《Dear Crush! | A Dear Evan Hansen Fanfiction |》Drabbles 3
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It's honestly strange to see Jared doing anything serious.
That's why Evan had been so surprised when they managed to see Jared working at a nearby bakery recently. He was afraid to approach him, unaware as to how he'll react, so he watched him from afar.
He saw Jared sit behind the counter, manning the cash register. He would occasionally start by taking the bread the customer wishes to by in a bag, going through the transaction process and then bid them farewell with a smile.
Evan stared at this scene unfolding, noticing how different Jared was than his usual demeanour.
Evan absolutely loved the fidget cube that Connor gave him.
He found himself mindlessly toying with it whenever he had the chance to. It was especially helpful during his meditation. He needed to be calm and collected, and the fidget cube did exactly that.
Having it in his hands had brought back many memories of Connor, however. So, he felt conflicted with this item. On one hand, he loved it and the sentimental value of it. On the other hand, it kept reminding him of Connor even though he needed to think for himself and not for others.
He groaned, throwing his head back into the soft pillow, trying to maintain his mental strength to refrain from talking to anyone else about the situation.
"Wow, I..." Connor was speechless. He did not expect to be in such a situation, and certainly not so soon. He glances over at Evan, who held a gentle smile.
It was almost strange to him, considering how he was not the type to do this type of thing. It's also a miracle, how he managed to be encouraged by Evan into doing his work this early into the break.
Connor sat at his desk, at home. Evan had been lying down on the bed, drinking from a CapriSun mindlessly and scrolling on his phone. He spoke, the straw still gently clasped between his teeth.
"C-Con, i-it's just homework. I can help you whenever."
Never in his life had Connor Murphy once thought of someone in a nice way before.
Everyone around him had some quality he could immediately pick out. His sister was wonderful with finding unexpected ways to annoy him. His mother was a sap, so he had to be careful with the words he used. His father was seemingly unable to care about Connor.
Everyone at school was the same. Robert was a dick because he's insecure about god-knows-what. The crowd was only ever observant to drama. Everyone around him sucked.
And then, Evan.
He didn't really expect to find anyone decent, to be honest. He knew immediately that Evan was insecure, which could prove that he was an experienced pathological liar. Yet, he could notice that he showed interest in this kid.
He wondered, staring at the back of Evan's head as Evan desperately glanced up at the board to copy down notes.
Alana did like Zoe.
It's honestly strange to have this love for someone. You think off someone as this friend you've never been close to. Then, you start becoming best friends. You guys do everything together.
Bam!
Now you find yourself looking away, unable to maintain eye contact. Now you find it obsolete to stare at them and admire them from a distance.
How did this happen? When did it even happen?
She didn't know, but she would not change them.
"W-We...go to the orchard a lot, huh?"
Connor glances up from the homework laid in front of him. He then looks back, considering what Evan said.
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"Oh, you're right."
Connor scanned his mind, memories of events flashing before his eyes. The first little outing, the whole breakup, the picnic. The orchard was always a go to place for any sort of outing together.
"But hey, that means more memories, right?"
Evan glances up from his phone, seeing Connor giving him a gentle smile. Evan grinned, agreeing wholeheartedly.
"So, after everything we went through, this is your true self, huh?"
Zoe was surprised. Very much so. She had no idea that Alana had been capable of this.
Alana and Zoe had been surfing the net, trying to find something interesting to do to pass the time. This is when Alana stumbled across some lines from scripts. They both were suddenly interested in the lines, which lead to this situation.
They were now randomly saying lines from scripts, attempting to sound professional.
"Your 'past regrets' might just grow up and save you, after all." Alana spat, portraying every bit of emotion should could from the lines.
They found this specific script, which caught their interest. The character had been abandoned by their parent in the past, which lead them to grow up to become a fighter. She saved her mother from a dangerous creature, begrudgingly bringing her to their hideout.
They ended up arguing, causing a spout of anger brewing in her mother to call her a regret.
Hearing Alana portraying that specific emotion of anger and power sent chills down Zoe's spine. She could almost feel the pressure of the character's glare on her.
"That's amazing, Al! You sounded genuine!"
"Yeah," she mutters, chuckling, "I've had my fair share of drama classes."
Jared knew his boundaries when it came to jokes.
He knew exactly what to do if he had offended anyone with his jokes, as well as the mental note he takes of each person he's offended. Of course, the next time he does said jokes, he will try to emphasise that it's a joke, instead of flat out insulting the person again.
Now, it's different with Evan. He knew Evan was extremely sensitive to any sort of jokes, so he would often introduce them with a light seasoning of a chuckle. He could tell when he took it too far, and he knew how far he should go to play it safe.
If Evan ever tells him that he doesn't appreciate a specific type of joke, Jared will flat out ban it from his vocabulary if they are near Evan.
Why does he do this?
Easy.
He knew that he was uncomfortable with them, and so he listened.
Perhaps this is a lesson everyone should learn.
