"Okay, here's more cosmos and chips and salsa," I said, setting the platter down next to my jacuzzi. "Yay!" Janet cheered, swimming over to grab her glass. "Mariah?" she asked and Mariah nodded. Janet handed Mariah her drink as I walked into the jacuzzi, sitting down on the steps.

I relaxed against one of the jets letting it beat against my back, "Mm, this is just what I need," I said, closing my eyes, leaning my head back. It was true. I was so stressed from work and it didn't help that I was receiving threats from some anonymous person. My mind had never been so over the place.

Everything was affecting my physical and mental health. My appetite is gone most of the time, I can't sleep, and I just feel drained and worn out from everything. "You okay?" Janet asked, knocking me out of my head. I opened my eyes and brought my head back down, "Yeah-yeah," I said, giving a small smile.

"You're not," Janet said, sipping her cosmo. "Yeah, we know you missy. We know when something's up," Mariah said, giving me a skeptic look. I wanted to tell them what was going on but I couldn't. This was my problem and I didn't want to put that burden on other people.

I chuckled a little, "No, I'm fine really. Just a little stressed with work. These next few months are going to be crazy for me. And Michael, he's going to be in the studio all day and night along with filming things," I said looking at Janet with my eyebrows raised. They were going to start filming the 'Scream' music video in May and I was super excited.

"So, it's going to be rough and I'm trying to figure out how not to lose it," I said with a small chuckle. They nodded, understanding where I was coming from. "I don't even feel human sometimes you know?" I asked, "I feel like I'm just work, work, work. I barely have time to myself. I feel like a ticking bomb that's just going to explode one of these days," I finished.

"Aw, Ash," Janet said, swimming over to me to hug me. Mariah followed suit and next thing I knew I was crying. "Hey, it's okay, let it out," Mariah said, rubbing my arm to comfort me. "I'm sorry," I said sniffling. "It is more than okay. You sound like you're going through something, it's totally okay," Janet added.

I nodded, "I just have so much going on in my life right and I'm dealing with so much shit internally, it's breaking me. I just feel like someone always wants something from me and whatever I do it's either not it or not enough. I'm worked to the literal ground, my last job in Paris totally threw me for a fucking loop, and someone who is-" I said catching myself, "and I-I just I don't know what to do. The media breathes down my fucking neck. I can't even go to the grocery store anymore without being swarmed. I feel like I'm suffocating."

"Hey, we've been there, me and Mariah. We know exactly what you're going through and unfortunately that's what comes along with being successful and add fame to that? Pshh," Janet said, waving her hand. "And the level of fame you're on because of not only being a model but the fame from being with Michael, I can't imagine what it must feel like for you but don't beat yourself up so hard.You're strong. You are so strong. You'll get through this," Mariah added.

I nodded, gratefully at the both of them for being there for me. "Does Michael know how you feel?" Janet asked. I shook my head, "No. He's my escape from my reality so if I told him, I think I'd lose that escape. I can just see him and all my worries and troubles go out the door. I don't want to lose that. He's the only thing making me happy right now in this chaotic world," I said sniffling.

"I understand," Janet said, hugging me a little tighter, "I'm sorry you're going through this. I wish I could help alleviate some stress, but I have a plate of my own." Mariah nodded, "Me too, but you already know my situation. I'm surprised I could even come out tonight," Mariah said and we all chuckled.

"No, just you guys listening is a big help. I'm glad you guys are here. I'm sorry for just breaking down in front of you guys though," I said, wiping the tears from my eyes. "Girl, if you say sorry one more time! We told you it's okay! It's best if you let it out. You shouldn't hold that in. I'm sure you already hold enough in," Janet said and I nodded.

"Yeah, you can come to either of us anytime you need us. We'll always be here for you," Mariah said, smiling at me. I put my arms around them and hugged them tight, "Thank you guys. I don't know what I'd do without the both of you," I said appreciatively. "You'd go crazy," Janet said and we all laughed.

