It had been three days since I had moved from the Ravenden estate. I could tell that my family was worried and had a lot of questions but they still respected my privacy and left me alone. I had spent these three days in my room. I had told Itri that it would be best for him to stay in the Ravenden estate, he had already started to get used to it and I didn't know if that could happen again here. I had asked for Anna to take care of him, to always be patient and gentle with him. I would still visit him, I didn't want to just abandon him, I'd promised.

But I didn't know if I'd have the strength to visit the Ravenden estate like that. I needed more time to sort out my feelings.

'I had always been like this.'

'Weak and scared.'

'Could never do anything right and would always mess things up.'

'Always running and running. I really am pathetic.'

I'd always go to the garden when I felt sad but I couldn't do that anymore.

I stood up and grabbed a jacket.

I went down the stairs and went to the entrance.

"Where are you going?" My brother, Soris, called out.

"My room feels suffocating, I need some fresh air."

I opened the door and went out, I wasn't really thinking of where I would go and just let my body move on it's own. When I snapped out of my trance I realized that I had gone to the park, that beautiful park Elliot had showed me. I should've left but didn't. I just walked around, touching some of the flowers and rivers. It helped calm my nerves.

"Aren't you lady Vladenburg?" A soft voice spoke.

I turned to see who it was that had called out to me only to see Emma.

"Oh it is you! I saw you at the ball, well it was only for a moment."

"Oh."

"Hey are you okay? You seemed kind of out of it during the ball."

"... Yes. I'm alright."

Emma satt down and patted the space next to her, insinuating that I should sit next to her.

"Are you busy?" She asked.

"No I've only been staying in my room for a while now." I said with an awkward chuckle.

I turned to look at her, she really was adorable, she had a certain charm to her, fitting of a female lead. While I..

Even though Emma was speaking right next to me, I couldn't a single word she said. My mind went back to when I fell into the river and Elliot saved me. That day, I realized just how much life meant to me. I was struggling to figure out why but now I know.

Elliot.

When I was with him I truly felt alive, he gave me the warmth I had always craved and I threw it away.

'I've become too greedy.'

I knew he was meant to be with her yet I still wanted him for myself.

'I'm too selfish, I'm acting like a fool.'

If it's for him then I'd gladly make a fool out of myself, I wouldn't regret it.

"You aren't listening are you?" Emma said with a chuckle.

"Huh? What, oh wait, I'm sorry." I said with a weak smile.

"It's alright." She said with a smile.

I looked at her once more. "What do you think of people that are selfish with love? Aren't they horrible?" I practically whispered.

"Hmm, well isn't love inherently selfish? When you love someone you want them all for yourself, and if you get with them then you steal that chance from someone else."

"Right.."

"But what about that is horrible?" She asked as she looked at me with curious eyes. I felt trapped in them.

"Humans are selfish, there's nothing wrong with prioritizing your own happiness. If you live solely to always give and never take for yourself then what will you have by the end?"

I looked at her completely stunned, I had forgotten something so simple.

'It's alright for me to love.'

I stoop up and looked down at her.

"I'm sorry Emma."

"For what?"

"For being selfish."

She laughed as she looked at me and lifted her hands to wave me goodbye.

"We should hang out sometime." She said with a smile and I nodded, returning a smile to her and then ran off.

.

.

.

.

'Y'know, when I saw Elliot I could tell he was my fated partner. He stood out from everyone else in the ball, but when I saw your face under the moonlight, I realized.'

'The love I felt for him was nowhere near the feelings you had.'