Dawn arrived but sleep never did.

Not to me.

Throughout the night, I did nothing but reflect on my actions. The events of the past weeks flooded my memory. The moment Vanessa Carter came to my life to this moment. Everything came rushing in my head.

Last month, I kept on asking myself as to why I tried so hard to fulfill her simplest of dreams. I kept on asking what benefit it would do to me if I fulfill even one of those dreams. I kept on asking myself why I need to see her smile, laugh or look so content.

Back then, I keep pushing the answers at the back of my mind. I keep on denying the truth to myself. I keep telling myself that the answer to those questions would always be, "I don't know."

But in reality, I do know. I have known the answers for a long time. The organ that I refused to listen to seemed to now take the reins. My heart knows the answer because the heart always knows what it wants. My heart keeps on giving me answers, sending messages, yet my brain refused to accept those answers.

I love her.

I have been for a while now.

I have been in love with her all throughout our adventures.

And probably, I fell for her the moment her eyes clashed with mine the first time.

Those piercing green eyes never seized to amaze me. They are always dancing with different emotions. And the first time our eyes mirrored each other was no exception. Her eyes are always open for me to read what's going on in her beautiful mind. Her soul will always be bare for me to see through those eyes.

Her set of eyes is one of the many things I love about her.

And then, there's her soft lips.

As she lay asleep beside me, I took that advantage and repeatedly lightly kissing her luscious lips, careful not to wake her up. I lost count on how many times I kissed her because every time anxiety starts to creep in, I would always resolve kissing her.

It's been like that the whole night. I never slept at all.

How can I?

How could I sleep comfortably, knowing that she will be gone the moment we go back? How can I sleep, knowing full well that someone is already waiting, waiting to take her from my arms and bring her to back to her rightful place?

I can't let her go even if I have to.

But I have to.

And I am preparing myself for the pain because for the first time after my father's death, my heart will be broken once more. I mentally cursed at the unfairness of it all. I fell in love for the first time, experienced love for the first time, but that feeling will be for naught because I would have to let her go. And fuck I know it's going to be painful once she left.

When she stirred, I realized that my contemplation, my reflection, is over. The dreaded morning has arrived.

*****

The drive was tensed and my mind is going overdrive as we ride back from Tagaytay to Manila. Kuya Chris, the taxi driver we called to take us back, did nothing to soothe my nerves in any way.

Sitting beside me is the girl I feel hard for and she has no idea what's in store for her once we got back. Although her tense shoulders proved to me that she can feel my mood, she hadn't really bothered to ask yet.

And then, we got stuck in traffic.

The tension in the cab seemed to have affected everyone because even Kuya Chris stopped telling his stories and just stayed silent.

When I heard someone exhaled aloud, I knew I'd be down for some explanations.

A hand touched my arm, and I suddenly felt myself exhale in relief.

"Tell me, what's bothering you?" she asked, trying to soothe my nerves with each stroke of her hand on my arm and shoulders.

I looked in her eyes, and I know I could not lie. Not to her. Especially not to her.

"I have to tell you something," I said seriously.

"I'm all ears."

"The situation changed," I started. "Whatever's waiting for us at the end of this road, your whole perspective will change. And I will probably change in your eyes. But before that happens, I want to confess something to you."

I cringed a bit. This is not how I pictured a romantic confession would be but it doesn't matter because something could be worse.

"For the first time in my life I have experienced such intensity in my heart. For the first time in my life, Nana, grandma, and mom aren't the only women important to me. I finally found someone who will understand me, and who will not take any crap from me. I found you."

"Me?" she said in a hopeful, but confused eyes.

"Yes, you," I took a deep breath. "The first time we met was the first time I realized that everything I need had finally arrived."

I took another deep breath and opened my mouth. "I lov―"

"Is that the Max's?"

My eyes widened and followed her gaze until my eyes landed on a pair of guys, each clad in a tuxedo as a pair of sunglasses hide their eyes. My blood drained from my body as I realized that during all those craps I said earlier, I failed to notice that we have arrived back in our hotel. And true to his words, the king and his guards have arrived in the country.

There's no escape now.

I turned to see Carter looking curiously at me.

"Please," I croaked as her eyes shifted from mine to the two men in question.

When more men came from the hotel, realization finally dawned on her.

"Oh my gods..." she gasped. Tears started to fill her eyes as she continued to stare out the windshield.

"Please," I begged, not really know what I'm pleading for.

A tear escaped her eye, and another, and another. She looked at me with those betrayed looks in her eyes and managed to squeak "why?" in between her sobs.

"I didn't know, I swear I didn't know at first," I managed to say.

"At first?" she shrieked before bolting out of the cab.

When she went out, four guards came forward and suddenly swarmed her.

Hastily pulling out some bills to pay the driver, I followed to suit. Upon entering the premise of the hotel, the four guards that surrounded her earlier moved back and gave us some space.

"So, everything was a lie," she mumbled to no one.

"No!" I exclaimed, shaking my head wildly at her, but she wasn't listening.

"So, everything was a lie?" she asked now looking at me as tears spilled nonstop from her eyes, breaking my heart a thousand times. I felt my own hot tears rolling down my cheeks as I desperately tried to explain the whole thing. "Every word, every action, everything you did for me was a lie!"

"It's not a lie please," I begged once more. "Everything we've experienced, everything I said, everything we did were all true to me."

She laughed humorlessly, "how can they be real? You knew all along about me, and you knew that this will happen. You were just playing along, weren't you?"

"Carter..." I tried again, but that only ripped another sob from her.

And in that moment did the king finally made an appearance.

"Your majesty," I said, forcing myself to bow.

A gasp came from Vanessa before giving me an accuse glare. "How could you?"

She then turned her head to her father. "Father."

"Laura, Mr. Westwood, come up to your room and we will be discussing these things in private."

"You knew each other," it's more of a statement than a real question, "You were just following orders?"

"I didn't."

"Then how the fuck did you know each other?" she yelled.

"Laura!" came from the booming voice of he father. "We will discuss this upstairs."

"No! You both are going to tell me now," she yelled before falling to her knees. "I can't believe I was so stupid as to think that you could actually have feelings for me."

I just sunk to my knees as I watch her try to pick up herself. I watch her as she forced a sob down before wiping her tears. And when she looked at me, those green eyes that were always filled with emotions were now devoid of any.

I watched as she stands and calmly walk away. Everyone in the hall went quiet as we watch the princess walk gracefully, but when she was a few feet from the rest of us, she dashed and took a hard right.

No one expected her to do such a thing so it took a full ten seconds before the guards scrambled to follow her. I was dimly aware of the king told her guards to secure the perimeter because I followed her.