As we laughed, I heard my back door slide close. We turned and saw Michael walking over. "Shit," I said, wiping my eyes. "We got you," Janet whispered and Mariah nodded. He walked over with a smile on his face. "Hi Mike," Janet said as he neared closer. "Hi Michael!" Mariah said cheerfully. "Hey Dunk, Mariah!" he said cheerfully.

I felt his eyes on me and I knew he'd read me like a book as soon as I faced him. "Hi Smiles," he said softly. I took a deep breath and turned around, "Hey baby!" I said trying to sound normal. I smiled at him and I knew he was indeed reading me. He gave me a smile as he crouched down and wiggled his finger at me to come to him. He tapped his lips indicating he wanted a kiss.

I swam over with a smile on my face. I placed my hands on the ledge and pushed myself up and out of the jacuzzi to kiss him. As I leaned in to kiss him, he grabbed my face, stopping me to look at me. "Why are you crying?" he asked. Well, damn.

"What?" I asked, trying to play it off. "You were crying. I know you. What's wrong?" he asked. I sighed and Janet stepped in. "Nothing, you need to worry about Mike," she said, rolling her eyes. He looked away from me, keeping his hands on my face. He stared at her for a few seconds and then looked back at me. "What's wrong?" he whispered, his eyes pleading.

"Nothing, I was probably just overreacting. I'm fine now. Janet and Mariah helped me," I said smiling at him. He searched my eyes back and forth before he gave me a slight nod and kissed me.

He pulled back, "You sure you're okay? You know I just want to be there for you if something's wrong," he whispered so Janet and Mariah couldn't hear. I nodded and gave him another kiss, "Yeah, I'm fine now."

He smiled a little, "Promise?" he asked, taking one hand from my face and holding out his pinky finger. I smiled, hooking mine with his, "Promise."

He nodded and let go of my face, letting me sit back in the warm water. "How long have you guys been out here?" he asked, looking around at all of us. "A few hours," I said looking at Mariah and Janet as they nodded.

"You guys are gonna be all pruney," Michael said, making us laugh. "Yeah, yeah whatever," I said, splashing him a little. He scoffed and splashed me back making me laugh. "How much longer are you guys gonna be?" he asked. "Until the sun comes up. Now leave," Janet said smartly.

"Don't I just have the sweetest baby sister?" Michael asked sarcastically. "Yep," Janet said, sipping her drink. Mariah and I chuckled at their sibling banter as Michael shook his head, playfully.

"Probably another hour or so," I said, answering him. "Yeah, we gotta get home. Tomorrow is lover's day," Janet said as I looked at Michael and he winked at me. "Yay! Can't wait," Mariah said sarcastically. We laughed at her and I nudged her playfully, "Call up Derek," I said, wiggling my eyebrows.

Mariah and Derek Jeter have started becoming real close friends and she admitted to me she liked him. They would make a great couple, but one problem: The powerful Tommy Motolla.

"Shut up!" she hissed under her breath, nodding at Michael. He wasn't even paying attention because he was looking up at the sky admiring the stars. "He didn't even hear me and if he did, he wouldn't say anything. Right, Michael?" I asked and he looked at me like a deer in headlights, "Huh?" he asked.

"What I tell you," I said and Mariah and Janet both laughed. "Nothing Joker," I said and he shrugged. He stood up, "I'm going to take a shower and find something to eat. If I don't see you guys before you leave, love you Dunk and goodnight Mariah," he said softly. "Goodnight!" Mariah said sweetly. "Love you too Mike!" Janet said.

He pointed at me, "I'll see you later," and I nodded. "We'll be in soon," I said as he walked away. He gave me a thumbs up and walked into the house.

"He really does read you like a book," Mariah said and I nodded, "I told you." We relaxed in the jacuzzi again, watching the night sky.

"So Ash, what are you and Michael doing tomorrow for Valentine's day?" Janet asked. I swallowed my cosmo, "Nothing too extravagant, just a dinner probably since my birthday is three days later."

