《The Journey Home》15 - Letting Go

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Strong arms carried me to the bed where everything would change. His kiss was dominant, exhibiting every bit of strength that he held. His tongue tasted me, constantly prying my lips open to taste mine. The fear was there in the back of my mind. It would never leave me alone. But for once in my life, I decided that fear wouldn't dictate what I would do. There was nothing to be afraid of after all, for the man holding me would never hurt me; of that I was sure.

My fingers tangled in his hair, holding him as close to me as I possibly could. His lips left a scorching trail of kisses down my neck, igniting a fire that I didn't know could exist.

"You're so fucking beautiful," he murmured, grazing his thumbs over my hardened nipples. My back arched to him, craving more of his touch, wanting more of him. His usually light eyes were dark, the burning desire within them almost too much for me to handle. Almost. For the first time in my life I wanted someone, I craved a man's touch.

My eyes squeezed shut when I felt his tongue circle a nipple, my hands fell to my sides fisting the sheets. He groaned, sucking it into his mouth while his other hand worked the other. Moaning, I lifted my hips off of the bed needing some type of friction.

After giving my other nipple the same attention, his lips and tongue made its way down my abdomen, kissing every inch of skin he could find. It was too much. I glanced down to find his head between my legs, staring at my heated core with intense focus. Half sitting, I kept my eyes on him as he ran a finger through my glistening folds.

"Oh God..." I moaned, throwing my head back.

"So responsive," his voice was strained, as if it was painful even to speak.

I didn't know that such amount of pleasure was even possible. His fingers caressed every part of me and I watched him, focused on me, on giving me pleasure. I didn't know how I was even breathing. He glanced up at me, his eyes focused on my face as his tongue made contact with my flesh. His arms held my trembling legs apart while I fell back on the bed. Seeing that was too much.

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His mouth began its merciless assault on my heat, licking, sucking everything that I was giving him. I was panting for air, hoping that I wouldn't run out of it. My hips lifted, grinding against his greedy mouth but he pushed me back down, firm on his mission. Alex hummed, the vibrations sending the steady waves of excitement throughout my body.

I felt so overwhelmed with sensations that I didn't think more was possible. His expert movements made the pleasure increase by the second, but I was dangling by a thread that I just couldn't seem to let go of. Until his fingers were inside me and I felt myself tense.

"That's it, Eileen.." He encouraged, as my back arched off the bed and I cried out. "Let go, love. I'm here."

As if on cue, my body obeyed his words. His lips stayed latched on to me, drinking me up, tasting every bit of myself that I was giving to him.

I felt him traveling up my flushed body, soon his lips once again dancing with mine. I stiffened when he placed himself between my legs, my eyes opening immediately. He stopped, gazing into my eyes with confusion at my reaction.

It's Alex. It's only Alex. He will not hurt you. He is good.

"We can stop, love. We don't have to do anything you don't want." His fingers placed a lock of hair behind my ear, the intensity in his eyes making me forget my fears.

My legs wrapped around his waist, feeling him probe at my entrance. Alex groaned, grinding himself against my wetness. I pulled him down, kissing him again, my taste still on his lips. Nothing else mattered in this moment, where he erased all evidence of another man. I didn't know if Alex was mine, but I knew that I was completely his.

"Fuck.." he hissed, pushing himself inside my slowly.

I felt impossibly stretched, my body not used to the intrusion. But I felt full, I felt whole.

Adoring eyes met my own as he pressed his forehead against mine with a small smile on his lips.

"I've wanted you for so long, Eileen."

"Then take me, Alex. Take all of me."

He took my hands, pinning my hands over my head with our fingers intertwined. His movements were slow and steady, taking my body and soul with every one of his thrusts. His grunting told me that he felt just as much satisfaction as I did. If I had any doubt of it, his softly spoken words reminded me how beautiful I was, how in his eyes I was perfect. I closed my own, losing myself in what he was giving me.

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He was slowly healing my broken heart.

Soon his thrusts grew quicker, desperate but I didn't care. We were racing to the finish line and nothing would stop us.

"Open your eyes, I want to see you," he demanded.

I obeyed, once again my body in tune with what he wanted. His lustful eyes met my own as I held on to his shoulders as much as I could. I memorized the feel of his skin underneath my fingers. More than anything, though, I etched into my memory the way he was looking at me, full of want, of need. His stare making love to my very soul.

Making love.

Alex pulled himself back, taking my leg and placing it over his arm, the angle making him reach even deeper within me.

"Alex, oh... Yes!"

With a deep thrust I tightened around him, feeling myself come apart in his arms, yet all the pieces of my shattered heart fall back together. I was falling yet rising all at the same time. He followed soon after, groaning softly, my name a mere whisper on his lips.

Our pounding hearts beat to the same rhythm, our bodies connected and our souls had become one. I don't know how long we laid there in silence and it didn't matter.

All I knew was that my life would never be the same.

My eyes snapped opened, the room was still dark when I felt a heavy weight over my body. Instant fear took over, making me gasp audibly. I didn't quite remember where I was, until the voice next to me spoke.

"Hey," he soothed, his arm tightening around my body. "It's okay, I'm here."

"I fell asleep.." I said, realizing that after our encounter I had knocked out almost immediately.

"Yes, you did. It's been a long day for you, you need your rest."

Spooning? I think that is what it is called.

He held me close to him, his hand resting on my belly. Alex placed a kiss on my shoulder, reminding me just what they were capable of doing. I felt happy, for the first time but the nostalgia present couldn't be ignored. This was what my first time should have been like. I should have been cared for, cherished. Instead I was used for someone else's needs.

I didn't realize that I was crying until Alex turned me on my back, wiping away the tears.

"Do you regret it?" he asked, his face masked with worry.

"No, God no, I don't regret it." I sniffled, pushing away the sudden sadness I felt. "Marty says my brain doesn't shut off, I think it's true. But no, Moretti, I don't regret this."

Just as I thought he would, Alex frowned.

"Is that a bad Moretti or a good Moretti? Because it's never a good Moretti."

I giggled, bringing his face down to kiss him.

"It's good," I whispered. "Very good."

He smiled against my lips, kissing me with such passion that it amazed me. I knew he was a man with experience, but I refused to think that he had this connection with anyone else but me. Whatever it was, it was too real, too intense for either of us to share it with someone else. His hand traveled between my legs and they fell open, ready for him.

"We didn't use protection..." He said quietly, burying his face in my neck.

"I know." The words came out as a moan, his fingers not stopping their assault on my heat.

"What will happen if-"

"Same thing if you don't Eileen." My lips parted in a silent gasp when he bit down between my shoulder and neck. Alex was the predator, and I was his willing prey. "I'll still be here, no matter what."

His words broke down each and every one of the walls that I had build up. His hot kisses warming up the coldness that had once settled in my heart.

He drove into me passionately, as if being inside me was what kept him alive. He brought us to the brink of ecstasy again...

And again...

And again...

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