The sun was shining bright.

The brilliant yellow of the sun covered Evan's room in a warm layer of colours, brightening his room. Every inch of his room had been covered with the warmth of the sign, clearing away the signs of cold, the cool colours of blue from the dark night.

The birds flew by outside, singing and cheering beautifully as they flew by, eager to search for food to return to their nests to feed their chicks.

Despicable.

Evan tasted disgust in his mouth, absolutely detesting the bright colour of the sun shining through his room. The warmth against his skin, the singing of birds. All of it seem to mock Evan and his feelings. He did not sleep well. In fact, he was deep in thought, to the point he could not properly sleep at all.

He kept recollecting the horrible events of the past night, over and over in his mind. He kept thinking about the entire situation, devastated to be trapped in this constant loop. He would stare at the ceiling, thinking about his actions as he felt the dark night consume him.

He thought about his tone, how it was too aggressive for someone like him. He thought his words, how easily he surrendered to Connor's suggestion. He thought about how aggreovated he had been towards Connor. Connor did not deserve Evan's harsh words. Why should anyone be forced to suffer harsh words?

The thought of Connor being heartbroken over his words made his heart absolutely shatter. He knew that it was technically his own decision, and yet, he could not help to think that, maybe he actually wanted to be away.

That thought scared him.

To recognise that he may have wanted to shy away from Connor. He subconsciously felt that he may have only fallen in love with Connor because he showed Evan affections. That skyrocketed his heart rate, causing him to feel a sense of panic. He could feel a slight tinge of uncomfortablility, as his heart pounded against his chest.

It was the strangest feeling to Evan. He felt his heart racing, and yet he did not feel any strong sense of panicking. It was like panicking and unable to control it, and yet it did not feel as if it was difficult to control.

Evan would focus back on the ceiling to control this uncomfortable feeling, only to realise that the originally dark ceiling with lines of shadow from the window frame blocking the moonlight imprinting on the walls change into bright yellow hue with a darker shadow shining on the window frame. The fluttering of curtains from the dreadfully cool wind being silenced by the warm morning, setting his cool skin ablaze.

He would instead focus on the wall and not the colour, subtly controlling his breathing once more.

He sat up in his bed, with a head of messy hair. He had bags under his eyes, radiant from the few nights of unrest. Tired, he brushed his hand through his hair, attempting to try something that would wake him a bit. Instead, he brushed his hand through his hair and moved to the base, scratching his neck.

He yawned, stretching his hands out and noticing the tears in his eyes from the yawn blurring his vision slightly. He then gripped the soft blanket, throwing it off himself as he turned towards the door, placing his feet onto the warm floor.

He stood himself up, slowly dragging himself towards the door while contemplating his future actions. He gripped on the door knob, pausing slightly.

Maybe he should talk to Connor?

He should be able to work this out with him…

…right?

He turned the knob, pulling the door and seeing his mother once again rushing about. She glanced in his general direction, and immediately her expression of worry was obvious. She walked over to Evan, absolutely tense. She held onto Evan's face, turning it towards the left hand the right.

"Evan, do you need me to stay at home today?"

Evan felt himself frown, his shoulders pointed upwards. He hated seeing his mother with this expression. The ultimate expression of being worried, but correctly so. Her expression always held the correct amount of tension. The fact that her emotion was usually a reflection of Evan's emotion was absolutely aggravating.

"I-I know I look bad, Mom. Don't worry, I've ju-just been sleeping a little bit less b-because of homework."

He could tell that she did not believe him for even a second. Her expression softens, as if to urge Evan to give in and let her help. He strengthened his heart, ignoring the painful ache of turning her down.

Heidi knew that Evan was emotional troubled, and she wanted to help so badly, but Evan usually was not the type to accept help. She knew that from experience. Begrudgingly, she accepted Evan's decline, giving him a kiss on his forehead.

"I'm here for you, okay?"

Evan felt his grip on the hem of his onesie grow stronger, as he bit his lip. Those words were painful to hear. It made his heart ache, but he nodded in acknowledgement.

"O-of course, Mom," Evan replied, watching Heidi give him a smile. She then turned away, heading for the door and opened.

What he did not expect was Jared standing in the doorway, arm hovering towards the side of the door, about to press the doorbell. He looked pleasantly surprised as the door opened, as did Heidi.

