By

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About six months ago, I found that the person I am not exactly straight. As a matter of fact, I currently identify as pansexual.

Here's the problem: I live in what my mum likes to call a "Bible Belt". It's basically an area where everyone is a hardcore Christian. Now, I myself am a Methodist, so please don't be offended, but this means that most people in my area are extreme homophobes.

The homophobia is so bad that one year of my middle school year, one kid never spoke to me because he assumed that I was a lesbian. ASSUMED.

So, this made it hard to tell anyone. Luckily, my friends and Mum supported me through it all.

But then there's my dad.

I rarely get to see/talk to him, since my parents are divorced. Currently, though, I'm spending six weeks of the summer with him and my brother. This meant that I'd be with him when the one year anniversary of the legalization of gay marriage came around.

I'd always been scared to tell my dad of my non-straightness (just like I was scared to tell my friends, Mum, brother, and boyfriend), but this was different. I didn't know if he supported the community, hated it, or anything.

This was why I was determined to tell him on the 26th of June (the day I wrote this).

I was sitting on my air mattress, looking over my "project" (eight pieces of paper telling the reader that I was pansexual) and listening to music, when 6:26pm came. It was my time.

My stomach tested and turned, forming swirls Id never felt before. I felt like throwing up. I walked to where my father was and handed in my work. "I'll be outside of you need me", I said, knowing that I didn't want to be there while he was reading the pages. I quickly grabbed my phone and earbuds and left the house to sit on the curb.

This was when it started to sink in that this wasn't a dream: that I had actually done it. I couldn't help but tear up. I was scared. Would Dad yell at me? Question me? Stop caring? I didn't know. I decided to call Amelia, a friend of mine who shares so many of my characteristics that people call us sisters. I told her what was going on and, as tears of guilt fell from my face, she told me this:

"There are some steps I want you to follow: Step one, stand up and get off of the curb. Step two, March proudly to the door. Step three, open the door. Step four, close the door. Step five, pace around the house or room and then sit down on a couch or chair."

And so I did. I started to feel better when she decided to add two more optional steps.

"Now, quietly go up the stairs and find your dad. Then, sit in a chair in the room he's in." I was hesitant, but I knew that I needed to do that. On my way up the stairs, however, I was spotted.

"Ari, I don't care who you date, as long as both of you are happy, healthy, and non-abusive" would basically be a summary statement of the conversation we had.

I know that this is a lucky break, but always, ALWAYS trust your gut. When it says it's time come out, then it's time to come out.

I'm sorry if this story seemed all over the place. I'm not exactly the best with words sometimes.

Also, I'd like to give a shoutout to Amelia, Corrie, and Alexis. Thank you guys for being some of the first people to know and support me. I don't know where I'd be if it weren't for you guys. Thank you.