Chapter Five – Every Kiss Begins with Kate

Brown Eyes – Destiny's Child

"How's Kate?"

"Kate?"

He took a moment, "The baby." He said with a tone so sardonic it was as if we had previously agreed on the name and I had a lapse in memory.

I rolled my eyes, "Stationary." There was a pause. "It means still, Ethan."

"I knew that, Smarty-guy pants," he chided, "I was just trying to picture her sitting."

I sighed heavily, "When are you going to grow a brain?"

"When we visit Oz so I can formally request one."

I scoffed lightly with a slight chuckle, shaking my head slightly, "You're really a deck of cards."

"How so?"

"Because you never know what you're gonna get with you."

He snickered into the receiver, "I'm an Ethan-igma."

I rolled my eyes, picking up the book I that sat on my bed and scanned its cover.

It was a painting of a woman with crystal blue eyes, a dress as white as snow and pale skin to match.

The title 'FRIENDLY ENCOUNTERS'.

I stole it from mom's collection of books on her shelf in the study when she was yelling at me for something that I can't remember. I knew her Well enough to know that I wouldn't win an argument with her so I did the next best thing. I moved something out of its normal position. That will drive her straight to the nearest nut house.

"Hey, you still there?"

"...Yeah, I was just reading a book."

He scoffed, "Well, sorry if I'm boring you!" he blared.

"Keep your voice down!" I whisper-yelled. "We're not supposed to be speaking, remember?" I looked towards the door and waited to see if anyone would barge in and once neither mom nor dad did, I eased and returned my attention back to the phone.

"Sorry."

I sighed, "It's okay, dude."

There was a pause. "Hey, have you thought about the Halloween thing since your mom poured that icy water on us last night?"

I shivered, "Don't remind me of that, please." I cringed, "And it's been at the back of my mind, I guess." I paused this time. "Why?"

"I think you should talk about it, come over?"

I huffed, "I can't, remember? My parents basically have me in chains."

"Lie."

"They aren't gullible, Ethan."

"Please," he scoffed, "I've seen you lie to cops to get us out of situations."

I bit my lip. "Fine." I said but it didn't come without the feeling of immediate regret.

"Great, see you in thirty."

"E?" I said hastily before he had the chance to hang up. He didn't answer back but I knew he was listening, "Why are you so antsy to talk about last Halloween?"

"I just want to get it out of the way and clear my head."

"Clear your head of what?"

"You'll know when you get here. Now bye."

I exhaled, "Fine." I mumbled and hung up.

I placed the cordless phone on the night stand and grabbed my jacket. I tried making up my bed but got distracted by the book that sat on its edge.

I picked it up and traced the book edges before slowly opening it to the first chapter.

My eyes scanned at the opening line:

"Friendship often ends in love but love in friendship – never." I repeated, softly.

I knew that quote. By whom was where the blur came in.

But it was as if God was trying to tell me something – Him or some unknown author. Either way, it was something that I should have taken more seriously...something that I should have heeded but I just wanted to get this whole lingering Halloween thing out of my mind.

"Damn it," I whispered, "Ethan."

I dropped the book back on the bed and threw the jacket over my shoulder before exiting my room, closing the door behind me.

I tried to be as inconspicuous as possible while I was exiting but of course Mom's hawk eyes caught me rushing past the dining room.

"Stop right there, Spencer."

I huffed and spun around to face her, still in her work clothes but hair tied up in a cloth, "What mother?"

She placed a hand at her waist, "Where are you going?"

"Practice."

"For what?"

I exhaled loudly and crossed my eyes for added, comedic effect, "Junior Prom rehearsal."

"At eight at night?"

"It started at six but I'm going late."

She gave me a skeptical look but it waved it off, "I'll be back at ten."

She huffed but complied, "Alright, ten. Not a second later."

I nodded slightly and pivoted on my heel. I was a little upset though. Shouldn't she have tried to ask me more?

She didn't even ask what I was doing or why we were planning prom already when we didn't even know the theme. Ethan was right, my parents didn't know me.

And I'm still wondering if that's as much of a good thing as he says it is.

I wanted to turn around to deal with that issue but more pressing matters were at hand and the car that pulled up in front of my gate couldn't make that any clearer.

The black mustang was unfamiliar but the boy that stepped out was hardly foreign and that's only because he had on more casual looking clothes.

He spotted me rather quickly and smiled, briskly walking over to where I stood.