"O-Oh!" Jared stuttered, absolutely taken aback by the door opening so suddenly, especially since it was a rather perfect timing. He waved his hand, greeting Heidi politely, "Good morning, Mrs Hansen!"

"Good morning, Jared," she greeted back, a little relaxed. She figured that Jared could help Evan through whatever problem he was dealing with, which lifted a weight off her shoulders. She moved over to her left, gesturing for Jared to come in. Jared politely accepted the invitation, taking off his shoes and placing them on the shoe rack directly beside the door.

He stepped onto the carpet that was in front of the door, making sure to wipe his feet before he stepped into the house. Heidi smiled, and then waved goodbye to both of them before leaving for work.

As soon as Heidi left, Evan glanced over to Jared, who was still waving back at Heidi. It was a mystery as to why Jared was even here, although that was usually the case. He could not help but have a strong inkling as to what happened. He knew it was about yesterday.

It only made sense. Evan disappeared for nearly half a day, it would make sense that Jared was worried. Worried enough to check on him. He frowned, his mind conjuring questions that stressed him to no end. Questions and scenarios flashed in his mind, practically all of them ending with Jared being angered and storming out of his house.

He could feel the strange sense of uneasiness, absolutely being unable to breathe when a tap on his shoulders shattered his stressful racing of thoughts. He looked up, noticing that Jared had turned towards him, a smile on his face.

"Evan, you cool?" he asked, his smile subtly calming Evan's mind. He could feel his uneasiness dissipate, allowing him to breathe better.

Evan attempted to smile, which proved to be more difficult in practice. Jared sighed, and walked into Evan's room. He sat down on the bed, which created a loud creaking noise, as he pat the seat next to him. Evan took a deep breath, attempting to calm himself. He took steps forward, eventually sitting down next to Jared.

Between them was silence.

Evan would glance over at Jared, absolutely terrified to try and ask. He knew that what he did was wrong. He ran out, leaving all his friends behind without a single explanation. And yet, he feels that it was not the only part where he was wrong ; he did not climb the tree. He did not stare down, feeling the despair creep over his heart.

Jared did not spare Evan a glance. He slouched over, staring at Evan's floor, at his own twiddling thumbs. He had so many questions to ask, and yet he could not work up the courage to ask. He did not even know how to phrase it. It took him more than a minute to even think about what to say, when Evan spoke up.

"You, uh," Evan stammered, unable to find the right words, "why a-are you here?"

He mentally scolded himself for the terrible way he phrased it. It sounded as if he hated the idea of Jared being in his house. He could not help but correct himself, stuttering and tripping over his own words to explain his own words. He spilled about how he did not mean for it to sound as if he did not feel that Jared should be welcome, but rather, he was curious, when Jared cut him off.

"Evan," Jared spoke, causing Evan to flinch. Jared sounded ferocious, and yet calm and soothing at the same time, "care to explain yesterday?"

Evan remained silent, unable to think of words to say. He was not in the right state of mind for this conversation either. He had just spent the whole night rethinking the various scenarios in his brain. He bit his lip, glancing away from Jared's earnest stare.

Jared said nothing. He knew that his stare alone was giving Evan a mountain worth of pressure, so he knew that he should not add to that pressure.

"…I'm sorry."

"…alright. What about the orchard?"

"…"

"Zoe said you didn't jump. What did she mean by that?"

Evan's heart was pounding, loudly against his chest. He felt himself grip onto the bed sheets, completely uncomfortable with how the whole situation was headed. He twisted his toes together, attempting to feel less anxious about the approaching topic.

"I-I…fell asleep. A-At the base of the tree—it-it wasn't…I didn't jump."

Jared turned to Evan, appalled to hear that it had remotely crossed Evan's mind before. This would mean that what Connor told him was true. Evan had tried to end his own life, and Jared laughed at his misery.

He saw that Evan looked away, seemingly ashamed to face Jared. Understandable, considering how he made all his friends worried.

"That's…that's good. I was scared. I thought you did."

"…"

The atmosphere seemed to be much more tense than before, which only added pressure to Evan. Jared was simply trying to process that he was confronting Evan about this.

"Evan, I'm sorry."

Evan turned to Jared, confused. He saw that Jared was once again staring at the floor, at his own twiddling thumbs. He held a solemn expression, showing the sincerity of his apology.

