《Quiet Ice, Silent Nights》Her Song
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"Cat?"
"Yes Princess?"
Marinette folded her arms around herself for warmth, leaning against the railing of her balcony and looking up at her perched feline friend, ready to flee into the steadily lightening night.
He looked down at her with a tired smile, having had a fantastic time watching her skate but now in great need of a cat nap before school.
"I was going to ask, that song you were humming. What was it?"
Cat Noir stiffened, an uneasy chuckle slipping out as he reached up to scratch lightly at the back of his neck. If she didn't know better she'd say he almost looked sheepish.
"It's not a real song. Or well, it is I guess but I made it up."
She gasped, turning to grip the railing in her hands and standing on her tippy-toes. She didn't look tired at all it was completely unfair.
"You made up that song?! But it's so pretty!"
He grinned playfully, his belt tail curling on its own accord. "Oh what since it's pretty I couldn't have made it?"
Their breath made white clouds as they laughed, the chill not bothering either of them very much, drawing out their interaction if only for a few more minutes.
"I just didn't know you were so good with music is all," she qualified, tilting her head cutely in the way she did when she was curious. "Do you sing?"
"Sing? No, no not on your life," he laughed, shaking his head at the very idea. He could sing, but he definitely chose not to if he had the option. Humming was different. "No, I play piano though. That's what I wrote the song on."
She gasped cutely again and it made him chuckle.
"I wanna hear it!" she surprised him by saying, the cat almost losing his balance as he turned his body to more easily face her. "I want to hear the whole song! What's it called?"
"Wait what!?" he blurted out, tail twitching nervously at the thought of actually playing it for her, but there was no way he could say that. He had no room to talk since she had just spent two hours skating so he could watch. But this was different, it was way more embarrassing (in his opinion). The song was actually about her. Oh there was no way he could tell her that.
"Please Cat? It would be fun I think, for me to see something you're good at. I showed you ice skating!"
"I was not aware this was an eye for an eye type situation when I got involved," he pouted, tail continuing to twitch and curl until it wrapped around his boots almost moodily.
"Will you really not even tell me what it's called?" she whined, bouncing a little as she pleaded with him.
He felt hot in the face as he searched for an answer.
"I-it doesn't have a title," he lied, knowing full well that it did, but her eyes narrowed, catching on to him instantly. She didn't press or interrogate further, she could tell he was cracking.
"You'd laugh at me if I told you," he added a moment later, still frying under her gaze as she continued to stare silently, until finally he sighed. "Okay, fine it's- it's called- don't laugh. It's called Ice Flower."
She didn't laugh like he had feared, in fact her reaction was probably more nerve wracking than laughing. She blushed, and he was instantly extremely embarrassed.
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"This was before tonight! And I had seen you skate before for those few minutes and, well I sorta- I was playing and-"
"That's so sweet," she cut him off, his eyes widening as she smiled nervously, a blush still prominent on her face. His own was probably no better. "You wrote a song because you saw me dancing?"
"Well when you say it like that..." he trailed off, looking down off the edge of the building and contemplating the height a bit dramatically.
She giggled quietly, and he was honestly surprised she wasn't teasing him or mad even. He wasn't sure why she would be mad but she might have been, it would have made more sense than... flattered.
"Well," she finally said after a moment's silence, "now I really want to hear it. But if you don't want to show me that's okay."
She started to walk away, stooping to pick up her ice skates and walking towards the hatch in the floor of her balcony.
"It's just not done is all," he found himself saying, wanting to explain it somehow, but also agreeing with her. It was her song, he realized that he wanted her to hear it too. "But I could keep working on it. Once it's done then... yeah maybe I can show you somehow. Find some unguarded piano at night."
She looked over her shoulder, smiling at him in a way that was very... at peace. "I'd like that. Goodnight Cat, see you tomorrow?"
Cat Noir looked on, a little stunned by the soft smile she gave him. "Y-yeah... see you tomorrow, goodnight."
