Photo Credit : http://defatch.com/diamond-ring-for-engagement/canary-diamond-engagement-rings-harry-winston/

Like other fans, I dream of one day seeing Alden and Maine walk down the aisle to exchange vows of forever. But I also respect that it's their decision to make, their lives to lead, and reality may be different from what is real. So for now, let's just imagine that they are actually a step away from taking the plunge, and Alden is waiting for Maine to tell him to put that E-gift on her finger.

Will it be a happy ending or a tragic one? Please read on. I encourage you to read till the end, to appreciate the story. Would love to hear from you, please feel free to leave a comment or tweet me via #19CarpeDiem. Enjoy! :)

It was the weekend after Alden's successful concert at the Ynares Center. People were all excited because of rumors that Maine was at the concert incognito. Video clips of Maine in a black track suit walking quickly towards the exit of the venue spread quickly in Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Photos of a chopper landing on a rooftop somewhere with Maine as its alleged passenger also added fuel to the fire. All in all, it was a happy weekend for Aldub nation.

But Maine knew that the fans were waiting for something from her and Alden. Their sweetness on-cam and off-cam was undeniable, fans were happy with the latest videos and photos taken of them while they were in Boracay, Dakak and Clark. Some fans respected their privacy and assured them that a confirmation on the true status of their relationship was unnecessary, because their actions spoke volumes already.

But more than the fans, Maine knew that she owed Alden a confirmation on her true feelings. Alden, or RJ was so important to her, her beacon in this dark world of showbiz. He guided her throughout her journey, patiently walking her through the joys and pains of being a celebrity. He never ever considered being threatened by her success, never competed with her popularity. A rare gem of a man who also happened to be in love with her.

Sometimes the depth of his love scares her, because she wonders if she could ever match his selflessness. After all this time, she finally decided to put an end to RJ's waiting and settle the score between them. She checks her watch before pressing his number on her speed dial list. Sunday Pinasaya was on its last few minutes, they could meet up at her condo to talk.

"Babe, hi." His voice was a bit breathless, but she could almost see him smiling.

"How are you babe? Tired?"

"Not really, why?"

"I need to talk to you about something. Would you have time?"

"Of course I do, love. Where do you want to go?"

"Condo na lang, I'll be there in an hour."

"Is something wrong babe? You sound nervous."

"RJ, stop worrying about me. Later na lang, ok?"

"OK, laters baby," He said with a laugh. It was private joke between them, his reference to Christian Grey of the Fifty Shades novel.

The hour passed by quickly, Maine arrived earlier than planned at the condo. She took a quick shower and changed into a light yellow button down shirt dress. Putting her still damp hair up in a messy bun, she applied some berry lip tint and surveyed herself in the mirror. Except for her eyebags, she looked ok.

Maine took a deep breath to settle her nervousness. What she was about to do scared her, but she needed to do it. She reached into her bag for the small square gift RJ gave on her birthday, the E-gift everyone speculated about. It was still unopened, so many times she was tempted to open it but denied herself the pleasure of knowing what was inside.

She heard a key turning in the lock of her door and saw RJ coming in, freshly showered, with a hint of a stubble on his chin. His dimpled smile made her heart beat faster. In his hand was a gift as usual, an assortment of Patchi chocolates, one of her favorite brands.

"Love...." He said engulfing her in a warm hug. She hugged him back tightly and drank in his scent, burying her nose in his chest. She kissed the spot where his v-neck white shirt exposed skin, her lips lingering in the warmth. Alden loosened his arms around her, one hand reaching for her chin. They kissed gently at first, but the need to be together took over, as the kiss deepened, and her arms pulled him closer. Maine felt her knees weaken as he ran the tip of his tongue gently over her lips.

"Babe, you wanted to talk?" He asked with worried eyes. She felt so scared, remembering what she had to say. It felt so good to be held in his arms, but she knew they needed this talk. Faced with an internal struggle, she weakly gave in to her need to be with him first before telling him what she needed to say.

"I missed you, babe. Let's talk later," She said pulling him back for a kiss.

RJ smiled against her lips and lifted her off the ground, effortlessly carrying her to the bedroom. Laying her down gently on the bed, he lowers himself beside her, nuzzling her neck. Her legs entwine with his, bringing him closer to her. As his body covers hers, he unfastens the top two buttons of her shirt and kisses the vee of exposed skin.

Maine pulls his shirt up, wanting to run her hands over his body. As RJ raises his body to remove his shirt, he looks at her questioningly, knowing that their intimacy could lead to something deeper. They have never gone all the way before, RJ always practiced restraint with her. She smiles at him, pulling him back.

"I love you RJ. Always remember that baby." Her eyes tear up, filled with emotion.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He looked unsure and puzzled.

"Yes, babe. Please..." She looks at him unwaveringly and unbuttons her shirt.

"Wait," He said, stopping her hand. "Let me..."

He unbuttons her shirt, kissing the skin exposed after every unfastened button. Pulling a blanket over them to ensure she wouldn't feel cold, RJ's hand covers her breast as he nuzzles her neck once again.

________________

She was out of the bedroom by the time RJ woke up, the gift in her hands. He walks to her and sees the box in her hands, smiling expectantly at her. But she wasn't smiling. Her tear-stained face told a different story, and a sense of dread sweeps over him.

"RJ......" She began, choked in her tears. She gives him the box, putting it in his hand, closing his fingers over it when his hand seemed uncooperative to hold it.

"Maine, what is it? We just made love, why are you returning this?" He was incredulous but tried to be patient. "I'm sorry I let it go too far, I knew it was wrong, baby, I'm sorry. Please, don't do this. I'll be careful next time."