"Wh-What? Why are you even apologising?" Evan asked, expressing his concern, "I-I mean, I'm the one who's at f-fault!"

"I'm sorry for laughing, Evan."

This made Evan even more confused.

"I-I didn't even hear you laugh, Jared. What do you—"

"You've tried before, right?"

This shut Evan up almost immediately. He knew what Jared was referring to, and the memory made him flinch. He did not even realise that Jared was aware of his attempt, much less to have came to apologise for it.

"C-Connor…" Evan muttered. His name was strange right now, especially after what happened. The syllables left a tinge in his mouth, his body feeling uncomfortable just by the mere mention of it. This uncomfortable feeling forced him to grip at his onesie.

"…he told you, didn't he?"

Jared did not move, but Evan got the message. He was a little perturbed that Connor mentioned this to Jared, but he chose to believe that it was out of good intent.

"I'm really sorry, Evan. I messed up. I mocked you, not knowing to understand you felt for it. I know it's ridiculous to forgive me for it, but I—"

"I forgive you, Jared," Evan interrupted, already feeling distraught over making his best friend upset over his decision, "i-it's okay, really—"

"But it's not," Jared exclaimed, feeling his nose sour. Evan flinched, as Jared abruptly sat up. Jared turned to Evan, allowing Evan to notice the tears in his eyes as he continued with what he wanted to say.

"Evan, I—I made fun of you, when you needed my help the most. I chose to mock you, when you needed my comfort. Isn't that fucked up? Me! Mocking his suicidal friend!"

"Jared, I told you, I'm okay! You don't—"

"Have to beat myself over this? Are you shitting me?" He finished, at this point an emotional mess. He was completely blaming himself for being an awful friend, but Evan knew only he himself was at fault.

"Jared, I—I was the one who didn't try…um…try to reach out to you. I-If I did, then maybe you would have helped me, b-but I didn't."

Jared frowned, tearing up. What Evan said was true, but what he himself did was also horrible. No matter the situation, he mocked Evan for it. He mocked Evan for his injury instead of trying to help him through it. That alone was condemnable.

"I didn't help you, Evan. How could you be so forgiving? The only other person whom you feel a decent amount of comfort talking to, absolutely mocking you for something you were working through, just like that?"

At this point, Jared was no longer calm. In fact, he had been screaming and shouting. He could not even begin to imagine the pain that Evan felt, which only made the situation worse. He could feel tears threatening to fall, bringing him closer to sobbing.

"L-Like I said, it's okay! Y-you—i-if you feel like you…um…you haven't had the ch-chance to make it up to me, you've already done plenty!"

Jared could only start to feel the warm tears falling down his face, as he tried his best not to let out sobs. He gently sat down on the bed next to Evan, trying to hold back any signs of him breaking out in hysterical crying. Evan witnessed Jared in this pitiful state and tried to reach out and give him comforting pats when Jared suddenly lunged towards Evan.

He wrapped his arms around Evan, giving him a hug as he gently sobbed into his shoulder. Evan, surprised, flinched upon contact, but soon relaxed.

"I'm so sorry, Evan," Jared sobbed, pressing his face into Evan's shoulder. Evan smiled, feeling his own tears almost starting to fall as he wrapped his arms around Jared, both comforting each other.

Evan realised that he has an important news to inform Jared, which prompted him to start practicing his lines over in his head as Jared pulled away. He stared at Jared, signalling him to silently wait for Evan to finish recollecting his thoughts.

"O-okay, Jared. P-Please…um…d-don't be mad. Know that this was…um…this was a mutual agreement."

Jared already had a faint idea of what Evan might want to say, but he remained silent.

"C-Connor…" Evan paused, once again bewildered by how unusual and foreign his name felt rolling of his tongue, how the person he was with yesterday could change so much to him to the point saying his name is strange.

"…Connor and I. We…um…we agreed to spend some t-time apart."

Evan saw that Jared's faced morphed into a vexing expression, and then change into a calmed expression.

"Understandable. It was emotionally scarring, you…you both need time apart."

Evan sighed with relief, knowing that Jared did not over react to the news as much as he expected him to. He saw Jared let a smile, standing up. He walked towards the door, beckoning Evan to come. Evan followed, absolutely mystified as to the reason.

"You haven't had your breakfast, right?"

Evan nodded.

"Well, I'll make you some."

Evan smiled, feeling happy that his relationship with Jared has become better.