Hello Everyone.

I have my son's Pre K graduation and party tomorrow, so here is the newest chapter.

Enjoy.

With Love

WhoooahKay

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Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, just the FUCKING KNOCKING ON MY WINDOW AT 2:30 IN THE MORNING.

I swear to god if this is Mason I'm gonna fucking kill him.

I groaned, sat up, turned on my lamp on my nightstand, and turned around.

Now what the hell is Ryan doing climbing up my lattice to knock on my window at 2:30 in the morning.

I slid my window up. "What the hell are you doing here." I whispered.

"I uh." He took a deep breath and wiped his face. "I need someone to talk to." He choked out. "And I can't talk to the guys because they'll tell me I'm being a baby back bitch." He nodded.

I can't tell you how serious my face got. "OK." I nodded and slid to the side. "Come on, come inside. It's freezing."

He crawled through my window and I closed it behind him.

"What is wrong." I shook my head.

"I uh." He sniffled. "I was in bed after talking to Havannah about everything we're doing today." He nodded. "I'm opening stuff with my family, and then going to her house for breakfast, and then we're going to my grandparents for dinner." He wiped his face. "And then she went to bed, and it hit me."

"What hit you Ry?"

He sniffled and took a deep breath. "This is the first time in 3 years that I have't been with Abby on Christmas." He started bawling.

My face sunk. "Ryan." I shook my head.

"I know." He cried. "I know. Havannah is great, and I really really like her." He nodded. "But she clearly deserves better because all I can think about is how I was supposed to get Abby a new charm for her bracelet like I've done every holiday since we got together. And how next year I was supposed to ask her to marry me since I'll be out house of the house and on my own and she's always dreamed of someone asking her to marry them on Christmas in front of her family and-"

"Hey." I wrapped my arms around him. "Hey." I squeezed.

"I miss Abby." He cried in to my shoulder.

"Ryan." I rubbed his back.

"I was good!" He sobbed. "I was doing so good, I was getting over her. And now tomorrows Christmas and with her is the only place I wanna be." He buried his face in my shoulder. "And I know. I know it's my fault. I fucked up so bad, but Ol I miss her!"

"I know buddy." I squeezed him. "And it's OK." I nodded. "You and Abby were together for 2 years, and you only broke up what, 3 months ago? Of course you miss her, Havannah knows you miss her babe. It's just going to take time to not."

"I don't want to miss her." He shook his head. "Havannah is good for me. She's a good person, and she's honest, and kind. She gorgeous, and pure to the point where I literally can't give her what she wants because the last time I had sex or I was actually with someone I destroyed 2 girls and I don't want to destroy another if something happens. Ol I can't- I can't-"

"Can't what?" I shook my head.

"Breathe." He choked out.

"OK." I pulled away. "OK OK. Just swallow and a take a deep breath." I grabbed the sides of his face. "Breathe with me." I nodded.

I started breathing in and out deeply not letting him look away from me.

"Come on Ry, breathe with me please."

He started taking shallow breaths for a few minutes before he could breathe normally again.

"Alright, there you go." I gave him a small smile.

He coughed and wiped his face. "I'm a really bad person."

"No Ryan you're not." I shook my head. "One mistake, doesn't make you a bad person. Abby, she's forgiven you. But when are you gonna forgive yourself."

He sniffled and looked down.

"Ryan, I don't think you miss Abby as a person, because she's still in your life. I think you miss what you two had. And you're so scared of having it again, because the last time you did hurt people. You did screw up. But let me ask you something, will you ever in your life do that again?"

"No. Of course not. I hated the fact that I made Tate feel like she was just a hole while I was bored, and I hated the fact that I hurt Abby so bad that I made her feel like I didn't see her."

"Because you learned from your mistake. Now let me ask you something else." I nodded. "What is Havannah's favorite color?"

"Green." He nodded. "I got her a necklace that matched the green ring she wears every day."

"What is her favorite candy?" I shook my head.

"Cotton Candy Pop Rocks, they make her feel like a kid again before her parents got divorced." He sniffled.

"And her favorite flower?"

"Tulips, because every Sunday her grandpa would bring her grandma tulips after church." He nodded.

"And her favorite ice cream?"

"The grasshopper pie from perry's." He wiped his face.

"All of those are right." I nodded. "And you know, because you never want someone to feel like you don't see them. Ryan, you learned all of that about Havannah, because she means something to you. Missing Abby or what you two had, doesn't mean you don't have feelings for her." I shook my head. "You don't want to ruin things because you do care about her. But babe." I wrapped him in a hug and squeezed. "Keep learning from the mistake, but don't shut yourself away because you're scared of making it again. You know what Havannah deserves, so be it. Keep being the guy who walks her to class, and talks her up when she feels like she's not going to get a contract she really wants. Be the guy who doesn't look at her like just a model because you see the person she is away from a camera. Be the Ryan she asked to get coffee, even knowing about the mistake you made, because she knows you aren't your mistakes. Be happy Ryan. One mistake doesn't make a bad guy. Not learning from it does. And you Ryan Andrew Chandler, are an amazing guy, you have such a good heart, and you, can make her the happiest girl alive, well aside from me, if you would just, let her the full way in."