He heard more than saw the hatch open with a squeak since his eyes were trained on her until she vanished inside, the balcony instantly that much colder. He turned back forward, sitting a moment more on her railing while he thought about the way she had been acting since she got off the rink that night. She was a little more normal. When he was Cat Noir there was always sort of a barrier between them, like she was very careful about everything she said, and when she was Adrien her nerves usually got the best of her and he couldn't help but think he had intimidated her somehow when they first met. Now though she had shared something very personal with him, and it was like one of those walls had fallen down. Not all of them, no definitely not all of them, but a big one. It made him happy to think they had gotten closer in some way.
He leapt off fearlessly into the night, running for home to maybe get a little more rest in thinking all the while of how he might make her song better. If he really was going to play it for her... it had to be just right.
--
The following week Adrien worked diligently on the song, crafting it into something he was proud of even going so far as to ask his instructor for help with it. He found time to tap out parts of it against his notes for history, found some way to hear its tempo in the clashing of swords during fencing. He was tired definitely, what with the homework and the lessons and the shoots and the akuma attacks but none of that stopped him from meeting Marinette at 3 AM every night (morning?). She could see he was getting worn, calling off one of their meetups because "I'm totally swamped with homework! I'm sorry, the day after though for sure," even if he had known she was lying. It had actually been one of the lightest days for homework so far, he knew she was just trying to give him time to rest. He didn't protest though, even Ladybug had begun to notice and scolded him for not taking care of himself. She had been surprisingly warmer as well, smiling a little easier at his jokes, laughing at his antics more often than being annoyed by them... he wasn't sure what had changed but he wasn't complaining. He loved it.
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He found a balance between being everywhere he was meant to be and getting enough sleep in between, working the whole time on Ice Flower. Eventually it was twice as complex and finally sounded like something he could show to the person who had inspired it. He kept a few days more though... to practice. And procrastinate, plan where to find a piano... procrastinate.
He was nervous alright?
However it was a great help to his nerves how they just seemed to get closer by the day (night). He could be himself, just like with Ladybug, and also just like his lady he was about equal with either getting a laugh for his puns or a punch in the arm. He saw her in an entirely new light, could see their new inside jokes in the shape of her lips every time she talked, wishing she might say "Slippy kitty," but knowing she wouldn't, not when he didn't have the mask. He wanted her too though.
It was about seven days in to their nightly hangouts that he dreamed about unmasking himself to her for the first time.
He had the same dream a thousand times, with alternate endings each time, except with Ladybug not Marinette. To want her to know was natural, he knew they could never be together as long as they didn't know so... he had often dreamed that maybe if he just threw caution to the wind and ripped his ring off she might... probably not though. He knew that...
He had thought about telling Nino as well a handful of times, he was his best friend. Those dreams never lingered for very long though, he knew why he couldn't tell Nino. The idea of having him in on it was entertaining but... no. Things would be too different, as cool as Nino was he was often afraid Nino would stop viewing him as Adrien completely.
His dream with Marinette though...
He had shown up at her balcony, a while later than was normal for him. The sky was starting to get brighter, the overcast sky a powdery gray as he landed on her railing. He had sat down on the ground, watching her hatch, and she appeared a few minutes later like she had sensed he was there. She didn't have her skates, and she wasn't wearing her winter coat. She was wearing something light and flowing, a pale yellow summer dress with white printed daisies decorating it throughout. She had snow in her hair and dusting her thin shoulders though none fell from the sky, yet another sign none of it was real.
"Cat! You didn't come before," she had said, walking towards him.
"Sorry, Marinette," his own voice had called out, watching her approach him unbashfully since there was no real fear of being impolite. "But I wanted to tell you something."
"Okay," she said with a smile, tilting her head a little, the snow shifting around her but never quite falling. "What is it?"
"What would you say," he asked timidly, "if I told you we knew each other in real life?"
"I'd say that's great," she responded right away.
