I couldn't sleep. I've been laying on my bed for the last two hours simply staring at the ceiling lost in thought.

After Brooks left me in the hallway I remained standing there for a few minutes before I made my way back. Brooks was gone by the time I arrived and the girls were ready to leave so Royce agreed to drive them home so I didn't have to. I could tell they were curious about what happened between Brooks and me but they never asked.

When I got home I took a shower, then climbed into bed where I've been staring at the ceiling ever since.

My conversation with Brooks has been playing in my head on a constant loop for the last two hours. Especially the last thing he said to me before he left.

You deserve a chance to be happy again.

Mia was right when she said that I didn't feel like I deserve to be happy and live my life.

After the accident, I felt like I didn't have the right to be happy or move on with my life when it was my fault Eli died that night. If I hadn't suggested going to the beach he would be alive.

I haven't been truly happy in a long time. Content yes but not happy. Brooks brought out a part of me that I thought died that night. He made me happy.

Isn't that was everyone searches for in life? Something to make them happy, something to look forward to.

I'm beginning to have that with Brooks, so what am I waiting for? I more than anyone knew how fleeting life can be. How in a split second your life can change so I shouldn't waste wait a minute of it.

I didn't wait to second-guess myself, instead, I hopped out of bed and slipped my feet into a pair of uggs. I then swiped my phone and keys off my nightstand and rushed out of my bedroom.

I grabbed my coat off the rack by the front door and slipped it over the cropped tank top and sleep shorts I wore to bed. After I locked the front door, I hopped in my car and pulled out of my driveway.

Five minutes later I pulled up in front of Brooks's house. Picking up my phone I hit call before lifting the phone to my ear.

What if he was sleeping? Doubt slowly began to creep in.

Ugh! Gen you really didn't think this through. I nervously tapped my fingers on the steering wheel as I waited for him to answer and he finally did on the third ring.

"Gen?" I could hear the concern seeping into his voice. "It's late what's wrong."

"Hey, I'm fine but I'm outside come and open the door," I replied as I switched off the engine and climbed out of my car.

"What? I'm coming," he said and I heard shuffling and a door closing in the background before he hung up as I made my way up the driveway.

I was a few feet away from the door when it flew open revealing Brooks standing there in a grey t-shirt and black sweatpants.

"Gen, what going on?" He asked as I stopped directly in front of him, his gaze roving over me as if he was ensuring I was really okay.

I could've said a million different things at that moment instead, I blurted out. "I like you too."

"What?" He asked confused his eyebrows pulling down in a frown.

"I like you too," I repeated. "I was laying on my bed and when I realized it, not that I like you I already knew that for a while now," I corrected as I nervously rubbed my sweaty palms on my coat. Why was I so nervous?

What I was saying finally sank in because the confusion and concern on Brooks's face melted away and a wide smile stretched across his lips. His reaction gave me the courage I needed to continue.

"What I realized was I couldn't keep hiding away from life because of what happened to Eli. You make me happy Brooks, and I want to be with you too if you still want that," he didn't say anything he just stood there silently staring down at me with an intense look in his eyes.

I shifted nervously on my feet. "I should've called before I just showed up I probably look like a crazy person but I just wanted to see you and tell you," my ramble was cut off when Brooks's lips came crashing down on mine.

I froze in shock for a split second before I kissed him back. Wrapping my arms around his neck as his hands gripped my hips and pulling me flush against his body.

All too soon Brooks broke the kiss pulling back and resting his forehead against mine.

"You're adorable when you ramble you that?" he teased.

I chuckled a little breathlessly. "Shut up I was nervous and you weren't saying anything," I smiled.

"You sure you want to do this?" He asked pressing a soft kiss on the tip of my nose.

"I'm sure," I whispered wrapping my arms around his waist.

He brushed a kiss on my forehead before lacing his fingers with mine. "Let's go inside," he said and I followed after him shutting the door behind us.

"You want to come upstairs?" He asked peering down at me expectantly.

"Yeah," I whispered with our hands still firmly entwined together, we climbed the stairs and made our way toward Brooks's bedroom.

Pulling the door open Brooks motioned for me to enter before him. Releasing his hand I stepped into the bedroom. I hadn't been back here since the night of Brooks's party.

Slipping my coat off I dropped it on the chair in the corner of the room before I spurned around to face Brooks.

His eyes trailed down my body lingering on my hard nipples poking through the thin material of my crop tank top. I felt goosebumps speared across my skin at his heated gaze as he strode in my direction.

I sucked in a sharp breath when he brushed his knuckles over my pebbled nipple. "No bra?" He asked with a raised brow.

I shook my head. "I didn't-," my words died on a gasp when his thumb pressed down on my nipple sending a bolt of pleasure straight from my breast to my clit.

Lifting his hand he freed my hair from the confines of the messy bun I had it in, my thick curls falling down my back and over my shoulders.

