《Three Months》Apologies
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The next morning Dimentio woke just before the sun rose. He was anxious, so his body naturally woke up early, which he was grateful for.
However, it wasn't all good. His body hurt really bad and he felt incredibly ill. It was hard for him even to lift his head. He felt like he needed to throw up, but there was nothing in his stomach for him to eject.
A part of him really wanted to just stay in bed and go back to sleep. He felt like he really needed to rest. Getting up would only make everything hurt more than necessary.
However, the other voice in his head was louder. The voice that told him he was going to be in pain no matter what happened and just to try to make the most of this last day.
His skin was colder than usual. It felt clammy. Yes, it was still grey, but there was almost a blue quality to it now. As soon as he sat up, he almost felt the weight of a hundred hands trying to push him back down. Trying to push him down into the Underwhere once again so they could drag him away. But he couldn't let them. Not yet. It took every ounce of strength he had to stay sitting up.
He needed to get out of that bed. It was too soft and warm, too tempting. He needed to get as far away from it as possible. However, he couldn't find the strength to walk anymore. He could barely move his legs. They felt heavy. Everything felt heavy. His lungs and veins felt hot, his stomach felt like it was burning from the inside out, and his head throbbed.
He ended up rolling off the bed and falling onto the floor with a thud. The impact was much more painful and shocking than he expected it to be, sending what felt like a painful wave of electricity up and all the way through his body. Dimentio whimpered softly to himself, squeezing his eyes shut. He was half-convinced that the impact of that small fall alone would kill him at that point, but he couldn't allow that. He couldn't die yet. He still needed to make the most of this day, then leave so Luigi would never find out.
He had a plan now. Spend the day with Luigi, bid him farewell, then go to the cemetery and find his grave. He wasn't sure what the toad working there would say, but it didn't matter. As soon as he died they'd surely figure something out.
He tried finding the strength to get back up, but he needed a minute to recover. He lay in his back and looked up at the ceiling. It was hard to focus on anything, it was almost like he lost his peripheral vision. All he could see was the ceiling, and all he could hear were muffled sounds. His brain was too lazy to try to connect what they meant, but listening to them was soothing.
"Dim...io?" Something said. For some reason, he didn't register the voice. His first thought was, huh. The walls are talking to me. How kind of them.
"Dimentio?" They said again. He didn't reply out loud since it would take too much energy, so he instead replied in his head, thinking that maybe they could hear.
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Hi, he thought to them. Don't worry, I'll get up. Just give me a minute.
"Dimentio!" They exclaimed, sounding slightly clearer and louder. Dimentio blinked slowly, then shifted his gaze to the side to see Luigi leaning over him, looking worried.
Oh, hello! Dimentio thought, not remembering that Luigi couldn't actually hear his thoughts.
"Dimentio?! Are you okay?!" He asked, softly grasping Dimentio's shoulder. Luigi's grip was soft, but it still hurt. However, Dimentio didn't want to tell him that.
Yes, I'm fine, Dimentio thought before lightly smiling to himself, remembering that he wasn't talking out loud. He took a short slightly uneven breath, gathering all his strength so he could attempt to keep his voice steady. "Hi," is all he managed to say.
His voice was slightly softer and more hoarse than usual. Speaking had hurt much more than he expected it to. Simply talking took so much energy now. He missed when everything was easy.
"What happened?! Did you fall?" Luigi asked, his eyebrows knitted together in a worrisome expression.
Dimentio simply nodded to save himself the energy from speaking, however nodding ended up taking just as much energy.
"Yeah," he breathed. "I fell. Feel tired."
"Well, then maybe go to sleep. Here, I'll help you back up to your bed–"
"No!" Dimentio exclaimed, tensing up slightly, which caused all his muscles to burn. It felt like he was being attacked by fire ants under his skin. He desperately wished for the feeling to cease. It did die down after he relaxed, but he still could feel it.
"Not going to sleep," he said, trying to cut out all unnecessary words and save energy for his own sake.
"Why? Dimentio, you look exhausted," Luigi pointed out. "You've been getting more and more tired lately. What's going on with you?"
"Nothing," Dimentio lied. "Just... want to do stuff before I go. Please."
Luigi frowned at him for a moment, then let out a sigh. He supposed he could understand where Dimentio was coming from, but still wanted to know why he was so sick all of a sudden. He had been getting progressively worse. Was it anxiety about leaving?
Or something else?
"Okay... well what do you want to do?" Luigi asked.
"Everything."
"Everything?" Luigi repeated, with a small smile and chuckle. "Dimentio, we can't do everything."
"Why not?"
"There isn't enough time," Luigi explained. "It's impossible."
"Oh yeah? Watch us."
Luigi lightly smiled at this, looking out the window for a moment.
It was still dark outside. The sun had yet to fully rise. Dimentio didn't want to think about how the sun was about to rise for the last time during his lifetime.
"Well," Luigi finally said after a moment of consideration. "Then we better get started."
Luigi helped carry Dimentio down the stairs by giving him a piggyback ride since it was clear Dimentio was too exhausted to walk. The man in green wondered if he got any sleep at all these past few nights, but knew that thinking about it wouldn't get him anywhere. Dimentio was clearly hiding something, but trying to force him to speak would still be pointless.
