At exactly five minutes to six, Kakashi found himself staring at the rusty doorbell on Minato's house.

This was the first major change to occur in this world. In his own, there had never been any "team dinner" the night before his Jōnin exam, and Kakashi had to wonder why things had changed.

Maybe Minato had been telling the truth, when he had said it was just a treat for the three of them performing so high above expectations.

Kakashi grimaced. Or maybe his and Obito's behaviour had been off-putting enough to warrant extra scrutiny. Minato hadn't been hailed a genius for nothing.

He eyed the unassuming little doorbell, reminded himself again that he was a fully capable shinobi, and pressed the button.

No need to get nerves. It was just a dinner. Just a dinner at his sensei's house.

A muffled crash sounded from inside the house, like someone had dropped a plate into the sink halfway through washing it. This was accompanied by a loud yell and even louder footsteps.

Ah. Right. Not just his sensei's house. It was also—

The door flung open, and Uzumaki Kushina grinned down at him.

"Kakashi, ya little punk!" she exclaimed, loudly enough that Kakashi was certain the entire street had heard her.

He stood there as she ruffled his hair with a maniac grin on her face. Her hand felt wet, and Kakashi hoped that it wasn't dirty dishwater.

"...Hello, Kushina. Can I come in?"

"How do you get it to stay all pointy like that?" she marvelled in awe, still messing with his hair and completely ignoring his words.

A figure appeared behind her in the entranceway. "Kushina, let Kakashi in," Minato said, an exasperated smile on his face. "You left the tap on, by the way."

Kushina spun around with a yelp. "Ah, sh—" her eyes darted to Kakashi, "—shoot. Did you—"

"Yes, yes, I turned it off for you," Minato said, holding back a laugh. "Are you still upset about that water bill thing?"

Kushina's eyes flashed, and she raised a clenched fist. "Damn Mikoto and Fugaku," she hissed. "How is it possible that they have a lower water bill than we do? They've got a kid! We've got to beat them, show 'em what's what!" She punctuated her statement with a crack of her knuckles.

Kakashi edged around her and stepped inside, taking off his shoes.

"You know, we would probably beat them if you didn't always insist on taking hour-long showers."

"Hey! If you had hair this long, you'd take longer showers, too!"

Minato laughed. "Of course, of course," he said teasingly, stepping past Kushina to shut the door.

Kakashi watched as Kushina sulked and Minato chuckled, and he couldn't help but smile a little to himself.

They really were the perfect pair. It had been obvious to everyone, back then, clear as day even to Kakashi's emotionally-obtuse teenage self.

And so it hurt to remember how their happiness had been ripped away from them all too soon. By Obito, no less.

That bastard. Was there any recent mess that he didn't have a hand in?

"Oh, Kakashi, you can go sit on down," Minato said, a touch sheepishly. Kakashi pulled himself out of his thoughts. "Kushina and I will—"

"No, no, no, you go and entertain the kid," Kushina said, waving her hand and making her way to the kitchen. "I'm the chef here, chef calls the shots. You'll just mess it up, anyways."

Kakashi had noticed the smell long ago, before he had even entered the house, in fact, but still— "Miso ramen?" He forcibly reminded himself not to sound too amused. He pulled out a chair at the dining table and sat down, Minato doing the same thing next to him at the head of the table.

"Of course," Kushina said, looking positively scandalized as she grabbed a carton of eggs out of the fridge. "Ramen is the perfect dish for growing children! And I'll have you know that this isn't that miserable cup ramen that peasants eat, oh no. This is the good stuff. Ichiraku-level—no, better than Ichiraku's," she declared, dumping the entire carton of eggs into a huge pot of boiling water.

"It's true," Minato said, watching her. "Kushina's cooking is incredible." There was a slightly dreamy look in his eyes.

"I'm sure," Kakashi said wryly. He watched Kushina lug a stock pot out of the cabinets that was the size of her torso and had to be at least forty quarts. He would bet his entire collection of Icha Icha novels that Kushina was planning to fully capitalize on the "leftovers" of tonight's dinner.

"Someone's sounding like they don't have a whole lot of faith in the chef," Kushina huffed, filling the pot up with water. "I thought you liked miso, twerp."

Kakashi made a dubious sound. "Miso soup, yes."

"Psh." Kushina snorted, flapping a green-onion-holding hand. "Same difference."