Janet nodded, "Oh that's right! Your birthday is coming up! 26, how does that feel!" she asked and I put my hand up. "I don't even want to talk about it. I'm just not going to acknowledge my age," I said and they laughed at me, "I don't even want to grow up."

"Okay, Mike," Janet said and I pushed her playfully. "What are you doing for your birthday?" Mariah asked. "I don't know. Michael asked if I wanted to go somewhere to travel, but my schedule doesn't allow it, so we can't. He said he'd come up with something so we'll see. My family always throws me a barbeque so I have that too. You guys are welcome to come," I said.

"I'd love to! I just gotta see if Mr. Grinch will allow me," Mariah said sarcastically. "It'll get better," I said, rubbing her arm and she nodded.

Soon after, Janet and Mariah left for the night and I was in the kitchen washing our dishes and tidying up. Michael waltzed in and I laughed at him, "What are you doing?" I asked. "Dancing," he said nonchalantly, going over to the fridge. "You're always dancing," I teased.

"I can't help it. I probably came out dancing," he said, moving his body making me laugh. "There's leftovers in the fridge if you want that. I didn't eat much," I said, drying my hands. "What'd you guys have?" he asked. "Shrimp tacos," I said and his face lit up as he grabbed them out of the fridge.

"Did you have fun tonight?" he asked and I nodded, "Yeah, I did," I said smiling to myself, "I always love when I can get together with Mariah and Janet." Michael nodded, "Good, good," he said sitting down at the bar to eat.

I grabbed him a bottle of water and slid it over to him. "I'm gonna hop in the shower," I said walking around the island to head upstairs. As I passed Michael, he smoothly grabbed my hand and pulled me into him. "Now do you wanna tell me why you were crying?" he asked softly.

I sighed, "It was nothing, really. I just told them how stressed I am and it overwhelmed me," I said, simplifying it for him. He caressed my cheek with his thumb, "Why are you stressed?" he asked. "Work," I said not wanting to tell him everything, "I just have so much on my plate. I don't know how I'm going to do it all." He pulled me in for a hug, cradling my head. In this moment, I felt like I could finally breathe being in his arms, yet it made me sad to think about where I was at mentally at this point in time and it made me cry. Again.

Michael realized I was crying again and hugged me tighter, "Hey, hey, it's okay. It's gonna be okay, Smiles. I promise you," he said reassuringly. I nodded and snuggled into him more as I still cried. Michael whispered comforting words in my ear to calm me down as I cried on him.

Finally I regained my composure and slowly pulled away. Michael grabbed my cheeks, wiping my tears for me. "I'm sorry," I said, pouting at him and he shook his head. "There's no need to be sorry. Ever," he whispered to me. I nodded and he placed a kiss on my forehead making me smile. "You're going through something right now and that's normal. We all go through things. Some people are worse than others," he said pointing at himself and I smiled a little, "and whatever it might be, just know it's only temporary. It'll pass. And when you're ready to tell me what's bothering you, I'll be there."

I hugged him again, "Thank you," I whispered in his ear. The notes popped into my mind and I remembered how the previous ones threatened me if I didn't leave him and I just know I can't because I need him. At this moment, I realized that I absolutely could not live without him. I don't know what I'd ever do if I lost him.

"Promise me you'll never leave me," I whispered, feeling tears brimming my eyes. I felt Michael's body tense a little. He pulled back and looked at me with a slight frown, but when he saw my tears, his face softened. "I'd never leave you. I couldn't even bear the thought of losing you, ever. And don't you doubt that for a second," he said seriously, "I need you. Probably more than you need me."

He pulled me in for another hug, cradling my head again, "I'd never leave you," he whispered again and I hugged him tighter, letting out a deep breath. He held me for a while until I stopped crying thinking about the threats I had received.

I pulled away and looked at him. "I hate that you're feeling like this. I hate seeing you so distraught and overwhelmed. I wish I could just take that away from you," he said, tucking my hair behind my ear. "Just you being here for me helps," I said smiling. He smiled back, "Good now please stop crying before you make me cry."

