《Ancient's Smashing Reviews》King Eden by RowanCarver
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Prepare for have the smashing pulled out from under ya!
Going into this story I was given high expectations, pretty much from the start. You got an interesting title promising power, authority, drama, politics, war, a Bible Reference that is both a nice name for a person and a possible representation of the idea of eden, as Eden is as much an idea of being in a good place with God as much as it was a literal place at one point, a place where heaven and earth intersect. You got a picture that is beautifully drawn and while I don't mind cute and colorful characters, I find the dark and gritty picture to go great with the title, and then you have an apocalyptical summary at the table of contents page. All of this combines themes to show a story taken seriously and knows what it wants. Some of my friends on the discord told me they knew the author at one point and thought it was good. Then you read the Author's Notes where she lays it out, plain and simple, of what to expect. Action. Stupid fun. Epic scenes. Taking inspiration from not only the most intelligently written and introspective anime's in the 90s, but also some of the stupidest, funniest, most action packed from the same decade and one of my personal favorites: Dragon Ball.
I'm sold. And I haven't even read the first word yet.
It's nice to know what this story expects from itself, and so I plan to set my review accordingly. I half-way expect the narrative and plot to be messy and sacrificed on the altar of sheer stupid epicness and juicy action, and if so, that's fine.
The story is structured by volume, then by issues, then by chapter. This is highly structured and I like it. The 'issues' have a slight episodic feel to them with their own arcs and subplots, no doubt having taken inspiration from anime. I do not know how long the story plans to be, as three new chapters were released today, but with how long the story is I felt it fair to read two issues, comprising almost half of the current story. If I had more time, sure I can continue, but I'm a busy person and don't want this taking half a year. I'll probably continue reading on my own, but at this point I think I have seen enough to be able to do a review at the very least.
So lets get to it.
TLDR; Alucard (Hellsing Ultimate Abridged) and Handsome Jack meets Mad Max: Custody Edition.
Overall I'd rate it 4 smashing out of 5! Its strengths outweigh its weaknesses.
Main Character - Smashing! - The MC is right there on the border between a good kind of mary sue and purely absurd stupid fun; and by sheer willpower and mouth-watering and juicy action gives the story easily 90-95% of its value. To explain this: She is overpowered to a level matched only by Alucard. Yet, unlike many stories that take this absurd power and fail to make anything out of it, there is a little bit of tension behind it. The source of her power is in taking an absurd amount of anime steroids where, if she reaches her limit, will turn her into a monster just as powerful, then we all doomed, and her ambition is based on rescueing someone who is delicate. She doesn't know her limit, we don't know her limit, and her ambition doesn't give her room to question when it is. Just go go go! Half of the fun is in her getting impaled with random objects, like chair, and making sass out of it because it doesn't amount to shit at the moment, but yet every scratch and mosquito bite could be the last thing needed to trigger the deadly side effect of the drugs. This tension is made all the more real when you meet someone who does cross that limit and she has to contend with one of the very monsters she could become. Bravo. She also apparently is the smartest person around, leads one of the biggest baddest nations with the most intellectuals and biggest armies, has taken 5-6x more anime steroids than any other warlord, and is like super charismatic. Normally when you have a story where the MC has all of her stats maxed and is the biggest, baddest, smartest, whatever-est around, then its stupid and not in a good way and I hate mary sues. But this story avoids that by embracing the absurdity, making the strengths come from a logical place that has just as big of a side effect weakness and tension, and rather than sitting there and stopping to think about it, just keeps going. Don't think about it! Just punch the robot!
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In terms of personality she is sassy, cocky, a lone wolf, and acts like she cares about others while at the same time hurting them. She is a bit of a stereotype, but it fits with the absurdity of power and juicy action that is constantly around. She would fit in a dragon ball story or A-Team film with its stupid one-liners just fine.
The tension is assisted by another MC, whom you never actually meet, but is always around. He reminds me of Handsome Jack for the sense of power and constant presence, though lacks the humor. He simply sends messages out every couple chapters filled with promises and hope while he nukes you into oblivion and hunts everyone in flagrant genocide. He strikes me as the main villain, he gives a LOT to the world building by his presence and background actions, and I hope he lives up to his potential or the ending may fall a bit flat.
Side Characters - Semi-Smashing - The strength of the side characters vary from person to person, but for the most part they do their job. Thief is fun to have around and gives more meaning to stuff as with the MC's absurd power, there is a sidekick who isnt as strong she has to watch out for. Bravo. Thief also has skill sets the MC needs, and isn't so bad at everything else herself. The other side characters thus far aren't as good, because they aren't near as fleshed out. Esspecially the kid.
The kid is the biggest weakness right now I can see in the story. I mean, he does his job. He is the mcguffin. Everyone wants him because... well they all want him. The reasons work fine. The father wants him for his own reasons, that work. The villain wants him for his own reasons, that work. And the MC wants him for her own reasons... that almost work. I say almost work because her reasons aren't near as fleshed out as the others and is a flaw in the story. I'll explain later.
