I let the not-so-godly god step inside and he immediately started analyzing the place, probably wondering why there weren't any statues of him or something like that.

Mom stacked the last pancake on her jenga-like pile and stepped out from behind the counter, giving our guests a tired smile.

Apollo's eyes widened in complete and utter horror. "Sacred Sibyl! Madam, there is something wrong with your midsection!"

I gave him a warning look, though I'm not sure if he saw it, or was just ignoring me.

"Well, I'm seven months pregnant," Mom explained, a proud tone tinting her words as she looked down at her slowly expanding belly.

Apollo looked appalled.

"How can you bear it?" he asked. "My mother, Leto, suffered through a long pregnancy, but only because Hera cursed her. Are you cursed?"

I stepped to Mom's side, standing right in front of him.

"Um, Apollo?" I said, trying my hardest not to offend him, "she's not cursed. And can you not mention Hera?"

"You poor woman." Apollo shook his head, completely ignoring me. "A goddess would never allow herself to be so encumbered. She would give birth as soon as she felt like it."

"That must be nice," Mom said, politely, though I heard the strained tips of her voice. He didn't know.

I coughed. "So, anyway, Mom, this is Apollo and his friend Meg. Guys, this is my mom."

"Call me Sally," Mom replied automatically, scanning Apollo's nose which was bent at an angle that was definitely not natural.

"Dear, that looks painful. What happened?" she asked.

Apollo averted his eyes, seeming to find a certain section of the floor very interesting.

"I'll tell you what," Mom said patting Apollo's shoulder, "Percy can help you get bandaged and cleaned up."

"I can?" I asked, giving the stack of pancakes a mournful look.

Mom looked at me sternly. "There's a first-aid kit in your bathroom, sweetheart. Apollo can take a shower, then wear your extra clothes. You two are about the same size."

"That," I said, "is truly depressing."

Mom cupped her hand under Meg's chin and looked her up and down.

"I have some clothes that might fit you, dear," Mom said. "Pre-pregnancy clothes, of course. Let's get you cleaned up. Then we'll get you something to eat."

"I like food," Meg muttered and I glared. Mom better not give me stack of pancakes away.

Mom laughed. "Well, we have that in common. Percy, you take Apollo. We'll meet you back here in a while."

***

I left Apollo in the bathroom to clean himself up. He was the god of medicine. He should know how to do stuff. Better than me, at least.

Apollo burst open the door, his nose making a trail of blood as he walked over to where I was sitting. Nose bleeds sucked. I could tell you that first hand.

"Sorry about that," he apologised, though it seemed more like an afterthought than an actual apology.

I spread my hands. "Actually, I was thinking about the last time I had a nosebleed."

"Oh..." Apollo muttered, looking at me thoughtfully. He didn't seem to know.

"What happened to you, man?" I asked, genuinely curious, "The war ended in August. It's January."

"It is?" Apollo asked, his eyes widening. Wow. He really didn't know anything.

"Last I saw you," I said, "Zeus was chewing you out at the Acropolis. Then bam! He vaporized you. Nobody's seen or heard from you for six months."

"I-I don't know where I've been," he said eventually, "I have some memory gaps."

I winced. "I hate memory gaps. Last year I lost an entire semester thanks to Hera."

"Ah, yes." Apollo replied, though his tone was similar to the one I used when I had absolutely no idea what the teacher had just said.

"Well, never fear," he continued, "there are always new opportunities to win fame! That's why I've come to you for help!"

I sighed. Curse the gods and their so-called ideas and opportunity for me.

"Look, man-" I started.

"Would you please refrain from calling me man?" Apollo interrupted. "It is a painful reminder that I am a man."

"Okay...Apollo, I'm fine with driving you and Meg to camp if that's what you want. I never turn away a demigod who needs help-"

"Wonderful!" Apollo cried,"Do you have something besides the Prius? A Maserati, perhaps? I'd settle for a Lamborghini."

"But," I continued, giving him another look, "I can't get involved in another Big Prophecy or whatever. I've made promises."

Apollo stared at me. "Promises?"

"I lost most of my junior year because of the war with Gaea. I've spent this entire fall playing catch-up with my classes. If I want to go to college with Annabeth next fall, I have to stay out of trouble and get my diploma," I explained. Honestly, most of our first year campers were brighter than this guy.

"Annabeth," Apollo said, "She's the blond scary one?"

I laughed a little at his description, which by the way, was completely on point.

"That's her." I said. "I promised her specifically that I wouldn't get myself killed while she's gone."

"Gone?"

I waved vaguely toward the north, hoping he'd believe my lie."She's in Boston for a few weeks. She has a family meeting. The point is-"

"You're saying you cannot offer me your undivided service to restore me to my throne?"

"Um...yeah." I pointed at the bedroom doorway. "Besides, my mom's pregnant. I'm going to have a baby sister. I'd like to be around to get to know her."

"Well, I understand that. I remember when Artemis was born-"

"Aren't you twins?"

"I've always regarded her as my little sister."

I glanced up at the ceiling, exhaling deeply. "Anyway, my mom's got that going on, and her first novel is going to be published this spring as well, so I'd like to stay alive long enough to-"

"Wonderful!" he said. "Remind her to burn the proper sacrifices. Calliope is quite touchy when novelists forget to thank her."

"Okay," I replied, not really listening anymore, "but what I'm saying... I can't go off on another world-stomping quest. I can't do that to my family."

I fiddled with my hands, thinking of all the promises I had made, broken and shattered. "I've already given my mom enough heart attacks for one lifetime. She's just about forgiven me for disappearing last year, but I swore to her and Paul that I wouldn't do anything like that again."

"Paul?"

"My stepdad. He's at a teacher in-service today. He's a good guy."

"I see," he said, in same monotonous manner. "You do understand that I must find a way to return to Olympus. This will probably involve many harrowing trials with a high chance of death. Can you turn down such glory?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I can. Sorry," I replied bluntly, causing the ex-god to pout.

"I understand," he announced at last. "You will at least escort us to Camp Half-Blood?"

"That I can do," I said reached into my pocket for Riptide, a fringe stretching the corners of my mouth."Let's see if Meg's ready for a field trip."