A/N: This chapter has SPOILERS for those who haven't finished the manga, ANGST and FOUL LANGUAGE!

And yes, I know it's sort of OOC to have Juuzou NOT kill his s/o because they're a ghoul, but he didn't kill Uta when he impersonated Shinohara, so it sort of makes sense, if he and his s/o have been together for a long time, no?

You ran. You hadn't ran this fast in... Well, you never ran this fast in your life before.

It was a super bad idea to come to this gathering and you knew it, you should have followed your instincts and stayed home to finish your boyfriend's paperwork, but noooo, little (Y/N) here had to go out and get themselves in trouble because working for the CCG isn't dangerous enough.

Not to mention if you came across anyone from the office and they recognize you, down goes the Washuu clan. Not that you'd mind, really. You never liked them or V for that matter, but still... You'd die, and that wasn't in your bucket list.

You quickly turned the last corner, stopping in your tracks at the human standing right in front of the exit you were planning to use.

"Aw, did ghoul-chan want to escape?" The male said, his cold and mocking tone sending shivers through your body. You stood still, keeping your distance from your boyfriend as he stalked towards you, Jason in his right hand. You really didn't want to know what that blade would feel like stabbing you... "Are you scared? Don't be!"

You lowered your kagune as he approached, determined not to lay a hand on him, even though he couldn't even see your face thanks to your mask. You'd figure a way to get through without harming him, and you'll go back to work tomorrow as if nothing ever happened! Right?

"Not much of a talker, huh? That's alright, I'll help you with that!" Juuzou leaped forward, bringing his quinque behind him to attempt to hit you with it, but luckily your reflexes were fast enough, so you dodged the attack by a few centimetres.

"Let's see how loud I can make you scream, hmm?"

Oh god, why did that scare you as much as it did?

You didn't have much time to figure it out. You were primarily focused on not dying by the hands of your boyfriend, so fear was simply an afterthought right now.

Suzuya swung his quinque at you one more time while you were distracted by your thoughts and you felt the weapon hit your mask, sending it tumbling a few meters away.

"Fuck." You muttered, backing off and keeping your gaze on the ground as if that would help you stay incognito.

Juuzou stopped abruptly, lowering his quinque once his eyes fell on you.

"(Y/N)?" He asked, disbelieving. There was no way it could be you, right? You worked at the CCG, you can't be a ghoul! Maybe it was just a look alike.

The remaining of Suzuya's hope was crushed once you finally gained the courage to make eye contact with him. There's no one else that could have those very same (e/c) eyes and hold those exact feelings inside them. It was you, no doubt about it.

"But... What? How?" He questioned, dropping his weapon to the ground. Fuck fighting. He wasn't about to kill the only (conscious) person who loved him for who he was. "Why?"

"I'm sorry..." You said, heart breaking for him. "I just... I want to feel human so badly, Juuzou." It was the truth. Sometimes, you got so into your role as his assistant and as his lover that you made yourself believe that you were completely human and not a flesh eating monster. "I'm so sorry that I had to be this."

Juuzou looked you from head to toe, confused about everything. He trusted you, and he thought you trusted him. You had been his support through everything. The two of you were like two veterans. You both were so close, so why did you never say anything? Why did he never notice anything? Just... why? Why was life so cruel towards the two of you?

Suzuya shook his head. "Don't be, you weren't the one to chose to be born a ghoul, right?"

You frowned at his words. Where was the Juuzou from just a minute ago? Where was the CCG's Jason? Why was he acting so... Loving? Especially towards a ghoul. Was this just a way to toy with your heart before he brutally killed you?

"I... No, but I still lied to you! For years! Aren't you mad?"

"A bit." He shrugged, finally arriving at arm's length to you. "But I'd miss you too much if I killed you. Who else will tolerate me if you're gone?"

With that, he closed the distance between the two of you, hugging you with all his might and burying his face in your neck, inhaling your scent. It still smelled the very same. "I don't want you gone, too." He added, albeit in a much quieter tone.

You sighed before hugging back. "As long as you want me, I'll be there." You assured. "I'm sorry I had to be this way."

