that sound in a while and it warms my heart.

"I can do it" she offers.

"Sit down, i got it"

I make a soup following the instructions on the packet to a tee and give it to her, then i sit down to eat my own dinner from the left over food.

Mary eats my soup with some bread without complaining or making a face or anything like that, so i assume it's adequate.

"What happened with Eric?" she asks sudennly, and it catches me by surprise.

"It was dealt with" i say with finality.

She won't like what i did.

"How? What happened with him?" she eyes me curiously.

"He won't be a problem to you anymore, don't worry about him" i say dismissively and she lets it go, surprisingly.

"What were you up to last night?" i ask, the thought has been lingering in my head since she brought it up.

She looks at me briefly before responding.

"You don't let things go do you?" she asks rhetorically.

"No" i admit shamelessly.

"You will just overreact if i tell you" she decides after watching me.

"When have i ever overreacted?" i ask mockingly.

She rolls her eyes and sighs.

"After we got home from dinner, I had just gotten out of the shower when i remembered that i didn't take the morning pill and then i panicked...That's before i realised you already sent it" she says, holding the spoon to her face as if to hide from me.

"So i went out looking for one, but i kind of forgot to dry my hair and even though we rounded the city, most pharmacies where closed or didn't have it, ironically" she bites the end of her spoon, anticiptating my response.

Rounded the city? That's quite an exageration.

I look at her calmly, stressing my point that i don't overreact. Anymore.

"So you were careless about your welfare and then went to ask the boy next door for help in the middle of the night?....Why didn't you call me"

Her mouth drops open into a 'Are you dumb' look and i suppress a laugh.

I want to put things in that mouth.

"My phone Angelo, i believe i mentioned that i forgot it here." she speaks through her teeth.

"And it was so urgent that you risked your health over it?"

"I panicked ok....and yes it was urgent" she bites her lip, the action drawing my eyes there again.

We share a silence.

"Would it be so bad?" i ask thoughtfully.

"What would?"

"If you got pregnant?" She is taken aback by my question and she swallows hard, her eyes widening.