The smell of smoke, filled my nostrils as I snapped out from the reality of sleep, I woke up to the eyes that I waited for all through the night, he confidently sat in the chair across from me admiring my body form. He seemed to have stayed awake all night, but he didn't show it. He looked pissed and still almost, but his eyes moved with mine as they trailed along with his clothes he wore last night. I adjusted my arm as my eyes went back to the cancer stick in his very own hand, I knew he was stressed, I could see how uneasy he was, by his harsh look that followed my every move.

I adjusted my eyes as they began to adapt to the shining light from the open windows. I moved my legs to the edge of the couch and adjusted myself as I stretched my back, his eyes followed mine.

"I made strawberries", I said as I got up and headed to the fridge to grab them hoping it would cheer him up.

"Have one, they're even fun to watch someone eat, see", I took the strawberry as his eyes followed my hand moving to my open mouth. He stood up, as I bit into the chocolate-dipped strawberry and he moved closer, I ate the strawberry soundly as he took the stem and the platter away from me and pushed me down on the couch, he breathed heavily on top of me.

His hand caressed my cheek softly, as his body pressed against mine in the worst way possible, he was simply crushing me, did I mind it, though? Never.

He dove into my lips that needed his forever. He was aggressively kissing me and I knew this wasn't the way he wanted this to go, he wanted it to be romantic and loving not aggressive and angry. He kept kissing me, even though he knew I wasn't in it. He moved down to my neck as I pulled his face down to mine and, I looked into those intense eyes, that had told me I was his whole world.

"Why are you mad?", I asked him as he dove for my chest and rested his head on mine as I teased his hair gently, he clutched me tightly, like never before.

"It's fine, and I'm sorry for not finishing until a couple of hours later", I could tell something was still bothering him, but I knew what kind of man he was and if he said he didn't want to talk about it then, it was best to not ask.

"It's okay", I ruffled through his hair as I felt his lips under my exposed t-shirt and as he began to kiss my neck, I wanted to hide immediately. I had faded scars

running down my chest and my back, from years ago and he hadn't seen any of them before, I had made sure of it.

"I love you, you know that right", he said as he faced me and I continued to play with his scuffed up hair, he seemed calm as he laid on me.

"I can help you, you know that right", I told him as he nodded and laid there silently as I went back to sleep.

"Natalie babe", he cooed as he played with my hair softly, I turned around to find him fast asleep as he snuggled into my figure and he kept his head dug into my neck, I tried to sneak away as I check the time and it dawned 9 in the morning.

His hands held me close as I kissed his soft lips and he began moaning aloud, I didn't want to hear the rest of this dream, I closed my eyes and covered my ears, knowing that another girls name was going to come out of his lips, but all that came out was "Nat", which I hoped to god was me.

I slipped out of his hands as I ran him a bath and picked him a newly pressed suit, I climbed back into bed feeling the warm arms crowd me again.

"Nolan, you have work", I kissed his cheek as he woke up and smiled at me as he brought me back into bed, he rolled over me, so that I was on top and he held on.

"You're my work, today", he spoke sleepily as I heard him mumble the words that came out of his mouth I kissed him again and he finally woke up, with a bright smile on his face.

"I dreamed of you, you were doing some freaky things", he said as I could tell he still had the picture in his mind and I knew it would cloud his head all through the day. He kissed my lips softly.

He got out of bed, fearing what was coming next and I wanted to ask him if he wanted me to come in today and I knew if he wanted to tell me he would, but he wouldn't want me there.

"You are going to my mom's house today she's planning her anniversary party and she needs your help, we're having dinner there so you can stay", he already had the whole day planned without me and it was nice but it seemed like he wanted to get rid of me, the quicker the better.

"I can come in today, I bet you could use my help with whatever you were working on so late", I asked as his face went cold and I could tell whatever he was dealing with was something he didn't want to share with me.

