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Secrets & lies - ruelle

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✨Emilia POV

Batting open my lashes, my eyes were blurry until I blinked it away and stared long at the familiar pink curtains attacked to the ceiling.

The fly that buzzed around the room irritated me and that's when I knew it was time to get up. I couldn't deal with the vibrations in my hearing no more.

Groaning, I touch my head but his way and wince when I applied too much pressure but that's when I realised there was fabric clutched around my head like a second skin.

Propping myself up on my elbows, I glance around the empty room and kick back the covers and swing my aching legs over the edge of the bed slowly. Shaking, my legs burn as they stumble over to my dresser for support.

What the fûck happened to me?

Time. I needed time. I look at the clock on my desk to see it's noon time which made sense because I could smell a well cooked meal by Valentina brewing on the stove.

As slow as possible, I hold my head in my left hand and twist the knob to my door and look both left and right like I was crossing a road.

"What are you doing out of bed?" I see a limping Elijah exit his room which was far down the hall.

"I-I-I dunno," I steady myself against wall next to me that had multiple paintings of gruesome imagery. A man being held in the air with a sword plunged deep inside his guts. There was also another man that had been quartered with blood running from his arteries.

My vision jumped in and out of reality as I kept losing my balance and struggled to stand straight. When I make it to the end of the hall where Elijah was still limping, I fumble for the banister to the steps and guid myself down crazily.

On the last few steps I tumble down onto my hands and knees crawling towards the kitchen door and use the handle to prop myself up then push it open.

"Em?"

Alessandro rushes to the door and picks me up and places me gently on the empty island.

"You good?" I blurry vision of Diego stands next to me eating a donut dunking it in his milkshake.

I refused to answer, it went through one ear and out of the other with no memory of what he just said. Bells just rang in my ears loudly as I tried to focus.

"Of course she's not good," I hear a murmur of Axel escape his mouth as he palms my head. Too much effort to tell him to get off of me.

The craziest thing was that I remembered every single nasty and spine tingling detail of what happened. The majority or it anyway.

My breaths pace as I my eyes wonder to a concerned stricken Alessandro and slide along the island with violently shaking arms.

"You need to go back to bed," Alessandro moves closer to me but I jerk back and press my cold hands all around me in search for some kind of defensive weapon.

Snatching Diego's plate, I frisbee it and its contents to Alessandro watching as it flies over his head and shatter into the wall right beside the door.

The door.

That same door I saw Blade exit out of that night. That night? How long have I been out for?

I relented every single detail of what happened. The way the blood poured form his body as Alessandro burnt and melted his skin.

He was dead. There's no way someone could survive that much torture.

"Woah calm down, Princess," Axel attempts to touch me but I push myself back a few inches on the island to signal I didn't want his touch.

"H-how long have I been... what?" I hold my head in confusion and sigh and groan when I forgot what I was going to say.

"How long have you been out?" Blade asks like he's guilty of a crime. I should think so. Though, I respect him too much to let what's happened to change my opinion on him.

"Y-yeah?" I close my eyes and rub the area on my head.

"A few hours."

"You need sleep," Alessandro attempts to take a step close but I hold him away at arms length.

My surroundings kept disappearing from my sight and they kept rolling around their sockets to the back of my head.

"I... I need answers," I cough loudly into a closed fist and fall to the ground weakly when I try to slowly slip down the side of the island.

My knees could barely hold my own weight, I felt so drained and exhausted to the point where breathing was a chore for me.

"You'll get them after you've rested," Alessandro pulls me to my feet but they buckle under themselves and flop around. I almost fall to the ground again but two hands where holding me from my underarms.

They were rough and they were squeezing me too hard making it uncomfortable for me when they were guiding me to the chair closest to me.

"You want food?" I see a blurry hand from Axel come to my vision with a spoon of dripping milk and fresh cereal.

What is going on? Who was that man? What did he do? Why was Alessandro hurting him? Is he dead?

All of which I wished I'd said aloud.

"No." I respond lazily.

"Oh my gosh is she okay?" A small feminine voice that was too sweet and blessing to my hearing echoes through the silent kitchen.

