'Hello New York!' I screamed inside my head, since I was too shy to express my enthusiasm out loud. The idea of having all eyes on me, judging my excitement, didn't seem so comforting, and I was already scared enough. 

The large corridors in the airport, with its high ceilings and bright windows made me feel like a spec of dust, small, almost invisible, in the middle of such representation of modern-city life. Everyone appeared to be in a hurry, so confident of their steps and directions, pulling their suitcases all over the place. Some smiling faces complimented me while looking for their own path. However, overall, I felt unnoticed, almost trivial. 

Back in Alpine, I could barely walk two minutes without running into someone I knew. Some would just pull me aside for a small talk, others wanted a friend to vent their recent worries. No matter the reason, amicable faces were always welcoming me. I didn't realize I would miss the feeling of being welcomed, but here, I had no one waiting for me. My new home, a small studio that I will be sharing with strangers, seemed like an image of a cold night in the winter. I barely made it out of JFK and my confidence was gone, leaving behind traces of the old Olivia.

'You can do it, Olivia. It has not even been 20 minutes since you landed in New York and are you already freaking out? Pull yourself together. Breathe! C'mon, breathe deeply' I said to myself, trying to control my emotions the best I could. Without noticing, I was in the middle of a corridor, immobile, taking a deep breath, when someone ran into me, making me fall on the floor. 

I groaned loudly, opening my eyes reluctantly. My left hand had a cut from stopping my fall, and my shoulders were so sore due the impact with the floor. A warm dense liquid started dripping from my hand, making me move my right fingers to wipe it. That's when I noticed my hand was bleeding. "Gosh, What the Hell!" My voice sounded more like a moan, revealing my pain.

"Excuse me!" An assertive voice cut through my thoughts, as if she was disagreeing with the situation. Her reaction made me focus on something more than my pain. A tall woman was facing her phone, holding it in one hand while fixing her skirt with the other. She was not looking at me, worrying more about her clothes and hair than the girl laying on the floor. I was incredulous by such crudity. 

I tried to stand up, still bleeding, feeling a mix of emotions much beyond pain. "Excuse me", I repeated, my voice now more steady. She looked at me with her elongated amber eyes. Even though they were appealing, inviting me to keep staring, her gaze was fierce, as if she was questioning me. My confidence, which was already shattered, couldn't deal with that challenge, and I averted my gaze from her, glancing now at my suitcase on the floor. 

She cut me with her rough voice, in a tone that gave me an impression of an impetuously busy personality with no time to spend with frivolities. "I assume you are fine, since you are bending to get your baggage. No broken bones, or light headedness, correct?" She said in a hurry, ready to leave me as if I was nothing. I felt so humiliated and small. First, she was the one that hit me, and second, she was not even sorry or worried about me. 

'Who does she think I am to treat me like this? Is this how New York's people behave?' An anger started boiling inside my stomach with such fervor that I thought I could slap her in the face and not even feel bad about it, but I knew I couldn't. Confrontations was never easy for me. My head would plan everything, phrases, reactions, gestures, but in the end I always stood there, in complete silence. 

The image of Mia appeared in front of me, staring, with an expression that said 'I knew you couldn't survive in the big city'. Was that my fear taking the shape of one of the people I love the most? I could not let my old self win. I am building something new, and, for that, I need to face myself.

With all the strength left in me, which was almost nothing, a thick voice was projected from my mouth: "No, I am not fine. Are you blind or what? Can't you see I am bleeding? Besides, you were the one that ran into me, making me crash on the floor. Shouldn't you be at least more apologetic?" My heart was racing in my chest, my eyes closed, incredulous by my reaction.

My right hand was on my luggage, squeezing the handle. I did the best I could to avoid eye contact with her, but her glance was so magnetic. No one would never be able to ignore this woman, and she knew that. I had to gather all my strength for my words, for my posture, to not look so intimidated by her. A silent war was established between us. Her eyes were inspecting me, not moving from me, as if she was expecting me to accept defeat. I dove into her eyes, trying to read the woman behind such unpleasant behavior. 

She was fierce, but I couldn't ignore the glint of curiosity shining from her amber, sensuous, gaze. A warm sensation traveled up my spine, making me feel even more confused. In the end, she won, and I couldn't just keep standing there. All my body was warm, 'Is that anger? Is my body so boiled from displeasure?'

Now, I just wanted her to go and leave me alone. I gave her my back, trying to contain my hand bleed. Although she didn't move a millimeter, I could feel her icy eyes on my back, as if she was making a hole on my skin. Avoidance was not the answer, and I've already gone too far to chicken out now. As I was getting ready to face her one more time, I heard her speaking on the phone. 

Her raved voice said: "I already explained it to you, if you don't have enough intelligence to understand what I am saying, whose fault is that?" She fumed, ending the call and putting her phone in her bag. "What is happening today? All the stupid people in the universe decided to cross my path? " She was loud, but her voice was contained. 'Is she talking to me?' 

A cynical smile was drawn on my lips involuntarily, noticed by her, and she responded with a unpleasantly skeptical look. 'How many times will this woman make me feel so irrelevant in such short amount of time? Give me a break', I took a choppy breath, moving my arms, ready to tell her to get out of my way.

Despite my intention to shout out some confident words and leave her without reaction, she took a deep breath, and with no apologies, she looked me up and down. I knew she was judging me based on how I was dressed; compared to her, I probably looked homeless. I decided to do the same, taking the opportunity to actually look at her.

I knew she was beautiful based on my previous glances, but I had never seen someone so sophisticated. All her features, including her long, delicate, but defiant nose, made her look elegant. For me, I could swear she was an European actor. It probably didn't matter what clothes she dressed in, everything she wore would look like as if it was straight out of a fashion magazine. 

She was wearing a camel blazer, a little oversized, belting it to cinch her waist. Her long curvy legs were covered by white tapered wool pants, sending the observers a message of elegance. Her high heels made her that much taller. Her wardrobe made me feel intimidated. With an accent that I couldn't decode, I knew she wasn't American. This was something that her perfect features and dark luxurious hair already gave away. 

"You seem perfectly fine to me. Honestly, I am in a hurry and I can't waste another second here." She said, now with a modulated voice, but still arrogant. The same way she appeared on my life, she disappeared. Rushing away from my view, making me wonder what just happened. Her perfume lingered in the air, as proof of that insane encounter. The essence permeated all my surrounding with a bitter taste that provoked my senses and reminded me the hot effect of spices.

 'Is that how you want to welcome me, universe?' I thought while walking away from the airport.

Can things get worse?

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