"No, it's fine, we dealt with it last night, and I just have meeting after meeting, it wouldn't be fun, but maybe drop in for lunch I'll text you", he said as he shuffled to slip his pants on over his briefs and he kissed my head as he did his tie on his own, something I wish I could have done for him.

"We have to go now", he said exhaustedly and I got up quickly and got ready taking a bag with me, he was mad and I needed to know why. He took my hand and gave me no coffee. We went down to the garage without a word spoken and there it seemed as if all the black cars had appeared out of nowhere. All eyes on Nolan and I as they quickly diverted back to the millions of tablets and cells that went buzzing like crazy, Mr. Johnson showed us to the car, while the other men in black suits followed the same.

"Who are they", I asked him as he zoomed out from space and I brought him back to reality as he watched the guards pile into the cars.

"Just security", he simplified it, not specifying why.He held my hand tighter than ever before almost like he was afraid to let me go.

"You didn't have that much security earlier", I commented as he got agitated and I knew I just needed to keep my mouth shut, he hesitated to say something, but I wouldn't necessarily listen to him as he seemed afraid for me.

"Well now they're 2 of us aren't they, and at the rate we're going with sex there will never be a third", he had thrown sarcasm in the mix of his douchebag personalities and I wasn't a fan of it.

"Listen I know you had a bad day, but just please what is going on?", I begged of him as he looked cold to the touch, silent controlling all things that I loved about him made it seem as though he just used it to make him colder to the touch.

"It's just work stuff", he snuggled back into me and I felt his warmness appear next to me and I hugged him as he fell asleep in my arms, boys need love too, even when they feel weak and tired having someone to be there for you can make you feel enlightened.

"I love you", I kissed his head as he slept soundly and we began on the road to his mom's house and I had only this time to make his day better. I slipped his phone out of his pocket and texted Alison, to see if she could make him some coffee and breakfast and she said yes, hoping it would wake him up.

His mind was somewhere else this morning and I needed him to be open with me to make this work, and I couldn't if he wasn't honest.

We arrived at his childhood home, he slept soundly as a baby as I kissed his forehead. He woke up suddenly as he pulled me back on him, he intensely stared into me as he kissed my lips and explored my mouth.

"If anything were to happen to you, I don't know what I would do", he caressed my cheek as I dug into his chest and nodded against me, I climbed off him and made my way out of the car as he followed holding my hand tightly and keeping me close.

As I glanced at the house's lawn I felt as if I was having deja vu, as I saw the black cars tunnel in behind us as they roamed the house, men in suits from every corner checking the area. Nolan looked calm after seeing them, but he didn't see it as odd.

"Nolan is this really necessary", Alison came out behind the door, with a coffee in hand and a pastry in hand as she was agitated the least as Nolan's eyes focused on me and he looked back at his mom.

"Yes, please just go through with it, it's for your safety", he assured us. Alison looked as if she hadn't slept in a while either. I had come here to help with her party, but there must be another reason that I couldn't have just stayed home.

"Fine, but the man said Leah couldn't play outside, she's very upset", she said as she handed him the coffee and I just stood there confused. I went along with it wasn't my place to ask where my husband was going, why we were all on lockdown and it wasn't my job to snoop, it had made me feel alone. He couldn't confide in me his own wife, but he would tell all these men in black.

Nolan hugged me as he kissed my lips like he didn't want to let go and I kissed him back as he held on tighter, he hopped back into his car, and Alison and I made our way to the house.

"Wait", Nolan shouted from behind, and I turned around to see Nolan running towards me and he hugged me softly, and kissed my forehead.

"Please be safe", he whispered as everyone watched for one moment and continued their search of the house.

"I will but just tell me what this is all about", I asked as he laughed a bit and the guards along with Alison pranced inside the house, leaving us alone at the entrance of the house.

"Something big is happening, and all you've told me is please be safe, we're married, I have the right to know, what is happening", I shouted as I ran my fingers through my hair overly stressed as saw his stunned look, and I knew he was done by far.

