After what my nonna had said over the phone i'd got home and took out the paper in the drawer, and then I added his number into my contacts.

I then proceed to throw away the paper and fell asleep sometime after putting my phone to charge.

I wasn't a good person, but I don't think I was necessarily a bad one either.

I wouldn't call myself misunderstood because that was something along the lines of making excuses for who I was but there was no reason to do that.

One word wasn't able to describe how I acted.

I was rude, brief, bitchy, cold, distant but in the end I was still a human, I still had feelings, and I could still be capable of feeling bad.

And I did. The longer I drove home, the more bad I felt.

It was the end of the college day.

I'd successfully avoided going to my last class again and with a lot of thought i'd went to the coffee shop Karsen took me not too long ago instead.

I'd thought he'd be here after the class ended, or well I hoped he would be, and when he wasn't i'd felt like telling myself this was fate telling me that I shouldn't try.

But truth was, I never really ever believed in fate.

So I took my phone out, sending a mental fuck you out to fate and texted Karsen, asking him to meet me at the coffee shop if he had time and I knew he was nice, so he'd probably make time even if he was busy anyway.

Then before I put my phone away i'd rolled my eyes at the brief message i'd texted with my name. I shot him another text, all that text saying was a simple, please.

Now i'd walked into the coffee shop, looking around the inside, noticing that there was barely anyone in here and of course there wasn't because it was a Monday at exactly 2pm.

I walked over to the counter and ordered the coffee he liked.

Black coffee with three sugars. Heinous

And I also got myself a cookie and water because even if I was horrible for everything else, I deserved a cookie for at least trying with Karsen.

That reminds me. I checked my phone, but no reply, and suddenly it felt like the world was crashing but it had only been a few minutes and I was definitely just being dramatic.

After sometime of scanning the menu in boredom I walked over to the seat i'd sat down with him a week before, playing with my phone in hand just for the very same waitress that day to give me my stuff.

She didn't stay to say hi or even so much as look at me to recognize me. She set my stuff down, meaning the coffee in a to go cup, as well as a blue velvet cookie with white chocolate chips for Karsen and a red velvet cookie with brown chocolates chips and water bottle for me.

I didn't know if he even liked cookies, but the colors of it reminded me of him for some reason and so I got it.

After she set it down she'd left.

It was now around an hour after I got here, an hour of sitting in coffee shop and at the time around three it began to fill up and I didn't like being alone in here with so many people gathered together.

So I left.

Well, I didn't really leave. I just decided to sit outside for a little, waiting for the coffee rush hour to come to an end with the coffee cup still in hand and the cookie in its closed packet in hand as well.

I was swirling the thing as I looked down at the black lid, tracing the indents at the top.

Black coffee with three sugars.

Bitter and sweet.

How strange.

There were cars coming and going so I didn't really take notice of anything or anyone in my surrounds.

That is until someone cleared their throat in front of me, a sound I hadn't heard here before which made me look up in confusion.

I relaxed a little, realizing, he was finally here.

Of course he was.

I bit at the inside of my cheek as I got up from where i'd been sitting coffee and cookie packet still in hand and I cleared my throat of the dryness that began to grow.

I walked a little closer, just a little, before I open my mouth.

"Im sorry." I blurt, not wanting to beat around the bush and ask him how his day was or where he was or to even make small talk beforehand because I needed to tell him that I was sorry first.

"Im not friendly, I barely talk, and I struggle with working with people and I really do prefer being alone."

He stared at me, looking to the coffee cup and then the packet in my hand, and then lastly back up and over to my eyes, as if he was searching for something but still couldn't find it.

"But Im sorry, Im genuinely sorry for being a bitch to you, especially since you've only been nice to me since the very first day we spoke."

He was still staring at me when I was done with that little rant, and he was still searching, looking at me like he was trying to piece a puzzle but I was far too broken of a puzzle to piece together.

"And heres a coffee thats probably cold but this is already a lot coming from me and I didn't think about how long you'd take and I also got you a cookie but if you don't like cookies its fine, it kinda remind me of the blue and white color scheme going on with you, but if you don't like it dont eat it, mine was pretty good actually so you know, if you like it do eat it, or give it to me, anything is okay."

His lips up twitched at the ends.

"Im pretty sure it all still tastes good though, well as good as black coffee and cookies can be because that shitty black coffee stuff fucking sucks but if you like it then thats understandable, its your preferences and I don't judge people on their coffee preferences."

He was smiling at me right now.

I swallowed, wondering why the hell he was looking at me like- that.

