I walked into my hotel room after a very long and exhausting day. I couldn't wait to take a shower and just knock out.

"Smiles! I'm heading to my room. There's an envelope for you. I'll put it on the coffee table!" Wes yelled out as I set down my bag in the bedroom. I walked out in the living room where he was. "Okay, thank you Wes. Goodnight," I said, walking over to the coffee table. "See you tomorrow," he said, closing the door.

I picked up the manila envelope. I frowned in confusion because it didn't have a return address just where I was staying while I was in London. Something about it felt uneasy though. I was scared to open it.

I opened it and pulled out a white card with a message written on it. It read, "I'm sorry you had to find out this way. I just want to protect you from getting hurt again. Call me when you get this. -Aiden."

I frowned. What was Aiden sending me and how did he know where I was? And more importantly, what the hell was he talking about?

I looked in the envelope and there were pictures in it. My heart started racing as I dug my hand inside to grab them. I turned them around and I started shaking at what I was seeing.

Tears rolled down my face as I looked at the pictures over and over. There were pictures of Michael at dinner with Lisa Marie Presley and must I add they looked very cosy, leaning into each other, laughing, and smiling.

My heart shattered and I wiped my tears angrily as I picked up the phone to call Aiden. "Hello?" he answered. "WHERE DID YOU GET THESE PICTURES?" I screamed over the phone and I heard him sigh, "I'm sorry, Smiles," he said sadly.

"No-no! You don't get to call me that!" my voice croaked as I started crying, feeling heartbroken. "I'm sorry you had to find out this way, but I wanted to save you from another heartbreak."

How did he know Michael and I were dating? "What do you mean?" I asked, trying to play being oblivious. "I know you, Ash. You like Michael and he's not worth getting into a relationship with if he entertains other women." I internally sighed, so he didn't know.

I started crying, "How do I know if these are real? You could've photoshopped them!" I exclaimed. "No, Ash, they're real," he said and by the tone of his voice I could tell he was forreal.

It went silent as I cried to myself, "Ashley, I'm sorry," he said once again and I wiped my tears, "What do you have to be sorry for?"

"That you have to go through this once again. Do you need me? I can come see you?" he said, sounding hopeful. I scoffed, "Don't think because of this I'm going to run back in your arms Aiden. You broke my heart too, remember?" I spat bitterly.

"I know that, but we can be friends at least. Didn't you get my gifts? I've been trying to get in touch with you since your birthday." So the roses and vinyl were from him.

"That was you?" I asked. "Yeah," he said and I knew he was smiling a little. "Why?" I asked. He sighed, "Isn't it obvious? I still love you. And I miss you. I beat myself up everyday thinking about what I did to you. I'm trying to redeem myself."

I scoffed again, "So you think redeeming yourself is by sending me these photos?'' He sighed again, "No, I didn't mean it like that-," he said before I cut him off. "You know what, I don't care. I'm tired of going through this cycle of heartbreak. I'm done. Bye Aiden," I said before I hung up abruptly.

I looked down at the pictures again and started crying. The phone rang and I stared at it. I picked it up on the last ring, "Hello?" I answered, wiping my tears. "Hi baby," I heard his soft voice cheerfully, "I miss you," he added.

I didn't answer, because my emotions were all over the place. "Smiles?" he said over the phone and I sniffled, "I'm here." It went silent and I could tell he knew something was wrong. "What's wrong? What happened?" he asked, concerned. I licked my bottom lip, "I don't know. You tell me," I said curtly.

"Okay, something is definitely wrong. What is it?" he asked back. "So you're going to play dumb?" I asked back, scoffing. "Play dumb? What-what are you talking about?"

"Okay fine. I guess I'll bring it up," I said, wiping a tear. "Bring what up? Baby, what's going on?" he asked. "You don't get to call me that," I said angrily. The audacity of him.

"Ashley, WHAT is going on," he exclaimed loudly. I sighed, feeling tears cloud my eyes again, "Guess what I received today?"

"What?" he asked. "Some pictures...of you. You and Lisa Marie Presley," I spat. It went silent on his end and I scoffed, "So, they are real. You're cheating on me?" I asked back as tears rolled down my cheeks.

