"You're always the first thought in my mind. When I get a text, or when somebody says my name in the hallway. But, deep down, I think I know it's never actually you. I'm never going to be the one that's swept off their feet by you , never going to have the privilege to be loved by you. I'll never be that important to you. I'm just the one in the background, the one you go to when your first choice doesn't want you anymore.

- excerpt from a book I will never write #688

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The little boy blinks his eyes open in confusion as he hears screams. A woman's screams to be exact.

In a panic he throws the blankets off of him like they are diseased and rushes to his door, he opens the door as silently as he can and follows the noises.

He stops at his fathers office. He furrows his eyebrows in confusion and places his hand on the doorknob, he twists it and the door opens. The sound that a door makes in horror movies is the exact same sound that his fathers office door makes.

The screams stop and he hears groans of pain, he looks into the office and gasps quietly as he sees his mother curled in a ball on the carpeted floor and his father standing over her with a brown whip that is usually used for cattle.

"Father, what are you doing?" He rushes to his mothers side, she shakes her head weakly.

"Go my child," she whispers. "Run Tyler. Run."

"But ma, I can't leave you here," moisture forms in his eyes, but he tries to be strong for his mother.

"Tyler, please. I don't want you to get hurt too!" She exclaims.

But she's too late, hands grip Tyler's neck and he gurgles on his own spit.

The boys own hands come up to his fathers to try and remove them and to at least get the hold to loosen the slightest.

"LET GO OF HIM HENRY!" Edna shouts, trying to stand but failing. Every time she just drops to the floor again, even the slightest movements hurt her freshly made deep wounds.

"It is your fault that he was born on this earth!"

"YOU HELPED!" She shouts, tears streaming down her face watching her little Tyler flail around for air.

"Fa...father," he somehow wheezes out.

His fathers grip tightens around his neck, Tyler brings his foot back quickly and kicks him.

Henry drops little Tyler and bends over in pain, Tyler rushes to his mother and helps her stand.

"I-I wish I could carry you," his lips wobble.

His mother leans on him for support as he rushes her out of the house and into their hiding spot.

It was only the night before his birthday, he couldn't wait but now he's dreading it. He will be 8.

His mother cups his cheek once they are safe and whispers, "you are too young to deal with this Tyler. I wish I could only protect you, b-but I can't and I have failed as a mother," she cries.

||

"Reece is coming over," I mutter shoving my food into my mouth.

Macaroni and cheese.

"So?" Sam asks, wondering what the big deal is.

"He reminds me so much of.... of...."

"Of your mum?" Sam whispers, I nod.

"She was never there when I needed her the most," I whisper. "And Reece is only a reminder of the pain."

"The pain?" Sam questions, I nod.

"I didn't understand much when she left, I was only a young child but I felt so so alone. Alone and abandoned. I thought that I was the one that had done something wrong, my father didn't talk to me. And for weeks, months, years, I blamed myself but I didn't do it. I understand that maybe her and dad were having a few issues, but she left with out saying goodbye."

I look down when I feel tears forming in my eyes, I am the strong one.

"Look to make it easier on you I will invite Tyler, Marcus, Amy, Eddie and Edvard. We can all go either shopping, bowling, go to the movies. But you can of course spend time with him alone?" She shrugs supporting both ideas, I bite my lip.

"No, no, no. That's a great idea, yeah can you invite them? I'm going to get ready," I whisper walking to my room, I hear her sigh heavily.

I walk in my room and sit down on my bed putting my head in between my hands, my vision blurs as the tears form.

Thinking about the past does this to you.

The funny thing is that we think some people are perfect when no one is. We all have a past. Sometimes, you can't escape from it.

We all have our own story. No one can decide the choices that we make or the life that we live, only we as ourselves can.

Sighing, I stand up and walk to my closet. I get out a plain black shirt and some light blue denim shorts, I walk out of my closet and take off the clothes I'm wearing now until I'm in my underwear.

I slide the denim shorts on my legs until it rests on my hips, just as I'm about to put on my shirt I hear a gasp, I curse myself for not closing the door and in surprise I squeal and cover the shirt over my body.

"Edvard," I awkwardly say. He scratches the back of his neck in embarrassment, the tips of his ears are red and his cheeks are red.

"Um, Shae..... I'm so dead," he mutters turning away and walking the direction he came, I close the door and throw my shirt on.

Luckily I was wearing a bra!

Since I already have socks on I just slide on my adidas super stars and open the door again, I bite my lip harshly and walk out.

I can see Ed standing in the corner in embarrassment, I look away awkwardly.

"What's going on?" Amy asks, she walks over to Edvard and presses a kiss to his cheek. My eyes widen in surprise, since when are they dating? They never show PDA (Public display of affection)

"Yeah, are you okay?" Tyler mutters placing a kiss on the corner of my mouth.