Mia? No.

Valentina? No.

Cordelia? No.

Oh. It was April.

"She fell down the steps. Because of me. All because of me. I'm the worst brother ever," I hear a cracking voice from Blade.

He's far from the worst brother. He's the best I've ever had. He never fails to make me smile.

"Don't be silly," Axel shakes his head.

They were right. I needed some sleep. Lots of it because I could barely hold my head up on my own shoulders without it lolling around like a dead bird's neck.

My lashes bat and twitch as my eyes roll backwards and hit my head on the flat surface of the island.

*********

"Dude, shut the fûck up!"

"You shut the fûck up!" A shirt whiny voice responds which shrilled in my ears making me cringe.

I hear a small smacking sound of a whooping hand and a moan of pain shortly after.

"No, Luca, you shut the fûck up!" A deep gravel of a voice which I knew belonged to Blade. Again, three more slapping sounds fill my ears.

"Don't be mean to Lulu he didn't do anything wrong!"

"Ty, shut the fûck up!"

"Hey! Don't hit me!" A miserable tone from Luca escapes his mouth.

They were all identified to me now; I could finally hear them better and understand who they were by the sounds of their voice.

I still felt like shit but I did feel better than I did earlier on this morning. Or last night. Time wasn't an occurrence to me right now, it was empty and unidentifiable.

I couldn't even sense if time existed considering my vision was still filled with the same fuzzy patterns behind my eye lids.

Every time I go to sleep, I can see different shapes moving like a gif in my head and these shapes change every single second or minute.

What was time?

Is it a concept of life going forward? Or is it a concept of leaving the present in the past?

How do we know what time it is? How did people in the old times know what time was without actually counting? Didn't they need numbers for that? When were numbers created for the concept of time and minutes to appear?

How do we know what year it is without counting from the day the Earth was born? Humans weren't there from the start of the Earth were they?

So many questions not enough time for me to answer them all. Maybe one day I'll change the future and be the next Einstein.

Considering my science grades from the end of year exams I doubt I'll ever be a scientist.

"Blade! Stop hitting my boyfriend! Don't be a big meanisaurusrex!"

"You can all shut the fûck now," I squeeze my eyes of their tiredness and blink a few times and stare at the ceiling for a shirt second before looking at the four figure standing in my room. Diego, Blade, Luca and Tyrone. They all stood before me with their hands stuffed into their pockets.

"Right... sorry, darling," I hear a sigh. I knew exactly who it was and I knew exactly what to say to him.

I missed him. I missed everyone. All except Romeo because he's just an ignorant little bîtch.

At least I can say I'm back to my witty, moody self for now.

"Blade is being mean to me," Luca grumbles and attempts to kick Blade in the ribs but his lanky self falls backwards when Blade tugs on his foot causing Luca to fall to the ground.

"Stop being mean to my boyfriend! It's okay Lulu," I see a shadow of Tyrone disappear then reappear with Luca.

Blade just laughs in his face and flicks Luca on the nose causing Diego to roll his eyes and come sit on the bed next to me.

"How are you feeling?"

"I feel like a chiropractor did more than just crack my bone," I gently press on my wounded head. Then I display my bruised knees to Diego then show his my cut arms and bruised elbows.

"You're clumsy," he laughs shaking my fragile knee.

"I'm not clumsy. You guys just have a habit of killing people and not telling me."

"Huh?"

I look up at Blade who gulped and stared at me guiltily with Luca in the headlock. Tyrone was trying to pull Luca's head from the tight, backwards 'C' shape of his arm by pulling him back by his shoulders.

Hehe. That's dumb. Unless you want to decapitate your love-bug then I suggest to don't pull him so hard.

"Yeah about that we aren't going to lie to you anymore. We promise," they all nod in response. Even Luca who was currently on the verge of dying almost nodded with tears eyes.

"Anymore?"

"Yeah."

"Okay?"

"Yeah."

"Explain?"

"Yeah."

"Go on then."

"Yeah."

"Are you going to keep on saying 'yeah' or am I going to have to throw this lamp at your head?" I jokingly chuckle at Blade with a hand clasped around the neck of the pink ceramic.