Grammar and Word Usage - Smashing WITH BLOOOOOOOD! - The grammar is fine. Seems edited. No issues that held me back. The story reads well. Then you have the word usage... which is the most graphic fighting I have ever read. When she punches things, there is blood and guts. I mean, I shit you not, she tears open a monster, jams her elbow into its organs, reaches in so far as her elbow, grabs another person by the hair (who happens to be inside), rips him out of the monsters body... and then shoots him in the face. Every punch, every fall, every blow, every bullet, is followed by enough visuals and explosions and blood for this story to easily be rated R for gore. yet another reason I compare the MC to Alucard because wow that is a bloody show. It is graphic, embraces the absurd and overpowered nature of the MC as she punches everything, and puts her shoulder deep, literally, in blood and guts. You got skyscrappers collapsing on her, bar fights, abominable monsters made entirely of sown together flesh and blood, huge lasers, and enough eye candy and stupid fighting to make you drool in full 4k graphic detail.
World Building - Smashing! - The world building is done in an interesting way. There is some information dumping, there is some showing, and there is a narrator villain making speeches on the 'situation' of the world while offering hope away from it, very much giving a Handsome Jack feel with the constant presence. Overall nicely done. The story doesn't overly rely on any one style but mixes them up as necessary. The various villains contribute brilliantly as they bring their own unique strengths to the 'wars' and friction playing out. Some are with limitless and advanced sci-fi armies, others have tamed monsters, others are monsters, others sound like they are manipulators, and etc. I expected the world building to be sacrificed in the name of stupid fun and mind-numbing action, but that isn't the case as the world building offers an intelligent, thought out, and well done sandbox for the MC to play around in and smash stuff. If this was a video game it would be like Shadow of War where when you take a few minutes off from killing orcs in millions of ways you can realize how well done the world is around you.
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Plot - Semi-Smashing - Overall I expected, and made the prediction, that something would be sacrificed in the name of pure, unadulterated, unfiltered, stupid, juicy, action. I was right. The plot isn't exactly deep or hard to understand. Its not something that takes much thought to figure out. It is backed up well by amazing world building, so it works quite well.
If anything, the plot is exactly what it needs to be. It needs to be, as Captain Jack Sparrow says, "I like it. Simple, easy to remember." The story relies on its action and world building, and the plot just gives you an excuse to have more action in it. If the story had tried to go for something huge and indepth and thought provoking and complicated as, say, Game of Thrones, I don't think it would have managed to work.
The plot is simple. You got the stuff I described in the world building, you have an overpowered as shit MC on a ticking timebomb, you have a highly structured story with several subplots (which each work fine), but at the core of it all is a core plot. A single thread tieing it all together is the quest to reclaim her son.
And this is where it unravels at the seems a bit.
The quest is to reclaim a mcguffin VIP. When you meet him, the kid is drugged up. So he has the personality of a sack of potatoes. Doesn't even have a single line that I remember. There is no moment between the characters. There is no flashback. There is no taking the time to think about why they are in the situation that they are, no regret for abandonment, no dreams of a time together... nothing. There is no emotional connection. So... the whole overaching plot quest is just go after random person who 'happens' to be son of MC. Why does she give a shit? Well... reasons. Not really explored. So why should we care? I know he is a kid and all but through everything I've read I find myself caring less about him and more about the kingdom she 'supposedly' runs, yet abandons just as much as him. I care more about the random kid to now be drinking monster-guts through the faucet because MC messed up than about her drugged up kid dragged to Mars.
As mentioned before, everyone else but the MC has a more developed purpose with the mcguffin kid. The father sees his son as the ticket to freedom and a better life. The villain sees the kid as a cure or experiment. What does the mother see him as? Don't know. Don't care. Just keep punching things. Because reasons.
This ultimately has a result that, as juicy and awesome as the quest is, as much tension as there is in her stake as a ticking time bomb, there is no weight behind it to drive everything forward with clear purpose. Like, as much as the mother abandons him and everyone else in her life, why would the reader think the kid will have a better life with her going forward than with the Mars people? Is she just going to abandon him or sell him to get another fix? I know the story answers those questions, but it doesn't back up the answer with there being an actual connection between them, nor a true honest-to-god desire for a family between them. Its just "my kid is on mars. lets go." "anything else you wanna say?" "nope, not really. lets go. no time to think."
Beyond this kid-quest, the rest of the plot and story is really more about interactions between the various world-built elements as she goes step by step towards the Mcguffin. Its interesting that the world building is so deep and interwoven that merely existing in the WB acts as the plot itself for most of it.
There are other issues in the plot/WB, but they are so insignificant, exist for such a short time, and are so easily ignored if you aren't paying attention, that it isn't worth going into on a review like this. If the author wants to know, I can tell her briefly over private messages, but thats about all they warrant. Much of the story is about turning your brain off and just enjoying the gore and punching, and sometimes a slightly flawed story is better than one where too much effort is put into being absolutely perfect and choking the fun as a result.
Overall if the relationship between the sack-of-potatoes and MC is more fleshed out, the story will fix the one true issue I could find.
I'm out with a smashing!
If you are interested in learning to write, mastering the craft, want some really good reads, or just to chat and hang out with a mature group of adults, feel free to hit me up for a smashing discord book club that has lasted years.
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