"Did Brandon like the watch?" Nick asked as we walked down to Riley's place after getting back from our interview downtown.

Yesterday was Brandon's birthday and I spent it going to dinner with him and his girlfriend. Unfortunately, it ended with me staying over at Riley's because I did not want to hear my brother going at it with Anna in the bedroom next to mine.

"Yeah. I told him he's not getting another gift from me until he has his "over the hill" birthday party." I responded.

"That is a pretty long time." He chuckled.

"For eighteen years, the only things I got from him on my birthday was a birthday card with an insulting joke. I am sure he will survive fifteen years without a gift from me." I scoffed. Funnily enough, I still had every single card he's ever given me sitting in a shoe box in my closet.

"At least you didn't have to hear him getting some this year." He shrugged, but I shook my head as I knocked on Riley's door.

"Anna being pregnant did not stop them." I scoffed. "Why did you think I slept at Riley's last night?"

"Hello, my friends." Riley popped out from her door, opening it up for us to come in. Sensing by the apologetic look on her face, I could only assume Harry was here. While I was staying here last night, I told her about my talk with Nick and she agreed that I should tell him, but only when I felt ready.

"Hey." Nick and I say in unison, stepping inside and kicking our shoes off.

"How in the hell is that even possible? Wouldn't her belly have gotten in the way?" Nick pointed out, grimacing.

"I don't want to imagine my brother having sex, thank you very much." I shuddered.

"Do we want to know what you're talking about?" Zayn questioned as he walked towards us from the kitchen. I didn't bother questioning his presence, having a feeling that the guys were here.

I have been avoiding Harry since my return last week, simply because of my talk with Nick. He was right when he said I needed time to let everything sink in, but I was still deciding whether or not I should tell Harry anything.

"Can you have sex when you're eight months pregnant?" Nick asked him, as if he would know.

Zayn grimaced, not expecting such a question, all four of us walking over to the living room to sit down. "How the hell would I know?"

"Yes, you can have sex when you're pregnant. It actually induces labor sometimes." I answered in a sigh, mirroring Harry's light smile with my own as a greeting. Surprisingly, Louis wasn't here.

"Oh god. Are you talking about last night?" Riley realized, taking the spot next to me.

"What happened last night?" Zayn questioned, sitting next to Harry and taking a sip of the water in his hand.

"Brandon had sex with his baby mama." Riley snorted.

"How in the hell can a woman who is eight months pregnant have sex? Doesn't that hurt the child or something? Can Brandon even see the vagina that far along?" Nick continued to rant, while I covered my ears and tried not to picture my brother having sex.

"Ew! Please stop." I screwed my eyes shut and mentally gagged.

"I'm serious!" He nearly cried, pulling his phone out of his pocket. "I'm looking this shit up."

"Can we stop talking about his sex life?" I huffed, removing my hands from my ears and leaning back on the couch.

"Has your mom contacted you after the Olympics?" Riley asked, thankfully changing our conversation.

"No." I asked, checking my watch for the time. "Haven't heard from her in months, thank god."

"You blocked her number, didn't you?" Nick asked, setting his phone aside.

"When has that ever stopped her?" I scoffed.

"Fair point."

"I told her if she contacted me again I'd get a restraining order." I shrugged, which certainly gained the attention from the two silent men on the other couch.

"That's a bit extreme, no?" Zayn asked with his brows scrunched together.

"You haven't met her." I rolled my eyes, remembering the last time I saw my mother.

"And you don't want to." Harry huffed in annoyance. I almost forgot that he had met my mother once, and it was the most awkward, painful experience of my life. I was convinced for weeks that Harry was going to break up with me after he met her.

Harry's gaze shifted to me for a brief second, eyeing my reaction to his comment. I avoided his eyes, though, and tried my best to ignore him without seeming rude.

"My dad even said he'd help me file one against her if I needed to, since he's a lawyer." I added. "Hopefully I won't have to take it that far anytime soon."

"Hey, where's Louis?" Nick asked Riley, which made her shift in her seat. I eyed her weirdly, sensing something was wrong if she reacted that way to the name of her boyfriend.

"No idea."

Something was definitely wrong, because she glanced at me and gave me a look saying "we will talk later."

"I stopped by there earlier and he was home. Should I invite him over?" Harry asked.

"No!" Riley nearly shouted, quickly composing herself and clearing her throat. "I mean, no."

Everyone looked a bit taken back, including myself, at her outburst.

"O...kay?" Zayn chuckled confusedly. "Riley, can I talk to you for a second?"

Riley tensed up beside me, but stood up anyways in response, following Zayn down the hall to one of the rooms.

Nick being Nick, he noticed the weird tension that sprouted since Harry was now the only person here with us, and decided to fix it by clearing his throat and walking to the kitchen, which did not help at all.

"So..." I trailed off awkwardly, looking over at Harry.