"Yeah."

"BLADE!" I shout.

"Oh right. Sorry. I was distracted," he releases Luca from his grasp where Tyrone cradles his in a large hug where Luca whimpers and cries.

Big baby.

"I heard that!" Luca shouts with tears brimming his eyes. Shît. I didn't think I said that aloud.

"Sorry, bro. And I thought I was sensitive," I lower my voice into a mumble but he has the hearing of a cat and cried even more.

Geez! Sorry!

"Okay I'll cut it short," Blade jumps on my bed and kicks his shoes off then crosses his long legs over each other.

"I'm sorry you saw that, I really didn't intend for you to see any of that because I thought you were sleeping and then you came downstairs then now everything is ruined. We were doing so well and now you probably hate me-

"Calm down. I don't hate you. I've seen much worse than that in my life. Heck, I've seen my brother get shot and I've seen myself bleed to death almost," I laugh to myself darkly at my past.

At least I'm strong new light I make some jokes about it now.

"No stop forgiving me! Can the rest of you get out?" He turns around viciously to face Tyrone and Luca then back to Diego with his fists clenched.

They got the message and scurried from my room in a jiffy without another word just leaving Blade and I in the room sat opposite each other.

"That man... he wasn't a good man," he closes his eyes carefully and takes a deep breath of encouragement.

"What did he do?"

"He ummm... he was one of our best customers."

I tilt my head to the side and look at him deeply, "For what?"

"I'm sorry... I don't think you'll forgive me. He would buy our stock. Lots of it too. Him and his friends would buy them," his head falls into his hands.

He takes a breath of air, "I promise you I'm trying to get Alessandro to get rid of this proportion of the mafia and I promise I won't stop until it's gone-

"Just tell me!" I huff and throw my arms up in the air impatiently and throw my head back immediately regretting it when my head hits the headboard roughly.

"WOMEN!" He shouts. Then he sighs sadly, "he stole a van of women from us. They hadn't had a bid on them yet and he hijacked the van and drive off with them. Thirteen women. We don't know where they are."

"That man is greedy. He's beyond greedy with women. Alessandro just taught him a lesson. A punishment at its finest," he shakes his head with guilt.

Greed? Talk about the family that would sell women for a little extra income.

I was beyond shocked but yet not surprised. Maybe a small glimpse of hole shine through me when you get told me that they sold women. I found it so hard to believe but this is just... horrendous. Those innocent women.

God know what happened to those women when they're bought. They're probably being touched in the places they don't want to be. Used for sexual pleasure. I'm beyond disgusted.

Slowly and tediously, I could feel a trail of bile trickling like a snake up my oesophagus but I swallowed it down.

They'd sell me if they could.

"I promise you darling, I'm trying everything in my power to stop this source of income. I-I'm ashamed of my family for this. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I'll do anything for your forgiveness," his voice shatters like glass as he gathers my hands in his and cries.

Droplets of tears fall onto to back of my hand then stroll to the palms and become absorbed by the fabric of my bedsheets.

"It's not your fault." I whisper feeling my voice shaky.

"Yes it is. I'm apart of this corrupt system so I'm still to blame," I could feel more hotness dripping from his eyes and into my hands as he kissed them and kept muttering apologies.

Does he want me to tell him it's going to be okay? It's been a day after my birthday and I'm already dealing with their shît once again.

All the baggage I let off my shoulders has just tripled in size to the point where I want to cry but I don't want to show him how it's hurting me.

However, I do have a little admiration for Alessandro for killing the guy. But it makes him no better for selling those women in the first place.

I want Felix. Now. Like right now. He's the only one who gets me and I need him right now.

I push Blade back with pushing his hands away from mine and scramble from my bed and rip the bandage from my head. Picking up the closest piece of clothing, I pull my grey joggers over my cycling shorts and slip my crocs on before bolting to the door.

Not the most stylish thing ever but I wanted to get away quickly and I needed to pick the closest things to me.

Romeo won't let me see Felix? So I go to him. Maybe I can stay there for the night and forget about my family.

Do I blame Blade? No.

