"Hi mom" I whisper into the phone as I sit down in my car. I packed my bag up ten minutes ago and after breaking down on the elevator I made it to my car and called my mom. She's always been the most supportive person and she's able to help me with everything.

"Hey sweetheart what's going on?" She immediately asks as my phone Bluetooth connects and I hear her on my car system. I pull out of the parking lot and take the navigation towards Florida as I wipe my tears. I don't have to work for a few days and I need to clear my head and think.

"I don't know if Jacob and I are broke up or not and I need to think alone. Do you care if I come and stay for two days?" I ask.

"Of course not! I miss you so much! I'll clean your bedroom sheets and have everything ready for you. Do you want lobster and shrimp for dinner?" She asks as I smile. We live so close to the coast it's easy to go out and get dinner and she loves to do it with my dad.

"Yeah mom. I'll be there after lunch." I tell her. "I love you Rylee Jane, be safe honey. We'll talk when you get here." She tells me as I wipe my tears and smile. That's why I love her so much, she just knows what to say.

"I love you too mom." I mutter out. "Stop crying RJ, everything happens for a reason baby. I love you." She tells me before she hangs up. I look down and see my practically empty tank of gas so I pull into the gas station and quickly fill up my tank before getting back onto the road. The only money I had was from Jax and I just wish I would have stayed with him all day so I didn't just have one of the hardest conversations ever.

While I'm thinking of him, his name pops up on my contacts list and I hit it. It starts ringing as I wipe my tears. "Hey Ry, how'd it go?" He asks immediately.

"Umm not too good but it'll be okay. I just wanted to thank you for the money. I'm going to see my parents for a few days and I really appreciate everything." I tell him.

"Rylee, what's wrong?" He asks me as I watch the road and make my way onto the interstate. I hear my own voice crack when I start, "Jax I'm not enough and it hurts." I admit as I wipe my tears.

"Ry he's a piece of shit and anyone can see that. He was jealous of me because he thought something happened and now he's got you back in his pocket and he's going to continue treating you like shit and not give you what you deserve." He tells me as I nod. I know he's right, and he's honest about it all.

"But I love him. We've been together for four years and I love him." I tell Jax honestly as he sighs.

"And it's going to hurt like hell. It's going to hurt but what's more important to you, feeling like your walking on eggshells to make him happy or doing what you want and finding someone worth your time and effort?" He questions.

"I'm scared that if I don't have him I'll never have anybody. He's the only guy I've ever dated and it's all I've ever known." I tell him.

"Ry I had a girlfriend a few years back and I loved her, I did. But one day the fights started and they never ended. We had to call it quits because we could not get along for more than ten minutes. Maybe it's time to ask yourself if it's worth it." He tells me as I sigh.

"Jax I think I love you as my best friend." I tell him laughing as I hear him laugh as well. "I'm pretty amazing aren't I?" He asks as I agree, "yes, amazing!"

"Ry it'll be okay. I promise you will find someone else if you chose that path. You're beautiful, smart, kind, and you're a full package. Someone is going to want you and treat you like everything you are." He tells me as I smile.

"Thank you Jax. I don't have many people but I'm glad I met you." I tell him back, I can see his smile now.

"Me too. I've got to go, Carter's coming over so we can figure out where to go from here with my foot. I've got to train though or I'm going to lose my mind." He tells me as I smile.

"Be careful. And ice your foot tonight for the swelling and send me a picture of the bandages so I can tell if you need to change them." I tell him.

"Yeah I will, bye Ry. I'll talk to you later." He tells me as I smile. "Bye Jax." I tell him as I hang up. For the next few hours I drive home quietly and I don't cry. I don't shed a tear because I'm not thinking about Jacob, I'm thinking about the six foot six amazingly kind guy I met a day ago. And the guy that I have feelings for.

___

When I pull up to my parents home I see them through the windows preparing dinner. It's two in the afternoon now, and I'm so happy to see them. I grab my bag and keys as I lock my car listen to the beach waves behind our house. I still smell the salt water of it here and it's beautiful. It's just not somewhere to live anymore, you get sick of the beach when you live here and I'm happy in Atlanta, or I used to be.

I open the front door as the alarm chimes and I drop my bag. My parents enter the living room as I smile and launch at them. I give them the biggest hugs possible as they kiss my head and tell me how much they have missed me.

"Y'all have no idea how much I missed you both." I admit as I hug them harder, especially my beautiful mom.

"You too sweetie. Let me take your bags." She tells me as I shake my head no. She's not carrying it at her age, and I'm a big girl.

"I got it. You can help me unpack while dad cooks. Right dad?" I ask as he smiles at me. I have always been his little girl, especially since my older brother passed away from a miscarriage. I never met him, but after that I know my parents were affected and it was reflected on how I was raised. I was always sheltered or at the beach surfing, and when college gave me a chance to try something new I took it.