Kakashi opened his mouth, wanting to insist that no, it really wasn't the same thing at all. Then Kushina picked up a chef's knife and began slicing away at the onions with a brutal efficiency, and he thought better of it.

Across the table, Minato looked like he wanted to laugh at Kakashi, but was too polite to do so. Instead, he propped his head on his hand and gave Kakashi a smile.

"So, how are feeling about your Jōnin exam tomorrow, Kakashi? Nervous?"

"Of course not," Kakashi said immediately. As things stood now, the Jōnin exam would be a breeze for him.

"You sound confident," Minato remarked.

Kushina looked up from her chopping board. "You sound cocky," she corrected with a grin. "I hope you're as good as you say."

"It's not cocky if it's true," Kakashi said, deciding right then that he would play up his old teenage self-confidence for all it was worth.

"It is if you're still a kid, kid," Kushina said, still grinning. She strode back over to the pot and pressed her hands to the sides, causing a seal to activate and the water to boil. (The casual ease with which Kushina did that was just unfair, Kakashi thought. And lazy. But he filed it away in his brain as something to look into later.) Grabbing a ladle, she started stirring in miso. "Your voice still sounds like a girl, you know. Find me in another ten years, then we'll talk."

Kakashi nearly frowned. Kushina wouldn't be around in another ten years.

He shoved the thought away. He didn't want to dwell on something like that. Not here. Not now. No, right now, he was spending time with Minato and Kushina. That was all.

Without missing a beat, he said instead, "I'll bet you three months' worth of Ichiraku ramen that I win my Jōnin exam spar."

Kushina stopped stirring the broth.

"Oh?" Her eyes gleamed. "You think you've got what it takes to pull one over on the Jōnin Commander?"

"Kakashi, you know who the Jōnin Commander is, right?" Minato said, taken aback.

"Hmm? It's just Nara Shikaku, isn't it?" Kakashi said with a straight face.

Minato stared at him like he was insane. "The spar is only half of the exam, to test that your combat skills are up to standards—you're not really expected to win," he protested.

"No, no, this is interesting," Kushina said, a sharp grin spreading across her face. She set her ladle down. "I'll take you up on that bet, Kakashi."

Kakashi nodded.

Minato stared back and forth between both of them, a look of alarm on his face as he realized they were both completely serious. He looked at Kushina with reproach. "Kushina! You shouldn't take advantage of Kakashi like that. He's thirteen, for goodness' sake."

"Exactly! I'm not stealing candy from a baby, I'm stealing candy from a teenager."

Minato frowned.

"Don't worry, Sensei," Kakashi said placidly. "I know what I'm doing."

Kushina raised an eyebrow. "Three months isn't all that much, you know," she said, faux-casually. "Hedging your bets?"

Minato winced. "Kushina—"

"Care to raise the stakes?" Kakashi responded. "You and Sensei just bought this house, so I didn't want to inconvenience you."

With a predatory grin that would have made lesser men cower in fear, Kushina slammed her palms onto the counter, leaning over to stare down at Kakashi.

"Six months."

"Sure."

Kushina smirked. "We have a deal, then." She straightened, satisfaction oozing out of her voice.

Kakashi had to bite his lip to keep from smiling.

A distant part of his brain registered the fact that he was quite enjoying himself, right now. The rest of the tightness in his shoulders dissipated.

Minato rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Kakashi... you're going to regret that," he said weakly. "Shikaku's a genius. He could probably even beat me—"

"No, he couldn't," Kushina and Kakashi said simultaneously.

"Well, on a good day—"

"Not in a million damn years," Kushina said bluntly.

"Hell would sooner freeze over," Kakashi stated.

Minato's cheeks turned a light pink. "Alright, but my point is, Kakashi, I know you're a prodigy, but Shikaku's brilliant himself. And he has twice as much experience as you do. You should really, really reconsider this bet."

"Even geniuses are still human," Kakashi said cryptically. "Have a little faith, Sensei."

Minato sighed. "I didn't think you were a gambler."

"It's not gambling if I know I'm going to win."

Kushina laughed. "Minato, I think Kakashi has just edged Obito out of the number one spot for the cockiest little kid on your team." She picked up her ladle and, with a spring in her step, went back to stirring her miso and sauces.

The corner of Kakashi's lip curved up, just a little. Six months of Ichiraku would be a much better win than the single month that Kakashi had swindled out of Naruto. Like son, like mother.

