《LGBTQIAP+ Milestones: Book 2》Coming Out, It's Scary for most
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Okay to get this straight I'm young.... but I also realised my LGBTQ+ Tendencies of liking other females a few years ago. I never had a good childhood, being bullied all day, every day. In my own mother's words, "Being Treated like a Leper." This has made me incredibly anxious and shy, so maybe that was why it was so hard to come to the conclusion that I was Lesbian, It might have been the fact that my father left us at a young age. Perhaps even the fact that my grandmother is a Jehova's witness, I've even recently been right in front of her as she told my younger brother that it was wrong, Of course, she doesn't know... well to my knowledge she doesn't.
I tried on many occasions to come out but I always imagined the worst things happening, e.g. I would be in the car with my mother and I would imagine her being so shocked or upset that she'd crash the car. It was really hard and well it still is, To my current knowledge, only two people in my life know because I've directly told them.
I first came out last year, Well just over a year ago. It was my best friend, Over wattpad in fact. I can remember the event clearly, I typed in something along the lines of ' I need to tell you something really important, don't judge me... or hate me.' I waited for her reply. 'Of course , What is it?" I can remember my body becoming incredibly shaky and my breathing becoming short and unsteady as I slowly typed the words ' I'm a Lesbian.' It took a few minutes before she responded, perhaps it was the internet that day, perhaps she was in shock but the words I read made me so happy that I started crying, she had accepted me for who I was and am.
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Even now I remember coming out to the second person, my mother. It was early this year and I told my friend, as a backup in case everything went wrong, I wrote the words on a piece of paper, folded it tightly and walked down the stairs of my old home, I placed it in front of my mother who was laying on her stomach and doing something on her phone, She grabbed the paper and I ran upstairs. I cried and walked down an hour or two later and asked if she's opened the paper, She said 'No' and I was heart broken, telling her to open it before going up to my room, half an hour later she came up to my room and told me that it was okay. That would have to be one of the happiest moments of my life so far.
Now to anyone else suffering like I was and still am as I hear homophobic remarks every now and then, just remember that if your family truly loves you and you strongly believe that they do, that they will still love you very much, possibly even more despite religions and beliefs. But if you aren't too sure just make sure to have somewhere to go as many LGBTQ+ Youth are homeless and I wouldn't wish homelessness upon anyone who has bullied me or caused me harm, mentally or physically,
Goodbye and good luck to anyone coming out^~^
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