He sniffled, wiped his face and nodded.

"Why don't you stay tonight puffy face." I rubbed his shoulders. "It's like 3 in the morning."

"OK." He nodded and choked out.

We both laid down and he rolled to face me. "Don't tell the guys, please."

"OK." I nodded.

Finally, Christmas!

I woke up the next morning knowing that my parents were already over at the Pates for breakfast, and that Connor would be home shortly with Sienna before he heads over to her grandparents for dinner, which is the perfect time for me to go wake up my pretty pretty girlfriend and tell her about our plans for after breakfast since Oaken will be at Bebe's and Jake is going to Kelsey's families.

"Good morning!" I yelled as I ran through her kitchen and up the stairs.

But when I busted in to her room, I did not expect to see her and Ryan passed out in her bed.

"What in the fuck!" I yelled.

She jumped awake and sat up. "Jesus Christ Mason, don't do that!" She looked up at me.

I raised my eyebrows and just pointed next to her to Ryan still passed out.

She looked beside her. "Oh." She pursed her lips.

"Oh." I nodded. "My best friend is passed out in your bed, when he wasn't here when I left last night, and all you have to say is 'oh.'"

"What are you implying." I crossed my arms.

"Why the fuck is he here Olivia! It's Christmas!" I threw my arms out to the sides.

"Can you stop yelling." Ryan groaned and sat up.

"What are you doing here." I shook my head.

He sighed and looked at Olivia. Then looked at me. "I had a bad night. I just needed someone to talk to." He shook his head.

"My house, is literally right there Ryan." I pointed out her window.

"And there's just, some things I can't talk to you guys about OK?" He nodded. "And I really don't like what you're getting at right now, so I'm gonna head home to open stuff with my family, and I will call you later." He kissed her cheek and rolled out of bed.

"Ryan." She sighed.

"Ol, it's cool. This, is exactly why." He pointed at me and walked out of her room.

She groaned and ran her hands through her hair. "Really?" She shook her head.

"Still waiting on an answer." I nodded.

"He showed up here, at 2:30 this morning, beating on my window and crying." She nodded.

"OK, and?" I shook my head.

"When was the last time you saw Ryan cry." She clapped her hands together.

"I don't know. Abby?"

She raised her eyebrows and nodded.

I sighed, flopped on her bed, and pulled my phone out.

I called Ryan and put it on speaker phone.

What do you want?

Did you leave yet?

Yes, I did. Figured with your holly and jolly mood I shouldn't stick around.

Just tell me what happened please.

You can ask your girlfriend because clearly if I can't even be in the same room as my FRIEND, you don't trust me right? Ol you can tell him, be sure to call him an asshole.

He hung up.

I groaned and looked up at Liv.

"This is the first Christmas in 3 years that he hasn't been with Abby." She nodded. "He was freaking out because he misses her, and doesn't want to miss her because she's great, and he finally broke down about why he hasn't stepped with Havannah yet, and he had a full blown anxiety attack. You guys, tend to make fun of each other when you cry, and well, he didn't feel like being criticized for feeling. You my love, are an asshole." She crossed her arms.

I sighed. "Baby I'm sorry." I got up and tackled her down to her bed. "I jumped, I panicked, and I shouldn't of. I'm a bad boy." I kissed her cheek. "I will apologize when he cools down, and I'm sorry if you feel like I don't trust you. I do. Just it's still going to take me time to not react after everything that has happened."

"Look at you." She ran her hands through my hair. "Learning." She nodded.

"Yeah yeah. Only because I want today to be completely perfect."

"And why is that?" She raised her eyebrows.

"Because it is our first big holiday as a couple. The first of many might I add. Connor will be at Sienna's after lunch. Oaken is going to Bebe's. Jake and Kelsey will be with her family, and I may or may not have convinced our parents to have a Christmas Movie Marathon over at my house so I can make you dinner, and we can give each other our gifts and spend our first Christmas night together." I smiled.

"You convinced our dads to have a movie marathon?" She pursed her lips.

"Or, I convinced our mom's and they didn't give them a choice." I shook my head.

She smiled. "I love you." She nodded.

"I love you more Shit Brick." I smiled. "Merry Christmas." I kissed her.

"Merry Christmas."

And then my phone started ringing.

It was Ryan.

I'm sorry. I love you.

I'm sorry. I love you too. I just-

Don't ever in your life think you can't talk to me. If you're crying over Abby or Havannah I know it's serious. Don't ever.

I know. Tell Ol thank you, I love her, and that I'm gonna be that guy.

You're on speaker phone.

"Good boy, now go get your girl!" Ol yelled.

"Yes Ma'am." He hung up.