"What?" It was like a croak because i'd been ranting and my throat was awfully dry now.

"That's the most i've heard you talk, like, ever." He replies, walking closer to me and taking the coffee cup from my hands, drinking some of it and he smiled as he looked to the cookie, then to the coffee cup in hand.

"Black, three sugars." He looks to me, "You remembered."

I nodded, "I remembered."

He's still smiling at me, and it makes me a little nervous, my face growing warm and I think I might be a little flustered, maybe embarrassed too. Im not used to doing nice stuff for people and seeing just how grateful they can be for it, even for the small stuff.

Fuck. He's still staring at me.

"Its just black coffee and three sugars Krist, you're a pretty simple man."

He was still smiling at me and I think I was staring at him like I was petrified. He was handsome, unearthly beautiful but I had no idea why he was looking at me like that and it made me nervous.

It was just a cookie and coffee!

"You're talking a lot more to me."

"Do you want me to stop?" I asked, the words more like a threat on my tongue than a question.

"Please don't." He said, but I had no idea if he was joking around or being serious.

I didn't reply, I only turned around and assumed he was following me as we walked into the coffee shop, my arms crossed over my chest as we made our way over to the booth.

I slid in front and he slid on the other side, his hair damp again and I rose a brow at it.

"Were you showering?"

He nodded as he opened the cookie, "Football practice is the whole week, except some Fridays."

I blinked. The whole week, except some Friday?

"You're basically drafted." I deadpanned as I looked to my bag beside me, taking my water out my bag and he snorted.

"Only after class?"

He nodded, "Two till five, Mondays is two till four though, Friday is our own choice if we wanna practice or not most weeks."

I hummed at that, biting at my cheek.

"I work till five everyday too, so." I added, letting him know his football times weren't inconvenient to me since I finished at the exact time as he did.

He nodded in understanding. "We can work three times a week, after five, on weekends if we need too."

"You have this planned out."

His lips twitched, "I have an investigation board in my bedroom, had it mapped out and everything."

Is he joking?

"Like a detective board?"

He nodded.

"So did you get it on Amazon or did you go hunting for police boards?"

He smiled but didn't reply and I felt my eyes roll as I smirked at his behavior. He was odd. Charming. Also odd. I guess he was oddly charming.

"Of course."

"Im kidding, I don't own a police board."

"White board?" I asked curiously as I cocked my head to the side and when his dimple indented as he bit at the side of his cheek I knew i'd got him.

Then i'd realized it.

He'd said he liked to draw with markers.

White board.

Markers.

Huh. I now get the connection of the two.

Cute.

"So do you have any ideas?" He asked me when i'd gotten quiet, as if he was scared i'd crept back into my shell but he didn't have to worry, I was okay, at least today.

I look to my bag beside me before I shoved my open note book over to him, watching as he eyed everything, everything which was more than just one idea, "We should do multiple sculptures and put them together, no one desires one thing, if you do desire you desire many or nothing at all."

He looks at me and I can see his skepticism. His eyes say thats not true, but it is. He's just not seeing it the way I see it.

"You're not getting it."

"Maybe." He says and I almost smile but I restrain it.

"I'm saying for example, you can desire one person, I know, but when you want one person, don't you want all of them, like, every part of them, not just one?"

His eyes clear a little like his beginning to understand but he needs more to pull him into the idea.

"One person is made up of many things, if you desire them you yearn for everything that comes with them, similar to how you yearn for a kiss but you want to kiss them everywhere, thats why people kiss a persons mouth, neck, jaw, but its all on that one person, the same way this is one sculpture just that its put together with many parts, you get it?"

He nodded in understanding. Finally getting what I was putting out.

"Good idea, but whats the first one?"

"When you think desire you think?" I ask slowly.

He blinks, "Sex?"

I almost groan. "Okay thats on me, you're a hormonal man."

He snorted. I smirked.

"Its lips." I tell him.

He clicked his tongue at the roof of his mouth before he nods, "Yeah, that sounds easier to sculpt than sex."

I nodded, "Much easier."

"What do you want to use?"

"Clay and resin."

He hummed, "We have a five months and two weeks for all of this, you know?"

I nodded, "Im sorry about that."

He shook his head, "Its fine."

Im happy he didn't ask me why I was so reluctant though.

After sometimes of planning and rough sketching we left the coffee shop side by side, the sun already having set and for once I feel a little lighter.

"You should talk more, you have good ideas." He says as we get to the parking lot, him beside me and I looked to him, wanting to smile but I didn't.

I just nodded, looking over to my car.

"See you tomorrow, Karsen."