"Going somewhere?" Austin questioned with a little smile.

I nodded and looked over to my car, parked right behind moms in the driveway.

"Can I ask where to?"

"I'd rather you not."

He shrugged, "Well, I'm going to ask anyway."

"Ethan's. What brings you to the desperate housewives part of town?"

He smiled, kicking a rock in front of him, "Your dad wanted to have a talk with my dad but he was busy-"

"So you're the next best thing." I finished and by the way he looked at me, I was right.

"You're the smart type aren't you?" he asked, sitting down on the porch step. "Like the Spencer off of that ABC show."

I gawked at him, "You watched Pretty Little Liars?" I questioned in amazement and inched a little closer.

"No," he chuckled, "I saw a commercial for it and saw this girl who looked so much like Piper."

I narrowed my eyes, "That doesn't explain how you know who Spencer Hastings is."

He opened his mouth and folded my arms. He huffed and added a little chuckle, "Okay, I'm guilty of watching one episode but that was it."

"It's pretty good, you should watch it more."

"No thank you, I think I'll stick to ESPN."

That clicked something in my head, "Damn it." I mumbled and scrambled for my keys. I spun on my heels and jogged over to my car.

"What's wrong?" I heard Austin ask from behind.

"I have to get to Ethan's." I answered hastily, opening the door and slamming it close.

I felt a tinge of guilt as I backed out of the driveway and saw Austin standing at the center of the verandah scratching his head, looking awfully confused but I shrugged it off as I drove down the lonely street.

It took me all but thirty minutes to get to Ethan's and enter the unlocked door.

"Josh, what did I tell you about keeping the front door unlocked!?"

The boy in question strutted his way into view, clad in a t-shirt and boxers and hugging a bowl of cereal. "We're not dead so calm down."

"This time," I noted, pulling off my jacket shoulder and putting it on the rack, "Next time it won't be me and someone is going to go Silence of the Lamb on both your asses."

He rolled his eyes and spun around; leading me to the living room that's only form of lighting was the television screen. "Mom or Dad would have locked it once they came home."

"Your mom's a doctor and your dad's a historian. They won't be back until the wee hours of the morning."

He shrugged and fell onto the couch, "So I take it it's the big talk between you and Ethan tonight."

"Yup."

He looked off and eyes me intently, "You don't seem nervous but then again, you're Spencer. You're good at hiding emotions."

I scoffed, "I would take offence to that if it wasn't so mind numbingly true. I still resent it though."

"You ready?"

I chuckled, "This is just a conversation Joshy, it's not like we're having sex or anything."

His eyes narrowed, "Condoms are in the left drawer."

"Oh, shut it."

He smirked, "I wish I could watch it play out."

"Why the hell would you want to watch a train possibly running off the tracks?"

I sat back into the sofa, "Well, Ethan's blunt and you hold back so it should be entertaining watching it."

"Yeah well, I'll film it so you can rent it." I murmured before spinning around and heading up the stairs to Ethan's room.

I stopped just shy of his room and thought for a minute.

This was really happening. This was it. Ethan mush have been scared, he must have been nervous.

I walked in front of his door and opened it quickly.

What happened next was surely the most eye rolling eye roll I have ever done.

Ethan was sitting in front of the television with a controller in his hand, a bowl of potato chips next to him and a pair of headphones on.

He looked over and smiled toothily over at me, "Hey Spencer!"

I jumped at the unnecessary volume. "What the actual fuck, Ethan."

"Say what?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose, "Take off the headphones, you moron."

"I'm not wearing any shirt to take off Spence!"

I closed my eyes and clenched my jaw, walking into the room and slamming the door shut behind me. Ethan jumped this time.

He took off the headphones and let it slide down his neck until they rested onto his shoulders. "You look angry."

Don't punch him. Don't Punch him. "I'm fine."

"Whatever, dude." His eyes trailed back to the television but widened with enthusiasm and marched back over to me, "Bro! I got the new Mortal Kombat! It's siiick."

"Ethan. You called me over here to talk."

He surged, "I know but I thought we could play a little before we have to get all Dr. Phil."

"Tempting but I told my mom that I'd be back at ten and if we start we'll never stop so turn it off and put on some pants."

He looked down at his loosely fitted boxers. So much so that if you leaned at the right angle, you'd see more than you bargained for.

"Why does it matter of I wear clothes or not. We have showered together before, you know."

"Yeah, when we were in six grade when those parts weren't open for business."

