Abby told me to pull over and left the car immediately when we stopped. I followed her into the field, passing over the giant sunflowers and almost losing Abby there. My camera was hung over my neck and I got a few shots before we got to the regular photo shooting session.

"Is this pose okay?"

She was holding a sunflower, looking at me. Her smile widened as I brought to the camera up before my eyes and looked at her through the lens. "Don't look at me," I suggested, "pretend to smell it."

She obeyed my suggestion and did as she was told. I'd taken a few shots, closer and further. Then, she looked at me and we tried a few other poses before she demanded to see the shots. She'd liked the one she smiled at the camera but my favorite was still the first one—she was looking down at the sunflower. Her braid looked fascinating there. I could even post it on my Instagram.

"Your turn."

"No," I said, laughing as she took the camera off my hands. "It's not necessary."

"Come on, it's gonna be great."

I didn't feel comfortable in front of a camera but I didn't tell her. She took a few shots of me, most of which she told me how to pose and where to stand. After she looked at them, she told me they were good enough and I should have put one of them online.

"Put your phone into your pocket." She looked at me incredulously. "We are here—we should enjoy the moment, come on." Doing what I said, she held the hand I extended out and we started walking between the sunflowers. Her hand was warm against mine and I was glad she didn't question it. I'd hold her hand countless times but walking with holding hands? It didn't happen often.

We walked all the way back to the car in that position. When I released her hand to walk to the driver's door, she flashed me a smile before getting in. She shot me right in the heart with Eros' arrow. God help me.

As we drove off to our next stop, she turned on the radio and let the music fill the silence. I was filled with encouragement from our previous touch so I just reached out to hold her hand that was resting beside mine. She didn't withdraw her hand so I dared look at her sideways. She was looking out of the window so I couldn't see her expression.

We were stepping into the different territory; so fragile that would shatter if spoken.

In Riverton, she guided us to that budget-friendly place. It was small but cozy, with a few people occupying the tables. We sat down at one in front of the window and ordered two chicken sandwiches. When they arrived, she waited for me to take the first bite. "It's good," I commented.

Satisfied, she took a bite as well. "It really is." When I expected her to open up a conversation about our earlier holding hands session, she didn't touch upon that subject and we talked about the rest of our plan. She said we were catching up with our schedule and we would be able to travel in fifteen days at this pace. Today we would spend the night in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

When I listened to her, my eyes drifted on the mayo at the side of her lips, and I fought to urge her not to wipe it with my finger. It would be an inappropriate move—or would it be? We were best friends, and I'd touched her before without calculating my moves. Now, I was extra sensitive because my feelings were in the equation—but she wouldn't know that.

So, leaning forward, I wiped off the mayo and licked my finger. "Got mayo on your lips."

"Thanks," she said, smiling, and continued to tell me what she had planned. See? She didn't even notice.

Though I didn't tell her, I'd also gotten my own plans for tonight.

After lunch, we were off to explore the rest of Kansas—and we stopped by the Rainbow Bridge to take some photos. Then, Oklahoma. On the way, Abby was telling us that we couldn't really get to see a good portion of Kansas and we should come to visit it separately sometime later.

"Well, maybe next summer when you come to visit us."

"I always forget I'll be flying off to New York soon."

As she voiced it out, my heart made a turn—I didn't have much left. "You deserve it and you'll excel in your studies there as always."

"And you will come to visit me," she assured. "We can meet in our breaks."

I nodded with a smile.

Since we spent more time than intended in the sunflower field, we cut off the stops in between and headed right to Tulsa since it was nearing the evening. I'd found a great park where we could park and also spend the night.

As Abby said she would grab the blankets from the truck, I searched for something in my bag and finally found it tucked in my wallet. Putting it inside my pocket, for the time being, I left the car and followed her to the spot she'd spread the blankets. We also had Sprite from the other day and our solo cups.

"No drinking today," she said, filling our cups with the liquid as she plopped down.

"In college, you should attend the parties," I started off, taking a sip. "They are a good way to mingle."

Pulling her legs to her stomach, she sighed. "You know I hate crowded places."

"Yes, and I offer you a private lesson here to overcome your fears."

"Here?"

"Yep." Pulling out the pocket, I spread it out. Her eyes widened at the sight. I tilted my gaze at hers. "People love smoking joints."

"I'll not try that," she laughed nervously.

"Live a little." I let her watch me as I rolled up a joint and licked the side of the paper to glue. "Come on, try it." She looked at me hesitatingly. I nodded to encourage her and she slowly approached to take a paper.

