By

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When I was about 12 I read a book called Tomboy by Liz Prince. Immediately I started questioning my gender. Even though in the book she does not turn out to be transgender I knew I did not want to be a girl anymore. Growing up in a body church where girls wore long skirts and boys wore suits. I wore skirts 24/7 up until I was 9. We were never allowed to wear jeans. I never knew I had a choice to have a different gender considering my family is trans and homophobic and once I found out I had choices I immediately got into the LGBTQ+ community. I already knew I liked girls and boys, so I thought I was supposed to be a boy and that's why I liked girls so much. Further into digging into different genders I slapped a label on myself. "Genderfluid" I think I only used that label for the fact that I still wear skirts every Sunday for the church my Mother forces me to go to. Eventually I got depression and had gotten to the point where I had carried a razor blade every where I went. I am 3 months clean of cutting today. Even though the depression is creeping back in I hope to get help for that real soon. Now I believe I am Transgender. I wear guys clothes I act like a guy and I am pansexual. Even though my parents and my siblings hate me for being trans, I have internet friends who believe in me and love me very much. I think if it wasn't for my internet friends I don't know if I would be alive and writing this story right now. I got a pretty much gender neutral haircut yesterday and I'm reallly happy with it. And I'm getting really close to accepting myself.

Thank you for reading my story. I hope you enjoyed a sliver of my transchildhood. 💙💚💛💜