And not just in their ramen betting tendencies. Talking to Kushina was like talking to a more devious, more eccentric Naruto—complete with verbal tic, over-the-top boisterousness, ramen worship, and all.

It really was nice to spend time with Kushina again.

...Maybe he had let himself relax a tad too much, what with the betting and all—but this was Minato and Kushina. Tonight might end up being the last memory Kakashi would ever have of being with his teammates together again. He wasn't Obito—he didn't want to put up a mask in front of loved ones.

Even if this wasn't his world, it was awfully similar, and, well... he was allowed to enjoy it while it lasted, right?

Obito, of course, showed up last, forty minutes later. Kakashi couldn't even find it in himself to be annoyed, because he had been doing the exact same thing for going on eighteen years.

Still, when the doorbell rang and Kushina flew open the door to reveal a flustered-looking Obito, Kakashi made sure to sound exactly the part of a haughty teenager.

"Of course you'd only show up right when Kushina is about to serve dinner."

Obito scowled. "Shut it, Kakashi. There was an old man by the centre square, and—"

He yelped as Kushina, who had been staring at him for a brief pause, grabbed his arm, pulled him inside, and gave him a noogie.

"You brat, you're holding me up from my ramen!" She let go of him, and immediately started pushing him towards the washroom. "Hurry up and wash your hands, the noodles are practically frozen over at this point!"

"Agh, okay, okay!" Obito squeaked.

Minato watched them go. "The noodles are sitting in a pot of boiled water, Kushina," he said half-heartedly.

"I said 'practically'," Kushina griped.

Obito washed his hands and came back, plopping down into the seat crosswise from Kakashi, a pout on his face that was just the right mix of childishness and sullenness.

From beside Kakashi, Rin gave Obito a sheepish smile and pushed a small, paper box towards him.

"I brought some matcha cookies—had brought them," she amended. "We sort of ate them while we were waiting for you." She laughed at his dismayed expression. "There's still one left! Kakashi really wanted to eat it, but I told him to leave one for you."

"Thanks, Rin," Obito said gratefully, grabbing the box. He glared at Kakashi. "Thanks for nothing, Bakashi."

Kakashi gave him a bland stare. "Be on time."

Incredibly hypocritical of him, but, well, it wasn't like anyone here could call him out on it.

Obito huffed and turned to the box Rin had given him. He reached in to grab the cookie—

Kushina zipped over to the table and whisked the box out of Obito's hands. "Nice try, pal," she said with a scoff.

"Oi! That's my cookie!"

"Like I'm going to let you eat a cookie when I'm just about to dish up some badass miso ramen," she retorted, striding off and plunking the box down on the kitchen counter. "Eat it after. Like how desserts are meant to be eaten."

"But you guys all ate them too!"

"A good thirty minutes ago," Kakashi said.

Obito glanced at Rin for help, an imploring look on his face.

"Wouldn't you rather save the cookie for dessert?" Rin asked, laughing.

Obito turned to Minato. "Sensei, tell Kushina to let me have the cookie," he pleaded.

"Sorry, Obito," Minato said, his smile looking slightly guilty.

Kushina laughed. "No can do, bud. I'm the one wearing the pants in this relationship."

Minato looked like he wanted to argue that, but also really didn't want to.

"Traitors," Obito muttered, watching dolefully as Kushina went back to preparing the ramen bowls. "Why's the ramen taking so long?" he asked sullenly, slumping into his seat and crossing his arms.

Kakashi marvelled at how, in only six short words, Obito had managed to be both incredibly insensitive and massively hypocritical at the same time.

Kushina whirled around from her cutting board and stabbed her knife in Obito's direction. "A true chef never makes compromises," she said, her eyes narrowing. "Quality over quan—"

Her eyes widened. She snapped her fingers. "Quantity. I'm an idiot."

She formed a cross with her fingers in a very familiar seal, and then the number of redheads in the kitchen suddenly increased a dozen-fold. The noise level skyrocketed, with instructions being given to chop pork slices, peel eggs, ladle soup, and more.

Kakashi's lips twitched. The apple really didn't fall too far from the tree.

Rin, meanwhile, was gaping in awe. "I didn't know you could make so many shadow clones, Kushina! That's amazing! Although, isn't that—isn't that dangerous?"

"Oh, this?" a Kushina chirped. "This is nothing!"

"Thanks, Rin," another Kushina said with a grin.

