It's very hard to sit and let everything pass through you

It feels very lonely to sit on one place and seeing others move so fast

when you have nothing to do and just you want is to spend your time nicely but nothing comes in your mind

Your hobbies, likes and dislikes all seems to be in vain, when your usual schedule is broken into pieces

Why it is like that, when we are busy we have thousands things to distract us but when we got free all distractions fades away

It's true distractions, love , friendship,health, misery, dreams everything is like a fog of mind which will stay until a strong wind of reality doesn't enters in your life, and blows away the fog and leave you in your truth

Right now, i am so free that my mind is running wild, i am loosing my emotions, i don't have any control on myself, is this how old and retired people feel

Suddenly i want to work hard again, not quantitatively but qualitatively, why is it so hard to start rescheduling your life like it was earlier

I just feel like a dry tree whose all leaves are already fallen, and i am crying my eyes out while looking at my fallen leaves.

My eyes are swollen by all these infinite tears that i didn't even get to see the beauty of a dry trees in winter

I am so much eager for spring that i didn't found out the beauty of winter before it ended

But you know what hurts me the most that i didn't feel to fall on winter it falls in the end of summer. i am about to end my teenage life and going to enter adult stage

And i didn't throw away my leaves, all those spring flowers who become summer fruits are thrown away

My summer breeze is awaken soon there will be rain and i will have new green leaves instead of beautiful flowers, i will have a rainbow instead of warm wind

I hate leaving my spring , early summer and mid summer behind, now there will be my late summer for preparing myself so that i will not be drenched in rain