I chuckled at him. "And the soon to be birthday girl shouldn't be crying!" he exclaimed and I giggled at him. "You're right," I said, throwing my hair back, "No more." He high fived me, "There's the Smiles I know," he said smiling at me.

"Taco?" he asked, holding up the shrimp tacos. I shook my head, "No, I'm good baby thank you." He shrugged at me, "You're missing out," he said, taking a bite, humming at the taste. As he chewed, I saw him eye me up and down. He wiped his mouth and gestured for me to come closer to him.

"What?" I asked, stepping up to him again. He untied my cover up, letting it fall to the floor. "This is new. I like this bikini," he said, biting his lip. I threw my head back in laughter, "You are..too much," I said, shaking my head at him. "Sexy. Very sexy. God, I have a beautiful girlfriend," he said, eyeing my body.

"Let me go before your hands are all over me," I said, picking up my cover up and turning to walk to my bedroom. "You say that like it's a bad thing!" he yelled from behind me. I turned around smiling at him over my shoulder as I walked down the foyer to see his eyes fixated on my ass.

I flipped my hair overlooking my makeup in the mirror. I grabbed my lipstick and puckered my lips as I started to apply it.

"Wow," I heard softly from behind me. I looked in the mirror and saw Michael standing there smiling at me. I blushed, looking down. I heard his footsteps nearing me and I looked up in the mirror at him. He placed his hands on my hips and kissed my cheek softly making me smile.

"What can I do for you, Mr. Jackson?" I asked playfully. "Nothing, I just wanted to ask how much longer," he said softly. I turned around in his arms, "Give me like...15 more minutes. I need to get dressed and pack my little bag." He nodded at me, "Okay."

I put all of my makeup away and tidied up my bathroom before I walked out with Michael following behind me. I went into my closet to pick out an outfit. "Should I wear something nice but comfy?" I asked from the closet. Michael walked to the door frame, "Yeah, you can. I'd bring an extra sweatshirt for later on. It'll get cold."

"Okay," I said, going through my color coded closet. I picked out an outfit and added some jewelry to accessorize. I grabbed my jacket, purse, and shoes and headed downstairs. I walked in the kitchen and saw a boxed bouquet of red roses from Venus Et Fleur and a gift bag next to it.

"Michael," I said softly in shock, setting my shoes down on the floor. I looked over at him and he was smiling brightly at me. I made my way towards him and hugged him. "These are beautiful. Thank you so much," I said looking over at them again.

"You're welcome," he said, smiling at my face, "Come. Open your gift," he added, leading me over to the counter. He handed me the bag, smiling. I grabbed it and pulled out the letter inside.

I flipped it over and saw it folded with a red heart sticker on it. I looked up at Michael who was chuckling. "You are so cute," I said laughing as I peeled the sticker off. I opened the letter and it read,

To my dearest Smiles,

As I'm sitting here writing you this letter, you are fast asleep on my chest. I woke up early as I seem to do on the days we can sleep in, and instead of getting frustrated about it, I glanced down at you, saw how peaceful you looked and smiled. How can I possibly be frustrated when I'm lucky enough to wake up next to a woman I am so in love with? I quietly grabbed my notepad, because the last thing I wanted to do was wake you from your peaceful sleep, and I felt so overcome with love that I decided to write you this letter.

As you lay your head on my chest, I lay here and wonder what did I do to get so lucky to have found you. You are the one that has shown me the true meaning of love and what it feels like to be in peace. There is no other person in this world that could have done that for me.

In the midst of my loneliness and longing, in the middle of being so alone in a place where no one seemed to care, you came to me. You found me there and you lifted me up and gave me hope. You gave me the kind of love that I have never received from anyone before. By you keeping me wrapped in your loving arms, I feel so secure. Now that I know you are the one for me, I want to offer you all the happiness the world could possibly give.