"Better." She nodded.

"OK!" Her door came flying open. "Stop fucking and lets go." Oaken crossed his arms. "The mom's made a big breakfast, I get to drink a mimosa, and I want my presents." He smiled.

"Now no one was fucking." I crawled off and pulled her up.

"Yeah yeah. Just keep it in your pants while Connor and I are home. Him and Sienna are here, Bebe is here, and Jake and Kelsey just pulled in."

"Yeah yeah, we're coming." Olivia rolled her eyes. "You'd figure he was 5." She shook her head as he walked down the hall.

"Hey now, drop the attitude." I pulled her in and wrapped my arms around her waist.

"Oh and what are you gonna do." She crossed her arms.

I leaned down and whispered. "Keep it up, and find out." I kissed her neck.

"OOOF, Tweedle dumbass don't play with me." She shook her head.

"Call me that again, and your ass is going to be beat red." I nodded.

"You say that like it's a threat." She smiled and pulled away from me.

She walked out and I took a deep breath.

"Come on Tweedle Dumbass!" She yelled.

I really am gonna whoop her ass.

I got down stairs and everyone was already sitting at the breakfast table.

"Well it's about damn time." Connor laughed.

I sat down, and we all started eating.

"SO, we know you 6's plans." My dad nodded. "Mason, Ol, what are you doing tonight?"

"Well, we're gonna take a hefty nap when everyone leaves, then, we're going to go to the grocery store, pick up some stuff, and her and I, are going to make dinner together." I looked over at her.

Her smile grew. "Really?"

I nodded. "And then, we're going to put on some Christmas movies, get hot cocoa, make a bed in front of the fire place and give each other our gifts."

"Well are you sweet." Connor pouted.

"Yeah, shut up." I nodded.

"Well I think it's sweet. Very worthy of getting kicked out of my house." Jason looked at me.

I pursed my lips. "Thank you." I nodded.

"Mhm." He rolled his eyes. "Jake, Kelsey, how is wedding planning going?"

They both put their forks down, and looked over at Olivia and I.

"It's still OK." Olivia nodded.

"We uh, we actually have something for you to wear for the wedding." Jake cleared his throat and pulled 2 small boxes up from the table.

"Aren't we supposed to get you two something?" Holly gave them a look.

"Just, open them mom." Jake nodded and handed them to them.

Olivia grabbed my hand under the table and squeezed.

"You OK?" I whispered.

She swallowed hard and nodded.

"A necklace?" Holly looked up.

"And a pocket watch?" Jason nodded. "Father of the groom."

"Mother of the groom."

"Open them." Kelsey pursed her lips.

"Oh my dear lord." Holly looked at them as she opened hers.

"Grandfather of the flower girl." He smiled and nodded.

"Holy fuck you're having a baby?" Connor shook his head.

"Hey, mouth!" Jason pointed at him.

"We only found out what, a month ago?" Jake looked at Kelsey.

She nodded. "But, we're 5 months along. I just, clearly can't be held responsible with tracking my weight, and now we know why I have gained 20lbs."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "That's uh. That's great guys. Congratulations." I nodded.

They all heard a lot of congratulations, received a lot of hugs. Connor and Oaken left with their girls, and I headed over to my house to shower before I came back over.

But when I wrapped a towel around my waist and walked out, Jake was sitting on my bed.

"What's up?" I pursed my lips.

"I'm sorry." He nodded.

"You have no reason to be." I shook my head.

"I just, we waited until after you and Ol's first therapy appointments to tell her, just because between everything that happened between you two it never felt like a good time. But Ol said you hard a really hard time Tuesday at you two's appointment that we should wait to talk to you."

I sighed and sat down. "It's fine Jake." I nodded.

"Not really Mason. The timing couldn't be worse, but, we're really happy." He sighed.

"And you should be." I looked over at him. "I mean, I'm happy for you. You're going to be a great dad Jake. Just when it's my time it's my time. There's nothing I can do about it til then. So, until I have my own, I'm gonna be loving up on your baby in the mean time." I held my hand out.

He dapped me up and hugged me. "You're really OK?"

"Yeah, I'm really OK." I nodded. "Thank you, for checking on me though. Just uh, therapy is hard. Ol and I both need a night like tonight. Just to do something together, focus on each other."

"You know, I'm really proud of you for actually admitting that you need help?" He looked over at me. "I wish I would've had the balls to do that when I was going through it."

"It took me 3 months." I shook my head.

"But you still did." He put an arm over my shoulder. "So keep doing it."

I nodded.

"Now I, have more people to inform that my penis is magic, and you, your girl is waiting for her nap date." He pat my back. "Love you."

"Love you!" I yelled as he walked out of my room.

Was I expecting it? No.

Am I 100% OK? Absolutely not.

But, I am incredibly happy for him.

Just wondering why it couldn't have been me.

But, push that thought out.

Tonight's about you and your girl, no baby talk.

And to make her finger shine bright.