Two weeks later...

I had a brother who always cared for me. My brother was always there for me, when my father could not be. A role model to look up to — a truthful, brave and loving brother. Who showed me that a man is nothing without Allah s.w.t, who showed me that honesty is the best language. He is no longer in my life anymore, and his death should not be an excuse to be a ruthless person.

I find it easier to hide my emotions in my work, the more I work the less I have to feel. I was not always like this, an uptight, rude Mr Ahmed Damari. It was the night my brother, Imad's father died along with his wife — that happiness turned into an illusion. A mirage. A sham that keeps you from dealing with the real world.

I know I am not the person my brother wanted me to be. Even I sometimes fail to understand myself. I am disappointed in myself, just as much as he would have been. Imad looks exactly likes his father, shares only his mothers kind eyes. In a way being around him, makes me want to be a better version of myself. I have been running away from the truth for so long, now I realize...

"Sir." Alice, Imads new Nanny swings wide open the door, intruding into my office. I look at her, her hand on her chest and gasping for air.

"What is it?" I ask, and stand up.

"It's Imad." she breathes in, "He fainted."

"What! Where is he?" I run out of my office, Alice running behind me.

"He is in his bedroom," she replies, her voice falling into the background. All I could hear was my heartbeat rising, and my mind cumulating thoughts, that I don't want to consider. I reach his bedroom and see him laying on the floor, looking lifeless. I check for his pulse first to reassure my heart — it's there but it's weak. I carry him, all the way outside to my car. Alice follows me, I tell her to sit at the back with him.

I start to drive, as fast as I could.

"Is he still breathing?" I ask Alice.

"Yes," she replies. Alice started to cry, I could hear silent sobs. "This is all my fault," she says, her words caught between her tears.

"What are you talking about?" I ask. Focusing on getting to the hospital as fast I could drive.

"Imad has not been eating properly he barely touches his food, he has been spending most of his time sulking or crying and all he would say is that he wants to see Layla. I thought he would get over it. Sometimes kids can be fussy about eating. I didn't know... I didn't know it would worsen. I should have told you," she explained, still crying. Anger boiled within, I clenched onto the steering wheel.

"Yes you should have," I reply in a low tone. We reach the hospital, praying to God that it's not too late. I carried Imad all the way into the hospital. I started yelling for help. A gurney was wheeled towards me by two nurses. I kept Imad on the gurney. Another nurse approached me advising me to wait in the waiting room and fill in some papers, when I should be with my nephew. I should be with him...

This is all my fault. I did this to him, it's because of me that he is in the hospital. I took away the only thing constant in his life. Alice waited in the waiting room along with me, still in tears. I approach her. "I need you to do something for me," I tell her. "Actually for Imad."

"Anything Sir," she said and stood up.

"Find Layla. I'll text you her number and her address. Find her and bring her to the hospital," I instructed her.

"Okay," she replied. I sent her Layla's number and address and she left. I paced back and forth, thinking of how my actions affected Imad. I held my phone in my hand, looking at the minutes pass by, and praying to Allah that he is okay. After thirty minutes of waiting, which felt like a lifetime, the doctor finally comes.

"Hi I am Doctor William," he introduces himself. "You are Imad's...?" I stand up and shack his hand.

"Uncle. I am his uncle," I quickly reply. "Is he okay?"

"Yes he is fine, he is stable. Some tests were ran and his blood sugar is low. He fainted due to the lack of sugar in his body. So I gave him a glucagon shot, his blood sugar should be leveled by now," he explained. "Has he been skipping meals or doing excessive exercise?"

"He hasn't been eating well," I reply.

"Okay, and I also noticed that he has dark circles under his eyes. Does he usually have trouble sleeping?"

"I am not sure." It struck me that I know nothing about my nephew.I am rarely at home, I couldn't even take care of him.When I fired Layla I didn't do it because of him, I did it because of me. My selfishness.

"Some factors do contribute that he might be depressed. But I do not want to conclude until I am sure," he said.

"Depression? But he is just a kid... Can I see him now?

"Yes children can get depression, drastic change in his life could be a cause for it. Yes you can see him, he is in a private room just as you requested." Low blood sugar? Depressed? This is my doing, I should have been there for him. I follow the doctor, he leads me to the private room. He says that he will come back later and check up on him. I enter the room and see Imad, awake watching cartoon on the television. Alhamdulillah.

"Hi there Imad," I walk to him and stand besides him.

"Hi Uncle Ahmed," he says, with a faint smile on his face.

"How are you feeling?" I ask him.

"I am okay. Is Layla coming to see me in the hospital? I know she traveled but can't she come back..." he spoke, his voice breaking. Almost in tears. I held his hand.

"Of course Layla will come and visit you. She loves you very much and I am sure when she hears you are in the hospital, she will come to see you as soon as she can. You know she will be mad if she finds out you haven't been eating."

"I know... please don't tell her."

"I won't tell her, only if you will eat when the nurse brings you your food."

"Okay I will." He continues to watch the cartoon, tears linger in my eyelids. I caused him all this suffering, Imad doesn't deserve this.

...

"Hey I am looking for Layla," Alice says.

"Oh Layla? she moved out about three days ago. She was a nice girl, always paid her rent on time," The landlord replies.

"Do you know where I can find her?"

"No sorry, she didn't tell me anything about where she's going."

❤️