"RJ, no, no, it's not your fault. I wanted that, I wanted to be with you. It's just..." She couldn't speak, overwrought by emotions. He watched her cry, unable to ease her pain. Tears welled in his eyes too, as he felt his heart breaking slowly. "I'm breaking up with you,RJ."

"Huh? So ano yung ginawa natin, send away gift mo? Ayos ha.'" He knew it was harsh but he couldn't help it. She flinched at what he said. Immediately he was sorry. He hugged her tighly, rubbing her back cradling her head closer to his shoulder.

"RJ," She said sobbing. Her arms wrap around him tightly.

"Babe, sorry. Sorry." He pulls her down to the couch, setting himself apart from her. He reaches for the gift and unwraps it, taking out a black velvet box with the letters HW on its lid. Inside was a canary engagement ring, a flawless piece of jewelry that took RJ nights of research on the internet, just to find a ring he considered worthy of his feelings for her. As he prepares to kneel in front of her, she looks at him in horror and motions to him to stop.

"RJ, please no! I can't do this! Nahihirapan na ko, tama na. Get up, stop it."

Like a douse of cold water, he stands, turning away from her to compose himself. His tears fall, his heart felt like it was being squeezed, almost like he couldn't breathe. He turns to her, eyes filled with pain.

"Nahihirapan ka? Sa tingin mo ba ako hindi? I waited, I never rushed you because I thought you needed time. But you were sweet to me. Tangina, you loved me back, don't deny it. I agreed to keep things between us private because you wanted to, kahit minsan iniisip ko na baka ayaw mo malink sakin for the sake of your career. Ano pa ba? Ha? Ano pang kulang?"

"Wala! Wala kang kulang, you were perfect to me. You made me happy, sobra."

"I made you happy so as reward hihiwalayan mo ko? Maine, it's amazing how your mind works sometimes."

"RJ, I don't know if I can make you understand. It's not you, akong may problema. Takot ako, maybe I will never be ready for a commitment. Masaya tayo ngayon but until when? I love you but it's not enough, I don't think I can ever do the things you do for me. I can't even express myself well enough for you to understand."

"Bullshit Maine, don't insult me by saying you love me pero hihiwalayan mo ko. This is your pessimism talking. If you really loved me you'd fight for me. And that would be enough. You don't need to return favors because I never expected you to. Mahalin mo lang ako, yun lang. Be with me."

"I CAN'T. Di mo ba maintindihan? Commitment scares me. Everytime, everytime I commit myself to someone, things go wrong. I end up losing the one I love. And I hurt for so long. RJ, what I feel for you is so strong, if I commit to you and lose you, I will never recover."

"Babe, then let's not commit muna. Keep the ring, please. Pag ready ka na saka tayo magcommit."

She looked at him, for a moment softening. It was a look she gave everytime he did something nice for her. But slowly, her face changed, masking the love she felt.

"RJ, I'm sorry. I don't want to fall further for you. Pag pinalalim ko pa ito, lalong masakit if I lose you. Wag na natin pahabain ito. Umuwi ka na."

He wanted to stay and continue fighting for her, but he knew Maine well. Once she made up her mind, she would never change it. He decided to let it rest for now. He stood up, left the box on her table and walked to the door.

"Please call me when you get home."

"Tsss. Stop. Don't pretend you care. You win, we're done. You don't know what you did, Maine."

"I'm so sorry."

"I also lost so many battles with commitment before babe. In fact I already gave up, until you came. Salamat. Kahit sandali lang naranasan ko magmahal at mahalin ng tutoo."

He walked to her and kissed her on the forehead, hugging her for the last time. As the door closed, Maine dropped to the couch and hugged her Alden pillow, crying. It was for the best, she told herself, the bashing would come but it would all end. RJ can finally go back to primetime where he belonged, without worrying about the fans and her. No more worrying about real versus reel. But with it, no more surprises. No more late night visits, kisses until dawn, or incognito dates.

It was an hour later when her phone finally rang. Thankful that he called her anyway, she answered without checking the caller ID.

"Babe, you home na?" She chided herself for still using the endearment.

"Maine? Mama Ten ito. Maine...." Mama Ten sounded upset.

"Mama Ten? Bakit po?"

"Maine.....SI RJ......punta ka sa Asian Hospital."

"PO? ANONG NANGYARI KAY RJ?" She reached for her bag and was rushing out of the condo.

"Naaksidente siya Maine. Please, punta ka dito, hindi na siya ma-revive, please..."

__________

She was crying hard when the key in her lock turned without her noticing. Arms wrapped around her, big muscular arms that she always playfully squeezed. She couldn't stop crying. She felt him kiss her cheek, the stubble on his chin brushing against her jaw.

"Baby, sssshhhhh. Stop crying na."

"I c-c-can't stop babe."

Taking her tablet away from her grasp, Alden sets the tablet on her table and hugs her again.

"Did you like it?"

"It was so real, babe. Damn these fan fics, tutoong tutoo." She said sniffing.

"I told you it was good," He said smiling. "Makes you think how uncanny that fans know us so well."

"Babe, about your gift....I don't want to wait anymore." She reached for it in her bag. "I carry it with me all the time babe. Dapat after your concerts kakausapin na kita, I didn't want to divert your concentration from work. But do you mind if I get selfish and want to wear this ring now? Ayoko na maghintay, not after reading that."

She looked like a sheepish little girl, her large eyes damp from tears, a slight hiccup shaking her shoulders. Damn, he loved her so much. Finally, the time has come.

"Love, I've been waiting for this. No, of course I don't mind."

As Alden took out the ring from its box, he made a mental note to leave a comment on the fan fiction author's page.

Kung sino ka man, thank you, he said smiling, thank you talaga.