"Um.... Edvard saw me getting changed... Accidentally," I quickly add in.

"WHAT!?" Amy and Tyler shout at the same time.

"Oh my god, where's my phone I gotta record this. This is gonna be good," I hear stupid Marcus say.

"Uh oh," Sam and Eduardo both say.

"It was an accident!" Edvard defends.

"Yeah. Plus, I left my door open," I bite my lip, Tyler growls lowly.

"You should always close the door before you get changed," I roll my eyes.

"I didn't except you guys to show up like 30 seconds after Samantha called one of you! So I thought I'd be quick and change, but obviously I wasn't quick enough," I sigh.

"Yeah, obviously," Tyler says.

"And you!" Amy pokes a finger at Ed'd chest. "You wouldn't of known..." she trails off thinking wisely that it was indeed my fault because I left my door open, I was the one who should've closed it.

"Yeah, let's blame Shae," Edvard nods to himself obviously having experienced Amy's wrath.

"Both of you!" I point a finger at Amy and Ed, "since when are you dating?"

They look in between the two and burst out laughing, "c'mon Shae, even Samantha knew. How did you not know!?" They laugh.

"Um, maybe because you never mentioned it, you never ever kiss-" they both turn to each other and kiss on the lips, interrupting my speech. "That is not a 'you can kiss now' word, yet moment! Anyway, you never show any affection so I win!"

"Whatever. When's your little brother going to be here?" Amy asks, just in that moment a knock on the door silences everyone.

Literally, you could hear crickets.

I take a deep breath and put on a smile, I walk to the front door and open it. Reece smiles when he sees me, "Shae!" He exclaims and surprises me by wrapping his arms around my in a hug.

For a moment I leave my arms hanging. But, I slowly bring them up to wrap my arms around his waist.

We pull back seconds later and I smile, "we are going shopping," I decide.

"Okay, just us?" He asks.

I shake my head and take a step back, he steps inside and he looks at all my friends and boyfriend.

"Wow, all of them- hello hottie," he flirtatiously winks at Amy, Edvard wraps an arm around her waist and glares at him growling lowly.

"She's taken bud," I pat him on the back, he turns to Sam and winks at her.

It looks like he's having an eye seizure.

"Well hello there," Marcus scowls.

"Dude, stop. This is my girl. Stop trying to pick up random girls, you obviously got your bad flirting skills from your sister," he mutters.

"Hey!" I glare at Marcus, he smiles sweetly at me.

"Dude, that's offensive," Reece places a hand on his heart.

Marcus and Edvard roll his eyes, "I'm the only single guy in here mate," Eduardo says.

"Really? But Shae, you're single?" I smirk and walk over to Tyler. I wrap both arms around his waist and place my head on his firm chest, uh so hot.

"I'm Tyler, your sisters boyfriend," Tyler extends his arm past me, I feel his arm being shaken which means they are shaking hands.

"Reece Valentine."

"Obviously," Sam mutters rolling her eyes.

"Let's go now," Amy says.

||

"You look like a drag queen!" We all laugh very loudly at Marcus, he thought we were fixing up his face because it needs fixing and all but we decided to cover it in makeup.

"You HAVE to keep it on!" Amy says emphasising the have.

"No," he frowns.

"Yes, c'mon Mark be a man!" The guys pound their fists on their chests.

People are looking at him strangely, like he's a freak which he is so I totally agree with them.

"Um, I'm not being a man if I'm wearing makeup!" He shouts, "get it off of me!"

"Oh my god, Shae?" I spin around and grin when I see Amanda, the woman that I said Marcus has an erectile dysfunction to.

"Amanda!" I look at Marcus in the corner of my eye. He looks at the sky shaking his head like he's cursing the gods.

"Why me?" He mutters.

"I'm so happy to see you. Did you go on with the operation?" She asks with a smile.

"Actually no, before the operation we are just going full out shopping for him. We are testing makeup on him, he begged for some," I nod.

"Oh, really? Oh there you are Marcus!" Amanda grins when seeing him then her mouth opens in shock when she sees the makeup. "Oh dear, I think this colour is a bit too light for him. The lipstick doesn't match either. But if I may ask... why are you getting him makeup?"

I look at Sam and Tyler, "well-" she cuts me off.

"Oh you're gay. I really respect that, it is perfectly fine. Oh I feel faint," she fans herself.

We snicker, Amy covers her mouth with her hand and everyone else bites their lips or sticks their fists in their mouths. All but one.

Marcus.

"Thank you for respecting that, he can't help it," but it is true, gay's can't really help it and I hate it how people treat them differently because they like the same gender as they are.

"Hugs?" She grins, I nod and we have a quick hug. She ends up hugging everyone in the group, in the end she says her goodbyes and wishes us all the best.

"Wow. You guys are the best friends to each other," Reece mutters, we all nod smiling at each other.

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