"Pretty damn useful, eh?" said the one ladling soup.

"It's the Uzumaki blood," the egg-peeling Kushina said proudly.

"Don't worry about me, my chakra reserves are a beast," another boasted.

There was a beat of silence.

All twelve Kushinas collectively flinched, and the room burst into nervous babbling.

"Ah, figuratively, of course—"

"'Beast' as in my reserves are just really huge, haha, right—"

"Figure of speech, you know—"

"Dumb joke, ignore what I said—"

"Kushina," Minato interrupted. "Relax," he said, his expression somewhere between apprehension, exasperation, and fondness.

The Kushinas snapped to attention. "R-right," they said, blinking rapidly. "Uh, back to work then..."

Rin just looked confused.

Obito scrunched his face up. "...Huh?"

Kakashi had been glancing at Obito out of the corner of his eye. Obito, of course, had made no visible tells at Kushina's slip-up, beyond a superficial look of bafflement. Kakashi pursed his lips, feeling sick. Yes, maybe to Obito this was just one giant masquerade, but how could he be so... indifferent? And because Kakashi couldn't leap over the table and throttle him, he settled for catching Obito's eye and shooting him a dark look.

Obito frowned back, but then Kushina plopped down into the chair next to him with a happy sigh, and his expression smoothed over.

Four other Kushina clones skipped over to the table, each placing down a huge, steaming bowl of ramen before popping away in a cloud of smoke.

"Kushina-style miso ramen—my specialty, and the greatest ramen you'll ever have," the remaining Kushina announced. "Eat up, because I made lots."

Obito grinned. "This looks awesome!"

"It really does," Minato said, smiling. Rin made a noise of agreement. Kakashi nodded.

Kushina beamed, and dinner began.

For the most part, Kakashi was content to just sit and eat quietly. Listening. Kushina, rambling on about a "neat-ass bird" she had seen the other day, that had "looked just like you, Minato". Rin, bringing them up to date on all the latest going-ons from her hospital apprenticeship. Minato, endearingly excited as he shared with them recent breakthroughs in his sealing research—this time around, Kakashi could almost understand what his sensei was talking about. And Obito, chattering away about everything and nothing, exactly the cheerful thirteen-year-old that Kakashi had once immortalized him as.

"—So I checked it out, only because everyone kept saying what great ramen they had. 'Fresh', 'original', the posters said. But guess what?" Kushina slammed her hands on the table. "They were using instant noodles! And flavour packets! Any half-decent ramen connoisseur should've been able to tell the difference easily," she sniffed. "Bunch of scammers."

"Revolting, how anyone can stand for such lies," Kakashi said. "What an immoral restaurant."

Kushina looked at him oddly, but nodded her head. "Yeah, I'll probably never go back again."

"'Immoral'?" Obito interrupted. "Those customers were all happy. Can you really blame the restaurant for only trying to make people happy and giving them great ramen?"

"Uh," Rin said, "I'm pretty sure the restaurant's just trying to make money, actually—"

"Because that happiness is fake," Kakashi said strongly. "Those customers were fed lies."

"It's not like they can tell the difference," Obito said, just as vehement. "And in the end, they're satisfied with their food, and that's what matters."

"Kushina can tell the difference, can't she?" Kakashi retorted. "If the restaurant owner was just treating himself to cup ramen, that would be fine. Who am I to judge his poor taste in food?" Obito gave him a dirty look. "But feeding everyone cup ramen, and putting everyone's meals at stake, is unacceptable."

Minato, who looked like he had been zoning out of Kushina's story, was staring at Kakashi like he was an complete stranger, who also happened to be sporting four heads.

"The restaurant's just giving the people what they want. Good ramen!" Obito snapped.

Kakashi glared back. "But it's not good ramen! It's not real, y—they're just lying to everyone!"

"Leaving with a satisfied meal is what's most important!"

"What's most important is to have true ramen, not a cheap substitute!"

Rin, Minato, and Kushina were all gaping. The pork slice between Kushina's frozen chopsticks slipped out and plunked into her bowl. Kakashi ignored them.

Obito took a deep breath. "What problem do you have with cup ramen?" he asked Kakashi, calmer now. "It's just as good as your fancy Ichiraku noodles, and better for everyone in the long term. It's enjoyable, easy to create, and convenient for everyone," he argued.

"Wow," Rin whispered, slightly awed.