Chapter 40

Harry's POV

I'm smiling like an idiot. Again, Louis has helped me, he doesn't even know it. All I needed was someone to care, Louis did just that. Ok so maybe I shouldn't have lied saying "I'm great" when he asked...but I can't tell him I'm sitting here cutting myself, he thinks I'm trying to quit, I'm not, obviously...I can't....it's an addiction, it's too late to turn back now...if I've gone too far I don't care.

I checked my phone 5:02pm

Hopefully Louis and his "friend" will hurry up, I want Louis so badly right now you have no idea...I wonder why he didn't tell me he was with Eleanor, does he not want me to know? I already do, I still don't know if he loves her, he told me he loved me but it was just a text, I still can't be sure.

I sighed, picking up my blade and rinsing it off, I cleaned up the blood on the floor the best I could, I picked up my phone and stuffed in my pocket, along with my blade. I slipped into my sweater and washed my hands, I stared at my reflection in mirror, I looked so tired and empty these days, almost as if I was just a shell, not really even alive, just...there. I quietly opened the door and snuck into my bedroom, I ripped open a drawer and buried my blade under a few shirts.

I walked into the living room and sat on the couch, at least Louis will be back soon...I don't like being alone...I know Liam, Zayn, and Niall are here, but I feel so alone without Louis...

Sorry it's short again :( we've been really busy, I'll try to start writing more. xx