"It's..." The male glanced at your kagune, before shutting his eyes. Human or ghoul, you were (Y/N), and he loved you. "It's alright. After all, you love me for me, so I love you for you, kagune and all!"

You hugged the investigator closer, smiling softly. "Thanks, Juuzou. I love you so much."

"Hey, listen. There's no one after the exit there. If you don't attract too much attention to yourself, you could probably get back home with no problem." Your boyfriend explained, still hanging onto you for dear life. "I'll see you tomorrow at work, okay?"

"See you tomorrow, Juuzou." You answered, taking in a deep (and much needed) breath of air, releasing Juuzou and giving him a confident smile. "I'll live, no worries."

You cupped the man's cheeks, leaning forwards to place a chaste but loving kiss on his lips before rubbing your nose against his, causing him to giggle at your actions. He always liked eskimo kisses, and this one seemed to calm down his nerves a bit.

You pulled away, causing Juuzou to whine at the lack of contact. You stifled a laugh at his antics before waving goodbye and heading towards the exit until the man's voice echoed once again through the room. You stopped in your tracks.

"And also," You turned around to look at him, curious about what he had to say. "You know that if someone else finds you, I won't be able to jump in and save you, right?"

"I know, I'll be careful." You assured, giving him a warm smile and walking out.

••••

"Hm, where's (Y/N)?" Juuzou asked, slightly confused when he walked in and didn't hear your cheerful voice greet him like usual.

"Don't know, maybe they called in sick today." Mizurou shrugged. "But you gotta hear what happened to Abara, Suzuya-san! You'll be really proud!"

"They were bound to be sick today." Mikage added, slightly distracted.

"Hm, alright..." The squad leader said, still unsure. If you were sick, you would have called him to let him know, no? Even then, can ghouls get sick..? Well, maybe you just ate human food... Yeah, that's probably what happened. You told you had a tendency to forget you were a ghoul sometimes, so it would make sense. "What's going on, Hanbee?"

"He got a new quinque." Nakarai explained. "It's pretty cool, too. It's sort of like the ones Mado has."

"Oh, wow! You took the ghoul on without me, Hanbee?" Juuzou teased. "I didn't know you were capable of something like this! How'd it happen?"

The tall man turned to him, a proud smile on his face. "I was walking back home yesterday and I walked upon a ghoul cannibalizing on one of his kind. I managed to put it down, and I might have ruined his kakuhou, but the other's kagune was intact!" He quickly explained. "They were way beyond recognition, but I still managed to call up a back up squad and save the kakuhou."

"Oooh!" Juuzou exclaimed. "Can I see it?" He (whined) asked.

Hanbee nodded before gripping the suitcase in his hand tightly, pressing a button and unleashing the powerful kagune.

It made Juuzou's heart stop. He glanced at the very familiar kagune, barely managing to keep his facade together.

There was no way.

••••

**Flashback**

"(Y/N)?" You turned your head towards your boyfriend, humming loudly as a way to ask him what he wanted. The boy finished the last of the cheesecake you bought him before walking towards you and collapsing next to you on the couch. "Can I touch your kagune and see you kakugan?" He asked nonchalantly.

You choked on your spit and had to sit up correctly to avoid dying. Once your coughing was minimalized, you looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. "Why?"

"Because it's pretty, silly!" He exclaimed, as if you questioning his logic was stupid.

"Yeah, but I'd look like a monster, no? If I let out my kagune and kakugan, I wouldn't even look human anymore."

"So? I want to see the real you!" Juuzou insisted, making you sigh.

"I don't know..." You stated, eyes averting. "Isn't it sort of... Unsettling?"

"Not at all." Suzuya said, frowning. "Are you uncomfortable with it?"

"Not exactly, I just... I don't want to scare you or intimidate you, or make you think I'm dangerous." You explained.

"I won't think badly of you!" He promised. "But I really want to see it!" He grabbed your hand, giving you the best puppy dog eyes he could muster up. "Please..?"

"Fine."