"Hey, Ev?"
They had been at home, pretty worn out for the day. In fact, Evan had been ready to jump onto a bed and sleep the remainder of the day away. Connor, however, still felt awake. Of course, he was much more hysterical than before.
"Yeah," he muttered, his mind ignoring the fact that he didn't feel anxious over his tone being slightly less friendly. He had been absolutely lethargic, unable to even care about it.
"English is super weird."
Silence.
"Wh-What do you mean, Con?" Evan asked, chuckling slightly at the sheer randomness of his thoughts.
"I mean, like? Your mind. Has. To follow,,,, these...things? Like~ squiggly lines! And dots-"
Connor paused, digging into his pocket to bring out his phone. He then intensely stared at the screen, scrolling through in search of something. He then lit up upon the discovery, showing the phone's content to Evan.
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He showed Evan a post on the exact topic he had been discussing. A sentence that is made up of words and various different punctuation, which made Evan's mind read it just as it has been notated.
"Huh? I-I guess you're r-right?"
Silence.
Evan reviewed Connor's statement about English being strange, and immediately he started a small chuckle. That small chuckle then evolved into a laugh, and then soon he had been howling.
Connor looked at Evan, his face reddened from hysterically laughing at nothing. Immediately, he joined in, being unable to continue a conversation.
They were laughing to the point thag they were coughing. It was simply whimsical that they could laugh at nothing for such a long while.
Eventually, they managed to calm down, with the occasionally giggle escaping from them as they tried to calm themselves down.
"Wh-Why did we even laugh-I mean, nothing was even f-funny about that?" Evan asks, trying to take a deep breath to recover from the lack of air in his lungs from the laughter.
Connor shrugged, both still attempting to get their hysterical laughter under control. It was senseless fun, and they both loved it. The knowledge that they both can enjoy each other's company.
Jared is a very casual about himself. Well, his sexuality. The thing with it is that he does not speak of it, until someone asks him.
He feels that there is no need to flaunt his sexuality, so he offers no hints to what he might be. He does not even disclose a hint about it if he was asked discreetly. Instead, he will shift the topic until the asker gets annoyed or gives up on finding out.
Honestly, he wants people to stop asking. It was unnecessary, since his sexuality shouldn't matter if he loved a person.
He just reached home. He had been exhausted, the day had been extremely difficult. There was a lot of homework that were given by the teachers, used as revision to test themselves for oncoming exams.
He was honestly very surprised to come home to a message from Evan.
{uh, Jared. I know this is weird to ask but}
{what do you identify as}
He was certainly not expecting Evan to ask this question, and it was certainly out of the ordinary. He was honestly proud that Evan could ask such a question.
Then, he stared at the message for a few seconds longer.
This isn't Evan. Evan usually typed with proper grammar, which included things such as punctuation. To see a message from Evan, without any actually punctuation shows that it was someone else. Besides, Evan should have been apologising for asking the message anyways. He was usually paranoid about it.
He was about to type a response, when he saw that Evan had been typing. It was a frantic type, since it took a while for the message to show up.
{Sorry, that was Connor!}
Jared paused, a little relieved that Evan was not the one who asked. As much as he was open with the idea of revealing is sexuality, it was nerve wrecking to see what his friend would say.
{Uh, did u want to know tho???}
It took Jared a few moments to contemplate sending that little message. He wanted to tell his friends, he really did. He just needed the confidence to back it up.
For some reason, he felt a little less nervous thinking about sending this to Evan.
{Only if you want to!}
{I don't want to force you!}
Jared almost typed out his response, which was the answer to Connor's question. Yet, he felt that he still needed a bit more time.
{Yeah, im gonna wait a bit befor telling u guyssss}
Cynthia was worried for her son.
She was absolutely terrified for her son, ever since she first found out he had wanted to commit suicide. She found the pills in his room while she had been cleaning.
There was three bottles, all about half or quarter filled from the family's occasional use. If he took from all three bottles, it might induce an overdose.
Clearly, she was worried about how Connor would have done.
Imagine how a mother must feel, to know that her son wanted to commit suicide, and she had discovered evidence of it days before.
Cynthia now looked at her son, who had been much more hopeful than ever before. How he's evolved into this better person all because did his new friends. It was a wonderful sight to see.
She absolutely loved how he turned out quite different from her.
Her past was something she hated. She had no one to turn to in her times of need, even as a small child. How delightful she had been that Connor was treated in a way that differed from her.
Sometimes, she could not help but just glance at Connor, playfully nudging Zoe as they sat at the table and wonder if this could have been her.
Good For You, Connor, she would think to herself, very proud of what Connor has achieved.
Sometimes, Evan wanted to end his life.
Everything that had been pressured onto him had been too overwhelming, which would make him want to desperately find something to end it all.
The fact that he's tried, and failed, showed him a different world. He still remembers to adrenaline rushing through his body, as he climbed the tree. He notices the fresh smell of the tree as he held onto the the branch.