"NO! No! Baby, no!" he said, raising his voice. "Who is she then?" I asked and he sighed, "She's just a friend. I promise. There's nothing going on between us. I promise you!" he exclaimed as his voice was shaky.

"You looked pretty cosy in the pictures," I said coldly. "It's not what it looks like! We met through a mutual friend! I listened to some of her music. She's trying to get into the music industry! I promise you! That's all!" he confessed desperately. I scoffed, "Her dad was fucking Elvis. She doesn't need help getting into the music industry. She's the princess of Rock n Roll for crying out loud! I may be a lot of things, but stupid is not one of them, Michael!" I spat bitterly.

"Baby, it's not what you think! I promise! I love you! I would never do that to you! You're the love of my life!" he said as his voice cracked and I knew he was on the verge of tears.

"Are you still in contact with her?" I asked, wiping more tears. "Yes, but we've talked only a few times. She's been there as a friend while you've been away! We're just friends! I promise you, Smiles!" he pleaded. I looked taken back. Is he serious? "So you hang out with her when I'm away?" I asked.

He sighed, "One time. The dinner and that was because I was lonely. You work so much. What am I supposed to do when you leave for months on end?" I shook my head, "Michael, you act like I leave willingly. It's my job! I have to! I don't want to! Being with you made leaving home a thousand times more difficult!" I exclaimed back.

He didn't say anything. "Do you have feelings for her?" I asked, hurt. I heard him sigh, "No, but she's told me she has feelings for me but I turned her down. I told her I love you and that she and I could only be friends."

"I can't believe you," I whispered, choking up, "Aiden was right. You are entertaining other women." It went silent. "You're talking to Aiden? The guy who broke your heart!?" he asked in disbelief. "You're no different. You're breaking my heart right now befriending a woman who you used to have a crush on!"

"Don't you ever compare me to him," he said angrily, "I told you! Nothing is going on between us! I love you and only you! I would NEVER hurt you! That's not me! Hurting you would be like hurting myself!" he exclaimed desperately.

"God, why does this keep happening to me?" I said on the phone but I meant it to myself. "Nothing is happening, Ashley. I would never cheat on you," he said as his voice cracked. "This just proves that all men are the same," I said, shaking my head. "No, Ashley. All men are not the same. I am NOT Aiden."

"You're right, but they sure are alike. I'm so tired of going through this repeated cycle of heartbreak. I'm done with men." I said. "You want to break up with me?" he croaked.

"I do," I said looking at the pictures again. "You don't mean that," he answered. "I do," I spat back bitterly feeling anger arise in me. "No! I know you! I know what's best for us and this, what is going on is not it. Us breaking up is NOT it!" he yelled.

"We just need to talk. Your-you're just angry and I get that. Let's talk," he added panicking. "I'm done talking."

It stayed silent. "You can't leave me," he whispered crying and I started crying too. For a while nothing was said. All that could be heard was the both of us sniffling. It got too painful and I knew I needed to get off the phone. "I have to go," I whispered.

"No! Ashley no! Don't do this! Please, don't do this! She's nothing to me, but you..you're everything," his voice strained from crying. I shook my head, "I just need time, Michael."

"Please don't do this. Don't leave me! We can work this out!!" his voice cracked, making me cry even more. "Bye Michael," I whispered, getting ready to hang up. "Ashley no! Ashley-" he yelled as I hung up. I threw the phone down, crying as I heard the phone ring. I knew it was him.

It stopped ringing but started again right after. I unplugged the phone and got up walking to the door. I knocked on Wes' door. "Smiles? What's wrong?" he asked, hugging me. I shook my head, "If Michael calls, either don't answer or say I can't talk. Tell everyone else too," I said pulling away and Wes gave me the saddest look I've ever seen him give me. "Okay," he said, nodding sadly.

As I said that, Wes' phone rang. I looked over at his phone ringing on the table. He looked at me and grabbed it, answering it. "Hello?" he answered. He looked at me and I knew it was Michael. "Sorry Mike. I haven't seen her in a while since we got back," he said looking at me and I walked away crying to my room.

