By

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Gather around friends and listen to something that I did that I very much regret.

This was a mistake. A big one for me.

So I had this "best friend" that treated me like crap. She always hurt me physically and mentally. Her name was Kylie. I had a crush on her. My FIRST crush on the same sex...

A little beforehand info, I had asked my other friend what she thought if I had a crush on her "jokingly" and she said "ew that would be gross" and she laughed. I fake laughed and felt like shriveling up inside.

So back to Kylie.

So I was spending the night at her house. At this time I thought I was bi, and my whole journey with my sexuality is very complicated and on going, and I trusted this person. I thought she wouldn't tell anyone. So we were playing truth or dare and it was my turn to dare her and the whole night I wanted to dare her to kiss me but I was too scared. I finally got up the courage and said it and she was like "oh ok sure" so we pecked and I was all scrunched up and super scared so it was horrible but it sparked something in me and I knew that I liked the same sex FOR SURE.

So we kissed and when it was over she, first said, oh so your a pecker so you don't kiss good, second she said, you know you can kiss me anytime you want. This had me skeptical and excited all at the same time. (I'm only just now realizing how much I liked her while writing this) so then a second later I started crying and I told her I was bi. She was like oh ok well God won't hate you since you only half sin. That really hurt me. Like ALOT. I just brushed it off tho.

The Monday at school, in the last period, this girl that sat behind me she said "Hey, are you a lesbian?" I scoffed and had an inner panic attack and said "no of course not. Why would you think that?" She said "Kylie said so." I just said oh but I died inside. This person I trusted so much to be the very first person I told turned their back on me and told this person at school. I felt so betrayed. It hurt so much.

Later on the bus I confronted her about it and she said someone else told the girl and I skeptically believed her only because I was dumb back then.

The lesson to this story children, make sure you know the person you tell something to. Make sure they'll keep the secret. Make sure you can TRUST them. Don't make my mistake.