"I like your hair better like this," he rasped tangling his fingers in my hair and holding me in place as he leaned down and pressed a bruising kiss on my lips.

Unlike the one downstairs, there was nothing soft about this kiss. Wrapping my arms around his neck I kissed him back hard. Fisting his jersey I pulled him closer until our bodies were molded together.

I could feel his thick erection pressing against my stomach. I moaned when his tongue slid into my mouth, grasping my hips in his large hand he effortlessly lift me off my feet, and I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist.

Without breaking the kiss Brooks carried me over to the bed where he threw me down and I landed on my back with a bounce. He quickly climbed on top of me settling between my legs. Knotting my fingers through his hair I pulled his lips back down on mine.

"Brooks," I whimpered against his lips arching into him when he ground his erection between my legs. "That feels so good," I said rocking into him. I couldn't think, I could barely breathe all I could do was feel.

"Fuck," he groaned gripping my hips with his hands as he stilled my movements. Pressing his face into the croak of my neck he took a deep breath before he pulled back and looked down at me. "I want nothing more than to fuck you right now, but we should at least go on a date first I don't want you to think that this is just about sex to me," he said.

"I don't think that," I whispered truthfully lifting my fingers and brushing them between his brows smoothening out the frown lines etched on his forehead.

"Good," he replied. Leaning down he kissed his way up the slope of my neck, I shivered when he nibbed on my earlobe before he whispered. "And you know just because I not going to fuck you tonight doesn't mean I can't do other things to you," he said leaning back and peering down at me. "If that's what you want?" He arched a brow.

I nodded and he shook his head. "Use your words beautiful I want to hear you say it," he demanded his voice thick with need while he pressed a soft kiss on the underside of my jaw.

"Yes, I want that," I panted and I felt him smile against my skin before he dragged his lips down my neck and over my chest. Pulling down my tank top he lavished my breasts with kisses

until I was a squirming mess on the bed. Finally, he sucked my left nipple into his hot mouth causing my back to arch off the bed. A low moan fell from my mouth as my hands found their way under his t-shirt my fingers digging into his back.

Sitting back he pulled his shirt over his head before he slipped his fingers beneath the waistband of my shorts tugging them and my panties down my legs.

"Ahh!" I cried when his thumb circled my aching clit. I bucked my hips up in desperate need of more.

"Stop teasing me," I practically growl with frustration. A smirk curled at the edge of his lips as he lifted his free hand and pinched my left nipple hard causing me to whimper.

"Don't rush me I've wanted this for a long time I'm going to take my time," he said while his fingers continued their slow torturous circles on my clit driving me crazy before he finally slipped a finger inside me quickly followed by another one.

Crying out I clenched around his fingers my nails biting into his taunt shoulders.

"Fuck," he murmured against my lips slowly thrusting his fingers inside me before curling his fingers and hitting my G-spot.

"Yes," I moaned as he began to move his fingers faster and faster. I could feel my orgasm building inside me as I moved my hips in rhythm with his fingers chasing my release.

Oh God, I was going to come. It felt like every nerve ending in my body sparked to life.

"That's it, baby," Brooks rasped vigorously massaging my clit with his thumb. "Come on my fingers," he murmured right before he bent his head sucking my nipple into his mouth hard. And I shattered, my eyes slamming shut and my body shuddering as I screamed my release.

That felt amazing it has been a long time since I had someone else's fingers inside me besides my own.

When my orgasm subsided, I reopened my eyes, my gaze landed on Brooks who was kneeling over me, his eyes heavy-lidded with lust as he furiously rubbed his hand up and down his thick, hard length.

Sitting up I leaned forward and swirled my thumb around the bead of precum on his tip with my hooded gaze trained on his I brought my thumb to my lips sucking it into my mouth.

"Shit, you're going to kill me, Gen," he groaned, his teeth digging into his bottom lip. Mirroring his position on the bed I motioned for him to drop his hand and I replaced it with mine.

Wrapping my fingers around his thick shaft I pumped him from base to tip. "I'm not going to last long," I was rewarded with a throaty groan when I quickened the pace of my hand. Tipping his head forward Brooks captured my lips in a greedy kiss as I continued to work him over with quick strokes.

He thrust into my with hand a low groan as he plunged his tongue into my mouth and I sucked on it. "Baby, I'm gonna come," he groaned against my lips. Breaking the kiss I bent my head and quickly took him into my mouth.

My lips stretched around his wide girth and sucked hard I felt his body tremble as his fingers tangled in my hair holding me in his place as he came down my throat with a loud groan and I swallowed.

When I straightened Brooks was staring at me with droopy eyes. He sagged against me and

we both tumbled on the bed in a tangle of arms and legs. Brooks pulled me into his arms and I rest my head on his shoulder burrowing my face in the croak of his neck as he caught his breath.

Tonight we crossed a line we can't uncross but I don't care because I'm exactly where I want to be.