"There was that time in tenth grade..."

"That time doesn't count."

He laughed, "It so does. There was legit meeting of the balls."

I couldn't help but crack a little smile, "I was wasted for the first time and you dared me! It doesn't count."

He snickered, "Whatever," I retorted childishly, "I'm still not putting on any pants so you'll have to deal."

I rolled my eyes, "Fine," I huffed and walked over to where he sat and 'popped a squat' next to him.

Ethan put down the controller and turned off the TV but neglected to turn off the game console itself. He readjusted himself so his body was facing mines head on.

He blew out hot air and annoyingly tapped his knees with his pointing fingers, "So, where do we start with this?"

I shrugged and coughed, "I think we should talk about our feelings towards one another first."

He nodded, "Okay."

"Okay."

"I love you."

Blut Ethan. Gatta Love 'em

"Explain what you mean by 'I love you'."

"I mean what I said, I Love you, Spence."

"I know that, Ethan but what kind of love?"

He narrowed his eyes in a confused manner, "There are different kinds of love?"

My eyes mirrored his, "Yes."

"Well, I missed that class."

I exhaled sharply, "You're so mind blowing-ly stupid. I wish you came with manual." I mumbled, cocking my head to the side but keeping my eyes firmly on him.

"I wish you did too."

I straighten out my position, "Why? I'm not confusing as hell."

He scoffed, "No?"

"No." I reaffirmed, folding my arms across my chest.

"Well you're not as easy to understand as you think."

"Oh Puh-lease!" I exclaimed "I'm not that hard to figure out."

He scoffed again, "You're more difficult to solve than the Da Vinci code."

"You cried during that one too."

"One time!"

I held up both my hands, "Okay, we're digressing."

The competitive look on Ethan's face simmered and he returned back to his relaxed state almost as quickly as he riled up, "Where even were we?"

I sighed, "You were saying that you loved me."

That sounded so weird.

"Oh yeah, right." he took a pause to recollect his thoughts, "Well, I love you but I don't know if it's romantic." He looked up at me with this stern realization. "Kiss me."

I backed up a bit, "What?"

"Kiss Me." he repeated.

"W-what?"

He rolled his eyes, "Who are you, Helen Keller? Kiss Me."

"No."

He graoned, "I'm just trying to solve this situation."

"I highly doubt swapping spit will solve anything. It'll just complicate things more."

"Maybe it will but at least well know who's gay and who isn't."

"Forget, E. I'm not putting my lips on you." I retorted, "Only God knows where those lips have been in the past twenty-four hours."

"Sheesh, you'd think that we didn't swap spit in that room Halloween."

"Hey," I growled, "That was different and you know it."

"How so?" he questioned, folding his arms and waiting a response with visible cynicism.

"We weren't thinking. We were scared."

"Blah, Blah, Blah, we still did it."

"So why should we do it again then? I mean, shouldn't we have known if we were gay from then?"

He thought for a second, "Well, maybe we were confused back then and now we're trying to know for sure."

"If i didn't know any better I'd say you're just tryng to kiss me."

He smiled widely. "Whatever the reason, come closer."

I obeyed - albeit reluctantly, but non-the-less obeyed. I shuffled closer until my folded legs were touching the top of his knees.

He cleared his throat and rested his open palms on the top of my legs.

I took it as an invitation and so I rested my hands in his. The second they dropped into his, he closed them like a Venus flytrap. Quick and fast.

"Okay so just pucker up, look into oen anothe's eyes and lean in and just...connect the -"

I leaped forward and connected our lips.

Ethan's body tightened at the sudden attack but quickly fell into the grove.

His arms curled around my waist and pulled me closer into his lap all the while making sure to keep our lips connected. It took me awhile to register that I had initiated the kiss and that I, Spencer Haynes, was being impulsive without the constant egging on of Ethan Littman.

And The Kiss.

What is the cheesiest way to describe it?

Electric?

Tantalizing?

Soft?

Maybe all of the above but its description was the least of the problem.

The problem was that I actually enjoyed it. It was simple and sweet and I liked it.

When we (finally) broke away and things fell silent.

When Ethan's eyes looked to mines for a conclusive response to the kiss, there was only one thing that stood out.

Not that I loved him or even liked him. I was still confused on that but one thing was painfully, obviously clear. Clearer than any day in mid June.

And it was something that I probably, somewhere in the back of my mind always knew.

I was gay.