By

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When I was little, I always thought I was straight. I never really thought about girls, but guys were always on my mind. Who would be my next boyfriend, who I have a crush on, who might like me back, things like that.

I haven't really known what REAL love was until the beginning of 2016. I met this guy, and at first, we were just friends, but we passed notes in math and played little games and we eventually fell for each other.

But even before that, I started thinking to myself. What if I dated girls? And I realized, that I would have absolutely no problem dating girls, and would like to date them. So for two years, I identified as bisexual.

Recently though, I have been questioning myself. Am I really Bi? I've had crushes on guys before, but I've never had a crush on a girl before. I don't get the same feelings I do with the thought of dating guys, than with a thought of dating girls.

The word straight doesn't really feel right to me, it does t fit. That's not who I am. But lesbian is a little closer, but I'm still not sure. I wouldn't mind being lesbian, but that doesn't make me lesbian. So does that mean that not minding being Bisexual is not actually being Bisexual? I haven't kissed or felt any crush-like feelings for a girl ever, but I know I'm not straight. Although, I find myself WANTING to kiss some girls, so maybe that counts? But I'm still not sure.

I just wish I could date or kiss a girl and then truly know who I am. But until I can have that experience (which I am looking forward to) I will still identify as Bisexual.