The clock hits eight when my shift ends and I'm so happy. My feet hurt, my heart hurts, and I'm glad I have four days without this place to figure out what I'm going to do. I haven't got the courage to go to the ICU yet though, I still have Jacob's items and I don't know how I'm going to sneak up there with them so he doesn't notice.

I clock out and grab my bag when the next nurse comes on for her shift. The first thing I do is go to the bathroom and make sure my hair and makeup looks good. I don't want him to think that I've been upset or crying. I want him to think that I'm so much better without him.

I grab his bag and stuff it all into a biohazard bag so people don't think I'm crazy and take it to the elevator. My heart won't quit racing when I step off the elevator into ICU. I find his small office door where we've made out several times and I ignore the memories because I know he was making them with her as well. I open the door and throw his stuff on his desk before pulling the check out and sticking it on top of his desk.

"RJ?" I hear behind me as I freeze and turn. When I do I see Jacob and Beth together. But what stops me is his face. His face looks horrible, and then I remember what Jax told me.

"Oh my god." I whisper looking at his face completely messed up. His eye is busted, his nose is bandaged up and his face looks like he's been close to death.

"I had no idea that's what he went to do Jacob." I immediately tell him as Beth looks at the bag on Jacob's desk.

"It's the rest of your stuff. I put a check on there for five hundred dollars, that should cover everything you helped pay for. I don't want to see you again and I don't need anything from you." I tell him as they both stare at me.

"I'm leaving now." I start as I push past them walking out the door. "RJ?" He stops me as I turn back and look at them together.

"He told me to stay away from you or he'd kill me." He tells me as I sigh and stand quietly. I'm not surprised that Jax told him that and suddenly I like him that much more for having my back the way he does. I just hate how he was and how I don't know anything going through his mind right now.

"As he should." I spit out holding my purse.

"RJ I'm sorry." He tells me while Beth holds his arm.

"You're sorry? Does she know?" I ask him pointing to her as she holds his arm tighter and looks at his face. I know that she doesn't.

"He backhanded me if you can't tell but the spot I've covered with makeup. It's so sore it hurts, but know that when you sleep with him tonight. Just know that when he's pissed he's going to hit you." I tell her as her face pales.

"Have a nice life together." I tell him walking back to the elevator and closing the doors. When I finally reach the garage with my car, I get in and feel relief on my body and incredibly sore feet.

I feel tears in my eyes as I let them fall and laugh at myself for still having feels for Jacob. I just can't erase four years together and I can't erase the moment I knew we ended, the moment he hit me. And I laugh at myself for crying as I wipe my tears and think of Jax.

I know what I'm doing tonight. I don't care if he's with Poppy and I don't care if he doesn't want to see me. I have to see Jax. I have too.

I pull out of the garage and towards his house. It's eight, and he should be home considering he's not fighting right now. I don't know how it's affected him for when he goes back into fighting but I hate the idea of him getting hurt.

When I'm at his gate, it's fixed. So I have to hit the button and after a few seconds it opens and I'm let in. He knows I'm here when I pull to his house with the lights on and park in the driveway.

He opens the door as I'm coming up the steps and I don't stop my pace as I walk up to him and grab his neck in my hands. And in that moment I seal my lips over his and kiss the living hell out of him. I don't let him talk as I wrap my arms around his neck and lift myself onto his waist.

I wrap my legs around his waist and rub the side of his face as I grip his jaw opening his mouth wider for me to kiss him. He immediately responds shutting and locking the door behind me before pushing my back into it and kissing me back.

He rubs his hand through my hair and one supports my ass as he plunges his tongue into my mouth. I rock my hips into his hard length and we don't stop to breathe. He grabs me in his arms and takes me to his master bedroom and I let him.

When he drops me onto his bed I gladly pull him on top of me and keep kissing his lips. I grip his collar on his tee and push it over his head breaking his lips away from mine for a few seconds before I'm back kissing him. I rub his abs in my hands and feel to the front of his sweatpants when I push them off of him.

He slips them off along with his boot as he takes off my scrub top to see my red bra. It took me over a year to have sex with Jacob, but with Jax I don't need time to know I trust him. Because I trust him and I know I love him. I don't know if I'm in love with him but I do love him and I've never wanted something more than what I want right now. He moves his hands to my scrub bottoms and takes them off of me coming to view with my red thongs that match my bra. I mentally pat myself on the back for putting on my favorite pair today, I wanted confidence today and red panties always make me feel better.

