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"So be patient; indeed, the best ending is for the righteous." (Qur'an 11:49)

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Assalaamu 'Alaikum (peace be upon you).

Y'all tired of me yet?

Before I officially wrap this up, I wanted to say a couple (*cough* more than a couple *cough*) words.

I was about eight years old when I first fell in love with writing. I wrote all the time, on anything I could find, whether it was a page ripped out of a notebook or the back of my homework for school. I wrote and I wrote and I wrote. Sometimes my stories didn't even make sense now that I look back at them, but they gave me the greatest joy to write. I would excitedly rush up to my teachers and thrust my stories out to them, waiting with baited breath for their reactions as their eyes skimmed across the pages.

Basically, writing was everything to me.

As I grew up, I continued to write passionately for personal work as well as for academic assignments. Writing wasn't just a hobby — it was a dream.

Fast forward to high school, where I struggled badly with deciding which career I wanted to pursue in the future (if any). My teachers and counselors were constantly trying to help out by assessing my skills and suggesting areas of work to me. I attended seminars and listened to lectures about how it was completely okay not to know which field I wanted to pursue, but still I harbored the constant worry of being unaware of what I wanted for my future.

Of course, I wasn't totally unaware. Ever since I had been a young girl, my ultimate dream had been to become an author. But as I grew up and entered high school, I felt it wasn't plausible in the long run. Not only financially but also because I had no guarantee I would write something groundbreaking. So, putting my dream off to the side, I searched for something more plausible for myself.

In junior year, I finally expressed an interest in psychology. I took psychology classes in both junior and senior year of high school and loved them. That was when I decided I wanted to pursue a career in psychology, preferably focusing on clinical therapy. I wanted Muslims especially to have an outlet to connect with since psychological issues are glaringly prevalent but unfortunately largely overlooked in the Muslim community.

While exploring this new passion, I still stayed invested in writing. I started a poetry account on Instagram, drafted stories on Wattpad, and participated in my high school's Writer's Guild to publish two books with fellow classmates ( which are available on Amazon :) #selfpromotionlol ).

When quarantine hit, I decided that while psychology was cool, I wasn't into it like that anymore and I definitely didn't see myself going into therapy / counseling. And I still wanted to pursue writing as a career. I really wanted to take that step and publicize my writing on Wattpad. I've memorized the Qur'an, Alhamdulillah, and instead of only reading and practicing it, I wanted to try to implement its teachings to the best of my ability. I was terrified, of course, because the idea of trying to spread Islamic knowledge while not being an extremely learned person / scholar was very daunting (not that you can only spread knowledge if you are a scholar). The possibility of saying something wrong and misleading people is very, very real and terrifying. But Allah guided me along the way and helped me, and I pray He accepts it from me.

I was also scared because I tend to have commitment issues. And I didn't want to begin something without the intention of finishing it. But Allah gave me strength, and with a Bismillah I published the first chapter of Journey to Hidaya in April of 2020.

Before Journey to Hidaya, no story I had ever written mattered so much to me. They were all what I would categorize as lighthearted and playful. Nothing too serious. But writing Journey to Hidaya quite literally changed my life. I was so invested in Zoya and Haroun, so eager to develop their characters and write their spiritual journeys, so excited to touch on issues within the Muslim community as well as Islamic concepts I felt were so often overlooked. And overall, I was so excited to take a dare with my writing and improve it as I worked.

What I did not expect, however, was the amount of love and support I received. The beautifully long paragraphs texted to me, the excited comments on each chapter, the eager waiting for the characters' journeys throughout their lives.

You all have been so incredibly warm and encouraging and kind that it has completely overwhelmed me. Sometimes I sit down, baffled, and wonder, "How is it that I am blessed with so much?" It's scary to think of how much love people have showed for Journey to Hidaya and to wonder if its reflective of Allah's opinion of the work. I pray I was able to continue writing for Allah's sake and not for the sake of pleasing others.

A year ago, I was scared to even publish the first chapter for fear that I would not finish the story (as I had done with many previous works).

But a year later, I have (Alhamdulillah) wrapped up Zoya and Haroun's story at many reads and many, many memories with readers.

All I can say is Alhamdulillah. Truly, praise be to Allah. For allowing me to fulfill my dream of being a writer and for allowing that eight year old girl writing on scraps of paper to publish a work that means so much to her.

I will severely miss writing Journey to Hidaya. Even though my next step is to edit the entire story, it's still not the same as writing it the first time. I will miss waking up every morning to draft a new chapter and edit old ones. I will miss going on jogs and randomly thinking of a scene to quickly jot down in the notes section of my phone. I will miss excitedly making aesthetics before publishing each chapter. I will miss writing Farhan and Zoya's banter as well as Haroun and Zoya's playful conversations. I will miss all of the characters so much. This is the price of writing — you pour your heart into your story only to struggle to reclaim it at the end.

But — as Zoya would say — learn to pour your heart to God and only God. Learn to write for the sake of pleasing Him and only Him. And remember that there are no sad endings for those who are with Allah.

Thank you to Allah, without Who I never would have had the ability or the strength to write this story.

Thank you to my parents (especially my mother) and my siblings, for being incredible sources of support.

Thank you to all of you, for your lovely words and your constant support. There are so many of you, and if I mentioned all of you, I would be writing your names endlessly. May Allah reward you.

Thank you especially to these girls, who stuck with me and the story through thick and thin and have accompanied me on this journey from the very start:

for being one of my first readers and one of my first Muslim friends on Wattpad

for her funny comments and her friendship with me and

for offering me her friendship on a silver platter and always allowing me to rant to her

for her kindness, incredibly loving words, and attention to the story

for her sophisticated comments and observations that always made me smile at how much attention she paid

for her kindness and her willingness to help with the story

for being so, so admirable and supportive

for her loving and caring attitude, which made me feel like I had another older sister

for her encouraging words, which meant so much to me

for her dedication to the story and her intelligent observations

for her funny comments and sweet personality

for her hilarious comments that always had me cackling even in the most tense of situations

and

for her sophisticated and encouraging comments as well as her mature persona

Please forgive me if I forgot to mention somebody, but know that you are all incredibly appreciated. May Allah reward you endlessly and grant you the highest level of paradise.

If anything in this story has benefited you, it was from Allah. And if anything wrong was said, it was from myself and my human tendencies and Shaitan.

I pray I was able to keep my intentions pure throughout the entire journey of writing this story. I pray I was able to write for Allah's sake and only His sake. I pray Allah protects your work and my work and everyone's work from the evil eye. And I pray Allah accepts this work from me as a form of sadaqa jaariya (long term charity that benefits one even after death). Ameen.

And with that (*takes a deep breath*), Wasalaam, my beautiful readers.