"What if I was Adrien?"
"Are you?" she asked, smiling like she already knew.
He said nothing.
"Well," she filled the silence, sitting down in front of him, "I'd say it changes nothing."
"Nothing?"
"Nothing at all. You're still a slippy kitty. You're still my friend. Is that okay?"
His dream-self sighed, nodding his head before reaching out to hug her, her body so warm it almost burned him.
"That's perfect Princess."
He had jolted awake roughly with his face burning with embarrassment at his mental image of her, so small and pretty, smiling at him. What lingered the most though was how... okay it felt. When his dreams showed him an equally understanding Ladybug it had always seemed wrong. Never would it be that easy, that simple. It could happen, it might happen, he had to believe that but... it wouldn't be like that. He didn't understand then why it was Marinette who accepted him easily, with no hang ups or repercussions. She would defend his secret to the grave, he could almost imagine him saying it as easily as the weather.
"Hey I'm you're classmate."
"Oh, Adrien right? Awesome. Hey did you have a Raichu you could trade me?"
When he was awake he could see the flaws in that reasoning, it would never be that simple but... it was a fantasy is all. One that returned every night after that.
He thought about it every day in class, every time he glanced at her from the corner of his eye.
'Hey Mari... it's me.' His eyes would follow her as she walked past him, his mind chanting, 'Hey Mari... hi. It's me. Hi...'
He said hi to her sure, talked to her as often as he could as Adrien but it didn't feel the same. It didn't feel like greeting her as Cat Noir.
It was too many hollow hellos that spurred him to reach out to her again, in much the same way she had done for him.
That night, when he came to collect her, he did not take his usual blanket and bag. He arrived on her balcony empty handed, heart thumping unevenly when she quietly opened her hatch. She was holding her skates in one hand, and very gently he took them from her before setting them down on her deck chair.
"We won't be needing those tonight," he said vaguely, smirking despite his nerves when she quirked an eyebrow at him.
"We don't need ice skates for ice skating?" she chuckled, following Cat's gesturing hands towards the railing.
"We're not ice skating this time," he spoke again, offering little information as he gripped her around the waist so he could take her weight and vault the two of them to a neighboring roof.
"Did I get my roof privileges back?" she giggled, rolling her eyes when he pursed his lips and only fusing a little when he swept her up into his arms.
"Thank you for reminding me, no you did not."
"You're ridiculous," she sighed, holding her body in a way that made it a little easier for him to run with her.
"You almost fell off."
"I was joking."
"It was a terrible joke."
"Oh coming from you?"
"Excuse me?"
He held her a little closer, sliding down the tile of a particularly steep roof. He used his staff to cross the distance to the next roof, teetering slightly because Marinette's weight had shifted. Once they landed he looked down at her to see her leaning around him slightly, reaching for something.
"What are you doing?" he asked finally, almost at their destination and needing a distraction.
"Can you not feel this?" she asked, tugging a little at something and alerting him for the first time that she had in fact grabbed his tail. "Makes sense I guess," she continued, releasing it and settling back into her spot. "It is a belt. I guess I had sorta hoped though."
"Disappointed?" he laughed, looking down to see her shrug and taking that as a yes. "We're almost there so hopefully this will make up for it."
"What are we doing exactly?" she asked, not making much of a fuss as he blatantly broke into the building, sneaking in through an open maintenance hatch.
"Well uh..." he started, lowering the two of them down into the upper supports of the concert hall, "I did promise I would play for you."
Marinette gasped, griping his suit and forcing him to look down into her wide shining eyes.
"You're going to play me the song you wrote!?"
His voice left him, his need to focus on getting them down safely enough of an excuse for him to stay silent, so all he gave her was a nod.