He realised the strange sense of enlightenment, glancing over the horizon and wondering if everything will end this easily. Looking down at the long drop filled him with fear, and yet, relief.
And yet, he looks at himself in the mirror now.
He's found that, he has never looked happier. He had a casual smile on his face, he could feel himself wondering about the day's events, rather than spending every moment to find something about himself to criticise.
He's found that, everyone of his friends cared for him, and loved him. They all were no longer strangers who would pass each other, but companions who would respect each other.
He's realised that, he's been found. After so many years of this heavy sense of being alone, being abandoned, being rejected, he's finally gotten a chance to experience such a wonderful feeling of hope.
He has been found.
The people in Evan's friends group were actually quite multilingual, which was a fascinating thing.
Evan was Jewish, so he could speak quite a bit of Hebrew. It wasn't as if he was fluent in it. He just knew how to speak a bit of it, like words for something here and there.
Alana had lessons on languages, but she never says what they were. Zoe did hear her speak so French at one point, so she can only assume that she's taken French classes, outside of school.
Jared actually knew how to sign. It's strange, but he decided to learn it one day. Now, he's decent at signing, although he does get some signs wrong every once in a while.
The only two people who didn't know an additional language was Connor and Zoe. They did not have the time to try and learn a new language, since they both were not in the best conditions for learning.
What's interesting is, Zoe had decided to take up some Japanese. She downloaded two files on her phone, each containing some four hundred pages of slides. They were filled with all sorts of different words in Japanese, as well as the grammar for them. Connor felt interested and he followed in her footsteps, taking up Chinese.
Both were interested, but Zoe's the only one who properly stuck with a serious learning schedule.
Now, if you listen closely enough, you could here Connor quietly muttering 他媽的, under his breath as he accidentally messed up something and Zoe occasionally repeating short statements to herself, describing her course of action ; 僕が疲れました, she would mutter as she laid down on her bed.
When Connor had still been a tad bit interested in taking up Chinese, Evan would occasionally ask him about what certain words were in Chinese. Of course, he would try his best to translate it for him.
"O-okay, okay. Wh-um…what's 'tree' in Chinese?"
Connor would see Evan, all bouncy and intrigued to know the answer. He would chuckle, trying to calm him down by explaining that he needed time to think.
"If I remember correctly, '樹'."
His pronunciation was off, slightly. The word was shù, an emphasis, like pressing down onto the word. Instead, he said it like 'shoo', which made it sound nothing like what the word was suppose to sound like.
Evan would become so intrigued by the word, giggling more and more. Connor looked at him being all bubbly, and he would smile.
"Evan, can I tell you something?"
Evan glanced at Connor, nodding furiously. He was excited to see what else Connor had learned, studying the Chinese language.
"我很愛你."
Connor noticed that Evan had been very intently staring him down, as if he had been expecting something. Connor raised an eyebrow, confused as to what else he wanted.
"W-well? What does it mean?"
Connor chuckled, planning to do something evil. He lifted his finger and placed it in front of his lips, shushing Evan. He then quietly muttered.
"It's a secret."
This caused Evan to tug at Connor's shirt for the next few minutes, attempting to persuade Connor to reveal the meaning of the words to him as he refused, chuckling.
Jared was excited.
He had been telling a joke to people which he found absolutely hilarious. He had so many people groaning, a smile on the face as they facepalmed.
He finally went up to Evan and Alana, who had been discussing their seperate Maths homework. Jared went up to them both and tapped on their shoulders, earning their attention.
He then told his joke, still giddy from smiling.
"Guys, I've got a joke. Okay so, which one is correct? The egg yolk is white, or—" Jared starts to laugh, but controls it in time to co time speaking— "okay sorry. The egg yolk is white or the egg yolk are white?"
"Well, it's clearly 'the egg yolk is white'," Alana answers, confidence brimming as she reveals a smug grin. "Clearly, 'are' is not grammatically correct here."
Evan nodded his head, agreeing to her explanation. They both saw that Jared had been covering his mouth, almost ready to laugh. It took him a moment to regain his ability to talk.
"R-really?" He is about to explode into laughing at this point, "cuz the answer is neither."
"W-wait, what? B-but the first one should be c-correct?" Evan asked, absolutely confused.
"Pfft, but guys. I thought egg yolks were yellow, not white?"
Evan groaned, placing his head in both his palms to bury his face from the lame joke. Meanwhile, Alana was playfully slapping Jared's arm, trying her best not to giggle while Jared howled with laughter.
Alana had once needed to babysit for an aunt.
She thought that it would be a decently easy job. All she needed to do was take care of two kids while their parent was out.
Imagine her surprise when she stands in a puddle of flour, as one of the kids managed to rub makeup all over his face while the other was throwing Lego's across the room.
"Lovely," she mutters, as she notice the kid with the make-up dashing across the room, finding some pens in a drawer to draw on himself, "just lovely."
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