When I expected to fail, she rolled the joint perfectly in one go. Though nervous, she looked so attractive while licking off the paper and gluing it. "You're a natural," I breathed as she smiled at her accomplishment. "Wow."

"I'm not smoking this shit though."

"Don't be a buzz killer." She sighed. "Abby, we are not high school kids anymore. You should broaden your comfort zones. You don't suddenly become evil for doing drugs." Handing her the lighter, I added, "Come on. It will be all fine. Try it. It feels fucking good."

Hesitatingly, she lit up the joint and brought it to her mouth, her eyes never leaving mine. As she inhaled a breath, she started coughing. "What the fuck is this shit?"

I laughed at her reaction and lit mine. "First fill your lungs,"—I breathed in and huffed it out—" and let it out." She coughed again but I could see that she was intrigued. She tried again and this time, she didn't cough. As she blew the smoke out, she asked, "Where did you find this?"

"Got my connections."

"You promised not to smoke, George."

"This is different—this is marijuana."

She took a few inhales and I could see the shift in her mood already. It was going straight to my head as well, so I would also feel high soon. Drugs always did it for me, taking me to different places where alcohol failed. We silently stood there for a while, lost in our own clouds but it was no surprise Abby was high after a while.

"George." She suddenly stood up and grabbed my hand to pull me up. "Dance with me."

"With no music?"

When she wrapped my arms around her waist and hooked her arms around my neck, I didn't need anything else to confirm that she was high. She slowly swayed her hips as if there was a song in the background and looked at me in the eyes.

Everyone was looking at us like we were freaks—which we looked so—but I didn't really care. To share this precious moment with her was worth being labeled anything. We danced like that until she wore out and sat back on the blanket. "Got more of that thing?"

"Marijuana?"

"Yes," she said eagerly.

"It's enough for tonight, don't ya think?"

When she figured out I wasn't keen on handing her another joint, she relit the one she butted before and took another inhale. "I feel so good—so free." She laughed. "George, I feel so brave." She chuckled. "Like things don't feel so unbearable right now. Is this heaven?"

I wasn't as high as her but I couldn't say I was stable either. Deciding that the right way to keep her in control was to take her back to the car, I attempted to get up and pulled her with me. Leaving the blankets there to collect in the morning, I walked her slowly off to the car.

After stumbling our way back, I pulled open the back door and tucked her in first. Abby's hand pulled me inside along with her, and I took a moment to shut the door. I watched her as she leaned her back against the door and put her legs on my lap. With the adrenaline flooding within me, I concluded that maybe marijuana wasn't the right thing—I could barely hold my shit together and now, we were both high.

"Help me," she slurred, reaching forward to remove her cowboy boots, but I grabbed the heel and discarded them one by one, throwing them somewhere in the car. Then, I removed my jacket, for it was so hot inside or maybe it was just me. It was hard to think reasonably when her legs rested on the top of mine and there wasn't enough gap between us.

As if she wanted to mimic me, Abby tried to pull the zip down of her leather jacket but it got stuck somewhere. "Shit," she whispered, looking down at her unstable hands. Coming to her rescue, I swatted her hands away, scooted closer to her, and tried to pull it down but suddenly, the zip doubled and I didn't know which one would do.

"Why do you have two zips?"

She looked at me as I said something so funny. Next, she started laughing. "I don't know."

After a few minutes of struggling, I managed to get the zip down and helped her take the jacket off her shoulders. I couldn't keep my head up at all so, at some point, I just buried it into where her neckline met her shoulder. Her skin felt so soft against my lips and her rapid pulse kept me awake. I remained there, her scent filling my lungs until I was stable enough. I knew I had to get up as soon as possible.

Abby placed her hand flat against my chest and pushed me slightly so that we were facing each other. She was basically sitting on my lap, and her chest created friction against mine as it rose and sank. Her eyes zeroed on my lips and my eyes quickly followed hers. I was still in the process of understanding what was going on when she cradled my face and kissed me.

It was a simple touch but it burned my skin. She pulled back immediately, tilting her gaze to mine as if she wanted to see my reaction. But I waited too long for this—that she didn't know. So, before a seed of doubt could plant in her mind, I pulled her back and covered her lips. Shifting her position, she straddled my legs and I angled my face so that I could get more of her.