He expected her to cheer and wiggle and although she couldn't totally prevent that adorable excited butt wiggle that she usually did she was surprisingly quiet. Cat Noir took a deep breath and lowered them onto the concert hall stage, a gorgeous black grand piano sat prominently in its center. The only light came from windows and glass ceiling panels, so the piano was in fairly dim light but it didn't affect him any. He could see the instrument as plainly as he could at home. In fact the poor lighting only occurred to him when he set Marinette on her feet only to have her lightly keep hold of his arm.
It was so strange, to be in that concert hall alone with her, guiding her towards the bench so she could sit on one edge. It was surreal, like a dream he hadn't woken up from yet, but he knew it was real. The weight of her hands gripping his arm was enough proof of that.
She was quiet and patient, and it took him a moment to realize she was replicating his own patience when she had first skated for him. He silenced a chuckle to keep from breaking the moment, admiring how observant she could be. She could tell he was nervous and was acting accordingly, smiling at him gently any time he looked at her.
He sat down beside her, flinching with embarrassment when his tail curled around her on its own accord. He really had no say in what it did, but he was afraid to acknowledge it at all and since she hadn't reacted he was going to ignore it.
He looked down at the keys, not sure what to say as an intro at all. Very slowly he started to remove his gloves. To his relief Plagg kept to his word and had the ring phase through the material to still sit on his finger, so he was able to remove the clawed gloves without incident. He turned his head slightly when he heard Marinette inhale softly, her eyes glued to his hands in the dim light.
"Expecting claws?" he chuckled softly, and she didn't reply, something like deep consideration on her features. "Couldn't very well play with them on."
She nodded, eyes trained on them a moment more before she looked up at him. He could feel the shift in the air as she waited, and he knew now there was no escape. Not that he would have taken the chance had it been presented. He might be nervous but... he wanted to share it with her.
Part of him wondered if that's how she felt just before she skated for him for the first time.
He could hear the soft click of the keys settling down with the light pressure of his fingers, poised to begin and smiled. It was a quality piano, it rivaled his own at home. He tested a few of its keys as an excuse to wait a moment longer, the notes ringing out clear and beautiful. Then however, he glanced back down at her, eagerly watching his hands... and he stopped fooling around.
He took a deep breathe, the image of Marinette skating in the night easy to recall. He could even hear the cutting of her skates in the ice. So when she danced, so did his hands.
The sound swelled and filled the space of the concert hall, echoing out in an almost haunting way. It was better than he had ever played it before, it was more... emotional. It turned and soared, just like an ice skater. Just like Marinette.
The thought of making mistakes left him completely, because it wasn't about impressing her anymore. It was just about showing her, sharing it with her. It was like a relief, having the song that had ghosted his mind every time he saw her finally pour out from him in this way. Like it could only really be released if she was there to hear it. It didn't leave a hole in him... it was almost like it filled a space.
He could hear her over the music, it was quiet and almost inaudible, but it was a sigh. During a slower part where he could brave a glance, he saw that her eyes were closed, head bowed slightly. She was smiling.
As he started to pull her song to a close it really did feel like the last traces of something powerful fled into the darkness of the hall. He had completed its task.
He breathed almost in a sigh himself when the song concluded, the silence that came after calming and reassuring. His hands stayed on the keys for a little while more, before he drew his hands into his lap and turned to look at Marinette.
Her eyes were open now, staring at his discarded gloves placed above the keys and out of the way with a subdued smile on her face. Her eyes almost... shimmered, and it was then that he realized they were watery. She hadn't shed tears, but she had come close and the realization filled him with pride.
"It was beautiful," she whispered, her smile spreading as she reached up to wipe her eyes. "It was so... wonderful. Thank you so much... it was amazing you're amazing."
She looked up at him, catching his softly glowing green eyes in the dark and bit back a chuckle, knowing he was human behind such inhuman features.
"Thank you... for sharing that with me..." she finally spoke again, reaching out towards the piano and claiming one of his gloves, turning a claw between her thumb and index finger as that deep consideration claimed her features again.
"I'm glad you liked it... it was for you after all," he chuckled quietly, his confidence surprising him. He was still riding the high of executing it so well.
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