Our walk in the rain was already a fortnight ago. A harmless teenage party game turned out to be an emotional journey into the past. And if I had known the dark secret behind Alec's scar, I would never have asked this question. His tears touched me deeply and also the way he talked about it. Alec is young, smart, strong-willed, a good listener and a wonderful conversationalist. It wasn't a lie what I said to him there in the park surrounded by raindrops and dark clouds. My mum would have loved him.

Since that day our life together has changed. Every evening Alec comes home tired and exhausted. He stands in the hallway and removes his clothes, which are dirty from work. Every evening I watch him enter the living area dressed only in boxer shorts and after a quick 'Hello Magnus.' he disappears straight into the bathroom. Every evening I hear the water rushing and then I go to the kitchen and take care of preparing our dinner. I don't have to give up meat, just keep certain things in mind. But that's not a problem and I'm quite happy to do it.

Every evening, after a soothing shower, Alec comes into the kitchen and nestles close to my back. Every evening he looks over my shoulder and hums pleasantly at the wonderful smell of fresh vegetables and herbs from all over the world. The vibration of his deep bass hits my body and sends a shiver down my spine every time. The first few times I felt like my heart stopped, so surprised was I at his appearance and my physical reaction.

It has somehow become our thing. Alec suddenly and unexpectedly appears behind me, murmurs words in my ear or just says nothing and I just feel his warm breath on my neck. And every night we eat together and talk about our day. Well, actually, Alec talks. I listen. My days are always the same. They're monotonous, constant. But for me it's important to live like this. I'm a free spirit and slightly chaotic as you can easily see from my office. The piles of books are getting bigger and bigger and long ago hills have become mountains.

After dinner together, I go to my office and work for a while or do paperwork. Tax returns, for example. Tedious, but necessary. Alec reads or talks to his siblings on the phone. Does the dishes and takes care of his dirty work clothes. Somehow, and I don't know exactly when, he started doing my laundry too. Each time I thank him and at the same time say that he is not my maid and therefore not responsible for my laundry. After a little mischievous smile and a wink, Alec just carries on and again the next day the formerly dirty laundry lies folded and fragrant in my wardrobe.

Every evening. For a fortnight. Except for last night. Alec came home late. He was already showered and changed, didn't greet me with his 'Hello Magnus' and the fine smile around the corners of his mouth. Instead, he came home dog-tired and fell belly-down on the sofa without a word of greeting. Soon I heard a soft snore and the fact that I was sitting on the sofa right next to him with the little reading lamp and a new book in my hand didn't seem to bother Alec at all. Puzzled, I watched him for a while and stroked his hair tenderly. Immersed in my reading again, I forgot everything else and concentrated only on my fingers in Alec's hair and the lost memories of Glenn.

At some point Alec stirred beside me and jumped up from the sofa in a panic. Sleepy and confused, he wiped his hands over his face and ruffled his hair when he saw me sitting on the sofa watching him closely. I switched off the light and got up from the sofa. Without saying a word, I reached for Alec's hand and he immediately intertwined our fingers. Continuing in silence, we walked up the stairs, the defective step creaking, and a little later we were standing in my bedroom.

"What are you up to Magnus?", asked Alec in a voice still rough from sleep.

"Sleeping", I replied, taking off my clothes and getting into bed. Alec understood and removed his clothes. A freshly covered pillow is always ready and the blanket is big enough for three. The night was quiet. Alec fell asleep instantly and I listened to his quiet breathing for quite a while. The warmth of his body close to mine was like a protective blanket. My eyelids grew heavy and I slept peacefully, free from confusing dreams and bad thoughts.

Alec was still asleep when I woke up this morning. The first rays of the day's sun tickled the tip of my nose and I opened my eyes, grumbling. It was clearly too early and too bright and I tried to figure out why that was. In vain. My heart skipped a beat as I turned my head and saw black hair lying wildly in disarray. The image of Las Vegas slipped unbidden into my mind and I remembered that morning full of questions and headaches, a visibly irritated Alec and me leaving the hotel room and my husband in a panic.

And now I sit at the dining table with my steaming cup of coffee in my hands, not understanding the world anymore. I watched Alec running through the house like a startled animal. He rumbled loudly down the stairs as I was reading the local section of the newspaper. Cursing words left his mouth, I never thought he was capable of such language. He disappeared into the bathroom, the door slammed loudly and I spilled some of the coffee I was bringing to my lips in shock. Now I cursed and the sound of the water calmed my mind and the question of why Alec was so upset.

A little later, earlier than his every evening shower ritual, the door opened swingingly and a dripping wet naked Alec rushed out of the bathroom. Naked. Alec was naked. I stared at him and watched intently as a drop of water beaded from the ends of my hair, ran down my forehead and cheek, dripped onto my chest and flowed its way down Alec's body towards my groin. I only registered that Alec was talking to me when a hand came into my field of vision. My eyes were caught by the sight of his magnificent cock and I had clear images before my eyes. A whole movie was playing in my head and the sequel was already in order.

"Magnus", Alec's excited loud voice and wagging hand brought me back to reality. And in that reality, Alec asked for a cup of coffee and told me he was late. For what, he did not tell me. Because he was already on his way to the bedroom and came rumbling down the stairs again a little later. In a dark blue dinner jacket with black lapels, black shoes under his arm and a tie in his hand. He deftly slipped into his shoes and after slender fingers tied the laces in no time at all, they turned their attention to tying the tie.

A sip of coffee, black and dark as night, fully aromatic and wonderfully fragrant flowed hotly down his throat. He slightly screwed up his face but still could not do without another sip. "It's really strong," he said and turned his attention back to the tie that still hung loosely around his neck. Rarely have I seen a man who can tie a knot at such speed as Alec. And what a knot it was. He didn't opt for a double Windsor as usual. No. Alec Lightwood tied a jewelled knot. More specifically, a Trinity knot and my mouth dropped open in surprise. His slender fingers deftly ran over the silky fabric of the deep blue tie and tied a perfect knot.

"I'm so late." One last big gulp from the cup and then it happened. Alec came around the table to me, placed his lips on mine and kissed me gently. Completely out of it, my body reacted, but my mind was not so quick to catch up. Alec kissed me, I returned mechanically, Alec stroked his fingers lovingly through my hair and detached himself from me only a few millimetres. His soft lips moved gossamer softly against mine, everything tingled and the synapses in my head ran at full speed. What was going on here?

"I really have to go. See you later baby." And as quickly as Alec came around the table and kissed my lips, just as quickly he broke away from me, grabbed his phone and disappeared towards the door. Abruptly he stopped and hesitantly turned his head. I was in no position to say anything at all. And neither, apparently, was Alec any more. We stared at each other and both had lots of question marks hovering over our heads. Why did he do it? So I've been sitting here for a while now, replaying the moments. The film plays and each time I discover a new detail. But they don't bring me any closer to the question of 'why'.

Alec said goodbye to me like a friend. But not like the kind of friend you go to the nearest bar or club to celebrate with for a beer. He said goodbye to me like a partner. Like a steady partner, or in our case, like a husband. A ringing bell snaps me out of the ever-spinning carousel of thoughts.

"Raphael. What can I do for you?", I ask, seeing his name glowing in big green flashing letters on the black display.

"Hello my friend. I just wanted to wish you a good time at the wedding. And to remind you about the meeting tomorrow. Hopefully for you without the grumpy head and morning sickness." What? Wedding? What wedding? What is he talking about?

"I don't know what you're talking about", I reply, confused.

"The wedding? Alec's sister's? It's today. And she invited you", I hear Raphael say and curse myself right now.