《The Life of a Wizard》Real-Life Harem
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So as of right now, I am currently living alongside four beautiful girls that I've summoned through an ancient ritual and a bird.
Now you're probably asking "Ozpin, why do you sound so dissatisfied? Having four beautiful girls competing for your affection sounds like every man's dream."
Hahahahahahahaha!
Is that you think!? Well, here's an example of what that looks like.
"Maaaaaaaaster! Can I borrow your credit card? I wanna buy this new game that just came out!" Ereshkigal yells out from the living room.
Ishtar floats by and starts pinching my cheeks. "Hey old man! I wanna go shopping. This goddess needs new clothes!"
"Husband, there is a bird that is giving me the evil eye. Can I kill it?" Morgan asks as she holds Raven by her neck.
"Gah... ahhh...!" Raven chokes out.
Scáthach is the only one relatively normal among the four girls, acting as the older sister or "mother" of the group though that doesn't mean she doesn't have her quirks. Whenever a problem arises, she takes a neutral standing in the conflict meaning that she wouldn't act or participate and refuses to do anything about it.
In other words, she just sits in a corner and does nothing; a freeloader.
Do you see now? This is what I have to live with everyday.
Nothing short of a nightmare.
Though nothing prepared me for THIS.
I was sleeping on my bed before a weird noise catches my attention, then a sudden warm on my body. When I open my eyes, I was surprised by who is on top of me.
"...You were not supposed to wake up." Morgan said with an annoyed tone.
"What are you doing in my bed?" I asked.
"You are my husband. It is only natural that we would sleep in the same bed." Morgan explains.
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"..." I merely stayed quite for a few minutes. "Please get off me."
Morgan tilts her head. "Am I unattractive?" She then, unexpectedly, fits on my crotch. "How is this?"
"..." I force myself to ignore the soft feeling.
Morgan begins to grind on my crotch. "Does it feel good, husband?"
"... yes." I moan out, unable to contain myself.
"Good." She immediately stands up and and gets off my bed. "I expect an chocolate pancakes and bacon for breakfast. If you fail to deliver or are cold then there will be punishment." She opens the door and leaves my bedroom.
I'm left alone in my bed and the is only one thing on my mind. "What the fuck just happened!?"
"Sis! You used my shampoo again!" Ereshkigal yells out.
"I only used a little." Ishtar replies.
"YOU USED THE WHOLE BOTTLE!"
"And? Just get another one. This goddess needs to maintain her beauty, especially her hair." Ishtar whips her hair.
"Don't you think I need it, too? I have an image to maintain!"
"What image? Your the Goddess of the Underworld, nobody even knows you." Ishtar replies.
"Screw you!" Ereshkigal cries and runs back to her room.
"Hmph, what a crybaby." Ishtar mumbles before turning her attention to me." Whatcha doin'?"
"Making breakfast." I replied.
"Oh? What is it?"
"Chocolate-chip pancakes."
Ishtar groans. "That sweet stuff? At this rate, I'll gain weight in no time."
"You're a goddess, you're physical appearance is eternal thus you'll never gain weight, age, or die. However, if I don't do this, I will suffer a fate WORSE than death." I explained.
Ishtar arches an eyebrow. "Are you seriously afraid of a little mortal like her? Granted, she is stronger than any witch I've met before but this is a bit of a stretch."
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"You don't understand, her stance, her attitude, she reminds me of my ex-wife and if she's anything like her, there WILL be pain if I don't meet her demands." I told her.
Ishtar scoffs and pulls a chair and sits down. "You're so boring." She then sees me placing a cup of tea on the table and pouring tea in it.
"What's this?" Ishtar asks confused.
"Something that I made in the meantime. I rarely make tea, I'm more of a coffee machine really, but I can say that my tea-making skills are pretty good." I said.
Ishtar looks at me before looking down at the tea in front of her. The goddess takes the cup and slowly drinks it.
"!"
It was good, better than good! By Mother, this has to be the best tea she had ever tasted! None of the tributes she has received before cannot even compare to this heavenly substance!
She was in paradise!
"Judging by your expression, I'd say I just hit the jackpot." I smirked.
The Goddess of Beauty realizes the euphoric look she has and looks embarrassed.
"S-Shut up, you idiot!" Ishtar exclaims with a heavy blush on her face.
Adorable. "So what do you want for breakfast today?"
Ishtar ponders for a minute. "I want Miso Croque Madame."
"And I want French Toast with banana slices topped with maple syrup." Ereshkigal yells from her room. "And make it extra crispy!"
"I want Black pudding." Scáthach said from her seat on the table.
The two of us are startled by Scáthach's sudden appearance . "Where did you come from!?"
The Queen of Shadows arches her eyebrow. "I've been here the entire time. Speaking of which, may I have a bit of your tea?"
I sigh and pour her the tea before getting the ingredients. They may be a hassle but the girls certainly made my existence here in Remnant even more interesting.
'Hm... I wonder what Jaune is up to now.' I thought having forgotten about my student and the task I gave him.
"NOTICE ME!!!" Jaune screams out.
"NO!" Weiss yells back.
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Author Notes
I am not dead! I am still here! I've just been in another website.
I have been focusing on my main story in Fanfiction.net since it is reaching a climax (that doesn't mean its ending though, it just mean its reaching the first arc of what I have in store for the book).
There will be another chapter for this soon, so expect that somewhere this week.
As for Interloper, I will not be updating that for a while. I have not started writing and I haven't been playing the game due to a loss of interest, but that doesn't mean I will quit on it, it just means I'll have to use a different source. I've watched FGO movies and I am HOOKED! Hopefully, they give the same treatments to the other arcs in the game.
I am sorry that I just up and vanish without a word, but I am coming back. I just need to manage my time between this website and the other.
Anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter, if you're curious of my main story check it out. Don't hesitate to leave your thoughts here.
Peace~
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