(Y/N): "Apophis i'm serious, stop it"

For the briefest of moments, the tail currently coiled around your legs loosened its iron-like grip, well that was until you felt the cool, ticklish sensation of hair on the back of your head and your vision became obscured by lavender hair.

Apophis: "Hi serious, i'm dad"

And just like that, any hope you had of escaping this waking nightmare vanished in one swift motion, leaving you utterly gobsmacked. Did she just? no, she wouldn't... right? Having known you for half a year Apophis completely understood (Y/N)'s one weakness (besides armed robbers with bullets), dad jokes. The bane of your existence, your kryptonite, your one fatal flaw and she used it against you... and now you are completely powerless against her... or so she thinks.

Apophis: "Ha, works like a charm. Damn, remind me to thank Monic when we get back"

After the utterance of these words her grip on your legs slowly starts to increase, constricting your movements once again. Sensing this as your one opportunity you act.

(Y/N): "Apophis"

You say this silently and with baited breath, awaiting her to fall right into your trap. And it worked, like a charm. The snake lady motions herself to your front, where she places herself on your lap.

Apophis: "Yes, Romeo?"

Bingo.

(Y/N): "... SURPRISE ATTACK"

In one quick and precise motion you manage to free yourself of your constraints and startle the goddess, giving you your golden opportunity to attack. With rapid succession you free yourself from her grasp and stand up, unwittingly causing her to fall backwards, and on reaction grab you. Great.

(Y/N): "Heh, whats a lady like you doing in a place like this?"

Apophis: "Ugh, that does it."

Upon saying this she firmly grabs your by the throat and brings your face down to hers, capturing and locking your lips in a forced, yet passionate kiss. Yikes, you didn't see that one coming aye?.

And that's where you stayed for what seemed like a millennia but in fact was a mere minute. The embrace was hot and passionate, yet had a heartfelt undertone like she had been waiting a long time to do it. Finally managing to wiggle yourself free, you take in a huge gasp of air, and just stare into her eyes, dumbfounded.

(Y/N): "..."

Apophis: "...."

(Y/N): "....."

Apophis: "......"

(Y/N): "........"

(Y/N): "Wow."

Apophis: "You don't understand how long I've been waiting to do that."

(Y/N): "Your telling me huh.. i had no idea you felt like, like that "

Apophis: "Obviously. Maybe its because you're completely oblivious to all social cues given by not just me, but all the girls in the house, including Scathach. But hey, it worked in my favour because now i've marked whats rightfully mine"

(Y/N): "What's rightfully yours?! I didn't realise I was an inanimate object to be passed around from girl to girl."

Apophis: "Yup, now get used to it because I've marked you"

(Y/N): "Marked me how? I don't understa-"

You immediately cut yourself off as you look down to your bare torso, to a newly formed "tattoo" that had magically appeared onto your right side, oddly resembling a snake eye.

Apophis: "Now I can sense you from wherever you are"

She shoots your a sweet yet sinister grin upon saying this. Oh great.

(Y/N): "So what? I'm under mystical house arrest? And anyways how the fuck did you do that? Since when do you have powers?"

Apophis: "I don't, let's just say I 'borrowed' it from Scathach's room."

Outstanding move.

(Y/N): "Ugh whatever, at this point I don't know what to say. For all I know there's an invisible cat girl who also likes me and to be quite frank it wouldn't phase me after all the shit I've witnessed in this past year. Let's just get going so I can finally sleep in my own bed again..."