《Destined Stars》10. Anxiety
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It's Tuesday and today I have gym class. I'm seriously not looking forward to it. Sky texted me this morning informing me she has a doctor's appointment this afternoon so I'm stuck in gym class by myself. Great.
I change into a plain white tank top, cotton shorts and running trainers. I tie my blonde hair back into a messy bun, with small blonde strands framing my face.
The girls changing room is full of loud chatter, and I couldn't feel more alone -- so disliked by all the girls here.
"She's so pale, she looks like she belongs in a Twilight film." I turn my head and I see a group of girls giggling in the corner.
I don't care what people think about me. I'm happy with my appearance, and if they have a problem with it, then screw them.
I stayed indoors most of my life, not because I was homeschooled or the daughter of rock legends. When my father died, my childhood was filled with loneliness. My mother's struggles kept me indoors -- locked away in my room day after day.
I didn't even have any real friends to play with. Nevertheless, I spent my free time reading novels, and watching musicals and then I gradually became a music lover. I also gained weight from staying in so much. By the age of fifteen, my mother persuaded me to use our home gym.
I'm still not a perfect weight for my age -- like most girls in this changing room -- but I'm happy with myself and that's all I care about.
By the time I'm ready, I turn towards the doors when I walk straight into a tall blonde. She's beautiful. Perfect figure, glowing skin, full lips, big brown eyes and pin-straight, long hair.
She is any guy's wet dream.
I recognise this girl, she was the one who warned me about Reese the day he was coming over to my house.
"Oh my God, watch where you're going freak." she spits in my face.
Rude.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were standing there." my voice is unusually small.
"So you're saying it's my fault you walked into me?" her perfect eyebrow raises and she crosses her arms over her big chest. Does she stuff toilet tissue down her bra or something?
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"No, I just didn't see you." I huff. My voice was thick with sarcasm and I grimace.
Shit.
Why do I make bad situations so much worse for myself?
She laughs under her breath. "Well use your fucking eyes, bitch." her brown orbs look murderous but I don't cower. This girl doesn't scare me one bit.
"Ashley let's go, Mrs Peters is waiting for us."
The blonde follows her two minion girls waiting near the lockers and I'm left alone, I take a deep breath, composing myself.
I can do this.
An hour of gym class goes by and we play a game of dodgeball.
I can't do this.
It was no surprise to me, I was picked last for the team and of course, I was everyone's target. I had to sit on the bench for most of the game. The side of my face stung from where an orange ball made contact with the skin. I held back the tears, I won't let anyone see me cry.
After the third game ended, I notice the boy's team filter inside the room to play beside us girls.
I feel anxious as hell.
Our teacher blew her whistle and gave us a ten-minute break while she left the room. I sat on the bench, twiddling my thumbs and I notice the blonde girl and her minions talking to a few guys in the corner of the room.
Her gaze snaps to mine and she smiles wickedly. She then leans into the broad blond guy who keeps harassing me ever since my first day here, they seem to be whispering about something important.
I look away, not wanting to be caught staring. I wish Sky was here so I don't have to sit here all alone while all the other kids have friends to talk to.
By the time our teacher came back, we all lined up again to play another game of dodgeball. I gave up pretty easily when five orange balls hit my body in the first three seconds. Lucky me.
By the end of class, I sigh with relief. I walk into the changing rooms behind all the girls. I sit down, tying my shoes when I feel eyes on me.
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'Her legs and butt are huge those shorts.' I hear a girl giggle.
Red dots blind my vision.
That's when I snap.
I turn and glare at a smiling skinny girl, my face heating up in embarrassment. "Pay attention to your own fucking body! Don't look at mine!" I scream at the top of my lungs.
Her smile drops and she looks away, the blood drains from her face.
What the fuck is wrong with all these girls in this school? They should be supporting each other instead of making other girls feel like shit.
Everyone's eyes are on me. I dress slowly, not wanting to draw any more attention. Inside I feel a burning rage, wanting to explode.
Thankfully all the girls left the changing room and I sigh in exhaustion. I pull my sweaty tank top over my head. I'm wearing a grey sports bra and small shorts. I let my hair fall down my back and I start to walk toward the showers.
I hear a door open and close behind me, so I hurry into the shower to change but stop dead in my tracks when I listen to a male voice call out. "I know you're in here baby doll."
What the...?
My eyes grow wide, I glance behind the thin white curtain between the showers and the girl's changing room and fear replaces my curiosity.
The guy who was talking to Ashley, the same guy who poured chocolate pudding all over me on my first day and called me names is looking around the room, jaw clenched and angry.
My blood runs ice cold.
"Come out, come out, little princess. You won't escape me this time..." I can picture his evil smirk, taunting me.
Tears fill my eyes, and my arms and legs start to shake violently as I push myself back to the wall. I breathe in and out, trying to calm myself down as I hear approaching footsteps.
Oh, God.
Suddenly, the curtain is yanked open and the dirty blond-haired guy smirks at me devilishly. His navy eyes are darker than usual. "I thought I heard you breathing, princess."
I attempt to scream, hoping someone somewhere hears me. However, he is quicker. He slams me to the wall, covering my face with his rough palm.
My skull hits the white tiled wall and I whimper from the pain. He chuckles darkly, I can smell the strong, masculine scent of his aftershave as it burns my nostrils. He looks down at me, dark eyes that promised pain.
I attempt to scream again, struggling to move under his firm grip. I'm not strong enough to break free from him.
His hard body is flush over mine, and I'm highly aware I'm half-naked right now. I feel nausea build in my throat. I'm terrified, my breathing becoming erratic. My throat is burning and fat tears run down from my eyes, they fall into his hand that's still covering my mouth.
"Please," I mumble with desperation in my voice even though I know it's useless.
He smirks wider. "Haven't got a smart mouth now have you?"
Asshole.
I can't let him do this, whatever he plans to do.
Survival reflex kicks in and I knee him hard in the groin, causing him to groan and slip back onto the floor.
I yell as loud as I possibly can, pushing him away from me. I fall over, grasping my knee on the rough, cold floor and he grabs my ankle. The pressure of his hand hurts and I scream again, kicking my foot out.
My nails scrape the floor, my arms and legs flailing. "Stop moving, you little bitch."
He grabs hold of my legs as I push my body around to face him. I cry out in pain and terror when I know there is no escaping this guy. He won't give up.
He's a quarterback, broad and muscular. What else can I do to escape?
I have to find a way to escape him, I can't let him get me. Who knows what he'll do to me after I kicked him in his privates? What is he planning to do to me? Oh God, I can't think about the horrific thoughts swirling in my mind.
So I use my voice, I scream and scream and scream for help.
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