《All About Evangeline》Chapter 25
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"He doesn't love me," Evie told Grace and Charlotte as they showed her into her bedchamber. "All this time, all these years, while I watched my mother charm one man after another into marrying her, I thought I would gladly marry anyone, under any circumstances, just so I could be married before she was—again." She slumped onto the edge of the bed, staring straight ahead without really seeing anything, partly because her vision was blurred with the threat of tears. "Now I realize I don't want to marry—I can't marry—unless it's for the same reason you two did."
A moment of stunned, contemplative silence followed before Charlotte said, tentatively, "You didn't have this epiphany just now, did you? I mean, because you learned that Grace and I married for love?"
Evie shook her head. "I think it was my brother's recent marriage. When Tabitha came to stay with us, she'd been hit over the head during a confrontation with highwaymen, and when my brother found her lying at the roadside, he assumed she was the princess we were expecting. She did not say anything to the contrary, and he courted her thinking he could restore our family's tarnished reputation by marrying a princess."
"But she wasn't a princess," Grace pointed out.
"Yet by the time he discovered the truth, he was already in love with her," Evie replied. "And he married her anyway. Perhaps that's when I realized I wanted the same thing, but I didn't believe I had a chance of knowing the same sort of happiness—especially after what happened when Lady Flora took me to Madame Delphine's Cyprian ball." She went on to tell Grace and Charlotte that particular story, fully expecting them to be shocked and outraged.
Instead, they both looked quite impressed.
Evie glanced from one to the other. "Neither of you are scandalized?" She settled her gaze on Grace. "You won't have me cast out of here?"
Smiling, Grace tilted her head to one side. "Let she who is without sin..."
Charlotte lifted both hands, palms facing outward. "Not I."
Evie daubed her eyes with her handkerchief. "And here's the odd thing. I don't begrudge him being there that night."
"Well, why would you, when you were there, too?" Grace asked.
"He didn't even look as if he really wanted to be there," Evie went on. "Indeed, he looked rather disgusted by all the goings-on. As was I—to some extent. A part of me was also fascinated to see what really goes on between men and women after all is said and done. Or at least said."
"So how did the two of you...well...come together?" Charlotte inquired.
Evie took a deep breath. "I was wearing a mask, you understand. It made me less inhibited, and therefore, more inclined to do things I would never have dreamed of doing without it. And—" She abruptly paused as Grace held up a single hand as if to silence her.
"'Tis really none of our affair, Evie, for all that we're ready to burst with curiosity. But truly, you're telling us things you should be saying to him. Does he know yet why you were there?"
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"I told him that Lady Flora tricked me. I thought she was taking me to Lady Whitbourne's masquerade ball. You know she has one every spring and fall."
Charlotte smiled wryly. "One wonders who tricked Lord Gareth into going to Madame Delphine's?"
"I think he was there to meet someone," Evie surmised. "Either they didn't show up, or the meeting didn't go well. I don't know. I can't very well ask him."
"Why not? Maybe he was tricked, Evie, just like you," said Grace. "You two need to talk more. That's what kept me and Hugh apart for so many years. A deplorable lack of honest communication."
"Our father thought to arrange our marriages for us," Charlotte put in. "Gracie and I both had to fight for the men we loved. You must do the same, Evie."
"How? I can't make him love me. Letting him compromise me won't do the trick if it didn't the first time. If we continue our journey north tomorrow, what will change? I'll still be trapped in that carriage with Lady Cranston, while he rides his mount alongside in the open air."
Now Grace lifted a single index finger, leaning toward Evie. "I do believe you just unwittingly provided the solution to your own dilemma. You said if you continue your journey on the morrow..."
"I'm afraid we will. Lady Cranston is adamant about returning to her home in Yorkshire."
"Then let her go. You, in the meantime, will remain here as our guest. We'd love to have you stay more than one night. 'Twill be bad enough that Charlotte and Ethan must leave for the Continent."
Evie creased her brow in bewilderment. "But...but what about Lady Cranston?"
"That's the wonderful thing about being a widow, or so I've heard, and not to say I'm eager to become one anytime soon," said Grace. "But she doesn't require a chaperone. You do."
"Then Gareth will leave here on the morrow with Lady Cranston...but without me?"
"Unless he has no wish to leave you behind."
"Lady Cranston may have no wish to leave me behind. She wants to take me on as her paid companion, to replace Tabitha, now that she's married my brother."
"Evie, you don't really want to be her companion, do you?" Charlotte sounded as if she already knew the answer to that.
"Not particularly. I haven't agreed."
"Well, there you go," said Grace. "Tell her—and him—that you've decided not to continue your northward journey. Tell them you shall remain at AshdownPark until your brother and his bride stop here on their way back to Tyndall Abbey."
"Indeed, our own parents would say that's the proper course of action for you to take, in any event," Charlotte chimed in. "Neither Lord Gareth nor Lady Cranston can make you go with them because you've decided to wait for your brother. Who can argue with that?"
"That's just it," said Evie. "They can't argue with it. He certainly can't. They'll both leave me here, and where will that...well...leave me?"
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Charlotte glanced at her sister. "She has a point, you know. You gave me similar advice concerning Ethan, and you remember what happened."