"God, why are you so needy, you don't have to know everything, so what it's work, you don't work for me anymore", he shouted as it ran me back to my dad yelling at me for crying about my mother, his words shook me alive.

"I'm sorry", I didn't look back as I ran into the house as I heard my name being called in the distance.

I opened the door as my name stopped being yelled and a car door slammed shut, my eyes spilled out tears as I ran to the bathroom. I just wanted my mom.

After an hour in the bathroom, I walked out as I knew everyone knew what had happened by the puffiness of my eyes.

"I'm Claire, your head of security for the household, I will always be here, essentially, but if you'd like alone time then just let the men search the room before.", she was the striking image of a professional, she seemed detached almost as she spoke into her mouthpiece. That was the woman I wish Nolan could see me as, instead of a simple girl who needs protection.

"Okay, well we will just be in the kitchen, then", Alison spoke calmly as I could tell that she was not only bothered by all this commotion but wished it wasn't there. The men left the room and so did Claire as she walked without tripping from her heels, now that's a talent I need.

"I hate making cakes, makes me want to eat them ", Alison let down her hair as she ran her fingers through her brown locks and I feared what had truly happened.

"You want to talk about it", She asked me as she began telling me funny jokes and I finally felt relieved, about where I was in life.

"My son will come around I promise, and he's also a jerk, for getting all this security, for god knows what reason", she comforted me as she hugged me with her flour-coated hands and kissed my head lovingly.

"You look just as confused as I am", she said studying my face and I stood there speechless, as I wanted to know, but I get as though I should respect his decision to not tell me.

"I bet Nolan has a good reason for not telling me about it, about everything", she gasped as she heard the words come out of my mouth, she was right I was more confused he left in the middle of our date, he's been acting shady and I just wish he was honest with me.

"I'm sorry sweetie, he just wants to protect you", she assured me as I knew she was right, but I was tired of being protected and kept, I hated the feeling of not having the freedom, but being married to him wasn't something that I gained in this marriage it was something I had lost.

"I'm just tired of him protecting me, I can take care of myself", I explained as Alison seemed as if she understood my protective dilemma and was tired of it.

"Nolan, will never not protect you, to him it's his job and he loves doing it, it means he loves you and that's just his messed up way of showing it", her explanation made sense to me, but I wasn't a temporary thing, I wanted to be with him all day and he made it so hard when he didn't, share with me every side.

"Okay, when Nolan told me I would be getting security, I didn't expect I'd get a whole army", Avery walked in gracefully, in a black dress. She smiled as she saw me and rushed over dropping her bags down and came rushing to give me a hug.

"Please talk to Nolan, I swear they don't even let me go to the bathroom alone, Cole was getting jealous, especially of that one", she pointed out a fit man, who had his eyes fixed on her, but in the professional way of watching.

"I bet she would love to put us out of our misery, but she doesn't know why", Alison cut in as Avery hugged her and, as Avery registered the words that came out of her mother's mouth, she looked at me in horror.

"My brother has mysterious ways all over him, but tell me he didn't leave in the middle of your date", she pleaded as she hung her coat and her security left the building.

"He left after, hey it's better than leaving in the middle", I told her as she seemed angry, I hoped she hadn't hoped tonight was the special night.

"It's okay, it's okay, so we came here for you, mom so how can we help", Avery turned the attention to a stressed-out Alison. She ran her fingers through her hair as she stress baked, nervously.

"Well, I haven't been having sex", she said as Avery covered her ears, hearing about her moms' sex life, was probably something she didn't want to hear about it.

"I'll just tell Natalie, then", Avery sang over our conversations making sure not to hear about much of anything, until she realized that should she really be telling me.

"She can't help you, she isn't getting any either", Avery interrupted as I chucked a pillow at her and she laughed. It was true, I had no advice as I was still waiting for my so called "special time" to arrive, which was taking weeks and months.

"Fine, I won't use names", Alison suggested as Avery began laughing as if she wouldn't know she was talking about the same man who was her father, half of her DNA.