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"Need breakfast?" Luigi asked, briefly looking at the kitchen once he got down the stairs. Dimentio simply shook his head no, leaning his head on Luigi's shoulder so the man in green could feel it. Luigi nodded, then walked over and grabbed a muffin for himself. "Well, let me know if you change your mind. I can get you something from town."
Dimentio nodded as Luigi took a bite out of the muffin, heading for the door when Dimentio suddenly gasped as if remembering something, which made Luigi basically halt in his tracks. "What, what is it?" Luigi asked.
"Mario," Dimentio quietly answered, remembering how he told himself he'd apologize to the man in red before he left. It seemed a waste of time, but for some strange reason, he didn't want to leave without saying sorry, because he really was sorry now. He wanted Mario to know.
"Mario?" Luigi asked, lightly laughing to himself. "Mario's asleep. He'll probably be asleep for another three hours."
"Wake him up."
"What?" Luigi asked.
"Wake him up," Dimentio repeated. "...Please?"
Luigi softly muttered a 'whoa' under his breath, slightly shocked over the fact that Dimentio would pull out the 'please' card for something like this. However, since Dimentio saying please was such a rare occurrence, (even though it was noticeably happening more and more often,) he agreed, backtracking to Mario's bedroom and softly knocking on the door.
They were met with the sound of exhausted groaning on the other side of the door, and the slow shuffling of steps. A moment later there was a soft thump on the door as Mario rested his forehead on the other side.
"Whatcha want?" He asked in a low, tired voice.
"Dimentio wants you," Luigi replied.
"Really? Well, can he want me in about three hours? What time is it?"
"Nope," Dimentio added in. "This has to be now. Don't worry, it'll be quick."
Mario waited for a moment, yawning to himself, then stepping back to open the door, blinking tiredly at Luigi and Dimentio.
"You look just as tired as me," the man in red pointed out, looking at Dimentio and raising an eyebrow.
"I know," Dimentio replied, lightly kicking his legs as if silently signaling for Luigi to put him down. Luigi obeyed and did so, grabbing Dimentio's shoulder so he wouldn't fall over, which Dimentio was silently grateful for.
Dimentio lightly patted Luigi's hand, looking up at the man in green and silently telling him to let go. Luigi seemed to hesitate for a moment, but did so, allowing Dimentio to shakily walk into Mario's room, using the wall as a support. "Luigi, could you go? I'll be right behind you, I promise."
The man in green stilled slightly, wanting to ask why. Wanting to stay and know why Dimentio felt the need to talk to his older brother. But he didn't ask because he knew that Dimentio wouldn't give him the full answers he wanted, so he left, heading back downstairs and eating the rest of his muffin for breakfast, grabbing and wrapping another one to take with him in case Dimentio got hungry later.
Meanwhile, Mario waited silently for Dimentio to say something while Dimentio tried catching his breath and keeping his weight over his feet so he wouldn't fall. "What is it?" Mario asked, looking down as he always did.
"I'm sorry," Dimentio said quickly, trying to get to the point so he wouldn't waste any more time than necessary, although truth to be told, none of this felt like wasted time anymore.
Mario's eyes widened ever so slightly, though he was still looking down at the floor. He shifted his gaze to the side, looking over at his own bed now. "What?" He asked.
"I'm sorry," Dimentio repeated. "For all the pain I've caused you. I didn't realize how wrong I was before, but I realize it now. I shouldn't have tried taking all this away. I shouldn't have used your brother that way. I shouldn't have done any of it. I'm sorry. There's nothing I could say to truly justify my actions, all I can offer are my apologies. I suppose... I just wanted to say that before I left."
As soon as Dimentio said the words, 'before I left,' Mario looked up at him, finally looking him in the eyes. Every other part of that phrase Dimentio just spoke didn't truly matter, because Mario already knew that Dimentio was sorry. He already knew that Dimentio regretted his past actions and grew from it. He didn't need a verbal confirmation, though it was rather nice to hear.
What really mattered about that statement was the reminder that Dimentio was going away.
"You're still leaving?" Mario asked.
The fact that this was the question Mario asked threw Dimentio off slightly. He expected to hear Mario be shocked over the fact that he was actually apologizing, or maybe to demand the reasoning behind doing what he did back then, however, this question was easier to respond to, so he was slightly grateful.
"Yes." He simply replied.
"Oh," Mario said, looking down once again as he always did. "...Why?"
He, like Luigi, knew that there was no point in asking why, but he also had a little hope that maybe Dimentio would tell him. After all, Dimentio had changed, so maybe he had grown to be more open.
"I just have to," Dimentio replied, leading to Mario letting out a disappointed sigh, not that he expected any other answer. At least this answer gave more context than just the word, 'because.'
"Well..." Mario started, swallowing as he spoke and looking up at Dimentio, trying to remain strong and keep eye contact. He truly wasn't afraid of making eye contact with Dimentio anymore and he hadn't been for a while, but it always felt awkward and he always still did feel tension there, likely because of himself. He was a very tense person, after all, (probably due to all the adventure surrounding his life. It was hard to be completely easygoing when he had to journey to rescue someone or something so often.) "We'll miss you. I'll miss you."
Dimentio stilled slightly, looking back at Mario, then softly smiling even though it took so much energy.
"I'll miss you too."
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