🔞

Alexander blocks my way, pushing me back into the elevator before pushing the emergency button which stop the elevator for a certain amount of minutes. "Alexander, what the fuck are you doing?" I yell at him; I move to stop the bell, but he blocks it with his hands.

My eyes looks up and Alexander stares down at me.

"What? Going to leave like last night. Got what you wanted and now you're done." I scoff, folding my arms. I try to peel his hand away using both of mine, fuck me, this man is strong. I use my foot at one point to give me enough power.

"You think I used you last night?"

"Didn't you?" I whisper, Alexander shakes his head. "You left me after we kissed-and you didn't come back the whole night."

Before he releases the button and towers over me, his thumb brushes his lips. My hands grip his biceps as his lips attack mine; I had to tiptoe to reach half his height. My hands snake around his neck, and his hand grabs the bottom of my thigh before lifting me up to wrap my legs around his waist.

"Alexander..." I whisper between our kisses; his hands slide around my neck before pulling away. His thumb grazes my chin, before sliding down my lips. I feel him harden against me, he felt huge.

"I don't use women. I'm not a womaniser. I'm not a little boy. I'm a man. Understand Natalie." I nod my head; his blue eyes turns dark. "Words."

"Yes. Understood."

"Good."

Jealousy is more visible than one might think; it certainly does not wear a cloak of invisibility. Sometimes, in life plans change.

Like the plan of me going to the supermarket? Yeah. Fuck that. His lips looked so good right now, his eyes fit so well on his face. I kiss down his jaw, Alexander whispers little nothings as I suck gently onto his neck.

Then his phone begins ringing, I wish he would just ignore it, but he didn't. He sets me down onto the floor and glances at the ID. I hold my breath behind pursed lips to steel myself against the elevator, he stops the emergency button.

"Ladno, budu cherez pyatnadtsat'."

[I'll be there in fifteen]

Alexander presses the ground floor; the moment the door opens he just walks out. Why-My jaw tenses, he didn't even say goodbye, he didn't do anything. He left as if-Just like this last night. Am I-Am I seriously thinking about this right now? Is he worth the time?

At the end of the day, we are basically strangers.

I mean nothing to him, the same way he means nothing to me. But if I really agreed with that, then I would say I'm lying. Because I have started to gain a small-tiny amount of feelings for Alexander. Or maybe-and hopefully this is not the cause but maybe I am trying to fix him, to change him because I never had the opportunity to help the little boy.

I exit into the loft, I don't dare look back, my fingers fiddle with the handle of my keys as I walk into the direction of the store. It was evening time; I didn't even realise.

The doors open automatically, and I grab a basket.

I glance down at my list, walking through each isle to get exactly what I need. I put various fruits into my basket. I hate peaches, so that was just a no go. I then look up and see Ilene, she was holding a bottle of wine and seeing the brand of it. I decided to go say hi to her, "Ilene? Hey." I speak, she looks up and turns to me.

Her eyes widen as he mouth falls open, then it turns into a smile. She acted surprised to see me, "oh-Nova, hi...how are you?"

"I'm good, how's your mum?"

"My mum? She's fine why wouldn't she be?" She asks confused, something stabs me in the heart, and I knew from that moment she used it as an excuse.

"Because you told me she fell down the stairs? That's why you had to cancel Thursday?" I point out, she gasps before grabbing onto my arm.

"Oh right, yeah, sorry that fell out of my mind." She scoffs, hitting the side of her head.

"We should still go out, I heard there's a bar downtown-" I offer, she interrupts me before I could even finish my sentence.

"Nova-I don't want to lie to you but we can't." I rose a brow, okay, now the truths coming out. I knew it was a fucking lie.

"Why not?" I chuckle awkwardly, she sighs and settles the wine into her basket which causes a little noise.

"Your mum-she...none of my friends particularly want to hang out with you. They don't feel comfortable to be friends with a 'killers daughter'."

That's what they labelled me.

"What your mum said about the little boy was really uncool Nova, really uncool...I'm sorry, I hope you can understand where we come from." I nod my head, what else would I do? Back a killer? A murderer?

I stood there completely embarrassed and moulded my lips into my mouth, she squeezes my shoulders and walks past me. I wipe the tear that accidentally rolled down my cheeks, I look down at the basket and return all the items before walking out of the store.

If I knew it would be this hard here, I would have never left New York. It was moments like this where I realised how selfish my mother was, yet i also felt like I deserved this torment. If i did something, if I helped the little boy then maybe we-I would not have this many people hating me.

This was all my fault.

As much as it was my mothers.

I tuck my hands into my jacket and walk away, I had a shift.

I need to go get ready.

◾◾◾

I was working the night shift, and with every customer that came. I felt oddly weird. Ilene's words hit me hard, and I never-well I do.

Does this whole town really hate me so much? I lock the door of the shop and begin to clean the surfaces. I scrub the tables as if it was my last night alive. I scrubbed like my life depended on it.

I walk to clean the coffee machine and begin rubbing the cloth around it to make sure it is in good use for tomorrow.

However, i accidentally pressed the wrong button which caused the excess coffee to spill all over my shirt. Now I know why we wear aprons. I slam the towel onto the counter and walk to the back, I shuffle through my bag and take out a black hoodie.

I slide of my current shirt until a loud crash is heard, my head snaps to the kitchen. I feel my heart increase, I slowly grab the lamp that was on the desk before creepily walking out from the back.

I tighten my grip around the lamp, slowly pushing the kitchen door open. I see a huge figure in the corner of the room, the freezer door fully open. The light outlining his familiar figure. I did not take a single moment before slamming his head with the lamp, he doesn't move muscle.

The shards of glass spread across the floor.

I stumble back as he slowly turns around, his eyes were an eerie electric blue.

Alexander.