"So..." He responded with a nervous chuckle, twisting the rings on his left fingers.

It was moments like this when I felt nervous talking to him. Now every time I see him, I'm reminded of everything; the lips I used to kiss whenever I wanted; the hands I used to hold; the soft hair I used to be able to run my hands through; the body that I was once allowed to touch; the tattoos I used to trace with the tip of my fingers. I doesn't feel real thinking back to that time of my life, and the huge impact it had on me mentally.

"I don't believe you."

"Pardon?" I asked in confusion to those four words.

He sighed and shifted his body so he was sort of facing my direction. "I don't believe that you are fine with me being here. You've been avoiding me since the night you got back and I know it."

"Harry -"

"Please, Madison. I dated you for over a year. My presence obviously makes you uncomfortable so just say it." He frowned, leaving me astonished.

"I'm not doing this." I huffed in annoyance, standing up from my spot and walking away, not wanting to have this conversation in the company of our friends.

I put my shoes on and walked out of her apartment, heading to the elevators and pressing the button for going up.

Just as I stepped inside the empty elevator and pressed the button for my floor, an arm is shoved between the doors before they can close.

"For fuck's sake." I mumbled under my breath, annoyed by the fact that Harry followed me.

"I'm sorry for bringing it up, but I feel like we need to have this conversation, Madison."

"Why can't you accept the fact that I'm not holding on to something that happened years ago, Harry? You should really leave it alone before I actually do get mad." I say as calmly as I could, folding my arms in front of my chest and leaning against the wall.

His nostrils flared and before I know it, he's pulling the emergency stop button.

"What the hell are you doing?" I exclaimed with wide eyes, feeling the elevator stop moving.

"We are not getting out until you admit that you're mad." He stubbornly tells me.

"Of course I'm fucking mad, Harry. You just locked me in an elevator when I'm claustrophobic!" I exclaimed, my heart racing as I tried my very best to not think about the fact that I'm in an elevator that is not moving.

"Shit. Sorry." He panicked, quickly pushing the emergency stop handle back in and accidentally hitting a few buttons around it.

"Why are you so hung up on the fact that I'm not mad at you? What do you want from me?" I asked him, my anger slowly rising.

"I want you to know how sorry I am for how things ended, and I want you to admit you are upset. Shout at me, cuss me out, literally anything! You being so forgiving is driving me bloody mad." He shouts in a whispered manner, looking just about ready to pull his hair out.

Is he serious?

I stared at him like he was actually insane for a few seconds, wanting this nightmare of a conversation to be over.

"I'm not going to shout at you, and I'm not going to cuss you out." I say calmly. "You left because you wanted to get better in a place that was familiar and filled with family, so why should I be upset?"

"I feel it, Maddie. You may not be upset about that, but I know it's bothering you so say it." He nearly begged me.

"What do you want me to say?" I started, becoming very frustrated. Mad is what he wants, then mad is what he will get. "That I'm mad you moved back here knowing I lived in the area?"

Once those words left my mouth, it all flowed out of me like a river, the tears in my eyes starting to fall while he finally got the reaction he was waiting for.

"That you made it seem like you didn't care about me at all after you left?" I sniffed, pointing at him in accusation. "Or that when I was there for you when you were going through shit with your father, you acted as if I didn't even exist when you moved back home while I tried to check on you every fucking day, and you didn't even bother answering once!"

He stood there silently, listening to my every word as I poured out years worth of emotional frustration out onto him.

"I will never be mad at you for leaving, but after everything I did for you our entire relationship, it hurt so fucking much when the one time I needed you, you weren't there." I cried silently, watching as the guilt ate him alive, his own eyes on the verge of spilling hot tears.

"I loved you so much, Harry. Then after you left you made me feel...worthless; like that entire year we were together meant nothing to you." I continued, keeping my tone at a neutral level as my bottom lip quivered. "I should hate you..."

Those four words caused him to cringe, and I noticed his chest heave while he listened, my words seeming to hit him pretty hard.

"...but I don't. I can't...because no matter how shitty I felt because of your silence, I know you didn't mean to hurt me. I know you loved and cared about me. I guess maybe that's why it hurt me as much as it did." I finished.

Taking a few deep breathes, I quickly wiped my eyes with my sleeve and looked up at him through my glossy eyes.

"So there you go. You got my honest reaction. Happy now?" I sniffled quietly, relief hitting me as the doors opened right on time for my floor.

I didn't wait for any response, feeling suffocated enough from being in that elevator for so long with him. As I approached my door, I heard the elevator doors close, and I took a quick look to make sure he didn't follow me out.

When I saw that he didn't, I felt alleviated, stepping inside the comfort of my home knowing I got most of what I really wanted to say to him off of my chest.

Sadly, that wasn't even the hardest thing I had to say to him.

• • •