"The advice would have worked, Charlotte, had it not been for that forged express sent to him by Lady Ruth Hale. And in the end, you did marry him. Who shall interfere this time?" Grace glanced back at Evie. "Announce at dinner this evening that you'd like to remain here until your brother comes."
So Evie did.
Grace's husband Hugh, Lord Ashdown, inadvertently started the ball rolling for her that evening as he sat at the head of the long table in his elegant dining room and said to Gareth, "So you'll be continuing north on the morrow? Are you sure we can't persuade you to stay a few days, especially since you've abandoned your pursuit of Bradbury and Lady Milner?"
"I gave my word that I would see the ladies to Cranston Hall," Gareth replied.
"And I am anxious to return there," Lady Cranston added.
Evie lifted her wine goblet. "I, however, would like very much to stay here, my lord, if you'll have me."
"What?" Lady Cranston stiffened with indignation in her chair.
Evie longed to see Gareth's initial reaction, but she knew better. Instead she kept her earnest gaze riveted on Lord Ashdown, who said, "Why, Miss Benedict, we'd love to have you stay with us for as long as you like."
Grace added, "Ethan and my dear sister Charlotte are leaving tomorrow, so I would certainly welcome the company. Oh, do stay, Evie!"
Evie sipped her claret, fighting with every last fiber of her being to avoid glancing Gareth's way. "Perhaps I will stay only until my brother and his bride return this way, en route to our ancestral home in Derbyshire. That shouldn't be more than a week, a fortnight at the most."
"But I mean to return to Yorkshire as soon as possible!" Lady Cranston exclaimed. "If you are to be my companion, Miss Benedict, then I must insist you leave with me tomorrow morning. Otherwise, I shall have to continue my journey home without you." She frantically twisted in her chair to survey Gareth, and only then did Evie enjoy the satisfaction of looking at him, for he was now safely facing Lady Cranston.
Yet to Evie's surprise—and dismay—Gareth was placid and expressionless, as if he had as much to do with any of this as the footman who stood several feet behind him next to the sideboard, staring straight ahead. Come to think of it, the footman was just as placid and expressionless.
And wholly uninterested in the proceedings.
"You needn't fret, my lady," said Gareth. "I will still take you to Cranston Hall if that is your wish."
"But it wouldn't seem right, just you as an outrider."
"Do you not have a maid?" asked Lady Lockwood, who was Grace and Charlotte's mother.
"Oh dear. What a muddle!" Lady Cranston wrung her hands and winced, for she still had some pain in her shoulder where she'd been shot more than a month ago. "No, I do not have a maid with me. Miss Rowan was my companion traveling with me down from Yorkshire. But now she's married Lord Tyndall and I was hoping his sister here would take Miss Rowan's place. Oh, Miss Benedict, will you not please reconsider?"
Guilt jabbed at Evie, and she faltered. She stole a glance at Grace and then Charlotte. Both of them gazed back at her with wide eyes and taut jaws that urged her to stand her ground against the formidable dowager.
Evie set down her goblet. "I've been a paid companion before, my lady. I'm not sure I want to do it again."
"Then pray, what else will you do? If no man will marry you—"
"Isn't that what you told Miss Rowan? And now she's Lady Tyndall. No, I've made up my mind. I shall stay here until Lord and Lady Tyndall arrive. After that...who knows?" With that, she picked up her knife and fork, and resumed cutting her slice of roast beef as if that settled the matter once and for all.
"Lord Gareth, won't you make her see reason?" Lady Cranston pleaded. "Marry her, for pity's sake, then she will have no choice but to come with us, even if it means she won't be my companion, after all."
"But she doesn't want to marry me, my lady." He certainly didn't seem vexed about that. Lady Cranston might have been exhorting him to dance with Evie. But she doesn't want to dance with me, my lady.
"That is entirely beside the point! Do you think I wanted to marry the late Lord Cranston? Did Lady Lockwood here wish to marry Lord Lockwood?" She leaned over, not quite across Gareth, to put a startled Lady Lockwood on the spot. "Admit it, Marcella. You didn't really want to marry him, did you?"
"I was supposed to marry his cousin," Lady Lockwood replied, "but when he died of smallpox, Crispin inherited his title. And me. Alas, my daughters, who both schemed and contrived to marry for love..."
"Schemed," Grace muttered.
"Contrived," Charlotte scoffed.
"...have clearly given Miss Benedict the same idea. But, my dear Naomi, it just so happens that right after my younger daughter and her new husband depart for their ship on the morrow, my husband and I shall be leaving for Yorkshire where we will spend a few days at Bellingham Hall. The Earl and Countess of Bellingham are having a house party."
"Why, they're neighbors!" Lady Cranston exclaimed, clasping her hands in delight.
"We should very much enjoy your company on the journey," Lady Lockwood said.
"What's more, I recall now that Lady Bellingham has an unmarried daughter about the same age as Miss Benedict," Lady Cranston said. "Perhaps she'd like to become my new companion!"
Oh, this was all working out wonderfully for everyone, wasn't it?
Even Gareth. "Well! I suppose I'm now a free man. Should I continue to FramptonCastle to visit my brother and uncle, or do I return to London?"
But not Evie, whose heart sank at the realization that all this time, he'd managed to avoid looking her way even accidentally.
Or even, for that matter, speaking to her.
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