"Like I won't know it's dad, why don't we not talk about sex", Avery suggested as I agreed and Alison just had to go along with it as helped her frustratedly whip the batter of the cake.

"Okay, we need flowers, catering, decorations, and servers and I just need you two girls to take Leah and pick out the flowers, get blue hydrangeas, mixed with white, that's what I had on my wedding day, I need a bride bouquet, bridesmaids bouquets, then a small arrangement for 34 tables, and Leah needs flowers to put down the aisle, and just some blue or white flowers to freshen up the place, got it?", she said suddenly as she put the cake in the oven and pulled out as many scrapbooks as she could.

"Mom, you have gone crazy, I thought we weren't supposed to go anywhere", Avery argued as I knew Nolan would be mad that I left the house, but I needed to show him that I owned myself, he couldn't tell me what to do, I was me, and I was unstoppable.

"Oh relax, half of them will probably go with you, and whatever this is, it's just Nolan being suspicious, I need to work in a free house, otherwise I'll never get any of this done, and I have another party to plan, and a wedding after that along with my own", Alison sighed as she plumped down on the couch untying her apron and setting it beside her as she went through her schedule. Alison was a very famous party planner to a wedding planner, she was very organized, and I aspired to be like her, I didn't know how she did it all.

"Okay, we will be out of your hair, and where is Leah, exactly", Avery looked around the house and heard not a single peep, from the miss chatterbox, who hadn't been talking all this time.

"She's upstairs with her new teacher and all, really sweet girl, anyways go grab her and you can leave", Avery ventured up the stairs as she lead me to Leah's room which I hadn't been in, but a little girl had begged me to come inside, many moons ago.

"Sissies", Leah got up and hugged both of us as she kissed our cheeks softly and the teacher smiled at us as she got up and introduced herself.

"Hi, I'm Mitchell, Mitchell Rhys, Leah's teacher", she shook both of our hands and left as we told Leah we were taking off and she was coming with us. She put her shoes on and we attempted to sneak out without the guards catching us.

"Mrs. Where are you going", Claire caught us as she tapped her little microphone and said some mumbo jumbo through her headset and I knew she would tell Nolan.

"We are going to look at flowers", I said proudly and they escorted us into a car as half the army trolloped behind us. Leah through the ride as Avery was scrolling through her phone on instagram.

We finally arrived at a small and quaint flower shop, with wonders of colors displayed in the front. I gently woke Leah up as even she marveled at the view, we got out of the car trying to blend in just as normal, but it was hard too, when every moment there were men and women in black following us.

We traveled into the store, weaving through the flower pots to the front of the store, and there was an old lady sitting at the table.

"Hi, how can I help you ladies", she asks us as she looks behind us as the guards back off a bit and wander around the story keeping every angle on us.

"We would like to place an order for a wedding, it's quite large", Avery said as the women studied Avery and Leah.

"Name?",the women said as she grabbed an order form and began filling it out.

"Alison Clementé", the lady beamed as she heard Avery say the women who saved her store.

"Mrs. Clementé, you must be her daughters, you must be blessed to have her she is a wonderful women, I thought Mrs. Clementé was already married?", she asked shyly, but confidently as she declared her love and respect for Mrs. Clementé.

"Well we are her daughters this is my brother's wife, her anniversary is coming up and she's having her vows renewed, she's a bit behind so she asked if we could get this done", Avery said as she signaled out me and the women studied me as she wrote down the list of the orders she needed.

"Mr. Clementé is crazy about you, I remember he came to pick out the flowers and he didn't know you but he wanted something beautiful he told me that the day", she said as it reminded me of how much I missed him and how he just needed to now he had my support, I just wish I knew.

"He never told me about that", I gleamed as I wondered how he was already crazy about me, when I hadn't even heard of him, it all sounds so crazy that if I hadn't agreed to this I wouldn't have met the man I call forever now.

"I'm glad you two have made it in the world, so many couples lose love but you two I have a feeling", she raved on as I smiled shyly as she wrote down the rest of the order.