"I guess so Ry" he tells me using my nickname as he kisses my cheek.

I pull my mom to my old bedroom as I throw my bag up onto my bed and she sits next to me. "Alright start and tell me everything that happened." She immediately asks when I sit next to her. She laughs at my clothing options that I threw together while helping unpack my bag and I'm thankful I still have clothing here when I see how mismatched everything is.

But then I tell her everything. Everything about Jacob and even about Jaxton and Bee. She's of course not too excited when she finds out that I stayed the night in Jaxton's guest bedroom but she listens when I tell her it all.

"And now you don't know what to do?" She asks as I nod. "Can I give you my honest opinion?" She asks as I nod.

"Jacob's a sweet boy and I know you love him Rylee Jane. But being sweet and being a life partner are really two different things. What's going on isn't right and you know that. And we both know that he's a little immature and irresponsible still." She tells me as I nod.

"But this Jaxton seems to be mature and responsible." She tells me as I nod. "Mom he's so sweet and handsome. He's the most beautiful man I've ever seen, from his beautiful body to his eyes, height and charm. He treats me so kindly and we're only friends but I know I have feelings that developed in one day." I tell her truthfully.

"Well, RJ what's the plan?" She asks as I sigh. "I have to stay with Jacob so I have somewhere to stay and live." I tell her as she sighs.

"You have more than enough money saved up to get your own apartment and move out. Give me a better excuse than that." She tells me as I wipe my tears smiling.

"I'm scared. I'm scared that if I make the wrong decisions I'll hurt him and that I'll hurt Jaxton too." I tell her as she kisses my forehead and hugs me.

"Then take some time to think about it while you're here. I'm just excited your home! Dinner?" She asks cheerfully as I nod and she pulls me up taking me to the kitchen with my dad, and dinner's amazing.

___

After dinner I take a blanket out onto the beach with my bare feet and sit in the sand with it wrapped around me. I want to watch the sunset and moon, coming here it's always one of my favorite things to do. I smile at the little crabs in the sand and keep my body still as I feel the wind blowing my hair.

It's so calming, it feels so good.

I feel my phone vibrate as I pull it out of pocket and see a text from Jax. It's a picture of his foot and it looks a lot better.

Looks good kill man. Ice it up and you're good to go! :) I reply back smiling as I text him.

It hurts like a bitch kicked my balls He texts me back as I smile.

Pop some aspirin or Tylenol and you'll be fine big guy, you're supposed to have a high pain tolerance you know with the amount of punching and shit you do? I send him back.

Not when it's my feet ;) how's it going? He asks me as I grin.

Really great. Thanks for funding the much needed trip. I owe you one. I text him.

Then make it up to me by coming over when you get back. Bee's grieving without you. Here's proof. He texts me as I see a picture of Bee laying on Jax's bed with his eye covered making me aww in love with the old guy. Next to come in is a video of him whaling at the top of his lungs meowing as Jax asks him to stop and he won't.

Oh goodness from meeting me one time? I didn't think that would happen! I tell him.

No, it's from giving him cat treats since he knows I won't do it often. He texts me back as I grin.

I'll see about it. Tell him I'm sorry and give him a treat he looks like he's been a good boy. Night Jax :) I type back.

Night Ry, be safe and I might consider it. He texts me as I grin at my phone. I look up into the dusk with the beautiful sunset and see how amazing it is before I get another vibration of my phone from Jacob. But this time it's a phone call. I answer it as I hold it onto my lap.

"Hey RJ, you okay?" He asks as I start, "I'm with my parents, I'm fine. I'll be back in a few days" I tell him.

"Rylee I miss you already and I can't do this arguing like this." He tells me as I lean onto my knees. He's right, we never argue and this is hard to do. "Then really tell me what's going on because you know how I feel." I tell him.

"I've been-, I don't know how to, I just. I've made mistakes and I love you RJ I do but these mistakes make me rethink a lot." He tells me. Rethink what? What mistakes?

"What mistakes?" I ask listening to the ocean. "Umm, Just you know what happened." He tells me as he refers to the situation from years ago.

"But I forgave you for it. I don't hold it over your head." I tell him. "I know but I do." He tells me calmly.

"Listen Jac let's just think for a few days and see what happens. I want a life with you and I think you need to make that choice for yourself in the next few days and ask if you want that with me. If the answers no then break my heart now and let it be done so I can find someone who wants what I do. If it's yes, pay off those loans and we'll work through our problems and get engaged. But I need an answer when I get back." I tell him as he sighs.

"Okay then, I'll make one. I love you RJ." He tells me as I smile.

"I love you too Jac." I tell him before hanging up and looking back at Bee in my text from Jax. I cut it off a few seconds later as I see the sky blue and the moon out shining so bright and beautiful.

It's perfect, the only aspect of my life not in complete confusion is the beautiful moon.