Clara wasn't hard to find, and I shook my head at my own thought of thinking she would be.

Clara was never hard to find, Clara was always front and center. I'm not sure if it's because she deposits herself there, searching for the spotlight, or simply because the spotlight follows her. She's one of those girls, the ones you can't take your eyes off. Like a sunset or a car crash, you just can't help but stare.

Which is what the majority of the party goers were currently doing, staring at Clara while she moved to the music. She was in the backyard, well it was more of a courtyard than a backyard. The large pool was the main feature, and it was surrounded by perfectly designed and placed concrete. Clara was standing on a half-wall made of said concrete, she was wearing only a white bikini. She had her arms in the air, a red plastic cup in one of them. She was poorly mouthing the lyrics to the song that was blasting through the speakers that were hidden in the ground. She had a smile on her face though, and it was enough to make me smile back at her.

She didn't notice me, even though I was right in front of her, her eyes were closed as she was swaying to the beat.

"Clara," I said loudly, attempting to raise the sound of my voice over the music. When her eyes remained closed, I placed my hand on her thigh instead, "earth to Clara!"

Her eyes shot open, and she tried to focus them on me. It took her a second, but then she realized it was me.

"Bitch!" She yelled, spreading her arms open before launching on me. Luckily, I was still sober so my reflexes weren't slow, because if I didn't quickly catch her, she would have ended up on the ground. "Where the fuck have you been? I've been waiting here for you forever," Clara slurred the last word, making it last way longer than it was supposed to.

"I just got here," I told her, holding her weight until her legs straightened beneath her. "Who did you come here with?" I asked her, even though I already knew the answer.

"Him," Clara grimaced as she said the word, not so subtly pointing her finger towards Brett. I looked in his direction, slapping Clara's outstretched hand away in the process, before he noticed she was pointing at him.

I wasn't surprised to find Brett standing next to Jesse. They were surrounded by their football friends, a bottle of beer in both of their hands. I shook my head as I watched the way they were laughing, holding each other's shoulders as they bent over in hysterics. They didn't look like the type of people who had killed someone. Indirectly, or not. They didn't look like the kind of people who had giant skeletons in their closet. They didn't look like people who were actively blackmailing their ex-girlfriends into being with them.

"Fuck them," Clara slurred from beside me. I turned back to look at her, noticing the way her body was still swaying even though she was no longer moving. She was hammered.

"Fuck. Them." Clara repeated, raising her hand again, but this time only her middle finger was raised, strecthed out in their direction. I hastily pushed her arm down again, though this time my own laugh came to my lips.

"Fuck them," I agreed, trying to quiet my laughter.

"Let's get drunk," Clara giggled, seeing my reaction, "they can clean up the mess we make."

"Clara, darling, you're already drunk," I broke the news to her, moving the hair out of her face.

"Right," Clara giggled again, "but you're not, and there's a table full of free booze just feet away."

"Well, how can I resist that offer?" I joked, feeling the heaviness that had been settled in my chest begin to decrease. This is why my friendship with Clara was something I held so dearly to me. Hell, it might be the only relationship I hold dear, besides the one with my mom. She had this way of making me light again, and maybe it was simply because she was sharing some of her lightness with me.

If I was a dark blue colour, and Clara was yellow, when she was with me I became green. And hey, it might not be as bright as her yellow, but at least it was alive.

Clara kept her hand on my arm as she dragged me towards the long table cluttered with bottles of alcohol. She filled her own cup first, while I reached out to grab a cup for myself. Clara caught my arm, however, shaking her head at me. I instantly rolled my eyes, knowing exactly what she was about to do. I knew there was no way out of it, so I bit back my words of protest and leaned my head backwards, my mouth open.

"All the way back," Clara instructed me, causing me to playfully stick my tongue out at her. Nevertheless, I listened, tilting my head back even further.

Clara laughed out as she poured a steady stream of what tasted like tequila into my open mouth, and she didn't stop after what could be considered a single shot. I closed my eyes in disgust, but even though my mouth was wide open, the edges of my lips still shot upwards. Clara still didn't stop, though now the alcohol was beginning to messily dribble out of my mouth. I heard footsteps close to us, as people started to gather and watch the show. The way Clara wanted them to, I'm sure.

"Drink, drink, drink, drink," people chanted out, causing Clara to squeal in delight. Finally, when I feared my own death was about to be caused by drowning a la Tequila, I pushed my head upright, causing Clara to boo in my face.

"It's like you want me to get alcohol poisoning," I muttered out to Clara, who had turned her disappointment into a dazzling, yet messy smile.

"That's the goal," she winked at me before raking her eyes up and down my body. "New dress? I hate it."

"I do, too," I chuckled out, thoroughly amused by her bluntness. "Jesse bought it for me."

"Oh, gross," Clara's smile turned into a look of disgust, "Brett bought me one too. I threw it in the pool," she gestured to said pool with her head, and I followed the direction. Sure enough, there was a black scrap of fabric floating on the top of the perfectly crisp blue pool water.

I started to laugh, until Jesse and Brett walked into my line of sight. They were on their way to us, likely drawn by the chants for me to drink. The laugh that was about the leave my throat was now pushed down, back into my lungs.

"Great," I muttered, turning back to Clara. I'm guessing she noticed the them too, but instead of turning away like I had, she was just glaring at them, raising her cup to her lips and allowing the liquid to pass through them freely.

"Girls," Jesse greeted us first, his hand finding it's way to my waist again. There was no more flinching, no more subtle movements to get his hand off me. This was how it was, this was how it was going to be. I might as well get used to it. "Enough tequila, Lilly?"

"Maybe," I answered swiftly, eyeing the bottle that was now back on the table in front of us. "I might have some more."

To my surprise, Jesse's lips broke out in a smile, "there's the Lilly we've all been looking for. Where have you been hiding, babe?"

"She's been here, maybe you just haven't been able to see it," Clara answered, instead of me. Her voice was no longer happy and free, she sounded angry now. Brett was standing beside her, and I noticed that he wasn't trying to touch her, to claim her like he had been doing lately. He was simply staring at her, a look of desperation in his eyes.

There was an awkward silence, Jesse and Clara both staring at each other. Jesse head was titled, like he was running her words through his head. Clara, well she was just looking at him like she wanted to slap him.

"Well, here we go, ladies and gentleman," a voice interrupted us all. Clara's response to the voice was instantaneous, the way she began to smile but then dropped it immediately, her face turning blank. She moved just an inch, beginning to turn around to search for the voice before stopping.

I didn't move at all, however, because I knew one thing, one thing I desperately didn't want to be true. Where there's Samuel...

"The entertainment has finally arrived," Roman's deep voice crept into the air. "The quarterback who can barely throw a football and the linebacker who can barely tackle."

Samuel and Roman walked up to us, and although they had smiles on their faces, like they were saying nothing but jokes, the looks in their eyes said otherwise.

"Who's up for a drinking game?" Samuel purred out, his eyes dragging up and down Clara's body, before smiling at Brett.

"Lilac is great at games, isn't that right, Lilac?" Roman asked, simultaneously causing my heart to float and sink at the same time.