I will not write a poem for anyone else but me

and the dawn

and the sizzling feeling of not having enough words to explain how you affected me.

I will not guilt you into anything more than you guilt myself into,

I will not try to sleep an hour more so that our thoughts may connect with the illusion of morning fog.

I will not try to recollect all that has been spilled over the carpet,

my bruises are yet to heal but will not try to resemble the universe,

beautiful and profound.

I will not seek a thread leading me to you.

I will not allow my body to move closer over the silk linen

stretching

tipsy over the touch only you can provide

alone

comfort leaking over the edges,

the low rumble of inside thunder,

the wave of the first light covering this,

this delicate bond that is waiting to be broken.

I will not cause myself anymore pain,

a mysterious force would pull me towards the sea

but I will not budge.

I would wait for the calm,

for another break of the day

when all I do when I wake is get up.

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//December 2017//