I haven't moved from this same spot in bed since I realized she didn't want to talk to me. I tossed and turned all night crying. I dozed off once, dreaming about her. I dreamed about her engaged in a warm conversation with me as her smell, the familiar scent that lingered on my bedding and on my clothes came to my nose. The way she smiled, it was everything I knew. Everything I would always know. She hadn't changed in my dream.

But then I woke up and realized it was all just a dream and the empty void inside my chest started to hurt again. I was miserable. I refused to believe we were over. It didn't seem real to me.

I don't know what to do with myself. I feel more than alone and the world has become even smaller. My eyes are full of tears, but the memories of her are clearer than ever. I want to be near her; the one I know. The one I love. I loved her because everything has been so good for so long. The only way for me to not love her, I'd have to be born again.

She was the one I adored. The one that made me sure. She was my one and now I'm left broken and my soul is scared. All of our dreams, broken. All of our plans, broken. Over something I wish I could erase. I never befriended Lisa out of the intentions of losing Ashley. She wasn't worth losing.

I sighed lying on my back. I slowly sat up looking around my bedroom. It looked like a mess. There were pillows everywhere, blankets and sheets on the floor, and glass shattered from throwing the glasses on my nightstand. It was a bad night to say the least. My heart felt like it had been ripped out of my chest.

I walked into the bathroom, recoiling at the bright lights. I looked in the mirror and I hated what I saw. My curls were everywhere, I had eyeliner running down my cheeks along with dried tears, and my eyes were bloodshot red. I already didn't like what I saw when I looked in the mirror and this made it worse.

I grabbed the glass by my sink and filled it with water, slowly drinking it trying to swallow the lump in my throat that felt stuck. I placed the glass down looking at the adjacent sink when I saw her heart necklace laying on the counter.

I walked over and grabbed it, clutching it in my fist. I held it close to my heart and started to cry. I slid down the wall, sitting against it. I opened my hand and looked at the heart in my hand. I chuckled lightly thinking about how she had my heart in her hand, leaving me vulnerable but here I was holding hers.

I played with the necklace before I started feeling that pain in my chest. I weakly got up and looked in the mirror. Abruptly I threw the glass I had earlier at the wall in anger and pain. I started shaking as I looked down at her necklace. I put it in my pocket and turned on the water to wash up.

I emerged soon after from the bathroom. I walked to my closet and I passed the closet I gave her. I knew it'd be too much if I went in there so I passed it going into mine grabbing a fedora and some sunglasses to cover up my pain so my staff wouldn't suspect anything.

I walked to the kitchen and luckily no one was around. I grabbed some orange juice. I wasn't hungry because I lost my appetite the moment she told me she was "done with men." As I drank my oj, my doorbell rang.

I frowned up and put my glass down, walking over to it. I opened the door and in ran my little sister. "Hi Mike!" she exclaimed happily hugging me. I didn't say anything, I just patted her back. "Mike, that was a wack hug," she said pulling back, "Woah. What happened to you? You look terrible," she said, touching my face.

A couple of tears rolled down my cheeks and Janet walked up to me again rubbing my arm. "Mike, what's wrong? You're scaring me," she said shakily. "Ashley and I," I said, choking up feeling that lump in my throat. I knew the moment I'd tell Janet, it'd become real.

Janet looked at me worriedly. "Come on, let's sit down," Janet said, leading me over to the couch. We sat down and she placed her hand over mine, "Let's try this again. Ashley and you, what?" she asked softly.

"We broke up," I whispered, crying. Janet gasped before she threw her arms around me, bringing me in for a hug. "I'm so sorry Mike. I'm so sorry," she said, rubbing my back. I cried softly in her arms.

I cried to her for about 10 minutes before I pulled away. I wiped my tears and I saw Janet wipe a few tears. "What happened?" she asked and I told her. "Mike, you know I love you, but becoming friends with Lisa was all bad. You befriended a woman who you openly admitted you used to have a crush on to your girlfriend."

"I know. I know. I didn't plan it like that. The honest truth is that I met Lisa through Brett to listen to her demos and at first our conversations were strictly about music. Only recently, they became more friendly. I just felt lonely when Ashley left," I said, wiping my tears again.