When we couldn't fit a certain rhythm, for I was too eager and she was slower to follow, I paused. When her inquisitive eyes found me, I whispered, "Let me." I started off slow this time, savoring every touch and wasting no breath. The more she adjusted to the pace the greedier and more passionate the kiss grew. She ground against me, knowingly or unknowingly, but that made me lose all the control I had left. Even though through layers, each movement made it harder to carry this kiss out and made me crave for more. It was taking everything in me not to lay her down and take things to the next base. My arm wrapped around her small back and pulled her closer so that we were standing flush against each other. When I thought this would let me ease a little, it only added more to the spice.

When I traced lower and touched her bare skin under the hem, that took her off guard in the form of a gasp. That allowed me into her mouth as my other hand rested on her hair. Her stable hands on my chest started moving, one of them grasping my shoulder and the other trailing down to the hem of my t-shirt.

I couldn't think of anything when her hands traveled over my body and I craved to see her eyes but she kept them firmly shut as we continued to kiss. She let out a hiss when I bit her bottom lip and I covered her throat to feel every move. I didn't expect her to pull up my t-shirt—she pulled it apart and took it off swiftly.

It suddenly dawned on me: I had just taken her first kiss and I was about to take her virginity.

Before I could give further thought, her fingers danced on my bare chest, making me forget my own name. "Abby." My body was reacting in the opposite way and her t-shirt joined mine on our side soon after. She opened her eyes for the first time as she pulled back. I was afraid of her getting off and asking what we were doing because I had no intelligible answer to that.

This pause made me examine her, for she stood so close. If I thought she was beautiful before, I didn't know how to define her now. Her eyes were a darker shade of blue, and her blonde hair was sparkling under the moonlight looming over us. Her cheeks were flushed, her lips swollen and her breaths unsteady. Letting my eyes ride down, I took in her smooth skin in contrast with her black lace bra.

I was in a dream, and I didn't ever want to wake up.

When she grabbed my shoulders and motioned me until she lay flat on her back and I hovered over her, propping myself with one arm beside her head. Where they should have been a dozen questions with a bunch of doubt, there was only one thing: Abby. My heart whispered her name with each pump and it was like she was running in my veins. When I licked my lips, it was her that I tasted.

I planted my head down on her neck again, burying my nose to take her heavenly scent in. I lived in the moment as if it was my first but also the last. Tomorrow, she wouldn't let me be this close so I had to spend every second as if we had none. I could comprehend that she was skeptical of my sudden lack of movement, but her pulse picked up again when I started leaving butterfly kisses on her neck this time. Her neck arched simultaneously and her arm snaked around my neck to pull me closer. My kisses followed the path of her neck down to her shoulder and onto the swell right before her bra started.

I paused. What the fuck are we doing? Sensing my pause, she said, "George."

Jolted awake by her voice, I pulled back hastily and she immediately tilted her back up, meeting my gaze. She only wanted me because she was high. And she was high because I made her do drugs.

"George," she repeated, pulling closer to me, and holding my hand. When I held her gaze, she smiled gingerly, "What's wrong?" I just took advantage of her situation. I was almost taking her virginity in a car. Was I really this desperate? There was a possibility that she wouldn't even remember her first kiss tomorrow—and it was taken by me. This is wrong—I wanted to say but she wouldn't get me now.

Searching for our t-shirts, I found them fallen on the ground and threw hers on her chest. When I quickly put mine on, I tried so hard not to look into her eyes. "I need to get some air."

She didn't stop me nor did she ask any more questions. When I hopped out of the car, she didn't once call after me and for that, I was glad. Because if she did, I wouldn't be able to leave her there and all I had in the morning would be the bitter taste of regret.

Outside the fog in my mind started to clear out, and I walked away until I had a safe distance from our car—not too far so it was still within my peripheral vision but enough to contain myself.

Though my heart was happy that it happened, I wish we hadn't stepped into the dark. I couldn't get her eyes out of my mind when I pulled back. She looked disappointed—or that was how I interpreted it.

She only wanted you because she was high. This was what I repeated over and over the following hour. Since I forgot to take my jacket with me, I started getting cold but I didn't get back to the car until I was sure she fell asleep. I didn't want to get back into that tension with her.

After it passed a couple of hours, the fire within me soothed, and I was tired enough to doze off, I walked back to the car. When I slipped into the driver's seat, I turned back to find her sleeping in the backseat. She'd worn her t-shirt back and her arms were wrapped around her as if she was cold. I kneeled down to grab my jacket and cover her torso.

Letting out a sigh, I shut my eyes. This night had been both a dream and a nightmare—but I could only imagine what was about to come.

***

Hey!

This chapter came so easily and I'm actually proud of it. Your opinions mean a lot so please don't hesitate to share them! ❤️

❤️I love you all,

Sev xx