I slip my shoes off when he picks me up and pushes me into his sheets closer to his headboard. He opens my thighs and kisses me rubbing his very erect dick over my throbbing heat. When he breaks away from my lips and looks into my eyes I nod over and over again telling him yes. My period ended this morning at work after I cleaned myself up with feminine wipes for at least ten minutes because I hate having a period or smelling any type of way. I know I'm more than ready for whatever we're going to do.

"Take off my bra." I whisper to him as he moves his hands to my back and unbuttons it. I thank him for not ripping it apart when he threatens to after it taking too long to come off. When it's gone he's immediately gets his head down and lips on my breasts. He sucks my nipples into his mouth as he kisses and rubs between them both. I feel myself creaming with the hot wet movements of his tongue and skillful work of his fingers needing my boobs.

"Fuck Jax." I whisper to him as he kisses down my stomach. I move my hands from his shoulders to his head rubbing his hair between my fingers when he reaches for the sides of my panties and completely rips them apart. When I'm naked below him I expect to freeze and feel uncomfortable but I don't. I know I want this.

What I don't expect though is when he starts kissing the inside of my thighs. I moan his name when he starts sucking the sides of them and then I can't control the satisfaction I feel when he licks up my clit. I've never felt something so good before in my life. I've always wanted this, and I'm so glad he's the man giving it to me.

I grip his scalp when he starts moving his tongue through my folds while moving his fingers into me making me scream his name in pleasure. I rock my hips onto his face when he's eating me out like no tomorrow. I feel my breathing increasing, my legs around his head shaking, my hands gripping his scalp, his sheet rubbing my erect nipples, and his hands holding my thighs open as he rubs my ass in his big hands. I can't take how much pleasure I have and I feel it warming in my lower belly and further below.

That's when my orgasm takes over. "Oh my-, Jax" I moan gripping his scalp as he keeps licking and moving his fingers. I can't talk when it runs through my body causing me to take a hand away from his head and bite it so I don't scream. He finishes and kisses his way up my body before taking my lips into his and kissing me.

I greedily kiss him and I reach below us pushing his boxers off. "Do you have condoms?" I ask him as I reach for his length and take it into my hand feeling how big and hard he is. His girth is something I'll never get used to, he's so thick and long that I know he's going to rip me when I'm riding his dick. He never takes his lips off of mine when he opens his nightstand and throws the contents on the floor.

I see a shiny gold packet as I instantly smile onto his mouth. I take it from him and rip it open as I grab him and roll it down his dick. He moves his hips along mine before lining up at my entrance. "Please Jax." I whisper into his ear as he grabs my thighs opening them and pushes so far into me that I see stars.

I can't talk when I roll my eyes back in my head feeling how incredibly full he makes me. I slump back into the sheets bringing him with me as he continues kissing me harder and harder. I rock my hips into him when he pushes harder and harder until he curves his hips and finds my g-spot that's never been touched before.

I moan loudly when my legs shake from him. He grips my thigh in one hand and the headboard in the other as he wrecks me. He pounds into me until I can't move from moaning his name and I know he's close when he's sweating trying to hold back.

"Let go Jax." I whisper into his ear as I feel him release. I know he does when the tension in shoulders lets go and I'm coming that instant when he rubs my clit between his fingers making me moan. I grab his shoulders not letting go as he slips his hands from the headboard to hold himself above me with both arms. I keep my legs around his waist as I feel him swelling inside of me.

But I don't move. I let him, I want to feel him. I rub my hand through his hair kissing his neck as I smile smelling him. He abruptly flips us over while staying inside of me as I sit on his softened dick and kiss all over his chest. I feel his hands wrap around my ass as he lifts me off of him and takes the condom off before reaching over and grabbing a handful. He rips one open and pushes it over himself as I keep kissing his neck. Then I find him hard all over again as I sit down on top of his hardened member.

I grab his neck and rock my hips onto his feeling his hands holding my ass as he kisses my shoulder. "Ry fuck." He finally tells me as I clinch around him over and over again making him feel it. I sink down on him until I'm fucking my g-spot and grip his chest.

"I'm-, cum." I whisper into his ear when he grips my ass and bucks his hips. We meet each other and both orgasm at the same time as spasms hit my pussy, and take over. "God Jax." I whisper with my numb legs as I grip his scalp. We're both panting when I pull back to look into his eyes and smile.

"Let's do it again." He whispers smiling at me as he kisses my lips and we start all over again, all night long.