Have I lost any respect for him? No. Why? Because he knows what's wrong in this corrupt, foul played business and has tried to make it right. I blame Alessandro, Elijah, Axel and Romeo. I wish death upon them all.

"Where are you going?" A sniffled Blade asks watching me as I leave my room.

"Home."

"Mila where are you-

"I'll be back soon, Rex," I slam my door shut and run as fast as I can in my crocs but they weren't sprinting material were they?

"Nah ah, you're on bed rest," Mia tries to stop me at the top of the stairs so I love to the left to pass her but she was too quick.

I push her but she pushes me back twice as hard. When I stand up again to run past her she pulls me back by the waistband of my grey joggers but she lets go letting the band snap into my spine casing me to fall over.

What does she want with me?! Doesn't she knows I hate her!?

Once I'm back on my feet whilst groaning in pain, I stand on her foot three times and try to squeeze past her but she pins me to the back wall with secured hands pressed to my shoulders.

"AXEL!" She screams when i bite her wrist in two different places. Then, I pinch her skin hard and twist it to escape her hold.

She pushes me roughly to the ground and sits on my back so I writhe underneath her and wriggle away kicking her in the stomach.

With a big push, she was off of me so I push her on her shoulders to assure the difference in distance between us. I pushed her too hard.

She looses her balance on the edge of the steps and falls backwards to the mass of sharp-cornered, black, charcoal steps.

I watch as she tumbled and rolls down the stairs with her hair getting tangled around her face. Every step drew on longer and longer in slow motion as I scared and jolt back from my actions.

At the bottom of the stairs was a screaming Axel who was quick to be by Mia's side. When she didn't get up I started to panic.

"Mia," he shakes her shoulders violently for a response. "MIA!"

"MIA GET UP!"

Blade comes out of my room sniffling you and wiping his fresh tears and reddened cheeks and peers over the railings at the incident unfolding.

Gulping, I notice there's an audience at the out of the steps looking up at me in awe. Romeo, Alessandro and Tyrone were both trying to wake Mia but there was still no response from her limp body.

I'm a murderer. I'm a killer. I'm a bad person.

"You!" Axel points at me and takes a large leap up the stairs and grabbed me ravenously by the neck and pinning me to the wall.

"If she's fûcking dead I swear I'll fucking kill you with my bare hands!" He grits out with a clenched jaw and tightening hands. He lifts me from the ground by my neck leaving me hanging in the air and begging for air.

"HEY! Remember she's your fûcking sister," Blade raises a hand and whips it sharply across Axel's face removing his hands from my airways.

Choking, I fall to the ground feeling my vision blur once again for the fiftieth time today. Taking deep breaths, I struggle to get my steady breaths back.

"I'm sorry!"

"Sorry won't fix anything if she's fûcking dead, you bîtch!" I try to follow him down the steps but he holds a hand out stopping me in my tracks.

"Don't," Blade takes my hand in his, "she was a bîtch anyways."

"It's doesn't matter! What if I killed her!" Tears stream down my cheeks as I sit at the top of the steps watching as Axel lifts the limp body into his arms and up the steps passing me without a glance.

Blade sighs next to me, seeming unfazed by any of this. I'm a killer. I'm a cold blooded killer. I'm no better than my brothers.

"You didn't kill her," he rolls his eyes and hugs me from the side as a sign of comfort but it didn't work.

"How do you know that?" I sob.

"I just do. Don't worry about her. I'm more worried about you over anything. Are you okay?"

"OF COURSE IM NOT OKAY! IM A MURDERER!" I snatch my ugly crocs from my feet and launch them down the steps.

Tyrone exits from Axel's bedroom and comes to sit beside me on the steps letting his rather long legs fall down a few of the black steps.

He holds open a bag of sour jelly snakes but I shake my head letting the tears drip from my nose and onto my grey joggers staining them black.

"She's not dead."

"Yeah I know," Blade replies to Tyrone with no emotion conveying his voice.

"I wasn't talking to you," Tyrone glances to Blade who was focused on his dancing toes under his Disney socks.

He was twiddling them about seeking invested in the dance routine he'd made for his toes.