"Get away from my daughter and get out of my house."

The cruel words ring in my head as I dash up the stairs away from Emerald and her fuming father. I don't even go get my bag from her room before leaving the house, only pausing to slip on my sneakers. At least my phone is in my pocket.

Once outside, I don't stop running. I speed down the lane, turn left, and keep going down the road. My lungs are burning and my head is starting to spin, but I can't catch my breath even if I wanted to stop and try, because I'm crying. Hard. The only thing illuminating my path is the moon and some streetlights and I only stop when I'm about half a mile away from the house where I find a solitary bench on a street corner.

How did everything go to shit in such a short amount of time? He just had to come downstairs at that moment. That otherwise perfect moment... and to think I was so excited for this night. Now I'm not sure I'll ever be able to go back there. But what do I do now? It's like 9PM and Gee isn't home because he's out somewhere with Frank and the others.

With trembling hands, I pull my phone out of my pocket anyway. I only have five contacts: Em, Frank, Gee, Mikey, and Ray. I can't sit on this stupidly cold bench all night; I don't have a jacket on and I don't fancy dying of hypothermia. I need to call someone.

I let it ring many times, my tears falling quicker with every passing second, but Gerard doesn't pick up.

Great.

I wrap my arms around myself, not bothering to stifle my sobs. Fuck Emerald's father and his fucking outdated ideas. Fuck. Him.

I look up at the stars and scream it out, "Fuck him!" Anger and pain are apparent in my voice. Good thing I'm alone—

I hear a startled scream ring out from the other side of the street.

Evelyn, you idiot. It's Halloween. People are outside tonight.

"Um, sorry!" I call out hesitantly.

No response. Just footsteps hurrying in the other direction, away from me. Just like everyone and everything else in my life; they've left.

I'm so pathetic, aren't I? I should've known better than to kiss her back. I'm still in shock that she did what she did, though. I mean, who would want to kiss me in the first place? I'm, well, I'm worthless. I'm cowardly, annoying, good for nothing, ugly, untalented, stupid, fat.

That's right, Evelyn. You're disgusting.

Oh, fuck off.

Never.

What did I ever do? Why can't I just be normal? I don't like this person I've become. Always lying, always worrying. Oh, and falling for a girl I can never have. Especially not after that.

I'm crying harder now, these thoughts swirling around my head are becoming too much. I try calling Gerard again.

Still, no answer.

You know what? Maybe I deserve this. I'm freezing, shaking uncontrollably, and I deserve this. The night is silent other than my crying, and I deserve this pain. The streetlight above me at least gives off a falsely comforting glow. I look up at it, seeing a few moths buzzing around the light, and then it flickers a few times.

The streetlight goes out.

I guess I'm truly alone now, only with the moon above me to keep me company.

I try calling Gerard again every few minutes. I try calling Mikey, Ray, and Frank, too. I'm desperate. It's about 10:30PM when, after dozens of attempts, my phone actually starts to ring.

"H-hello?"

"Evelyn, I'm so sorry I missed your calls! Are you okay?" It's Ray.

"G-Gee, I- I need Gee." I can't get any clear words out thanks to my chattering teeth and still incessant tears.

"Okay, um," I can imagine him looking around frantically, "hold on, he's coming. Take a breath, okay Eve?"

"I... I c-can't... I need G—"

I hear a slight commotion coming from Ray's end of the call before Gerard's voice just about deafens me. "Evelyn, what happened!?"

"Em- Emerald... we were... he— her d-dad—"

"Eve, I need you to calm down a bit. Can you do that for me?"

I do my best to take a deep breath then choke out, "I- I need you to come— come and get me. Come and get me, p-please."

"Are you still at Emerald's house?"

"N-no."

"Where are you?"

"I don't know... not very far from her house. I'm on a bench."

"Do you see any street signs?"

I look around and see a sign slightly obscured by some tree branches, "Um... Oak Street?"

"Be there soon, Eve. Hang in there." At those rushed words, he hangs up.

About 15 minutes later, I'm blinded by the headlights of a car. It slows to a stop in front of me, but I can't move from where I'm curled up, basically frozen to this fucking bench.

I see that Ray is the one driving when Gee hops out of the passenger side and runs toward me.

"Evelyn! Holy shit," he takes his jacket off and puts it over my shoulders. It reeks of the environment he'd previously been in; like cigarette smoke and liquor and sweat. The scent reminds me of when my mother would come home after a night spent at some bar. Drunk and stumbling, of course.

My breath quickens.

Gee picks me up easily and places me in the back seat of the car. He gets in after me and Ray looks back at us, "What—"

"Fucking drive, Ray. Take us home." Gerard's voice is laced with worry and impatience. He wraps his arms around me and I feel like I'm suffocating but I don't care at this point. All I can think about is how cold I am, how much I want to be home, and the look on Emerald's dad's face when he saw us.

More hot tears spill from my eyes and I bury my face in Gerard's chest. He holds me tightly, whispering something I can't decipher, but comforting all the same.

I'm relieved that he hasn't asked any questions.

It could be seconds or hours later when we finally get home— my head is all mixed up— but I'm glad we have.

"C'mon, Eve. We're home now," Gerard picks me up again and carries me into the house. Looking over his shoulder, he mouths something to Ray who's still in the driver's seat, just as bewildered as he was when he first called me back to be greeted with my panicked state.

He takes me to the living room, sets me on the couch gently, then immediately puts a blanket over me.

Shit.

Shit shit shit.

I repeated the word in my head after I hung up Ray's phone and handed it back to him. He insisted on coming with me and I didn't argue, just wanting to get to Eve as quickly as possible.

The word still played in my head when we ran out to his car.

It wouldn't stop when we approached the destination Evelyn said she was at.

And, now, it's still ringing through my mind over and over as Eve's eyes, full of pain, refuse to meet my own. She looks so broken, wrapped up in a blanket, tears still fresh on her face. I sit next to her and put my arm around her shoulder, holding her close. She lays her head on me, still sniffling.

I don't know what to do. I can't help if I don't know what happened, but is it too soon to ask? Will she break down again if I force her to remember whatever it was that happened?

"Evelyn," I start. She hums to let me know she's listening. "Did, um, did you and Emerald get in a fight?"

"No."

"Did she say something to you, then?"

"No."

I sigh, "Do you want to tell me what happened so I can try to help?"

"Not really."

"That's okay."

"No, it's not."

"What do you mean, Eve? You don't have to talk right now if you don't want to."

She's silent for about ten seconds before she speaks in a strangled voice, "I just... I just want to be normal."

My heart breaks at those words as she dissolves into tears again. I almost start crying myself, but I won't. "No, Evelyn, don't even say that. What the fuck is normal anyway? No one is normal."

"Y-you, you're normal. I'm just messed up. I'm messed up, Gee."

"Whatever you think normal means, I'm not it."

She looks up at me with red eyes as if she's never met me before. As if she's just suddenly found herself with her head on a stranger's shoulder. "What?"

"No one is normal, alright? And I don't think you're messed up, Evie, but I'm telling you now that it's okay to be messed up. We just have to stick together and find a way to get through it, okay?"

"Okay."

• • •