Juuzou cheered as you got up from the couch, eyes shifting from white and (e/c) to black and red. You looked at him, waiting for him to jump back, to widen his eyes in fear, to reach for his quinque, yet noting happened. He simply smiled brightly at you, his gaze never leaving your usually intimidating eyes until you finally let your kagune rip through your back.

"Satisfied?" You asked, surprised when the man jumped up and gasped in awe.

"Can I touch it?" He asked, eyeing your kagune like it was the most magical thing he had ever seen.

"Just be careful, I don't want you to get cut." You warned, shivering when you felt his hand land on it. Juuzou giggled and smiled.

"It's warm!" He said, placing his other hand on the organ. "And it's so pretty! It suits you really well."

"Thanks, Juuzou." You answered, smiling at him. How were you so lucky? How were you so blessed to have a man like him in your life?

"I don't think I'll ever forget a kagune like this..."

••••

"Can I... Look at it?" He asked, quickly scurrying closer once his right hand man gave him his consent, staring at the quinque. It couldn't be yours. It couldn't. You said you'd stay out of trouble, you wouldn't have done that. "It's super cool!" Juuzou said before backing away. "I need to go call (Y/N) though, but congrats Hanbee!"

With that, the male speed walked out of the room, hand quickly diving into his pocket to retrieve his phone and contact you. You'd pick up for sure. You'd apologize and explain to him that you were sick. The quinque he saw was not your kagune. His subordinate did not find you getting eaten by a ghoul.

His fear only worsened when you didn't pick up your phone. He then tried your home phone. Nothing. He texted you, but you never answered there either.

Ignoring the calls from his squad, Suzuya decided to go check your apartment himself. Maybe you were just too weak to get to the phone.

"(Y/N)?" He called out once he unlocked your door with the spare key you had given him a few days after he learnt about your true identity.

No answer yet again.

"(Y/N), it's really funny, Hanbee has a new quinque and it looks just like your kagune! Although yours is still prettier, it's a close second!" The boy said, walking around your apartment, desperately searching for you. "Are we playing hide and seek?"

No answer.

"Alright, I'll find you!" He sang out. "I'm super good at these games!" Skipping around, Juuzou checked just about everywhere for you, yet there was nothing that could indicate your whereabouts.

As long as you weren't in that suit case Hanbee was currently carrying around, everything was just fine.

"Hm, you're super good today, (Y/N)!" Suzuya yelled out. "You win, I give up!"

He waited for another few minutes for you to show up, but you never did.

How much longer could he still pretend that he wasn't worried sick about you? How much longer did he have before that fire would engulf him and burn him into a sobbing and mourning mess? Not much longer.

"(Y/N), I'm getting super worried..." Suzuya nervously giggled, passing by your kitchen again and looking around for anything that would look like a clue.

He frowned once he noticed a sticky note on the counter and approached to read it.

'Gone to eat, should be back soon. Love you Juuzou ;P'

He glanced under, where the date and time was written. You wrote that yesterday night.

You were out hunting yesterday night.

A shaky hand reached out for the note but stopped halfway, afraid that if he'd touch it, the reality would completely settle in.

"(Y/N)..." Juuzou whispered, as if that would bring you back.

The burning feeling of fear and misery settled in, scorching his insides. How long has it been since he had felt pain like this? Ever since Shinohara, no? But why was it so much more painful?

His fingers finally touched the stiff paper and he brought the last thing you had left for him close to his chest, a broken sob escaping him. Why was it that he always lost the people he loved? The people that loved him?

How many things did he regret in that single moment? Way too many.

It hurt him so much to know that he won't see you anymore. He won't wake up next to you on the weekends, he won't drag you out in the streets of Tokyo, he won't hear you greet him as soon as he stepped in the office, he won't get to kiss you, to hug you, to nuzzle into your neck and breath in that scent he loved so much. And all because...

'You know that if someone else finds you, I won't be able to jump in and save you, right?'

Oh, how he had jinxed himself. But was what he had told you true? In a way, it was. You had accidentally gotten into trouble and he wasn't there to save you, but...

If he was there yesterday,

And you were lying in front of him, barely alive,

No matter who was with him, it could be Arima himself,

Juuzou would have jumped in and saved you.