"I get that Mike, but you know Ashley's been hurt before. She's been cheated on and you've seen what that did to her, mentally and emotionally. It broke her and her trust. She put all her trust in you and I'm not saying you broke it but you wavered it," Janet said and I played with my hands.

"I never did anything with Lisa though. I wasn't ever going to. Barely a hug, not a kiss and definitely not sleep with her. I love Ashley too much to ever do that to her. She's my life, Dunk," I said sadly.

Janet rubbed my back, "I know she is and I know you love her. She knows it too. She'll come around." I sighed, "I hope it's soon. I'm miserable without her and it hasn't even been 24 hours."

"Yeah, you look miserable too," Janet commented and I gave her a look. "Too soon?" she asked and I nodded, "Too soon."

"I'm sorry. Have you tried calling her?" she asked and I shook my head, "I have, but no luck. I've left about 1000 voicemails but I think she turned off her phone. I tried calling people on her team like Wes and Alisha, but Wes said he hadn't seen her and Alisha didn't answer."

Janet looked down sadly. I looked at her, "Can you call her for me?" I asked. "Yeah, I can try. Hopefully she's not on a date," Janet snorted and I gave her the death stare. "Too soon again?" she cringed. "WAY too soon."

"When does she come home?" Janet asked, looking at me. "She was supposed to come home tomorrow. I don't know now," I mumbled. "I'll try getting in touch with her," Janet said, rubbing my back and I nodded.

Janet stayed with me for a while. She tried making me eat but I still had no appetite. I didn't want food, I wanted Ashley.

"I'm going to go lay back down," I said to Janet and she nodded, "I'm gonna stay for a bit longer," she answered back and I nodded. When I got to my room, I tried calling her again but i got her voicemail. I left the last message before her inbox became full. I know because I called again after. I guess she really was done with me.

I laid down in agony, trying to sleep my pain away, but that was no help. All that was in my head was her. I wasn't going to stop trying to get her back. I knew she was the one and I would rather die trying than to not try at all.

"Are you okay?" Alisha asked, running her hand over my head. "I don't know how to answer that," I said looking down. Alisha pulled me into a hug, "I'm so sorry Ash," she said sympathetically as tears rolled down my cheeks.

I can't believe I'm going through this again. The heartache was unbearable. Only this time it was worse. I loved Michael in a way I never loved before. And now, I don't know whether to love or hate him for making me so afraid of love. Michael was everything. He was the man I wanted forever. He always used to say he was the luckiest man in the world, but actually I was the lucky one.

Being able to love Michael in the way I did was the greatest gift in the world. And to be loved by him was the greatest feeling in the world. He was like a drug. I was addicted to his love and I could never get enough. I was on a natural high. Just being in his presence made my heart beat a thousand times per minute.

I miss everything about him. Especially how his eyes were always on me. Sometimes with irritation when he used to say I drove him crazy, but most of the time with so much love. It didn't matter where we were, his eyes were always fixated on me, brightening up my world with color.

He was the color to my black and white life. Our love was divine like the brightest of colors. I'd paint my soul to be with him. And now my world seemed to be all black because he wasn't here.

Alisha was finally able to calm me down. "Okay, how about we have Wes buy us a whole bunch of snacks and watch some movies? How does that sound?" she asked, wiping my tears. "Yeah, that sounds good," I said, nodding.

"Okay, go shower and get comfortable. I'll call Wes," she said, grabbing the phone as I got up and walked to my bedroom. I was staying at my condo in West Hollywood. I hadn't been here since I broke up with Aiden. It felt weird being here. Usually this is where I went when I needed to get away from Aiden, but now it was out of fear of Michael popping up at my house. Wes told me he showed up a few times but I wasn't there. I was home with my family and they were devastated just like me.

I walked in the bathroom and turned on the shower. I walked out to lay out my pajamas when my Nokia dinged, notifying me of a voicemail. I walked over to it and sat on my bed contemplating if I should listen to them. I knew they were from Michael.

I was stuck. I missed Michael more than anything but part of me was scared to talk to him or even see him. I sighed while picking up my phone. I pressed a button and put it to my ear.

You have thirty new messages. First message.

"Hey. It's me. This is probably the last voicemail I can send before your inbox becomes full and I don't have much time, so I'll make this quick.